


Our First Christmas

by burblyboy, RedBeautyFTW



Series: A Series of Firsts [1]
Category: Teenage Bounty Hunters (TV), stepril
Genre: 25 Days of Christmas Prompt Challenge, Alternate Universe - High School, Christmas Fluff, Domestic Fluff, Epic Friendship, F/F, First Christmas, Fluff and Humor, Friendship/Love, Girls Kissing, Idiots in Love, Sarcasm, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, True Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-01
Updated: 2020-12-26
Packaged: 2021-03-10 06:00:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 25
Words: 108,010
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27809497
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/burblyboy/pseuds/burblyboy, https://archiveofourown.org/users/RedBeautyFTW/pseuds/RedBeautyFTW
Summary: Sterling and April are together... like, together-together.  John Stevens is in jail, April's mom is supportive, and they are living their Senior year as Willingham's power couple...The holidays have begun and Sterling wants to make sure she gets April the perfect gift for their first Christmas together....April just wants to give Sterling everything...Welcome to the 25 Days of Stepril (and everyone in between)...
Relationships: April Stevens & Sterling Wesley, April Stevens/Sterling Wesley
Series: A Series of Firsts [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2085270
Comments: 119
Kudos: 386





	1. "Do It Again"

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome to December!
> 
> I did this last year for Juliantina and really wanted to do the something special for Stepril (even though I went through a very lengthy debate and some self loathing about my writing) 
> 
> So I found some great prompts and teamed up with Hal (burblyboy) and we came up with a fluffy little adventure we hope you enjoy going on with us...
> 
> Please.. please.. leave some love and a comment... WE LOVE COMMENTS... Love hearing what you all think!
> 
> And, as always, thanks for reading!!
> 
> ******************************************************************************************************

Sterling Wesley was never deeply concerned about her gift giving skills. 

There was never an issue finding the perfect gift for anyone she shopped for. Even if it was a random secret Santa present. She always chose the right thing, making sure the gift was a combination of practical, fun, and sentimental. Every holiday, her choices were praised by friends and family alike. 

But this year was different. 

It was her and April’s first Christmas together as a couple. 

They’d already made it through Thanksgiving, combining their families together (minus a jailed John Stevens, thank the lord) and that evening went off without a hitch. April’s mother and Debbie were close before all of the drama, so it wasn’t hard for them to fall back into step. Anderson loved April and treated her like she was one of his own. And Blair, oddly enough, was on her best behavior for most of the evening. 

Until Blair decided to jump start Sterling’s anxiety with how important she and April’s first Christmas was. How the first one was always the most memorable and Sterling _had_ to make sure her gift was perfect. There was no room for mistakes. 

“I mean, what about a bracelet?” Sterling asked, walking side by side with Blair toward Fellowship. She adjusted the strap of her bag over her shoulder. “She would like that, wouldn’t she?” 

“Uh-huh. Sure. Bracelets are cool,” Blair responded absentmindedly as she scrolled through the apps on her phone. “You should do that.” 

Sterling furrowed her brow turning her attention slightly to her left. “You’re not even listening to me.” 

“Sure, I am,” Blair lied, eyes fixated on her phone screen. She chuckled to herself as she pressed her thumb against the screen to like a meme. “You said something about a necklace.” 

“Bracelet.” 

“Same difference.” 

Sterling exhaled, exasperated as she grabbed her sister’s arm halting both their steps. “You’re supposed to be helping me.” 

Blair growled, tossing her head back. “Sterl, whatever you get her she’s going to love.” She slid her phone into her backpack. “You need to relax.” 

“Relax? You’re telling me to relax?” Sterling held her hand out toward Blair, disbelief filling her features. “It’s your fault I’m overthinking this in the first place!” 

Blair let out an overly dramatic gasp, placing her hand against her chest. “You’re blaming this on me? April is _your_ girlfriend. It’s not my fault that she has unreasonable expectations of perfection.” 

Sterling opened her mouth to argue but was immediately cut off when Blair raised her hand. 

“Speaking of which, I’m not helping with the Fellowship decorations this year.” 

“What? Why? You said you would.” 

“Do you honestly think I want to be subjected to your girlfriend’s holiday power trip?” Blair snorted, shaking her head. “That’s your turn-on, not mine.” A broad, sarcastic smile filled her face as she reached out and adjusted Sterling’s collar. “I’ll be back to pick you up at six though.” She raised an eyebrow. “Unless you plan on getting in some boning time…” 

Sterling grunted, lightly swatting her sister’s hand away. “Fine, but we’re going to the mall later because, regardless of whatever way you try to spin this-“ She pointed a stern finger at her twin. “My Christmas gift panic is your fault.” 

“Whatever,” Blair huffed dismissively. She pulled her phone out of her pocket again checking the time. Her brow raised expectantly. “So, six?” 

“Yeah, we should be done by then.” 

Blair slapped her hand down on Sterling’s shoulder. “Remember, the Christmas lights go on the tree and around the room.” She raised her free hand and narrowed her eyes as she moved her index finger in a circle. “They’re not a substitute for handcuffs or whatever weird things you two do.” 

“Blair, for the love of the Lord,” Sterling groaned, pushing her arm away. She pointed toward the double doors leading to the exit. “Just go.” 

“Later!” Blair flashed a mischievous grin accompanied by a peace sign before making her way down the hall and out of the double doors. 

“So annoying,” Sterling muttered to no one as she half rolled her eyes and continued on her way toward Fellowship….. 

********************************* 

Preparing for the holidays was always a hectic time for Fellowship. 

The year she took over Fellowship, Ellen decided they would dedicate the first day of December to making sure their meeting room was festive and filled with the holiday spirit. She brought out boxes of lights, ornaments, and a large faux tree that stood dead off to the side towering over all of the fixtures inside the space. She happily told the students to “go wild” and give the room the “brightly colored goodness Jesus himself would enjoy!” 

Sterling smiled, amused by Ellen’s enthusiasm as she walked further inside the room. She watched as Ellen awkwardly danced around the students working diligently on the tasks April assigned them. Lorna and Franklin hung tinsel and garland in every corner possible. Ezequiel and Hannah B. worked on decorating the Christmas tree and April stood in the center of the room, directing everyone toward accomplishing her vision for the perfect décor. 

Looking at her girlfriend, so firmly in her element, filled Sterling with pride. She smiled widely when April swiveled on her heels to finally notice her, a matching smile breaking out on her girlfriend’s cute face, and pride was replaced with something else on Sterling’s. She just couldn't help herself. Even after all these months together, whenever she saw April, her face transformed into that of a dopey, lovesick teenager. 

And when April took a couple of quick paces to close the distance, Sterling couldn't help but to bounce excitedly. There were a lot of things she had no control over when April was around, so she leaned forward, eager to greet her girlfriend with a kiss. A perfectly respectable, chaste kiss. No tongue or anything. 

So, when instead of being met by soft lips, April unceremoniously shoved a big box into her arms, Sterling couldn't help the disappointed whine that escaped. 

"Sterling, I'm so glad to see you. Would you please untangle this box of lights? These... incompetent fools just made it worse. Not even a Girl Scout could name the knots their flawed, oh- _so_ -flawed, attempts resulted in," April grumbled before giving Sterling's cheek a quick peck. "Thanks, sweetheart. I know you'll do better" 

With a sigh, Sterling hauled the box over to the tree and sat down next to Ezequiel, a sympathetic look gracing his face as he looked down, noticing her current predicament. "She got you too? Yeah, she's in total Queen B mode today..." 

“Be nice, Ezequiel,” Sterling warned as she pulled a jumbled mess of lights from the box. It was like looking at a brightly colored ball of pure disaster. 

Ezequiel huffed, pursing his lips. “I was being nice.” 

Hannah B. cocked her head as she fiddled with a particularly uncooperative snowman ornament. “Wouldn’t it be Queen A though?” She raised an eyebrow as she hooked the ornament onto the tree. “I mean, her name is April. Not like, Beatrice or something.” 

Ezequiel snapped his head in her direction. His brow knitted together tightly in an unexplainable expression. “What? No, the B is not for her first name.” 

“Then what’s it for?” 

“Are you serious?” 

Sterling quietly chuckled at the duo, shaking her head as she returned to the task at hand. April was right. Whoever thought the best idea to untangle the lights was to tangle them even tighter together needed a swift kick to the head. She sighed heavily, dropping the ball of lights onto her lap as she further assessed her options for pulling the strings apart. 

“No, Franklin! You can’t put purple with red! Who even brought out purple garland? It’s not a Christmas color!” 

The sound of April’s commanding tone made Sterling look up from her messy task. Sterling never missed an opportunity to see April truly take charge of a situation. Even though her stature was small, her presence was huge, and it was one of the things Sterling loved most about her. Her eyes followed every movement April made on her path to correct Franklin’s obvious mistakes. 

Franklin pressed his hands into his hips, leaning aggressively toward April, a string of silver garland hanging from his closed fists. “If purple isn't a Christmas color, why do they sell it at the store?” 

April closed her eyes taking in a deep calming breath. "They also sell Santa Claus toilet seat covers. It's called capitalism. If you ever opened a textbook you might not be so ignorant." She snatched the garland from his hand and stomped toward a small step stool. “I’ll do it myself.” 

Sterling may have lingered a little too long on the flex in April’s calves as she stood on the step stool to hang the garland. She snapped from her daze the moment April stepped down and swallowed to cover the sudden dryness in her throat. She watched as her girlfriend animatedly moved her hands, showing an elaborate picture of what exactly she was looking for. 

That’s when Sterling noticed her ring finger. Something was missing. Her purity ring was gone. 

She remembered April incessantly turning the band during Thanksgiving dinner, like it was giving her a rash. April talked about how her father made her swear to not give into her own desires, because saving herself was the Christian thing to do. She even hinted at discarding the band and removing the last piece of John Stevens plaguing her life. As much as Sterling knew April loved wearing her rings and her cross, she also hated the constant reminder of her father’s controlling ways. 

A realization hit Sterling like a bolt of lightning. The idea for the perfect Christmas gift for the most perfect person in the entire world. Something she would love and would hold better memories than the constricting band of gold John Stevens had placed on her finger. What better way to show April how much she meant to her, how much she would always mean to her, by buying her a new ring. 

A promise ring. 

The pride in her gift idea lasted a total of ten seconds before Sterling started to listen to a little voice in the back of her mind. The one telling her she, once again, was moving too fast. A promise ring was a commitment which held a place for an even BIGGER commitment. One she knew that she would love to make with April one day, but was unsure if April felt ready for. 

If she would ever feel ready for it. 

She was powerless to climb out of the rabbit hole her brain sent her down until she felt the warmth of a soft palm press against her cheek. She heard the faint sound of her name being called out. A much softer sound than the tone being hurled at Franklin just moments before. Sterling snapped out of her own thoughts and met the loving blue eyes staring back at her. 

“Sterl, I have the utmost faith that you are the only person in this room that’s not going to drive me crazy tonight.” The corner of her mouth tilted upward, and Sterling felt the flutter in her chest her half smile always brought on. “So, please, honey… I need you to focus.” 

Sterling nodded almost numbly as she maintained eye contact with the beautiful girl staring back at her. April’s smile spread a little further and she mouthed a small thank you. She glanced around quickly, placing a small, quick kiss against Sterling’s lips. She tried not to whine at the loss of contact but knew there would be more when April touched her chin then tossed her a tiny, adoring wink. 

April stood back up, still looking lovingly at a distracted Sterling who pawed uselessly at the insane tangle in her lap. Sterling smiled up at April and was rewarded with a loving touch, April's fingers lightly brushing over her cheek. When April finally turned away, Sterling returned from her stupor and looked down at the ball of lights in front of her with a deep sigh. 

If she was going to be spared the wrath of April, she needed to figure this out. If... Yeah, if... If she wanted to be spared. Sterling looked around the Fellowship room, making sure nobody noticed the blush spreading across her face. But all of them were completely preoccupied, trying ridiculously hard to complete whatever task April had set out for them to a satisfactory standard. 

She could relate. 

Sterling yanked lightly at one piece of a cable that seemed promisingly loose, but instead of coming undone, it snagged and refused to move another inch. Of all the tasks she could've been given, why did it have to be one that seemed impossible? She caught April glancing at her out of the corner of her eye and gave a quick thumbs up before resuming her exploratory tugging. 

Not that her mind was really focused on untangling this particular mess, instead it kept returning to the idea of giving April a promise ring for Christmas. A vastly different kind of mess. She could feel her heartbeat pick up as images of sliding a ring on to April's finger flooded her mind and filled her with such warmth and happiness that she thought she might pass out from a heatstroke. 

She snapped back to reality when she heard April bark something at the remaining members of The Holy Trinity; April had turned her focus toward Hannah B. and Ezequiel, giving their work a quick once-over. "What's this supposed to be? Is this really all you've done?" April asked through gritted teeth. "I gave you the simple task of decorating the tree. Tinsel. Baubles. Star on top." She shook her head. At least nothing hanging from the tree was made from heavy cardboard. 

"I don't get why this is such a big deal," Ezequiel said with a carefree shrug. "Our beautifully decorated tree is not being entered into a tree decoration competition or anything." He tossed some tinsel over his shoulder, glancing back quickly to see it drape itself across at least three branches. "If such a thing even exists." 

"I'm sure there's a Netflix show," Hannah B offered, her voice bright and seemingly unconcerned with the darkening expression on April's face. "I was watching Sugar Rush Christmas the other night, and--" 

"And this pertains to our discussion how exactly?" April snapped. 

"It's, well, it's about Christmassy things," Hannah B said like it was the most obvious thing ever, how sugary confections and trees belonged together as long as it was about Christmas. "And people were being judged, but I'm not sure on what exactly." 

"Probably on how fast they could induce a hyperglycemic coma in the judges," Ezequiel said with a snort. 

"I don't care," April said, feeling how everything was slipping through her fingers. "This tree will stand here until winter break, and while it won't be the centerpiece it deserves to be, we will make certain it is a tree that lives up to the Willingham standards of excellence." 

“Then we need lights. No Christmas tree is complete without lights,” Ezequiel pointed out and turned to his fellow victim. “Don’t you agree, Hannah B?” 

She nodded her head vigorously. “Absolutely. A Christmas tree is nothing without twinkling lights. The way they bounce off the ornaments and make them sparkle.” 

“See, April, we clearly need the lights. But where are they hiding? I wonder. Sterling, oh, Sterling... how are you doing?” he asked sweetly, a knowing smirk trying to break through. 

April looked at Ezequiel, stone-faced. He might have a point, normally. But not only was he trying to get away with a subpar decorating job, but he was also trying to put her girlfriend on the spot. No, that wasn’t happening. 

April glanced over at Sterling, still struggling fruitlessly but tirelessly. She couldn’t yell at her. Wouldn’t yell at her. So, she turned back to Ezequiel and Hannah B., giving them the sweetest smile she could manage. “ _I_ don’t like how you decorated the tree. Do it again.” 

******************************* 

Shortly before six, April and Sterling finally walked out the doors of Willingham Academy, arm in arm, Sterling pulling April closer to give her a squeeze. “Thank you for that.” 

April laughed softly and gave her girlfriend a shy smile. “I don’t know what you’re talking about” 

“With Ezequiel. You didn’t have to do that.” 

“He was trying to use you as a pawn against me.” 

“Well, you are the Queen B,” Sterling laughed when April gave her a glare. “His words! Guess you showed him in the end. You’re not the kind of player who sacrifices her pawns willy-nilly.” 

“Especially not when they’re as adorable as you. I don’t think he’ll try that again anytime soon.” 

They reached the parking lot, Blair nowhere to be found yet, so Sterling pulled April around to face her, resting her hands on her girlfriend’s hips. “You didn’t have to make them remove every single piece of decoration and start from scratch.” 

“Didn’t I?” April asked with a questioning half-smile playing across her lips, slipping her hands over Sterling’s shoulders. 

“Babe, you know I think your commanding presence is hot,” Sterling said, tugging April closer to her, as to accentuate just how much she meant that last word, “but... maybe ease up on Ezequiel and Hannah B. a little. They’re your friends.” 

“My ‘commanding presence’ netted us a Christmas tree to be proud of, but I know what you mean. I’ll see what I can do.” 

“That’s all I ask.” 

“Franklin, though--” 

“Got what he deserved,” Sterling agreed with a laugh, leaning down for a kiss. 

Of course, that’s when Blair pulled up, tires screeching, doing what many would mistake for a flawless handbrake turn instead of poor driving, ruining the moment. She rolled down the window, making a disgusted face the whole time. "God, you two are gross! Come on, Sterl. Mom said dinner in thirty." 

Sterling narrowed her eyes at Blair before returning her attention back to April. “I’ll call you later,” she promised as she leaned down and pressed a long kiss to her waiting lips. 

April smiled through the kiss, resting her hand on the nape of Sterling’s neck. She inched back, looking her girlfriend in the eyes. “Love you.” 

Sterling’s smile brightened. “Love you more.” 

She gave April another quick kiss goodbye then climbed into the passenger seat of the Volt. The wide smile remained on her lips as she watched April walked toward her own car. The shorter girl turned slightly, giving Sterling a small wave followed by a air kiss. Sterling bit her lip trying to suppress her happiness as she turned away and shifted more comfortably in her seat. 

Blair made a gagging noise earning a small punch to the arm as they sped out of the parking lot and headed home….


	2. "Reindeer Slippers"

April lay on her bed, her back pressed against her headboard, listening to the Christmas music filtering through her Baby Yoda Bluetooth speaker. It was honestly the silliest electronic she owned but it was useful and from Sterling, which was the most important thing. She glanced to the side, watching as the little green figure did a childlike sway to the beat of the music. A quiet laugh escaped her as she shook her head.

Only Sterling would find something that was both practical and adorable. And for no reason other than she thought of April when she saw it.

She smiled at the memory and thanked God for the fact that everything in her life worked out for the better. This was honestly the first Christmas in a long time that she was genuinely excited for. Her father was gone so the tension in her home had pretty much dissipated. She was able to open up to her mother and tell her the truth about herself. Her mother supporting her was a gift in itself and April would forever be grateful for that.

Just like she would forever be grateful for Sterling and the second chance they were given.

Her stomach fluttered as it always did when she thought of Sterling. She still wasn’t sure how she was so lucky to finally be with the person she’d loved for pretty much half her life. Which is why she found herself up late on a school night trying to find the perfect gift for Sterling. Not like she didn’t already have six items in her cart for her girlfriend as it was.

The song changed and April mindlessly hummed along with the new tune as her feet swayed back and forth to the beat. A soft knock on her door pulled her attention from her task. She glanced at the time on the corner of her screen, surprised that her mother was still up. She placed her hand on her laptop half closing the device. Sterling wasn’t the only person she was shopping for, so she needed to make sure her normally curious mother didn’t see anything.

“Come in,” April called out, sitting up a bit straighter against her headboard.

The door opened slowly, and her mother stuck her head inside through the small space. “I heard the music when I passed by and wanted to check if you were still up,” her mother said, giving her a warm smile. “I thought you might have fallen asleep and forgot to turn off that—“ her hand appeared through the space and she motioned toward Baby Yoda “—thing Sterling thought would be a good idea to bring into this house.”

April furrowed her brow. She knew her mother was teasing her, but her tone noted how frightening she actually thought Baby Yoda was. “Mom, stop, he’s cute.” She leaned to the side and patted the speaker on its head. “I love Baby Yoda.”

Mrs. Stevens wrinkled her nose. “It’s creepy. I’m waiting for that thing to come alive and destroy the house.”

“Wow, thanks for the nightmare fuel, mom,” April responded, sarcastically and made a face causing her mother to laugh. She smiled at the sound of her mom happy. It had been a long time since she’d heard her laugh. “I’ll turn it down.”

Her mother raised an eyebrow. “You know, you actually should be asleep. You have school tomorrow.” She smiled as she pushed the door further open and stepped inside. “Break hasn’t started yet.”

April looked up at her mother as she stepped closer to her bed. “I won’t be up much longer.” She patted the top of her laptop. “I’m just trying to find a Christmas gift for Sterling.”

Mrs. Stevens sat on the edge of her bed, gently resting her hand on April’s comforter covered legs. “Whatever you get her, she’ll love. You know that, right?”

April nodded.

Mrs. Stevens looked down for a moment as if she was gathering her thoughts. She sighed then met her daughter’s eyes once again. “Thank you for feeling comfortable enough to tell me about your relationship with Sterling. I know you two have been together for a while now, but I feel like I never really told you how happy I am that you’re happy.”

April opened her mouth, but felt her mother tighten her grip around her calf signaling that she still had more to say. She closed her mouth, rolling her lips together and waited patiently for her to continue.

“Sterling is wonderful. She always has been. Even when you two were going off and causing chaos during Sunday service.” The older woman chuckled lightly then sighed. “You respect each other, and you love each other and that is so important, sweetie. So very important.”

April knew her mother was referring to what lacked in her relationship with her father. She prayed one day her mother would find peace and someone who gave her everything she deserved. It wasn’t often that a daughter was so hopeful that their parent would move on and find someone who wasn’t a piece of shit. But April genuinely wanted her mother to have that sense of peace and happiness.

Now more than ever.

April leaned over her laptop, placing her hand over her mother’s. “Thank you for being so supportive, mom. I love you so much.”

Mrs. Stevens smiled, placing her free hand on top of their joined ones. “I love you too.” She took in a deep inhale as she patted April’s hand. “Okay, I’m going to bed.” She stood up, flashing her daughter a mock stern look. “Don’t stay up much longer.”

April grinned, crossing her heart. “Promise.” She turned slightly, reaching out to grab her phone to check the time. “I’ll be in bed by—“ Her words stalled on her lips as she noticed a message on her screen. “Oh, shoot, Sterling texted me.”

Her mother hummed, raising an eyebrow. “Also, not an excuse to stay up late,” she noted, her motherly tone shining through her words.

April looked up at her with a small chuckle. “I’m sure she’s just saying goodnight.”

“Mmhmm.” Her mother shuffled closer, inching down to place a small kiss on the top her head. “Goodnight, sweetie.”

“Night, mom.”

When April unlocked her phone, she realized Sterling sent her the message a whole twenty minutes ago. She’d been too wrapped up in scrolling through the fifteenth page of search results for one of the sillier gift ideas that had come to mind to notice and then her mother made her appearance. Twenty minutes where she ended up ignoring her girlfriend, even if that never was her intention. She’d have to look into turning off that blasted automatic do-not-disturb; Sterling calling or texting was never unwelcome. Then she read the message and her heart started racing.

 **Sterl** 💖  
"Are you up, babe? I know it's late and you need your  
sleep, but I need to talk. Something horrible happened."

She immediately reached up and clicked on Sterling’s smiling face to initiate a FaceTime call, not caring one iota about the late hour, her mind conjuring up countless possibilities—no, April thought as she took a deep breath. Sterling was out, her parents knew about their relationship and supported them wholeheartedly. April knew she might be projecting her own fears-of-old onto Sterling, but the truth was that some things were no longer immediate threats. Some of the possibilities had been dealt with accordingly and, subsequently, were off the table.

That still left a plethora of scenarios for April’s fertile imagination to throw at her while she waited for Sterling to answer. What if something had happened to Blair? She was still out there, chasing and catching skips with Bowser on a regular basis. Sterling assured April that it was safe, perfectly safe, but she’d have none of that. Sterling relented and agreed to stop putting herself in danger after April made a very convincing argument using just her lips, pointing out that there would be a lot more time for _this_ if Sterling wasn’t stuck in Bowser’s car for hours and hours of boring stake-outs.

When Sterling picked up—which took about three rings too long for April’s taste—she looked like she was about to cry.

“Sterl, honey, what’s wrong? What happened?” April reached up, but only managed to smudge the screen of her phone, wishing she could instead reach through the call and give Sterling a comforting touch, wishing she should wrap her up in an embrace and take her pain away.

“My reindeer slipper broke,” Sterling answered, sounding heartbroken

"Sterling! I thought there was an emergency!"

"What do you mean? This is an emergency!” Sterling said adamantly.

April listened to the words coming out of Sterling’s mouth, disbelief playing across her own face, crinkles appearing on her brow as she tried to make sense of what was playing out in front of her. She could scarcely believe her ears: “I’m sorry, what are you saying?”

“My reindeer slipper broke. Do you not see his antler??"

“No, Sterl, I see your face,” April said with a nod and a chuckle she failed to suppress. She shouldn’t be laughing at her girlfriend’s distress, but how Sterling could be so upset over a slipper was simply adorable. “That’s why they call it FaceTime.”

She knew she should be annoyed, not charmed, and in truth, she _was_ a bit annoyed, but only because her heart had been in her throat, worry flooding every part of her being as imagined worst-case scenarios played out in her mind before Sterling picked up and started rambling about... a slipper?

“Oh. Right. Hang on.”

“No, Sterling, wait… what?” April squinted at the screen, trying to make something out from the mess of crunchy pixels swirling about. What looked like Sterling’s comforter flew by briefly before she caught a flash of Sterling’s hair splayed out across her bed.

“I’m trying to get a good angle so you can see the damage,” Sterling said, practically shouting the first part, clearly holding her phone at arm’s length, before she realized the hour and the inappropriateness of her volume. The remainder was faint and echo-y: “But the lighting isn’t that good and I’m not flexible like Blair, so—oh, crap!”

April could hear a loud thunk and her girlfriend going _Owww!_ as she tumbled off the bed and hit the floor. She covered her mouth, trying to make sure neither her mother nor Sterling could hear the laughter bubbling out of her mouth. Her girlfriend was simply ridiculous. April collected herself, never looking away from the screen, even though all she could see at the moment was darkness. “Are you okay over there? No broken bones?”

After a few moments of more blurry swirling, Sterling’s head reappeared, all flushed, her hair a mess. “I’m good. All good.”

“Good,” April echoed, smiling fondly. “Your reindeer slipper is still broken, but I’m happy that’s the only thing.”

Sterling pouted and huffed, clearly not happy, “I love these slippers. They’re freaking adorable and I don’t care if Blair says they make me look like a ten-year old.” She looked off-camera and lit up. “Hang on. Again. I think this’ll work.”

The view switched again, and April was stuck looking at Sterling’s room while she moved about, clearly having a new venue in mind. She could hear a door open and a door frame made a brief appearance before receding into darkness. “Sterl? What are you doing?”

“Just a sec. Hang. On.” The lights came on and April realized she was looking at one of the bathrooms in the Wesley house. “Yes! This’ll work. Good lighting and nothing for me to fall off of.” Sterling sounded triumphant.

“You’re being very silly right now,” April said, trying to sound stern. “It’s really late. You should be in bed. We both should be.”

“Aww, I know, but you have to see his cute little antlers. To fully understand. To appreciate just how adorable these slippers are. It’ll just take a minute.”

April saw Sterling poke at the screen and suddenly she was greeted by Sterling’s reflection in the bathroom mirror when the camera changed away from the front to the back. Sterling gave her a wave and smiled widely. “Hey again, babe.” She ran her free hand through her hair, trying to tame the mess, a sly grin plastered on her face.

It wasn’t bed hair, and it wasn’t mussy in the way it got after a particularly heated make-out session, but it was still Sterling looking so sexy that April had to remind herself to breathe. She was proud of herself for managing to keep her voice from wavering. “Hey to you too. I was told there were slippers in the offing?”

“You’re no fun,” Sterling whined.

“And you’re the one hellbent on showing off a pair of slippers,” April pointed out, refusing to take the bait being dangled right in front of her.

“Fine. They really are adorable though. I mean, just look,” she said, hoisting her foot onto the sink.

This time April did forget how to breathe. She spared the slipper a quick glance, but she couldn’t tear her eyes away from the long, slender leg that ended in a slipper-glad foot. Apparently her girlfriend had chosen to forgo pajama pants, opting to sleep in just an old T-shirt. Her jaw slacked at the sight and she hoped the action wasn’t as obvious as it felt.

She swallowed, and nodded, afraid to open her mouth for fear of what she’d say and what it might lead to. It was useless trying to hide just how the image on her screen was affecting her, and she knew Sterling knew, because her sly grin grew into a teasing smirk. “Yeah, you’re right,” April managed to squeak out. “Those are really cute slippers.”

“Right?” Sterling gushed, moving her phone around trying to give her the view of all angles. “I love them so much… well, not as much as I love you, of course but still…” She released a disappointed huff through her nose as she reached down with her free hand to hold up the broken antler. “How is he supposed to help Santa with one working antler?”

April pressed her lips together and brought her hand up to cover her mouth. Why on Earth was she blessed with such a ridiculously adorable human being for a girlfriend? “Honey, if Santa actually existed, I don’t think he would need to recruit your slippers to help deliver presents so you’re okay.”

“First of all, he does exist and, secondly, you never know. What if his boots get all messed up and he needs a backup plan?” She waved her hand dramatically near her broken slipper. “These would have been perfect but now they’re gone.”

“Well, maybe if you’re good, he’ll bring you a new pair.”

Sterling wrinkled her brow and scoffed. “I’m always good,” a wide, mischievous grin spread across her face, “you know that…”

April felt the blush instantly heat her cheeks and she cleared her throat to regain her senses. “On that note,” she breathed, playfully rolling her eyes at a now giggling Sterling. “I’m going to bed and you should too.”

“Fine.” Sterling jutted out her bottom lip in a quick pout before smiling again. “See you tomorrow at school.”

“I can’t wait,” April responded with a bright smile.

“Love you, babe. Night.”

“Love you. Goodnight.”

Sterling blew her a kiss before the screen went black, ending the call. April chuckled to herself, shaking her head at her girlfriend’s antics. She placed her phone on her nightstand then went to move her laptop when her brow furrowed in thought. She quickly opened the device once again and did a quick search. She let out a tiny, elated squeal when she found what she was looking for and clicked the buy now option.

Once her order was confirmed, she closed her laptop and placed it on the floor by her bed. She settled into bed, pulling her comforter further up her body as she snuggled in and drifted off to sleep with the knowledge that Sterling would have a brand-new pair of reindeer slippers come Christmas morning…


	3. "Start a Fire"

Sterling sat in the Fellowship room, an entire plush leather couch to herself, waiting for the Willingham Christmas Party Planning Committee meeting to start. She rolled her eyes at the unwieldy name April had settled on to the dismay of everybody else taking part, but apparently as Committee Chair, she had given herself veto powers. Sterling wasn’t sure exactly how that worked, because veto powers were usually granted, not something you could give yourself unilaterally without consulting with others, but when she had suggested that, April had vetoed the whole debate. Not even suggesting April take the affirmative had managed to bait her.

She looked down on her phone and flicked her thumb to scroll further through the article proclaiming to have “25 Perfect Gifts to Get Your Girlfriend for Christmas”. Sterling didn’t think it was fair claiming to list twenty-five gifts when your list was sectioned off into separate parts depending on how you’d categorize “your girl”, each in turn containing a measly five gift suggestions.

April definitely fell into the  _ go-getter _ category, but that didn’t mean that Sterling thought she would appreciate getting a personalized bottle of wine. Definitely not with it supposedly signaling that she needed to unwind and relax a little. Sterling stomped her feet against the floor, drumming up a storm, feeling her frustration building to a point where she could just scream. She was good at this. Her gifts were perfect. Appreciated by everybody, thoughtful  _ and _ useful. So why on earth was she having such a horrible time with this?

She swiped back and went to click on a link to open the next article, but she stopped herself when she noticed the URL. This was clearly a site targeted to men, to boyfriends and husbands failing to find appropriate gifts for girlfriends and wives. Maybe that was the problem. She debated making the search for “lesbian girlfriend” instead before refusing to put April in a neat little box, reducing her to stereotype.

April being a lesbian wasn’t the problem. List being aimed at gift-giving boyfriends and husbands wasn’t the problem. Sterling knew  _ exactly _ what the real problem was: she had already found the perfect gift, only she couldn’t give it to April. Not yet. Not this Christmas. Soon, hopefully. Someday.

She knew she only had minutes left before April would get here, everybody else falling in line, and soon after the room would be bustling with activity. With her eyes closed, she poked and prodded at the screen, hoping at least one of her touches would activate a link. If she couldn’t see to choose, she couldn’t overthink the choice. She opened one eye ever-so slightly, still poking aimlessly, disappointed to find her the list of search results still visible.

“Whacha looking at there, mobot?” April said, leaning in over Sterling’s shoulder, eyes going wide as she over-enunciated and stretched each syllable of Ellen’s absurd term to the breaking point for comedic effect.

“April, hey!” Sterling flinched, nearly sliding off the couch as she twisted and turned, trying to keep her phone screen hidden from view. “I didn’t notice you come in. I was, uh...”

“Yeah, I’d say you were very ‘uh’ indeed,” April laughed, placing her hand on Sterling’s shoulder, giving it a soft squeeze. “You were completely wrapped up in whatever it was you were looking at on your phone.”

Sterling scooted back up the couch, clutching her phone tightly to her chest, well aware of the incriminating material still filling its display. “It was n-nothing important.”

“Sterl, you were so laser-focused an elephant could’ve snuck up on you,” April said, kissing the top of the seated girl’s head, once first, then twice, burying her face in Sterling’s soft locks. “An elephant wearing tap shoes.” 

April let her fingers dance across Sterling’s shoulder, quick teasing touches moving toward her neck. April delighted in the shiver she could sense going through Sterling’s body, but when she stiffened under her touch, April frowned. Her hand stopped its journey, returning to gently caressing Sterling’s shoulder. April stood on her tip-toes so she could reach across the back of the couch to place her cheek against Sterling’s. She nuzzled her girlfriend softly, before turning to look at her. “What’s wrong? You’re very… blinky.”

“You startled me. I thought I was alone. I’ve had less effective jumpscares in horror movies.”

“Is  _ that  _ why your heart is beating so fast?” Without thinking, she wrapped her arm around Sterling, pulling her back, pulling her closer.

“April! We’re at school. In the Fellowship room.”

April leaned back and took in Sterling’s expression, trying to understand what was going on. “I’m giving my girlfriend, the other half of Willingham’s official unofficial power couple, a comforting one-arm hug. Ellen wouldn’t have any objections to our behavior.“

“I suspect there’s very little Ellen would object to as long as it involved the two of us and kept us happy.”

April looked scandalized. “Sterling! I would never! We would ne—”

“Unless the doors were locked. Then we would,” she said matter-of-factly, an impish smile playing across her lips.

“You’re incorrigible.”

“You love it.”

“I do. I love you. Even the part suggesting we might—”

“Yes. At school.”

April jumped over the back of the couch, landing neatly next to Sterling, cozying up. “Last night,” she ventured, being met by intense blue eyes eager to hear her out. “Last night, you took my breath away. The way you looked… your hair, your  _leg_ ,” April had to look away or she might do something untoward, and the doors to the Fellowship room certainly did not lock, “all of you, yes, even your slippers,” she admitted with a laugh. “I couldn’t get you out of my mind.” 

“Good. That was the point.”

“You’re such a tease.”

“Am not.”

“Just saying that is a tease.”

“Nuh uh. I would do anything you want. All you have to do is ask,” Sterling’s smile was warm and reassuring. “But I’ll never do anything you don’t feel comfortable with. Or even suggest the doing of. In this particular dance of ours, you’re leading.”

“Anything?” April swallowed, considering what Sterling had just said, the implications staggering. And so very tempting.

“Mmhmm. Anything.”

Maybe it was the way Sterling was looking at her, nothing but love in her eyes, that made April feel bolder than ever before. Maybe it was the weight of her father’s hateful purity ring being gone. April couldn’t tell, and she wasn’t sure she cared anymore; being able to finally live openly and the way she chose and wanted to, had led her here. It was crazy, but even being able to consider the things Sterling was offering her...

Before she could talk herself out of it, April spoke: “Stand up.”

“Huh? What?” Sterling sounded confused.

April cleared her throat, softening her tone. “Please, Sterl. Stand up.”

“April, I didn’t mean—”

“What, Sterl?” You didn’t mean to tease me?”

“I didn’t mean we should… Not  _ here. _ Locked doors, remember?”

“That’s why you need to make sure nobody is coming this way. Can you do that for me, Sterl? Can you turn around and make sure nobody is about to walk through those doors?” She grasped Sterling’s elbow and gently spun her around.

“April,” she hissed. “They’re  _ glass _ doors. People could see us.”

“I know. It’s kinda exciting, isn’t it?” Terrifying would be a better word, but April still felt confident about what she was doing. Sterling wasn’t the only one in this relationship who could be a tease. “But they’ll only see you, I’ll be hidden from view, as long as I—” April scooted over so she was directly behind Sterling before standing up, pressing herself to her girlfriend’s back, making her presence known “—as long as I stay  _ right  _ behind you.”

Sterling whimpered and for just a second April wondered if she was taking this too far. She only meant to tease her girlfriend, but the way she could feel her body shaking, she worried that Sterling might pass out. Be it from fear or excitement, she couldn’t be sure, not just yet anyway.

April took a step back, making sure she wasn’t touching any part of Sterling any more. “Tell me what you see. Is there anyone coming?”

“No.”

“Is anyone looking?”

“No.”

“Good. Then I can finally do something I’ve been wanting to do a long time.”

“April,” Sterling almost pleaded. “Are you sure you want to do this? Here?”

“Oh, absolutely.” April smiled to herself. If Sterling really expected her to do anything outrageous, she deserved what was coming. She waited for excruciatingly long seconds that felt like they were stretching into minutes, before she reached up and flicked Sterling’s ear.

“April, ohmygodwhat?!” Sterling shrieked and collapsed to her knees, flailing her arms around, sending the phone she’d been guarding so closely for the last ten minutes flying. Once she calmed down enough to face April, she was still panting heavily. She looked back at her girlfriend with a glare. “You’re evil.”

“I’m sorry, honey.” April kneeled beside Sterling, cradling her head in her arms, stroking her hair softly, waiting for her unbelievably sweet and sexy girlfriend’s breathing to return to normal. She suddenly realized her own heart was racing too, so she couldn’t help what she said next: “You have to admit, though, that was all kinds of…  _hot_.” 

“The ear flick wasn’t,” Sterling said with an adorable pout.

“I’ll give you that,” April nodded. “I’m really sorry for  _ that  _ part. You… you dropped a lot in my lap at once there, and it felt so exciting and wonderful. Knowing that… that is a possibility for us now.”

“It always was. I’ve always wanted you that way. I want you in every way imaginable.”

“I know. And you’ve been wonderfully patient with me. I don’t know if I can fully explain it, but once I took off that purity ring, I felt free in a way I didn’t before. Despite everything. Despite being with you for the last sixth months. Despite coming out and being accepted. Your parents. My mom. Even Blair.” April had to laugh. She never doubted that Blair would be an ally. It was the moments when she might almost consider her a friend that shocked her. “It wasn’t until I flushed that thing—”

“You’re not supposed to flush metal objects down the toilet,” Sterling said, before realizing what she was doing, her hands shooting up to cover her mouth.

“Sterl…”

She spread her fingers apart, just enough so her words weren’t muffled when she spoke again: “Sorry, I’ll be quiet. You were in the middle of being open and vulnerable and I love you for that, I love that for you, I love that being that way is part of us now. Sorry, sorry, rambling again.”

April just laughed and pulled her close for a lingering kiss. “It doesn’t matter. Nothing in the past matters anymore. You matter. You make me feel safe and loved. With you by my side, I don’t have to be  _ brave _ to be myself. You make it all so easy. I can just live my life. And that’s all I care about.”

“And is ear flicking going to play a major part in your life going forward?” Sterling asked with an earnestness that was Oscar Worthy.

April let out a laugh so loud it even surprised herself. “No, I promise you, that was a one-time thing. That other thing though, I think I might like to do more of that at some point. Behind locked doors.”

They both smiled widely and just sat there, on the floor of the Fellowship Room in Willingham Academy. The room that stood to host the Willingham Christmas Party Planning Committee meeting any minute now. They looked at each other and started chuckling as they scrambled to resume the roles as respectable students.

“Where’s my phone?” Sterling asked, frantically scouring every nook and cranny of the couch before looking underneath.

“Oh shoot, was that your phone I heard clattering in the corner when I, you know…”

“Yes! I was holding my phone and you gave me a freaking heart-attack.”

“You could’ve just put it down when, you know, when I—” April felt self-conscious. She never planned for anything like that, and she didn’t know what to call it.

“Got bossy.”

“If that’s what you want to call it.” April smirked to herself. “What do you have on there that requires you to protect it like it contains state secrets anyway? 

“Oh, nothing, I was just browsing online stores for your Christmas present. I didn’t want to ruin the surprise.”

“You know, this is the second time in as many days you’ve dropped your phone. I’m getting you a PopSocket. Ten dollars is a sensible investment if it keeps you from destroying your phone.”

Sterling rolled her eyes and made a disgusted sound. “Ugh, that’s such a grandma thing. I’d rather jump off a cliff than—”

“Admit you’re a bit of klutz?”

“Am not!” Sterling stated defiantly which earned her a short laugh in response from April who started to prepare for the meeting. “What? Babe, I am  _ not  _ a klutz.”

* * *

“Blair.” 

Blair exhaled heavily as she lowered her phone. She raised her eyes upward and locked eyes with April. She forced an interested smile. “Yes, Madam Committee Chair?” Her nose wrinkled as she made an unflattering face. “You really couldn’t think of a better title for yourself?” 

April pushed her tongue against her cheek. She promised Sterling a while ago that she would try harder to get along with Blair. Their relationship had definitely evolved but there were always these moments. The ones where Blair was bored and didn’t want to participate so she made things difficult… but only for April. 

April took in a calming breath and clasped her hands together. “I really need you to get started on those signs,” she stated, tilting her head toward the untouched poster board lying beside Blair. “And with the correct color combinations…” 

Blair narrowed her eyes and her jaw twitched beneath her skin. It was obvious she had something she wanted to say, but like April, she made a promise to Sterling. “Sure,” she grumbled through clenched teeth. “Red and green only.” 

“You can use black too.” She half turned on her heels before and looked down at Blair once again. “But not too much.” Her nose scrunched as she offered Blair a closed mouth, sarcastically pleased smile then continued on her way. 

Blair’s narrowed brown eyes followed her as she made her way back to Sterling. She pushed herself up from the floor and onto the couch still laser-focused on her sister’s girlfriend. April stopped beside Sterling and placed her hand tenderly on the blonde’s back. Sterling looked up, giving April a soft smile muttering something that caused them both to look at her laptop screen. 

_Sterling!_ Blair waited for her sister to pick up on her twin telepathy. _Sterling, I know you can hear me!_

Blair glared a small hole into her back especially when April started gently caressing her hand up and down her back. There was no way Sterling was going to respond to her now. Any physical contact from April made Sterling’s brain shut down and cut off their twin connection. There were no private conversations with Sterling when April’s hand was moving across whatever part of her body it latched onto.

In fact, Blair had noticed her sister being even more attentive and eager to please April today, even before April laid her hands on Sterling.

“Ugh,” Blair growled as she slid back down onto the floor with a loud thud. 

“Hey, you okay there?” 

Blair glanced to her right meeting Luke’s concerned expression. His green marker lingered over a poorly drawn snowman. His brown eyes were wide, and his brow raised expectantly as he waited for Blair to answer. 

“Yeah, I just—“ Blair growled, dropping her head back dramatically against the couch cushions. “April is getting on my nerves and Sterling isn’t listening to me.” She exhaled heavily and straightened back up. “I’m so done with all this prep bullshit and it’s really freaking cold in here.” She raised an eyebrow, curiously. “Aren't you cold?” 

Luke shrugged. “Kinda, I guess.” 

Blair glanced around the room, searching for something. She chewed pensively on the corner of her lip as she scanned the room. Her gaze moved passed the students huddled together working on several April assigned tasks. She scoffed, rolling her eyes wondering why everyone seemed to just fall in line whenever April snapped her fingers. 

Including her sister. 

She continued looking around, releasing tiny puffs of air that sounded like a small car backfiring. Her scan of the room stopped suddenly, and her eyes widened with excitement. “Do you think that fireplace works?” she asked, pointing to the large, decorated area behind Luke. 

Luke slowly turned his attention in the direction Blair was indicating. He turned back to her, shrugging his shoulder. “I’ve never seen anyone use it.” 

“Oh!” Blair exclaimed, wrapping her hand around Luke’s forearm. “We should get a fire going.” 

Luke startled, widening his gaze. “Oh, no, Blair. April would be really mad if we did something she didn’t approve ahead of time.” 

Blair made a dismissive noise, scrunching her face. “I don’t care. I’m cold and we’re doing this.” She leaned far to her left, grabbing her book bag. She roughly unzipped her bag and began rummaging for something. 

Luke swallowed, nervously. “Blair, we don’t even know if that thing works and we don’t have any firewood or—“ 

“Use this,” Blair offered, abruptly shoving a textbook into his hands. 

Luke glanced down at the cover then back up at Blair in surprise. “You want me to burn your Economics book?” 

Blair nodded, excitedly. 

“I can’t do that!” He ducked his head when a few students turned at the sound of his voice. He inched closer to Blair and gestured toward the book, speaking in a much lower tone. “This is school property.” 

“Which my parents pay for.” 

“It wouldn’t be right.” 

“The fact that Madam Chairperson is letting us freeze isn’t right.” She lightly shoved his shoulder. “Come on, Luke. Think of how much better it’ll feel in here. The warmer we are, the better we work.” She raised her shoulder nonchalantly. “And then April won’t be so… April.” 

Luke twisted his mouth, contemplating her reasoning. He shook his head. “I don’t know, Blair…” 

“Come on…” Blair whined, pouting for a moment. Her pout slowly turned into a mischievous grin. “I’ll give you five dollars if you make a fire.” 

Luke looked almost offended by her offer. “Five dollars? That’s not enough considering Sterling and April might kill me.” 

“Okay, five dollars and a burger from that place you like,” Blair offered, sweetening the deal. She wiggled her eyebrows and tapped the cover of the book. “Come on, Lukey. What do you say?” 

Luke swallowed, running a shaky hand through his hair. He looked around one more time, noticing April still talking with Sterling. She wasn’t even paying attention to anything going on outside of their bubble. He turned his attention back to Blair and nodded once. 

“Okay, let’s do this quick before I change my mind.” 

“Yes!” Blair pumped her fist excitedly then turned to rummage through her bag again. She pulled out a small pack of matches and handed them to Luke. “Here. Use these.” 

She placed a small pack of matches inside the palm of his hand. Luke accepted them, turning the tiny package over in his hand. He studied the words written on the outside, furrowing his brow confused by the location. He raised his attention to Blair, a dumbfounded expression on his face. 

“Lagrange Motel?” he questioned, cocking his head to the side. “Why do you have these?” 

“It’s not important. Just get the fire going,” she ordered, lightly shoving him. 

Luke muttered a few okays then scooted closer to the fireplace. He tossed the book in first, taking another nervous look around the room. It wasn’t much longer after that when the moment started to get away from him. He struggled to remove a match from the pack, ripping three off in the process. He finally pulled one free and started to scrape it against the small sandpaper like strip. 

As if she sensed something was amiss, April raised her head and furrowed her brow tightly. Sterling looked up as well, measuring her girlfriend’s expression. She lightly shook her head, flashing April a questioning look. April held up her finger, prompting Sterling to silence herself by pulling her bottom lip between her teeth. 

“Something’s not right,” April noted, slowly turning on her heels. “Why is Luke by the fireplace?” 

Sterling turned halfway in her chair following her girlfriend’s stare. Luke was on his knees in front of the decorative fireplace seeming to struggle with something. He wiped his brow with the back of his hand then went back to whatever he was fumbling with. April squinted trying to get a better look at what was in the boy’s hand. 

A sharp gasp escaped her once she figured it out and she was halfway across the small expanse of space before Sterling could even say “what”. 

“Luke Creswell!” 

“Uh oh…” 

April snatched the book of matches from Luke’s hand. “Were you seriously about to try and start a fire?! In a  _ faux  _ fireplace? You do realize that the chimney is blocked off because this is just for design, right?” April scolded, glaring down at the boy who was now sweating a little bit harder. He opened his mouth but was immediately cut off. “What were you even going to burn? Is that-is that a textbook? What is wrong with you?” 

“Okay, okay. Hang on a sec, April,” Blair requested, rising to her feet. She tried not to look too frightened by the seething expression on April’s face. “It was my fault. I told Luke I was cold.” 

“So put on your blazer,” April growled, throwing her hand out to the side. “Don’t try and set the entire school on fire!” 

Before April had a chance to continue scolding Blair and Luke for the complete lack of common sense, Sterling placed her hands on her hips, pulling her body back. She took in a quiet breath when the blonde tilted her head down, breathing lightly against the shell of her ear. 

“Babe, breathe,” she whispered, placing a small kiss against the edge of her jaw. “Everything is okay. Nothing burnt down.” 

“But it could have-—“ 

“I know, but you stopped it from happening so we’re good.” She wrapped her arms around April’s waist giving her a comforting squeeze. She raised her attention to Blair, giving her a stern look. “And I’m sure Blair wasn’t seriously going to let Luke go through with starting a fire.” 

“She offered me five dollars,” Luke confessed, the guilt written all over his face 

Blair shot him a look. “Thanks for my place under the bus, Luke.” 

His jaw slacked and he raised his shoulders unsure of what he should have actually said. 

April was seething. Her jaw twitched underneath her skin as she burned her stare into Blair’s eyes. They maintained eye contact and it was obvious that was the only form of an apology she was going to receive from the brunette. Her blue eyes shifted downward and Blair followed her gaze which landed directly on the still untouched poster board. 

April pointed at the blank paper. “Finish. That. Sign,” she ordered through clenched teeth as she stepped out of Sterling’s embrace and walked away. 

Luke rose to his feet and mumbled an apology before gathering his project and finding a new spot to work next to Franklin. Sterling crossed her arms against her chest and took a step closer to her sister. She raised her eyebrow expectantly and Blair sighed, rolling her eyes at her own behavior. 

“I’m sorry,” Blair apologized, genuinely. She held her hands up. “I was bored and cold and I took it too far and I’m sorry. Like, legit, sorry.” 

Sterling remained quiet for a moment then nodded. “Okay but can you just-go easy on her,” she requested, glancing at April who was calmly talking to another group of students. She returned her attention to her sister. “This Christmas is kinda special… for both of us. She just wants everything to be as close to perfect as possible.” She reached out lightly nudging Blair. “So, maybe we can just work together to try and make that happen… that would be awesome.” 

Blair nodded, sheepishly. She looked down at her feet momentarily, shuffling them against the hardwood floor. “I’ll behave.” 

Sterling pulled her into a hug. “That’s all I ask.” She gave her a tight squeeze then inched back. She motioned her head toward the poster board. “Finish the sign.” 

Blair rolled her eyes. “Yeah, yeah, I’m on it,” she muttered as they shared a smile then went back to their respective projects…


	4. "Can you cuddle with me?"

Sterling walked down the halls of Willingham Academy, occasionally bumping into a fellow student by mistake, taking quick strides, hoping she’d be able to catch April at her locker before she disappeared into another class. She had things on her mind and a cute girlfriend to convince. 

By the time Sterling reached April, she was practically running, chaos in her wake, so instead of coming to a graceful halt, she skidded and nearly crashed into her girlfriend, slamming into the adjacent locker. 

“Hey!” Sterling said, her breathing labored. 

“Hello to you too,” April said, laughing at the state of the blonde before giving her a quick kiss. 

“You’re still coming over after school, right?” 

“We made plans, yes,” April agreed with a nod, rifling through her locker, looking for her graphing calculator. 

“Cool. I was thinking we’d get a head start on next week’s assignments, because I know you like that, and then—” Sterling dropped her voice, leaning closer. “My parents won’t be home, so we’ll have the whole house to ourselves. We can play music as loudly as we want and jump on the couch like when we were kids and bang our heads to the tunes.” 

“Tunes?” April eyed Sterling skeptically. 

“C’mon, babe, you know what I mean. We can have an evening just to ourselves—” 

“Won’t your sister be there? ‘Tunes’ sounds like a word she might use to describe the music she listens to. If you can even call that music,” April scoffed, making her disdain for Lamb of God obvious. 

“Yes, but…” 

“This should be good.” April closed her locker, clutching her calc textbook closely and leaned back. “Do go ahead.” 

“April, please. She felt really bad about the whole fireplace incident.” 

“As she should. Can you imagine if—” 

“I can,” Sterling nodded her head vigorously, eyes wide. “If you hadn’t been there, disaster. Boom! Or, uh, whatever sound a blazing fire would make. And I think Blair learned her lesson.” 

“Which is?” April asked, quirking her brows quizzically. 

“Uh, er, don’t play with matches?” 

“She’s impossible!” April took a deep breath, steadying herself, trying to ignore just how deeply annoying she found it that Blair somehow managed to push her buttons, over and over. “Every time I think I understand her, _every time_ , she pulls a stunt like that. It’s like she thrives on chaos. Driving me crazy is just a delicious side-effect.” 

“I know you feel that way, and—don’t tell Blair I told you this—you probably have a point?” Sterling made a face, uncomfortable with accepting that Blair was anything other than the fiercest, most loyal sister anyone could ever hope for. ”But she’s really trying. Also, I figured… since you’re already coming over, maybe you and Blair could, like, talk?” 

“I can’t make any promises.” 

“All I ask is that you try. Blair is trying, so it only feels fair that you do the same. For me?” 

“For you? Anything,” April stated, before catching herself, realizing that was exactly the words Sterling used yesterday. She could feel her cheeks beginning to heat up as a deep blush started to appear. 

“And if Blair ends up being, well, Blair... I’ll make it up to you,” Sterling said and sealed the promise with a kiss, before walking off to her next class, leaving April standing there, her ears red and burning. 

***************************** 

Sterling was having a hard time focusing on her homework. It was Friday and her brain had checked out, refusing to focus on school the moment April walked into her house. She knew she would be unable to get any homework done, so to convince April to join her on the couch, she argued that doing homework on Sunday was just as acceptable. April’s counter was much stronger, stating that the more they got done tonight, the more time they would have to do _other things_ over the weekend. 

As always, April made a fair point. 

Her concentration completely went out the window when she chanced a glance over at her girlfriend. April sat quietly beside her, twirling her hair between her fingers as she read over some notes she had taken during class. She stopped twisting her hair long enough to highlight a few pertinent points then went back to reading, never once looking in Sterling’s direction. Even though Sterling was fairly sure April could feel her focus being solely on her. 

The corner of April’s lips ticked upward, but she kept her eyes on the page. “You’re staring.” 

Sterling snapped from her haze. Her cheeks flushed pink. “I was not.” 

April snorted a small laugh as she highlighted another line. “Okay. Keep telling yourself that.” 

Sterling leaned forward, placing her book down on the coffee table. She reached out and took April’s notes from her hand, ignoring the protesting look she received. “Babe, it’s Friday night,” she noted, smiling as she shifted closer to April. She rested her arm on the back of the couch practically boxing April in. “We have the house to ourselves—“ 

“We are not alone,” April reminded, doing little in protest when Sterling inched closer. Her girlfriend’s mouth was so close, she could feel her breath against her lips. She attempted to speak, but her voice did an odd crack that brought an embarrassed burn to the tips of her ears. She cleared her throat and tried again. “Your sister’s here.” 

Sterling shrugged her shoulder and moved in for a kiss. 

“I’m here and I’m downstairs now so please stop,” Blair interrupted, chuckling when Sterling jumped back from April. 

April inhaled deeply and rolled her eyes as she adjusted her position on the couch closer to Sterling. Blair spared her a quick glance then tossed her notebook down onto the coffee table and plopped down in her father’s usual chair. She sat sideways, dangling her feet over the edge as she regarded the two sharing a couch. 

Blair raised an eyebrow. “You seriously consider doing homework a date?” 

April pressed her teeth hard into her bottom lips trying not to say the first response that came into her mind. She relaxed when Sterling’s arm draped around her shoulders. She poked out the tip of her tongue, carefully choosing her next words. “It’s better to get ahead on some things,” she answered calmly with a small smile. 

“We’re going to watch a movie later,” Sterling chimed in, rubbing her hand up and down April’s arm. “You should join us.” She stopped her movement, lightly tapping her thumb against her girlfriend’s skin. 

April knew exactly what Sterling was doing. Her touch was a signal, silently asking her to support her invitation. She exhaled, exasperated, shifting against Sterling. “Yes, Blair, you should join us.” 

Blair squinted, her brown eyes shifting from one girl to the next. She locked eyes with April once again. “Why do I feel like that was a forced invite?” 

“It wasn’t,” April defended, mirroring her expression. 

“You sure?” 

“Yes.” 

“Hey, how about we order some dinner?” Sterling interjected, trying to break up the staring contest. She reached for her phone. “What are you all in the mood for? 

Blair and April both looked back and forth nervously, neither willing to throw out the first suggestion, clearly suspicious of what kind of response it would garner from the other. Sterling just shook her head, marveling at how stupidly contentious something as mundane as food preferences could become when there were years of tension coloring everything between two people. 

Sterling thought about it for a second before offering up her own opinion. “I for sure wouldn’t mind some tasty pizza, but that’s just me and movie nights. I always associate them with pizza.” 

April visibly froze, and Sterling cursed herself silently before deciding that the only way out this particular quagmire was through, so she barreled ahead: “How about Italian? Greek? Indian? Chinese? Korean? Mexican? Thai?” Sterling threw out suggestion after suggestion, taking them on a truly globetrotting food journey, but no takers so far. “Sushi? BBQ? Danish?” 

“Like the pastry?” Blair asked, finally breaking her silence. 

“No, the _country_. We can’t have Danishes for dinner.” Sterling considered this for a moment. “Or can we?” 

"I'd allow it. We've had ice cream for dinner before. That's not exactly a healthy option in the long term either." 

“What even is Danish food if not the pastries?” 

“I don’t know, but I’m sure it’s actually delicious. Most regional dishes are,” Blair stated. 

“You know what, Blair? For once I agree with you,” April said, finally adding to the conversation. 

“Not surstro-surstre-sur.” Sterling floundered, trying to remember the pronunciation of a foreign word she’d only heard once, in a video Luke had shown her on his phone. “Whatever it’s called. It sounded so gross.” 

“At this point, I would wolf down cardboard.” 

“If you don’t mind trying something new, I know of a great Ethiopian place,” April suggested. 

“Ethiopian? 

“If you make that joke from _When Harry Met Sally_ you will be eating cardboard,” Sterling glowered at her sister. 

“I was being sincere! I’ve never had it. What’s it like, April?” 

“Really flavorful. It can get pretty spicy though,” April explained, taking note of Blair’s waggling eyebrows out of the corner of her eyes. “Shut up, Blair.” 

She just laughed in response. “So, you like spicy food?’ 

“I do. I’d love a curry hot enough to melt your face.“ 

In response to this, Blair made a face of her own, one of disgust. “You probably order Vindaloo every chance you get.” 

“Yes!” April’s face lit up and she clapped happily. “It’s _so_ good. I haven’t quite managed to convince Sterl to try it just yet, but I know I’ll get to her eventually.” 

“You don’t say,” Blair snickered. 

Sterling closed her eyes. They were doing so well until now, but Blair couldn’t seem to stop herself. “Be nice.” 

“What? I’m just saying that you, my sweet darling sister, seem very open to suggestions… when April’s the one making them. I just don’t get food that spicy. It’s just… _blech_." The disgusted face made a reappearance. "I want my food to be tasty, not have it assault me from the moment I take a bite.” 

“Trying new things is good though. I’m not sure I’ll like Vindaloo, but I’d like to try it before I say I don’t.” 

“And it’s not like you start with the spiciest item on the menu,” April filled in, taking over from Sterling. “You don’t order Five-Alarm Chili if you’ve only had mac ‘n’ cheese for the entirety your life.” 

“Fine! Then we’re all in agreement. Tonight, we’ll try something new.” Sterling concluded as she asked April, “Do you know if they deliver?” 

“It’s a really small, family-run restaurant, so no, they don’t deliver, unfortunately.” 

“Hang on, let me just open DoorDash and see if they’re on there.” 

“Sterling! No!” Blair was clearly upset, switching over in an instant to righteous anger mode, ranting furiously. “Didn’t you hear what April just said? Small. Family-run. The gig economy is a blight on society, and those apps are the bane of restaurants everywhere. You end up paying more while they make less, just so some Silicon Valley tech bro can live his dream of becoming the next Bezos or Zuckerberg. No. No way.” She turned the outrage dial back down, composed herself, and turned to April: “Do they have a menu online we can check?” 

“Yes, but I just can recommend you the best dishes. I’ve sampled most of their menu.” 

“Fine, I’ll drive over there,” Sterling said. “You stay here and call in the order. I trust you to get me something I’ll like,” she continued, nodding at April, giving her girlfriend a loving look. 

April smiled back, already going over menu options in her mind. “Are you sure? They, uh, they know me there.” 

“Then I'm sure they’ll recognize you over the phone as well and treat me like royalty when I show up to pick up food for _the_ April Stevens,” she said with a laugh before turning to Blair. “Where are the keys to the Volt? You drove it last.” 

“Uh, shoot, I think they’re in the kitchen. I’ll find them.” She jumped out of the chair and sprinted off. 

Sterling gave April a nudge. “Come on, we need to help her, or we won’t be eating until tomorrow.” She stood up and waited for April to follow suit so she could wrap her arms around her girlfriend, waddling them into the kitchen, not far behind Blair. 

Blair was busy flinging papers all across the kitchen, not caring one bit about the mess she left behind. “I know I had them when I was—” she stopped abruptly, thinking for a second before continuing her narration: “Or maybe it was after we went to—aha! There they are!” She tossed the keys to Sterling. “Told you they were in the kitchen.” 

“I’ve never been more surprised than when you remember where a set of keys are.” 

“I know!” Blair glowed. “It’s been an evening filled with surprises. Really. I mean heck April, _you_ , a regular at an Ethiopian place? Honestly, no offense, but how did you turn into a Vindaloo-loving _spice lord_? 

April stiffened, her features suddenly growing cold. "I can have an appreciation for a wide variety of food from all over the world. Being from the south doesn't have to mean I just eat grits." 

Despite the playful banter and jovial mood being murdered by April’s sudden shift, Sterling moved towards the door. “So, I’ll just go then. I’ll be back as soon as humanly possible.” 

Blair stared at her sister. “Sterling.” 

“ASAP. It’ll be fine. Twin swear,” she said, walking through the door as she watched a sullen April grab the phone to call the restaurant. 

Blair’s stare turned into a glare when the door closed, leaving her standing alone in the kitchen with an April that didn’t seem interested in anything to do with her girlfriend’s sister any more. Unsure of what to do, Blair just stood there, watching April closely, hoping she’d snap back to the mood she’d been in just moments earlier. 

When nothing happened, she sighed and shrugged. “Hey, April, it’s going to be a while. We might as well get comfy.” 

Returning to the living room, Blair flopped down on the couch April and Sterling previously occupied. She spread herself out, taking up as much space as possible, her head comfortably on the arm rest. April slapped her hands lightly against her side, surmising Blair’s previous seat was now hers. She sat down, almost too stiffly for her own liking, and rested her hands on her lap. 

The silence around them was thick, but not suffocating. Still, April felt like she should say something. Blair wasn’t really a bad person. They simply didn’t have much in common, something which had been obvious since the fifth grade. There was only one thing in both of their lives that was constant and connected them: Sterling. 

They had to try for Sterling. 

April turned her head, scratching anxiously at the base of her neck. Now the silence started to get deafening. She looked over at Blair, noticing her focus was toward the ceiling. Her cheeks were puffed out and she seemed to be passing air back and forth between her mouth. She tossed one of her mother’s throw pillows up in the air, playing catching by herself. 

April sighed, sitting back in the chair. Someone had to speak soon. As soon as she opened her mouth, Blair, apparently feeling the same, decided to snatch the initiative right from under her. 

“Sterl’s been gone for a while,” Blair muttered, more to the room than anything. She tossed the pillow up into the air again then caught it coming down. 

April turned her wrist, checking the time. “She’s been gone for ten minutes.” She settled her hand on the arm rest, giving it a comforting squeeze. “Albeit it feels longer.” 

Blair slowly turned her head, smirking at April. “Albeit? You couldn’t just say although?” 

April rolled her eyes. “Forgive me for having a strong vocabulary.” 

Now it was Blair’s turn to roll her eyes. “You two really are perfect for each other.” She turned her attention back to the ceiling and tossed the pillow up. “She’s a horrible driver, you know. Our food is going to end up splattered all over the insides of the car long before she gets back.” 

“You’re one to talk,” April scoffed, chuckling quietly. “Didn’t you run over the curb on your way out of school the other day?” 

Blair smirked. “No.” She looked at April again, a cocky expression on her face. “That was all Sterling.” 

April drew her brow together as she remembered that day. Her jaw slacked and Blair laughed watching the truth register across her face. “I could have sworn that was you.” 

Blair shook her head. “Nope. Sterl was in a rush to get to the mall and she just—“ her hand shot straight up “—took out the curb.” 

“Oh my God.” April placed her hand over her face. “She’s a disaster.” 

“You’re just now figuring this out?” 

April moved her hand quickly and shot Blair a look. “Hey, be nice! That’s my girlfriend.” 

Blair turned her head just as quickly, matching her look. “That’s my sister. My _twin_ sister.” 

They held eye contact for a brief moment before releasing simultaneous sighs, indicating a détente being reached. 

Blair sat up, crossing her legs underneath her. “Listen, April, I’m really sorry… about the whole fireplace thing.” She clutched the pillow against her chest and shrugged, sheepishly. “You’re really easy to aggravate and sometimes I can’t help myself.” She extended her index finger. “And I really was cold.” 

April nodded, slowly. “Perhaps… I may have… overreacted.” 

Blair raised an eyebrow, silently challenging April’s description of her behavior. 

“Okay, fine. I overreacted,” April admitted, reluctantly. She sat up slightly, prepared to defend her next point. “But, you really could have caused a lot of damage.” 

“I know, I know.” Blair raised her hand. “It won’t happen again.” 

“Then all is forgiven,” April responded, offering her a small, genuine smile. She looked down at her hands momentarily, fidgeting with the tips of her fingers. “I don’t mean to be such a—“ 

“Bitch?” Blair suggested, but there was a lightness to her tone indicating she was joking. 

April narrowed her eyes, shooting her a mock glare. “Perfectionist,” she corrected as she continued to fidget with her nails. “My whole life,“ she paused, taking a moment to keep her voice steady, “my father really put a lot of pressure on everything I did.” She shifted from side to side, trying to make herself more comfortable during her uncomfortable confession. “There was no room for error with John. Everything had to be a certain way and—“ she sighed, shaking her head. “It’s really hard to break free of that kind of… _conditioning_.” 

Blair pursed her lips, sympathy filling her expression. She sat quietly, waiting patiently for April to finish. 

“When you asked me earlier about spicy food, I... I was reminded of him.” April huffed as the incident with her father replayed in her mind. “We took a trip when I was younger, going to help our church spread the word of Christ in a foreign land, and I got to try the most amazing food I'd ever had. But once we got home, I was never allowed it again, because god forbid anybody found out that I liked anything about that 'third-world hellhole'—those were the exact words he used in private. He didn't care about helping anybody, he only cared about how it made him appear. Appearance was everything. And if I wasn't perfect, it reflected badly on him, on Team Stevens." 

Blair looked disgusted. “Well, John Stevens is an asshole, and he shouldn’t have put that kind of pressure on you. The amount of stress you must've been under... it’s not fair.” 

April nodded, ignoring the way her chest tightened remembering the pain her father caused her. Caused everyone. “You’re right. It’s not, but it’s over now.” She shrugged her shoulder. “And I’m trying to be a less stressed-out person. For myself. For Sterling.” 

“That was you less stressed-out?” Blair mouthed the word ‘wow’ and shook her head. 

April chuckled. “No, that was me not listening to my new self." She bowed her head in contrition. "And I’m sorry.” 

“It’s all good. We can just keep moving past it.” She waved her hand, solidifying her point. “From here on out, I will try and be a better—“ a Cheshire cat grin crossed her face “—sister-in-law.” 

April blushed instantly, averting her eyes from Blair. “Your sister and I aren’t married,” she muttered, clearing her throat. “You shouldn’t throw terms like those around lightly.” 

Blair shrugged, tossing the pillow aside as she stood from the couch. “One day it’ll be warranted.” She chuckled quietly when April’s face flushed an even deeper shade of red. She thrust her thumb toward the kitchen. “I’m gonna grab a drink. You want something?” 

“That would be great. Thanks.” 

“No problem. Be right back.” 

They shared an understanding nod before Blair disappeared back into the kitchen… 

**************************************** 

After Sterling returned with the food, Blair told Sterling that she and April officially signed a peace treaty. She promised everything would be great between the three of them from now on and Sterling wrapped them both up with an enthusiastic hug. They sat down around the kitchen table and had a nice meal together and decided what movie to watch. 

Sterling was proud of herself for only choking once due to surprising spiciness, even though it was completely her own fault. She thought sharing food with her girlfriend would be a cute couple thing to do. April even warned her about the spice level of her meal, so it shouldn’t have been surprising at all, but Sterling didn’t listen, and shoved way too much into her mouth way too fast. Luckily, April was there to keep her from choking to death, but the way she and Blair kept laughing about the whole situation felt uncalled for. As far as Sterling was concerned, at least. 

When their meal was done, they made their way back into the living room and settled back down on the couch. Blair joined them this time, taking a seat on April’s right. Sterling opened HULU after they agreed to give their new holiday movie a shot. Blair complained about sitting through an hour and forty-five minutes of Kristen Stewart, but quieted down when Sterling promised to watch whatever gory horror classic she wanted to next time. 

Sterling pulled a blanket she had brought down from her bedroom over herself and April as the smaller girl cuddled into her side, wrapping her arm around Sterling’s midsection. She placed a small kiss on April’s forehead, disregarding the sound of her sister’s playful gag from the other side of her girlfriend. 

They were about twenty minutes into the movie when Blair shifted closer to April. Sterling furrowed her brow, curiously watching her sister as she rested her chin on April’s shoulder. 

“Hey, April,” Blair half-whispered, squinting when April didn’t look at her. “I’m cold, can you cuddle with me?” 

April made a face and scoffed. “No,” she responded, keeping her eyes focused on the screen. It wasn’t long before a half-smile pulled onto her lips and she lifted the blanket, silently inviting Blair to join them. 

Blair made a noise that sounded somewhat excited and she scooted closer to April, snuggling against her side as she rested her head against her shoulder. Sterling watched the interaction, her blue eyes shifting between her sister and her girlfriend. 

“You really need to tell me what you and Blair talked about while I was gone,” Sterling whispered, placing another kiss against her forehead. 

April inched back so she could see her face more clearly. Blair whined at the shift and April half-rolled her eyes. Clearly, Sterling wasn't the only twin who could be ridiculous. She reached up and touched Sterling’s chin. “Let’s just say, your sister and I are going to be really good friends now.” 

Sterling raised an eyebrow. “Just friends?” 

April smirked, pulling Sterling in for a chaste kiss before returning her attention to the screen. Blair snuggled back into April and Sterling eyed them skeptically as they kept their focus on the movie, completely disregarding Sterling’s question. 

“Hey! I’m serious... Just friends, right?”


	5. "So You're Going to Dress Up as Santa"

Sterling grumbled as she checked the time on her phone again. They were supposed to leave for the mall twenty minutes ago. Blair promised they would get the bulk of their shopping done today. Including helping her find the perfect gift for April. Not like she hadn’t been doing that exact same thing all night. 

Even after scrolling through website after website, Sterling still couldn’t find anything that even came close to the sentiment behind her original idea. She spent most of her internet adventure looking at the significance behind different types of stones. Maybe she could find a stone where the implication wasn’t too heavy. That would make the gift meaningful but not put any pressure on their future. 

Her phone vibrated against her lap and she prayed it was a message from Blair saying she was on her way down. She brought her phone into view and realized the name flashing across the screen was even better than she had hoped for. She sat up straighter, running her fingers through her hair making sure nothing was out of place. 

A huge smile formed on her lips as she slid her thumb across the screen. The screen illuminated and April’s beautiful face filled the screen. “Hey, babe,” she greeted, blowing her a small kiss. “I thought you were going out with your mom?” 

“I am,” April replied, an adoring smile gracing her perfect lips. “Just wanted to say hi and that I can’t wait to see you later.” 

“Aw, babe,” Sterling cooed, resting her hand on her chest. “I can’t wait to see you.” 

April chuckled quietly and there was a faint blush on her cheeks. She cocked her head to the side as her eyes danced over the screen. “Are you still home? I thought you’d be at the mall by now.” 

“Blair is taking _forever_ ,” Sterling groaned, slumping back against the couch. “We have so much we need to cross off our list today.” 

“It’s so sexy that you have a list.” 

Sterling scrunched her brow, flashing a half-grin. “Takes very little to impress you where I’m concerned, huh?” 

April laughed, and Sterling felt her body tingle at the sound. “Well, what can I say? You’re everything.” 

Sterling blushed. “You’re in a flirtatious mood.” 

April shrugged, flashing the half-smirk Sterling adored. “It must be because I can’t wait for our one-on-one time. Since Blair crashed our date night.” 

“She didn’t crash our date, she was invited. And it seemed like you didn’t mind,” Sterling noted, a bit of playful jealousy laced her tone. 

“You’re a much better cuddler,” April assured her, tossing her a wink. 

Sterling snorted a laugh. “Good to know.” The sound of heavy footsteps on the stairs drew her attention. Blair stepped through the doorway looking like she was still half asleep. She grinned at the sight of her sister then met April’s eyes again. “Speaking of your second favorite cuddler, guess who finally decided to come downstairs?” 

Blair made a face. “Second favorite?” She took a seat on the arm rest closest to Sterling and took the phone from her hand. “You wound me, Stevens.” 

“You’ll get over it,” April replied, giving her a closed mouth smile. 

Sterling took the phone back from her sister. “Okay, babe, we’re going to go. Have fun with your mom.” 

“I’ll do my best. I’ll see you tonight.” April blew her a kiss followed by a bright smile. “I love you.” 

Sterling mirrored her expression. “I love you more.” 

“And I love you most. Now let’s go,” Blair ordered as she leaned into Sterling. “Later, Stevens.” 

“Later, second favorite,” April responded, sarcastically. 

Blair took in dramatic, mock offended gasp. “You sound like my mom.” 

“Blair!” Sterling scolded, slapping her sister’s arm. Blair grinned mischievously as she hopped off the arm rest and motioned toward the door. Sterling turned her attention to April again. “Bye, babe.” 

“Have fun! Bye, honey.” 

*************************** 

They’d been shopping for over two hours and Sterling was no closer to finding a gift for April. Their parents were easy. Bowser and Yolanda even easier. But April. It was like trying to find a pretty pink needle in a really large haystack. By the time they reached the fifth store Sterling knew April enjoyed shopping in, her gifting brain was fried. 

The only thing that was keeping her from completely throwing in the shopping towel was Blair’s promise that they could take a picture with Santa. It was one of Sterling’s favorite things about holiday shopping and all she had to do for it to happen was make a decent size dent in their shopping list. Which they had. The only hurdle they hadn’t crossed was what to get for her dear, sweet girlfriend. 

“Hey, can we stop by Da Vinci’s Donuts after we leave here?” Blair asked, turning her nose up at a particularly unattractive shirt on the rack. 

“Was that smoothie earlier not enough for you?” Sterling questioned, sighing at the sight of yet another not perfect item. 

Blair shrugged, stepping away from the rack and over to a table of shirts. “Yeah, but I really want that cinnamon roll donut.” She picked up a shirt and unfolded it to check the design. “It sucks that there’s no Cinnabon in this mall.” Her brow furrowed and she clutched the shirt to her chest as she turned to Sterling. “You don’t think it’s weird that your girlfriend doesn’t like cinnamon rolls?” 

The corner of Sterling’s mouth turned up at the mention of April. “No, everyone has a right to not like something.” 

“Yeah, but cinnamon rolls?” Blair made a disgruntled noise. “They’re amazing and she needs to reevaluate that.” She attempted to fold the shirt and placed the item back down on the table. She snapped her fingers suddenly. “Oh! We need to stop at Sunglass Hut. I want to get dad a new pair of sunglasses.” The brunette wrinkled her nose. “I am so done with him looking like a retired FBI agent.” 

“Mhmm,” Sterling responded, absentmindedly as she placed a shirt back on the rack in frustration. 

Blair eyed her sister curiously. “Dude, what is with you?” 

“Nothing.” 

“Lies.” 

Sterling groaned, tossing her head back. “Trying to find something for April is driving me crazy.” 

Blair sighed, taking hold of Sterling’s wrist and leading her out of the store. “You need to stop stressing about this.” She yanked her sister around the corner, stopping by a less crowded section of the mall. “She’s your girlfriend. Buying her a gift shouldn’t be this hard.” 

“Well, it wouldn’t be if you hadn’t drilled it into my head how special our first Christmas needs to be.” Sterling waved her arms animatedly as she spoke. “Now everything I look at isn’t good enough and I don’t know what I’m going to do because I know she’s already gotten me a gift and—“ 

“Okay, okay.” Blair grabbed her sister’s arms, pinning them to her sides, to calm her down. She locked eyes with her. “We’ll figure this out.” She slowly released Sterling and took a step back. Her eyes lit up suddenly. “Victoria’s Secret.” The brunette slapped her hands together like she had just discovered a cure for some fatal disease. “Boom. Done.” 

“I am not giving April anything from Victoria’s Secret for Christmas.” 

Blair hummed, tapping her chin. “You’re right. That’s more of a Valentine’s Day thing.” 

Sterling flushed at the thought of buying her girlfriend lingerie on any holiday. “No, Blair, not even on Valentine’s Day.” She sighed, scrubbing her hand across her face. “Let’s just—keep looking.” 

They strolled further down the mall and Sterling could not find one store that caught her attention. Not one window display. Not one holiday-decorated storefront. Nothing. Until she came upon a jewelry store on the corner of the mall and they stepped inside. 

“Man, I don’t know about this mall. I think your problem finding something for April stems from just how dull and bland everything is. You’ve heard of Performative Christianity?“ 

“We all have. His name is John Stevens,” Sterling responded as she moved from case to case, admiring the jewelry and trinkets inside. 

Blair paused in thought for a moment. “Oh. Yeah. Right.” She shook her head, continuing on her rant. “This is like Performative Christmas Festivity. Nobody here has anything resembling Christmas Spirit. Not even close. They’re all in it for the money.“ 

Sterling stopped, lightly slapping her hand down on the glass. “Blair, don’t. You know I like Christmas.“ 

“Dude, I like Christmas too. I’m not immune. Maybe I don’t like it as much as you do, you’re a regular Christmas fiend, but I like Christmas just fine. This—” she motioned around the room as if everyone shopping was part of a display “—this isn’t Christmas. This is the machine telling us, ‘spend, spend, spend’. The crass commercialism of 21st century Christmas is appalling.“ 

Sterling furrowed her brow as she continued perusing the merchandise. “I like that ad with the couple who—” 

“Name it. Tell me anything specific about what they’re selling.” Blair crossed her arms against her chest, raising her brow expectantly. 

Sterling exhaled, exasperated. “They’re not selling anything. It’s just a—” 

“So, they’re tugging on your heartstrings. Manipulating you into forging a positive connection with their brand.” 

Sterling paused again, rolling her eyes. “Blair, Christmas is a nice time of year. Can’t you let it be just that? It’s all about family and friends coming together and—” 

“So not about the birth of a very special little boy in Bethlehem?” She snickered. “This is what I mean. You love it. All of it. Every sappy little detail.” 

“I won’t deny it. Christmas makes me happy. Watching the faces of children light up when they get to meet Santa. Christmas Mass. Waking up on Christmas morning. Mariah Carey’s Christmas album.” She glared at Blair. “Don’t you dare. That album is a Christmas classic.” 

Blair held up her hands defensively. “I don’t mind some sappy Christmas music in my diet, however, this neutered, muzakified version of Little Drummer Boy is an abomination though.“ 

Sterling knitted her brow with a huff. “Has there ever been a good version of that song?” 

“I know one or two. I’ll add them to your Christmas music playlist.” 

Sterling halted her steps, stopping in front of a display case filled with a beautiful display of gleaming bands. No matter how hard she tried to veer away from this particular gift idea, she found herself being pulled back. Maybe a promise ring wasn’t the wrong idea. Someone was obviously telling her that this was it. 

This was the perfect gift. 

“A ring?” Blair asked, raising an eyebrow. A sly grin crossed her lips as she eyed her sister skeptically. “Are you seriously thinking about buying her a ring?” 

“No,” Sterling defended, clearing the crack out of her throat. “I was-looking-at-a bracelet.” 

Blair narrowed her eyes disbelievingly. She pressed her index finger against the top of the glass case. “These are _rings_ , Sterl,” she stated, tapping the glass. “They look nothing like bracelets.” 

Sterling straightened trying to look as confident in her argument as possible. “Then maybe they should label things correctly so mistakes like this don’t happen.” She grabbed Blair’s hand, cutting off the comment she knew was coming. “Come on. There’s nothing here.” 

Blair chuckled, shaking her head as she allowed herself to be led out of the store. 

“Can we please go visit Santa now? You know how much it means to me to get a picture with him.” 

Blair relented. “Yeah, sure, let’s try to end this little mall adventure of ours on a happier note.” 

Sterling practically yelped and took off, heading straight for the booth where Santa was hiding, slaloming between startled shoppers. When she reached her target, she saw a diminutive girl dressed as an elf manning a desk with a... check-in sign, sitting upon it. Sterling didn’t let this deter her. “Hi, I’m here for a photo with Santa.” 

“Aren’t you a bit old for this?” the elf chuckled. 

“You’re never too old for Santa,” Sterling stated calmly. 

“Alright then. What time did you book for?” 

“What?” 

“Your appointment. With Santa,” she specified sweetly, as if she was also in charge of the appointment book for Jack Skellington, The Grinch, and Ebeneezer Scrooge. 

“You need an _appointment_?” Sterling asked incredulously, confusion filling her face. She looked around, realizing she was the only other person there. There was no line, no children being fussed over. Just her, the very nice, patient lady in front of her and Christmas Muzak being played over the mall PA system.” 

“Yes, and if you’d checked ahead, you would’ve found all this info on the mall website. Including a link to make reservations. Maybe you should’ve had your parents do it for you.” 

Sterling didn’t really think the lady was being all that nice any longer. She felt like she was being talked down to. 

“You don’t understand, it’s vital that I get a photo with Santa.” 

“And you’re welcome to make a reservation. Or you can wait around to see if a spot opens up.” 

“Is that a possibility?” 

“Not really, no. Sorry.” 

Sterling turned around and walked back to Blair. This really was a waste of a mall adventure. 

****************************** 

Sterling rang the doorbell at 7PM on the dot, knowing how April felt about tardiness. When the door opened, she was greeted by her girlfriend looking surprisingly... not ready, her hair a tangled mess, with clothes crumpled and disheveled like she'd thrown them on in a hurry, just moments before. 

“You look beautiful,” Sterling said, meaning it completely and utterly. 

April narrowed her eyes. “And you’re an adorable liar, but thank you all the same.” She stepped aside, ushering Sterling into the house. “Come in. I’m not quite ready yet. Obviously. So, how was your day at the mall?” she queried before giving Sterling a quick kiss and hurrying off to finish getting ready for their Blair-less date. 

Sterling walked behind her, trying to keep up. “It was okay, I guess,” she fibbed, not wanting to let on just how frustratingly impossible she found it to pick out a gift for the cute brunette with honeyed hair she was currently gawking at. “Blair was giving me a lecture about how Christmas is empty and meaningless. I think that’s what she was getting at.” 

“That certainly sounds like your twin,” April laughed and spun around to face her adorable girlfriend, running a brush through her hair. “Did anything else fun happen?” 

“Fun? No, definitely not... I can’t believe I didn’t get to have my picture taken with Santa.” 

“Isn’t that a kid thing?” 

“Why do you say that?” 

“Oh, I don’t know, because the line is always filled with excited children and their exasperated parents who have about a million things they could, and should, be doing instead?” 

Sterling nibbled on her lower lip, thinking back to last year. April had a point, but she didn’t have to admit that. “I wouldn’t know. There was no line.” 

“No line? Wasn’t it busy? I thought you said you didn’t get a picture with Santa.” 

“They’ve started taking appointments ahead of time, so you just schedule a time online and when you get there you can just walk right in. It seemed very… efficient.” 

“Sounds like you disapprove.” 

“Yes! Because of this, I didn’t get to have my picture taken with Santa! Plus, the line is part of the experience. Waiting for your turn, the anticipation building, figuring out what you’re going to ask for. Last year—” 

“Hold on.” April marveled. “You did this last year too?” 

“Of course. I’ve done it every year for as long as I can remember. It’s a Christmas tradition.” 

“You’ve made a Christmas tradition out of climbing into some strange guy’s lap?” 

“April! There’s no climbing involved. None what-so-ever. I just sit down briefly, have an even briefer chat and I get a picture of me with Santa out of it. There’s nothing _skeezy_ about it.” 

“Skeezy is a perfect word to describe a teenage girl sitting in a stranger’s lap. Weird works too. Creepy.” 

“What? April, stop it!” Sterling sounded appalled. “This is Santa we’re talking about. Father Christmas. What could ever be creepy about Santa?” 

April pinched the bridge of her nose. “I… I have no words.” 

“I love Christmas! And Santa is the personification of everything Christmas. He’s jolly. He wears red. I know you consider red a Christmassy color.” 

Blair wasn’t kidding when she had described her sister as a ‘Christmas fiend’. April should’ve realized the accuracy of this statement after witnessing Sterling’s reaction to a broken slipper, of all things. She saw no other recourse than steering this conversation back onto a slightly less frantic track; they could argue Santa and the inherent insanity of the holiday season another day. Ah. “You could always go back another day.” 

Sterling slumped down against the side of April’s bed, looking dejected. “They said they were booked solid for the next ten days. By the time they had an opening available, we’ll be in the middle of midterms and swamped, so so swamped.” 

“We’re already swamped, between my duties as chair of the Willingham Christmas Party Planning Committee—” 

“That remains quite a mouthful,” Sterling pointed out. 

“You’re right, I can acknowledge that. I just thought that making it sound official would make it important. Or at least seem important. I don’t know why I expected that would ever prevent the rest of you from just goofing around.” 

“I would never goof around.” 

“No,” April smiled. “But you also _like_ doing what I tell you. Apparently I’m a perfect fit for your dopamine receptors.” 

“April Stevens,” Sterling beamed, “are you trying to talk dirty to me?” 

April turned her back to Sterling, pretending like it made sense that she was going through her underwear drawer. “What if? That was no more ridiculous than you talking about your maxilla.” 

“Because I think you’re a perfect fit for me in so many ways, _so so many ways_ , some that are far sexier than dopamine receptors.” 

“Save it for our date.” 

“Oh, I’m fully considering this part of our date. We’re together, and alone. In your room.” 

“Don’t you want your picture with Santa?” April said, turning her desk chair so it faced Sterling and sat down. 

“I don’t think that’s going to happen. At least not this year. I guess I’ll have to make sure to make reservations next Christmas.” 

“What if... what if we made it happen?” 

"Does this mean—so you're going to dress up as Santa. For me?" 

"If that's what it takes for me to finally get you into my lap for a change," April said and sat up straight, patting her thighs softly, laughing when Sterling's eyes widened. 

"Santa, though? I don't know, I always think of you as more of an elf," Sterling said, her tongue fully logged in her cheek. Metaphorically, because it was actually poking out of her mouth in an impish grin. 

“You’re lucky I love you.” 

“Yep, the luckiest,” Sterling nodded, a big grin plastered on her face. 

“Then take this into consideration, if I’m Santa, you would be my favored elf. I bet you’d look really cute as an elf. Even when wearing that outfit.” 

“And what exactly would I be wearing?” Sterling asked, the look she gave April eager and curious. 

“Oh, you'd look so cute all in green with a pointy red collar, a belt pulling the fabric tight to your—” April swallowed. ”And those striped leggings would... do things.” 

“You should be a fashion designer." 

“Your head would be adorned with a little red crown. The kind that flops down instead of standing straight up.” 

Sterling made a face. “Now it almost sounds like you’re describing a Court Jester.” 

“Which would make me the Queen you have to please. Would that be so bad?” 

Sterling shook her head and pulled herself off the floor. “Not at all. Not as long as my queen is willing to accept some very bad puns and behavior that maybe not the entire court should be privy to.” 

“I’m not sure I understand what you mean.” 

“Allow me to demonstrate, my Queen,” Sterling murmured, stepping closer to April, languorously climbing into her lap. She wrapped her arms around the shorter girl, coming to an abrupt stop as she felt April’s head smush against her, cradled far further down Sterling's body than would ever be conducive to any kind of heated make-out session. 

April wrinkled her nose disapprovingly at their current position. “Yeah, this is weird.” 

“Doesn’t really work, does it?” 

“Not unless you have a thing for kissing the top of my head.” 

“Actually, now that you mention it…”


	6. "You're so immature!"

“You’re not joining us for brunch today?” Lynn Creswell asked as what remained of the Stevens family made their way towards the exit of the church. 

“I’m afraid not. April and I have some things that we need to take care of around the house. It’s been a lot of work, I’ll have you know, but my girl has been a rock.” 

“She is a special one indeed,” Lynn agreed, but her smile was forced, never quite reaching her eyes. 

It didn’t take a mind reader to understand what she actually meant when she called April special, but Mrs. Stevens refused to acknowledge the jab. “You can say that again. The way she and Sterling have been around to help me through these troubled times. Well, it’s been wonderful to be surrounded by the light real love brings forth.” 

She knew it wasn’t very Christian of her, but Mrs. Stevens took great delight in how Lynn Creswell blanched when she brought up her daughter’s girlfriend. “We have to get going, but you enjoy your tea now!” 

April walked up and linked arms with her mother. “Ready to go, mom?” 

“Absolutely. Let’s get out of here,” she agreed, placing her hand on her daughter’s arm, giving it an affectionate and reassuring squeeze. 

April nodded and turned to Sterling, blowing her a quick kiss and gesturing to her to call later. As if that was needed. She would probably feel her phone buzz before they even reached the parking lot. April smiled, walking tall next to her mother, feeling almost giddy. She had only caught the tail end of her mother’s conversation with Lynn Creswell but hearing her talk frankly about her and Sterling’s love for each other without hesitation left April with a lump in her throat. 

“So, mom, where do you want to go for brunch?” April couldn’t stop the giggling that was building in her chest. She felt light, relieved how her mother handled everything, including little white lies about chores and responsibilities that would allow them to take the car and drive off for some mother-daughter time in private, away from the church that used to dominate their Sundays. So, she giggled, like they were about to do something naughty. 

“Away from judgement and prying eyes,” came Mrs. Stevens’ blunt reply. 

Now that they were out from underneath the roof of the church, ensconced in the safety of their own car, Mrs. Stevens bristled at the nerve of that woman, trying to imply that the love she had seen between April and Sterling should be shunned, hidden away. She’d experienced first-hand how a life hidden away from the world at large could end up, and she would never allow such deceit to be part of her life again. 

“Does Four Seasons sound okay?” 

“I think I’m in the mood for something more relaxed. How about Einstein’s? On Juniper, not the bagel place.” 

“Einstein’s?” April asked to double-check as she started entering the details into the navigation system. 

“Yes, I’m told they’re _relatively_ good,” she clucked. 

April looked over at her mom and shook her head. 

“Just because I’m your mother it doesn’t mean I can’t make dad jokes,” Mrs. Stevens said before immediately regretting her words. “Oh, sweetie, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to—” 

“Mom, no, it’s okay,” April said, reaching for her mother. “It was just a really bad pun.” 

*********************** 

They walked through the front doors of Einstein’s and were greeted by an energetic young man already reaching for a pair of menus. “Hi, I’m Trev. Brunch for two?” 

“That’s right.” 

“If you’ll follow me, I can help you find a table. Brunch can get pretty busy.” 

“That’s perfectly fine,” April’s mother stated. “That’s exactly why we chose to come here.” 

“Mom?” April looked at her mother, not fully understanding her reasoning. 

“Yes, sweetie?” 

April leaned closer. “I thought you wanted some mother-daughter time. You know, just the two of us. This place is packed.” 

Mrs. Stevens nodded. “It is, but look around, it’s filled with friends and families, all talking to each other and laughing. I can’t think of a better atmosphere than this for us to sit down as two women—who happen to be mother and daughter, I’ll give you that—and have a relaxed conversation.” 

April swiveled around and took it all in. Her mother was right. Exactly in the same way that the Wesley household was the opposite of the one she grew up in, this place was to the fancy, uptight restaurants her father used to favor. She gave her mother a grateful smile. "I see what you mean, mom.” 

They were being herded through the bustling space by Trev, until he finally spotted an opening, offering them a couple of open seats at a corner table. 

“Y’all take a moment to check the menu and I’ll be back soon to take your order. Anything to drink?” 

“If we could just get some water to wet our throats. We’ll select something more fanciful once we’ve settled on the food,” Mrs. Stevens said. 

They settled in and started perusing the menu, each item listed a mouthwatering option. 

“I don’t know if I’ve said it enough lately, mom, but thank you.” 

“Don’t be silly, April, you don’t have to thank me.” 

“The way you handled Lynn—” 

“Is the way any mother would, or at least should, handle that kind of passive-aggressive nonsense.” 

Trev reappeared, and April’s mother gave him her order without being prompted: “Just a Chicken Caesar for me, please.” 

“Excellent choice, ma’am,” he complimented before switching his attention to April. “And what will you be having, young lady?” 

April suppressed her glare and gave him her sweetest smile, laced with just a tiny bit of venom. “The BBQ Chicken Scramble with grits on the side.” 

He just nodded and walked away. 

“He forgot about our drink order,” April pointed out, taking a swig of water. 

“I saw a realtor about the lake house yesterday.” April’s mom said out of the blue, taking her by surprise. They’d talked about this previously, but she’d seemed reluctant to take the steps necessary to put it on the market. 

“What did they say?” 

“She felt we shouldn’t have too much trouble finding a buyer but selling during the winter might depress the price somewhat. I told her not to worry too much about that. Maybe she can find a family that’ll make many happy memories there,” she shook her head sadly. “I’m sorry we don’t have too many of those. Yet. It’s my hope that going forward we will.” 

April wished she could convince her mother that she didn't place any blame at her feet, make her understand that she was telling the truth the countless times she'd told her so; only one person was to blame, and it wasn't her. “Mom, it’s okay to feel conflicted about this. Not everything was bad. At least not for all of those years. I have happy memories too, but I won’t deny they’ve been tainted by what followed. 

“Maybe selling the lake house will help you move on. We both need to do that. That man had such an outsized impact and held such sway over how we conducted ourselves and our lives... 

“If he continues to do so going forward will be up to us. I can’t speak for you, mom, but I know that I will _not_ allow that to happen to me.” April thought back to how she nearly lost Sterling, and the chill that went up her spine was very real. 

Their relationship was in a great place now, and she had no intention of _ever_ doing anything to put that in jeopardy, much less outright ruining it, but she suspected she would never shake the fear of losing Sterling, not completely. Surprisingly enough, she was okay with that. Now her focus was on the warm feeling of certainty she experienced every time Sterling looked at her. Her love wasn’t desperate anymore, it was solid and unassailable; her love for Sterling, and the confidence she found therein, was the very bedrock on which she had rebuilt herself and her life. It felt a little silly thinking of a life rebuilt already, but she had been through a lot, and dealt with things nobody should have to, regardless of age. 

Suddenly two plates slid onto the table out of nowhere, Trev making good use of his extensive ninja training. Or maybe April had just been lost in thought. She nodded her thanks and grabbed the utensils, shuffling a generous bite onto the fork before gulping down her food, hungrily. 

She allowed the arrival of the food to still the conversation, not certain she wanted to continue down the road it had taken. She apparently had a lot to say still about the damage her father had inflicted on this family— _her_ family, because it certainly wasn't his any longer. 

Eventually her mother was the first to break the silence: “We’ll have to go up there at some point to figure out what we should do with everything, but I had this thought...” 

“What, mom?” 

“Maybe you should invite your friends up there for a day or two of fun. Let’s make sure your last memories of that place are filled with joy and happiness.” 

April was speechless. “Mom, I—I don’t know what to say. That’s such a wonderful idea.” 

“Now, I know midterms are looming large and I would never suggest you forgo your studies.” 

“Not that I would.” 

Mrs. Stevens laughed. “You certainly never have. Your grades speak for themselves. So how about you check with your friends to make sure it suits them, but let’s say the lake house is at your disposal at the end of the semester. You can have something of a celebration and,” she searched for the word that was tickling her tongue, “decompress. I believe that is an appropriate term.” 

“It certainly will be once we’re in the middle of Midterm Madness.” 

Her mother laughed again. “Oh, that’s delightful. Did you come up with that?” 

“No, it was Sterling.” 

“She’s a treasure. The way she loves you. It makes me so happy.” 

April had been mulling over broaching this subject for a while now, but never quite found a graceful way to do so. “Mom, I’ve been lucky with Sterling,” she began before her mother interrupted. 

“Sweetie, there’s nothing lucky about what you share. You’ve built that together.” 

April smiled and nodded, acknowledging the truth in her mother’s statement. “What I’m trying to say is that I was given a second chance at our relationship, and I’ve felt blessed by that miraculous fact ever since, and I want that for you, mom. I want you to get a second chance at happiness, like I did,” April laughed, realizing how poorly constructed her argument was, ”albeit mine happened to be with the same person, and I don’t think either of us want that for you.” 

Mrs. Stevens made a disgusted face. “Absolutely not. I’m too old for that kind of tomfoolery.” 

“You deserve so much more than what he gave you, mom. I just want you to be happy, and if—only saying if here, nothing more—you were to find it, I would support you. The same way you’ve supported me and Sterling.” 

April’s phone started buzzing moments before Sterling’s ringtone, an annoyingly bouncy, vaguely Christmassy ska ‘tune’ that Blair had somehow managed to sneak onto her phone without her knowledge or consent, played, causing April to wonder if her girlfriend could sense that they were talking about her. 

“Oh, go ahead, sweetie. I know you’re dying to talk to her. You didn’t check your phone once during brunch. Ellen would be proud,” April’s mother said with a delighted laugh. 

April blushed and turned away from her mom. “Hello, Sterling, what can I do for you today.” 

“Still with your mom, huh?” Sterling teased. 

“That is correct. We’re still having brunch.” 

“But I thought you left church?” 

“We did. We needed,” April weighed her words carefully, “some personal space.” 

“Gotcha. And I bet the food was better than at the church brunch.” 

“God, yes, so much better,” April laughed. “Honey, we have to come here some time, just the two of us.” 

“It’s a date. A date, on a date in the near future.” 

“Speaking of near future, what are you doing?” 

“We’re baking! It’s so much fun. My mom is baking cookies for her book club’s bake sale and they’re delicious! Well, the dough is, we haven’t actually managed to put any in the oven just yet.” 

“That… that sounds like a mess.” 

“A delicious mess. You’re gonna join us, right?” 

April could swear she could hear Blair whooping in the background. “As soon as we’re done here, I’ll be right over.” 

“Can’t wait!” Sterling’s excitement practically radiated through the phone. “Miss you so much. So glad you’ll be here soon.” 

“Miss you too. I love you.” 

“Love you too.” 

“Love you more,” April huddled over the phone and made kissy-kissy noises at her girlfriend. 

“Love you lots and lots, babe,” Sterling said, returning the kisses. 

April’s mother cleared her throat. “You know, the sooner you stop being adorably in love and end the call, the sooner you can join her. 

“Your mom makes a great point, babe, tell her ‘thanks’ from me,” Sterling said. “You should listen to her.” 

April straightened herself. “I will. Bye, Sterl, see you soon.” She ended the call and turned to face her mother again. “Sterling sends her regards.” 

Mrs. Stevens just nodded knowingly. “Let’s just finish our meal. I can practically see you raring to go be with your girl.” 

******************************** 

The baking was well underway by the time April arrived at the Wesley home. Debbie had at least five trays filled with cookies completed, with several more in the oven. The Twins had been assigned to decorating duty and Blair had already eaten more icing than she’d managed to put on the cookies; April could tell by the accelerated speech and the way she kept bouncing back and forth between annoying Sterling and April. 

April offered to assist with the decorating and Debbie thanked her, placing a tray of Christmas tree themed cookies down in front of her. She began tracing along the edge, meticulously outlining the tree with delicious green icing. Sterling nudged her playfully causing her hand to slip and her perfect line to go crookedly across the center of the tree. 

April side-eyed Sterling, catching the cute mischievous grin on her face. “Really?” 

Sterling simply shrugged in response. 

“We should totally make holiday brownies,” Blair blurted, the excitement making her squeeze the piping bag a little too hard. The icing landed on the kitchen counter with a loud splat and she took a sharp breath, clearly mortified. “Whoops.” 

Placing the latest tray down to let the cookies cool, Debbie leaned into the counter, pressing her palm against the linoleum as she closed her eyes and scratched between her brows. “Blair, sweetie, why don’t you go ahead and clean that up,” she requested, exhaling lightly. She opened her eyes and gave her daughter her best non-irritated smile. “Then you and I can get started on those brownies.” 

“Yes!” Blair cooed excitedly as she dropped her piping bag down onto the counter. “On it!” 

Sterling watched her sister move around the kitchen with an amused wide-eyed expression. “Wow, I think Blair needs to be cut off,” she noted, brushing her index finger through the icing spilled on the table. She brought her finger to her lips, pausing when April took hold of her wrist. 

“Do not eat that,” April ordered, placing her bag gently down on the table. She grabbed a paper towel and wiped off Sterling’s finger, ignoring her pout. "Dealing with your sister's sugar high is enough. We do not need twin balls of energy bouncing around the kitchen." 

“Thank you, April,” Debbie said, flashing her a warm smile. “At least I know with you here I won’t have to rein in two—“ she paused when Blair slid across the tile floor and banged into the kitchen island wielding a roll of paper towels. She sighed, shaking her head. “Unbridled messes.” 

Sterling balked, offended. “Wow, thanks, mom.” 

Debbie waved her hand dismissively and turned to put another tray into the oven. 

April shrugged, returning to her work. “She’s not wrong,” she muttered, releasing a loud yelp when Sterling jabbed a finger into her side. Her hand squeezed the bag causing a large blob to fall in the center of her cookie. She made a frustrated noise and looked at her girlfriend. “You are determined to ruin this cookie.” 

“Guess it’s ours now,” Sterling said as she picked the tree up and placed it to the side. 

“That’s the fifth one that’s become—“ April raised her free hand and made air quotes. “Ours.” 

“She’s right, baby.” Debbie tossed her oven mitts onto the counter. “If y’all keep this up, I’m not going to have anything for the book club bake sale.” 

“You are really on Team April today, huh, mom?” Blair questioned, discarding the icing-soaked paper towel into the trash. 

“She’s the only one of you that’s being helpful at this point.” 

April winkled her nose, flaunting a smug expression toward the brunette. Blair stuck her tongue out in return. 

Debbie’s phone began to vibrate against the countertop and the older woman glanced over at the screen. Her hand raised, moving her hair away from her face allowing herself a clearer view. “Oh, April, honey, it’s your mama,” she announced, picking up the phone and bringing it to her ear. “Hey, Beth! How are you doing?” 

Sterling locked eyes with April, a silent question looming in her stare. 

“It’s probably about the bake sale,” April explained, informally. “I mentioned it to her after our call.” 

“Ohhh,” Sterling responded, pursing her lips. “Makes sense.” 

Mrs. Wesley held up her finger, excusing herself from the kitchen as she exited the room, still continuing her conversation. “April is doing such a great job decorating the cookies for our bake sale. Mhmm. I swear that daughter of yours is an absolute angel.” 

The word thrilled was an understatement to describe exactly how Sterling was feeling. The fact that her mother thought and spoke so highly of her girlfriend filled her with so much pride she felt like she could burst at any second. She glanced at April, noticing she had returned to decorating, but there was a small smile and faint blush on her cheeks. 

Obviously, she was a little overwhelmed by the outpouring of love herself. 

“Man, you’ve really got our mom fooled.” Blair joked, smirking. 

April pressed her tongue against her cheek, looking around the ensure Debbie was out of view. She turned back to Blair, raising her middle finger at the brunette. Blair’s jaw fell agape, and she placed her hand on her chest, gasping in mock offence. Sterling mimicked her, both surprised and amused by her girlfriend’s response. 

Blair bounced her head, impressed. “Didn’t think you had it in you, Stevens,” she chuckled before her face suddenly turned serious. She swayed, resting her hand on her stomach. “I think I need to lay down.” 

Sterling raised an eyebrow, inquisitively. “Sugar high ending?” 

“Yeah,” Blair mumbled, starting to make her way out of the kitchen. “I just need like... twenty minutes.” She held up her thumb then hurried up the stairs toward her room. 

“Is she going to be okay?” April asked, watching the other girl go. 

Sterling nodded, grabbing the tray of cookies shaped like ornaments Blair was working on. “She’ll be fine. She just needs to sleep it off.” 

April nodded, understanding as she continued to work on her design. Sterling worked quietly beside her, putting the finishing touches on the cookies abandoned by Blair. April watched Sterling in the periphery as she concentrated on her lines and textures. Sterling poked her tongue out between her teeth as she drew a squiggly line through the middle of her ornament, making April snicker lightly. 

“Don’t judge me,” Sterling said, shooting April a quick glance. 

“I just don’t understand how holding your tongue like that helps you focus.” 

Sterling blinked twice as she opened her mouth to respond but couldn’t really think of a valid argument. Before she could try again, April continued. 

“But it’s cute so whatever works.” 

“Aw, thanks, babe. You’re cute too.” 

April quietly laughed in response. Her gaze fixed on Sterling then she gasped suddenly, causing the blonde to meet her eyes. “I forgot to tell you,” she said, mindlessly resting her hand on Sterling’s forearm. “My mom is selling the lake house.” 

“Really?” Sterling eyes widened, surprised by the news. “When? Like, soon? Or...” 

“Not sure. She’s still working out the details,” April explained. She gently trailed her fingers up and down Sterling’s forearm. “She said we can have a little friend’s night though. I was thinking Friday the eighteenth. We can all hang out and watch some movies before we are bogged down in family stuff.” She raised her shoulder, casually. “It would be nice for my last memory of that place to be a happy one.” 

Sterling pulled her bottom lip between her teeth and nodded empathetically. “That sounds amazing.” She offered her a soft, closed mouth smile before bending forward, placing a lingering kiss on her forehead. She leaned back, smiling brightly once again. “I’ll make sure Blair takes that night off.” 

“Great,” April dragged out the words sarcastically then chuckled. “It’ll be a lot of fun.” 

“Oh, definitely.” Sterling turned, picking up one of their imperfect cookies. She took a bite, making a satisfied noise as she chewed. 

“Can I have a bite?” April asked, flashing Sterling a charming look. 

Sterling tilted the cookie in her direction. “You want to taste my cookie?” 

April was certain Sterling’s question was completely innocent but, for some reason, her cheeks flushed and the air around her suddenly turned thick and hot. A long _Uhh_ escaped from her throat and Sterling looked at her, utterly confused. 

“What?” Sterling questioned, the treat still hovering between them. 

April swallowed thickly before clearing her throat. “Sterl, you really need to watch your phrasing." 

Sterling’s expression shifted into a deeper confusion. “What are you talking about?” 

“Cookie, Sterl. Cookie.” She pointed at the treat hovering between them. “It's a euphemism. I'll let you guess for what exactly" 

Sterling knitted her brow tightly, and she tilted her head to the side. It took a moment but once her innuendo registered, Sterling’s eyes grew bigger and she mouthed a small oh. “Good thing my mom wasn’t around, huh?” 

April gave her a closed-mouth smile and nodded. She darted her tongue, lightly wetting her lips as she motioned toward the cookie again. “So, can I have a bite?” 

“I don’t know…” Sterling hummed, twisting her mouth in thought. “It’s a really good cookie.” 

“Okay, but I just want a bite. And there are like four more over there,” she jutted her chin toward plate behind Sterling. 

Sterling bounced her head from side to side, contemplating. “Yeah, but I really like this one.”

"Sterling Wesley.” April crossed her arms against her chest. “You’re being ridiculous. Just give me a bite.” She reached out to grab the cookie, but Sterling moved it out of her reach. April huffed, raising an eyebrow. “Are you being serious right now?” 

Sterling grinned and nodded. “Looks like I’ve got the cookie you want,” she teased, taunting her with the dessert. 

When April reached for the cookie again, Sterling lifted it higher. A hearty laugh escaped the taller girl, and April released a low growl. “Are you kidding me? You’re just going to hold it right out of my reach?” 

“Seems that way.” 

“You are so immature!” 

Sterling shot her a playful look, placing the cookie back down on the plate. She took a step closer, wrapping her arm around April’s waist and pulling her closer. April’s throat visibly bobbed, and Sterling felt her confidence grow from that simple reaction to their proximity. 

“You love my immaturity,” Sterling whispered, bringing her lips closer to April’s. 

“I love how adorable you are. There’s a difference,” April stated, breathing in to calm the rapid beating of her heart. 

Sterling’s eyes danced over her features pausing on her lips then slowly raising to meet her eyes once again. “It’s all the same.” 

“Not really.” 

Sterling’s smile spread as she leaned in and closed the space between them. April melted into the kiss, raising her hand to rest tenderly on Sterling’s jaw. Her thumb brushed faintly across her skin, smiling at the small, satisfied hum she received in response to her touch. Sterling tilted her head slightly, deepening their kiss until the sound of a throat clearing caused them to jump apart. 

Debbie stood in the doorway, holding her phone against her crossed arms. She looked from one girl to the other, eyebrow raised with a slightly stern expression. Sterling bit her lip, looking up toward the ceiling. April ducked her head, subtly wiping her girlfriend’s lip gloss from her lips. 

“Did the oven timer go off?” Debbie asked, eyeing them as she walked over to the oven. 

The duo shook their heads no, smiling sheepishly at one another before returning to their decorating duties…


	7. "Tinsel there?"

School let out thirty minutes ago and, unlike the rest of the Willingham student body, Sterling was stuck standing outside of Mr. Bennett’s Statistics classroom waiting for Blair. She had only heard half of the story of what caused her sister’s trip to after school lockdown. According to the Willingham tea delivery system, Blair decided Deacon Parker needed a little more fiber in his diet and shoved his notes into his mouth in the middle of his presentation. 

Maybe next time he would think better about doing a statistical essay on blonde’s having more fun. And maybe he next time he wouldn’t use Sterling and her relationship with April as an example of the type of fun he was hinting toward. 

Her stomach turned at the thought of her relationship being discussed like some perversion in the middle of a classroom. The audacity some of the boys at Willingham had was astounding. So was the fact that Blair was sitting solo in detention while Deacon walked free after spending a significant amount of time in the nurse's office. 

“Sterl, why are you still here?” 

Sterling turned at the familiar sound. “Hey, babe,” she greeted, smiling when April stopped beside her. She leaned down giving her a soft kiss. “Blair is in detention.” 

April half rolled her eyes and snorted a laugh. “What did your deviant sister do this time?” 

Sterling chucked, reaching out to wrap her arm around April’s waist. “She made Deacon eat his notes… literally.” 

April eyed her curiously. “Do I want to know why?” 

“No, because then tomorrow I’ll be waiting for you to get out of detention.” She pulled April flush against her body, linking her fingers together at the small of her back. “Also, I think Deacon has spent enough time in the nurse's office this week.” 

April’s attempt to protest Sterling’s reasoning was cut short when her girlfriend placed another soft kiss against her lips. The hum protesting the loss of contact April released caused her own cheeks to flush, embarrassed by her need to have constant physical contact with Sterling. She hoped the heat she felt across her cheeks wasn’t obvious. 

The door to Mr. Bennett’s classroom swung open and they both turned to see Blair walking backwards out of the room. “Yup! Sure thing, Mr. Bennett. I will never shove notebook paper in another person’s mouth for as long as I live.” She drew a sloppy cross against her chest. “Promise.” She raised her hand giving the man inside the room and obnoxious salute before closing the door and rolling her eyes. 

Blair muttered to herself coming to a sudden halt when she noticed the couple staring at her. Their amused expressions mirrored one another. 

“Listen…” Blair started as she raised her hand preparing to stop any comments. “Deacon deserved it and it’s not like I made him choke.” 

Sterling shot her a challenging look as she shifted her hold on April, taking her hand instead of their formerly intimate position. “He almost went to the ER.” 

“But he didn’t,” Blair argued, tightening her book bag strap over her shoulder. She looked at April, curiously. “What are you still doing here?” 

“Oh, Hannah B. needed a clearer explanation of an assignment,” April sighed as they started walking down the hall. “That took about thirty minutes of my life.” 

Sterling released a short laugh and lightly squeezed April’s hand. 

“You know what though? I’m glad you’re still here.” Blair stopped, spinning on her heels to face the couple. She held the strap on her bag, extending her index finger toward Sterling. “Would you mind taking your GF home? I need to go pick up her Christmas present and it’s easier when she’s not asking fifty million questions.” 

Sterling narrowed her eyes. “I don’t ask fifty—“ her words died on her lips when her girlfriend and sister both looked at her, brows raised knowingly. She muttered a few incoherent words before she finished with a “Yeah, okay.” 

April flashed a soft smile, tugging Sterling closer to her side. “Of course, I’ll give her a ride—“ she paused at the sly smirk that crossed Blair’s lips. Her face flushed instantly, and she cleared her throat. “Home. I’ll-take her home.” 

“Whatever you do, just do it safely,” Blair teased, reaching out to rough pat the side of April’s arm. A hearty laugh escaped her when April shot her a dirty look. She turned to her sister. “See you at home?” 

Sterling nodded then gave her a quick hug. Blair and April exchanged a high five and, oddly enough, the action made Sterling’s heart swell with happiness. It was so good to see her sister and her love getting along in their own weird way. Their own weird, sweet, adorable way. 

They continued on their way watching as Blair turned the corner and disappeared down the hall. Sterling smiled down at April, raising their joined hands toward her lips. “Looks like you’re stuck with me,” she joked, pressing a small kiss to the back of April’s hand. 

April mocked groaned, dropping her head back. “Ugh, such a chore,” she teased, giggling when Sterling tugged her impossibly closer and wrapped her arm around her shoulders. 

Sterling began an onslaught of quick kisses to the top of April’s head then her forehead then her cheeks. April half-heartedly protested the attack which only made Sterling find new ways to shower her girlfriend with love. They were passing the Fellowship room by the time Sterling buried her face against April’s neck when the door opened. 

“Oh, thank the Heaven’s you girls are still here!” 

They started at the sudden appearance of Ellen, looking as frantic as they had ever seen her. Without another word, she rushed toward them, taking both their wrists. The couple was thrown off balance from the force of Ellen’s yank and they stumbled behind her into the Fellowship room. 

Ellen released her grasp, stopping in the center of the room. “Girls, we just got in a ton of new Christmas decorations,” she explained, trying to ease some of the confusion written all over their faces. “Now, I know we don’t have a meeting today and technically I really can’t expect y’all to do this, but the new stuff is oh so festive and I think it would look great if we added some of it to your already beautiful work, April.” 

April put on her perfect, polite smile and stood straighter, instantaneously shifting into Committee Chairwoman mode. “We would love to help, Ellen.” She half turned to look at Sterling. “Wouldn’t we, honey?” 

“Huh? Oh, yeah, sure,” Sterling agreed, nodding blankly along. “Whatever you need us to do.” 

Ellen squealed, leaning back as she waved her fists in the air. “Ah, I knew I could count on you two. I love you girls so much. Thank you.” She reached into her pocket, pulling out her keys. “There’s a new supply room down the hall across from the girl’s bathroom.” She handed the keys to April, cupping their hands together. “If you could grab them and then just spruce up in here a little bit that would be fantastic.” 

“Sure thing.” 

“Not a problem. We’ll take care of it.” 

“Thank you so much, girls. You can just lock up when you're done. I’ll be in the teachers' lounge working on a few things with Coach so you can just drop the keys off to me there, so I don’t have to run back and forth like an airport shuttle.” 

The girls chuckled simultaneously and exchanged a glance. Ellen thanked them again, gathering up a few notebooks she had lying on the center table. She informed them to text her if they had any pertinent questions then hurried out of the room leaving them with no further instructions or information. 

April bounced the keys in her hand as she turned to Sterling. “Seems like we’ve been recruited.” 

“Wouldn’t be the first time,” Sterling noted with a low chuckle. She picked up the keys from April’s palm, holding them by the mismatched Rubik’s Cube. “This situation seems familiar.” 

The shorter girl narrowed her eyes, taking the keys from her girlfriend. “I’m going to need you to try and behave,” April joked, slipping her hand inside Sterling’s. “The faster we get this done, the faster we can get out of here.” 

“Wow, babe, you really know how to sweet talk a girl.” 

April flashed her a scolding look, ignoring the impish grin on Sterling’s lips as she intertwined their fingers and pulled her out of the room… 

********************************** 

When the door closed behind them, April and Sterling looked around, marveling at the room before them. Getting a look behind the scenes of Willingham Academy was always weird. Ellen had made out like this storage space was some tiny little cupboard where she threw assorted knickknacks she needed out of the way. 

In fact, this was large enough to be one of their classrooms. The most logical conclusion was that it probably had been a classroom at one point in time but was converted to serve as storage when the need arose. Judging by the state of things, there would soon be need again, because this place was jammed with boxes, both large and small. 

“Where did Ellen say she put the boxes?” Sterling asked. 

“She didn’t. She probably thought it would be obvious,” April said while scanning the shelving units for something marked with a large red X, as in Xmas. 

Sterling’s eyes darted down to the floor right in front of her, like, right at her feet; when she needed to get things stashed away out of view, that’s what she did: push it inside just enough that the door would close. Out of sight, out of mind. The square foot of floor in front of her was disappointingly empty, although it could probably do with a good scrub. 

“Sterl, it won’t be literally at your feet.” 

“You never know. Why would Ellen put the boxes away if she knew we’d need them in a couple of hours? 

April felt her stomach drop and she fought back the urge to give Sterling a piece of her mind. “Can’t you just get looking? I love Ellen and of course I want to help, but I’d rather not spend all evening at school as well.” 

“I think you might be able to carbon date some of the boxes in here and get reasonably accurate results.” 

“You might be right. Maybe we should focus our effort on boxes that don’t have an inch of dust and grime on top of them.” 

“Exactly.” 

“Why don’t you start at the back wall and I will,” April looked around until she spotted something that looked promising, “I’ll focus on those units over there.” 

Sterling nodded and started her search. After she’d checked ten boxes, she felt frustration begin to mount. She couldn’t find any more suitable candidates along the back wall so she turned to ask April if she’d had any better luck, a smile breaking out when she saw her girlfriend up on her tiptoes, reaching for a box high up on the shelves. She grinned to herself, imagining the way April’s calves must be flexing as she bounced up and down, trying to gain an extra inch of reach. She licked her lips and swallowed. That bouncing was hypnotic. 

The clothing deemed acceptable at Willingham would never be allowed to be tight enough to show off the muscles and curves Sterling knew April had, but the images in her mind were clear enough. She wondered what else was being hidden by April’s clothes right now; when she’d stepped out of the shower this morning, and was deciding what to wear, what did she settle on? The dress code at Willingham didn’t offer up much choice, but one category was not regulated by it, except to forbid the visible display thereof. 

So, when April was done drying herself off, towel wrapped tightly around her body--and boy, wouldn’t Sterling love to be that towel--what was her girlfriend in the mood for when she went through her underwear drawer? Practical or perhaps a bit daring? Knowing April, it would definitely be the former, but Sterling could definitely admire and appreciate a tight backside hugged by Star Wars boy shorts. 

She remembered one night when they were done kissing, or at least taking a short break to allow themselves to be catch their breaths, and they were just laying side by side on April’s bed, listening to what could only be described as panting slowly subside, when she saw the black trim poking out of the top of April’s favorite sweats, a pair she wore so often they were frayed and the fabric had been worn shiny. 18 months previous, she never could’ve imagined prim, proper April like this. Now she loved it like no other. 

This was _her_ April. 

At that point, when they’d finally managed to find their way back together and started navigating what this between them was, and would become, they’d worked at not moving too fast, not pushing too hard, like the thing between them was brittle and prone to breaking. Looking back, knowing now that what they share is so solid, so very solid, it feels silly that they denied themselves even exploratory touches and shy smiles shared whenever they discovered just how easily and deeply they could affect each other. 

That night, she had felt bold, and perhaps a bit lightheaded from oxygen deprivation, so she’d taken the soft black fabric being exposed between her fingers and given it a soft tug. April turned her head to give her a questioning look, something different playing across her already flushed face, something… intriguing. Something new and enticing. They talked about their feelings a lot, revealed how certain actions made them feel, and wondered out loud if this was too good to be true. Sterling had given a firmer tug and the way April’s body had responded was exhilarating. That night they were about to find out that their bodies held entire conversations that they had no control over. 

They also established beyond question that Sterling definitely was a butt woman, something she’d probably known if she’d been willing to admit it to herself... 

Back in the here and now, Sterling smiled to herself, because the first time she’d gone over to the Stevens house and been greeted by April in a loose tank top and tight shorts, her heart had grown ten sizes and the love and fondness she felt for her girlfriend had threatened to explode, shattering her into millions of tiny, pink heart-shaped pieces. 

Going down these delicious soft, fluffy memory holes filled with nothing but April and how April felt and looked and smelled didn’t help them find the fresh box of Christmas decorations they’d come here for, but Sterling was beyond resisting temptation. 

That loose tank top and shorts, April had called her “lifting outfit” and all Sterling could do was nod stupidly and bite her tongue then, like literally give it a quick bite, to stop herself from dropping to her knees and kissing every bit of exposed skin along the sides of April’s compact body while giving her butt a loving caress or ten. 

It wasn’t just that seeing April in that outfit made Sterling feel all woozy and she had to redefine what she thought being horny was like, it was also the joy of being allowed to see casual April, the April that existed outside the confine of the restraints brought on by their upbringing and the surroundings they found themselves. April, post-workout sweat making her skin glisten, was a treat, a snack she would nibble on gladly, taking her time to savor every bite. 

Much like she was tempted to get down on her knees behind April right now and take a playful bite out of her bouncing backside. 

“Sterl, give me a hand here, please. I think that box looks new, but I can’t quite reach,” April said, pointing at a box on the top shelf. “Sterl? Are you even listening to me?” 

“Huh?” Hearing April’s voice ought to have snapped Sterling out of her reverie, but the memory hole was so comfy, and she was so wrapped up in the April in there with her, busy kissing her senseless and doing something with her fingers that felt so daring and _good_ that instead of coming to her girlfriend’s aid, Sterling just stood there dazed, heartbeat pounding in her ears. 

“Sterling!” And there was that tone of voice again. Some might say it had been the cause of all this. It’d been a while since Sterling had heard it coming from April’s lips aimed at her. Oh, April’s lips. 

“Yeah, I’m here, what do you need?” she hoped April would simply answer you and end up doing all the things that had been on Sterling’s mind since April had destroyed any sense of wanting in the Fellowship room not even a week ago. It was not a question of want any more. She’d wanted April for what felt like an eternity now. She even told her that much that day. The want had escalated and transformed into a need. 

Sterling was surprised she’d managed to hold it together this long. Surprised nobody had noticed how the looks she gave April had transformed alongside her desire. 

“I need you to _get over_ here and help me get that box,” April snapped, and Sterling thought she might just die. She would melt into a puddle and… oh, oh lord. She giggled softly when she realized how pointedly accurate that image was, the furious blush blossoming masked by how flush her features were already. She tried taking a step forward and wobbled slightly, unsure of how to walk while in this state, her patella’s definitely quivering. 

“Sterl, please, the sooner we find this box and put up the decorations, the sooner we can get out of here and move onto other things,” April said, her voice suddenly sweet and filled with promise. 

That did it. She took a small step toward her girlfriend and then one more. 

April reached out for her, looking like she was afraid she’d collapse before closing the distance. “Are you okay, honey? You seem rather… unsteady.” She grasped Sterling’s hand, smoothing soothing caresses across the back using her thumb. “Your face looks just like that time you tried five times in a row to beat Blair at the 60-yard dash.” 

“And if you checked my pulse,” _preferably by biting my neck,_ “I’m pretty sure you’d find it to be elevated. Yup,” Sterling nodded, “I’m definitely coming down with something.” 

April shifted her hand, placing two of her fingers across Sterling’s wrist. “You’re right, your heart is racing. Is everything okay?” She moved her hand to Sterling’s forehead, brushing the hair out of her eyes. “Your eyes are all unfocused too. I’m starting to worry.” 

Sterling hoped April was too preoccupied with attempting to diagnose her condition to notice the shiver that shot through her whenever April’s hand made contact with her skin. Which felt like it was on fire. All over. “I’m fine, I’m fine. Let’s just get that box and pray it’s the right one.” 

Sterling resisted the urge to follow through with her original impulse when April nodded and released her hold, turning to once again face the shelves. 

“It’s the one up there,” she said, once again standing on her tiptoes, arm outstretched. “Do you see which one I’m pointing at?” 

“Mmhmm,” Sterling replied, her eyes definitely not glued to some boring cardboard box. _Lord, help me_ , she thought and took a step forward, reaching out to run her hands over April’s ass, the fabric not nearly as smooth and warm under her touch as she knew April’s skin would be. Will be in a minute once she manages to get her girlfriend into a state of sufficient undress. Would be. _Will be_. 

“Sterling!” April twisted around so quickly that Sterling almost lost contact with her current favorite part of April’s body. 

“Sorry, sorry. I’ll be a good girl!” 

April gave her an angry look. “You’d better be.” 

“I’ll help. Promise. Show me which box again.” 

When April for the third time indicated a box on the top shelf, Sterling moved her hands to April’s waist, attempting to lift her off the ground. Which turned out to be a mistake in-and-of itself. She had assumed given April's stature it would be easy, a piece of cake, but she’d gravely misjudged the energy required to lift and then hold her girlfriend aloft for long enough for her to grab the box. 

It didn’t take long at all before Sterling’s arms were shaking from the effort, and when Sterling lost her grip, April barely had her hand on top of the box, causing it to slam against the box, flipping it off of the shelf; April turned her head as the box came hurtling toward her trying to avoid taking one to the face. 

Her swift movement caused an already unsteady Sterling to fatally falter. They tumbled to the ground when Sterling’s knees gave way and she lost her balance, falling backwards, taking April down with her, April’s fall broken by Sterling’s soft body. 

Adding insult to hopefully no injuries, the box landed right on top of them, its content exploding into a Christmassy mess all around them. 

“Well, that didn’t go as planned,” Sterling groaned, blowing a clump of tinsel away from her face. 

“No, it did not,” April grumbled, pulling tinsel and garland from her face and mouth. She sputtered as she removed the last huge clump, letting her head fall back to rest on her girlfriend's chest. ”Sterl, what the hell was that?” 

“I’m sorry,” Sterling said, resting her hands against April’s hips. “I thought I could lift you up. You make it look so easy when you do it to me.” 

“Because I actually work out.” April rolled over so she could look her girlfriend in the eyes while giving her a piece of her mind. Placing her hands on either side of Sterling’s head, bracing herself as she hovered over her girlfriend, she found Sterling staring intently at her, eyes no longer unfocused. The look she met was one of pure, unbridled desire. April didn’t know how she’d been so blind. 

“I’m well aware,” Sterling said with a smirk, holding April’s gaze, squeezing her hips as if to prove her point. 

“This could have turned out very bad.” 

“I don’t know. I’m kind of okay with this.” 

April furrowed her brow, momentarily confused. Her gaze shifted downward, finally taking in the position they were currently in. Her face flushed and she scrambled to sit upright but was stopped by Sterling tightening her grip. 

”Sterl…” April’s voice sounded strained to own ears and could only imagine how desperate she sounded to the girl below her. 

“Hear me out, babe.” 

“I already know what you’re going to say…” 

“What am I going to say?” 

April shifted her gaze away from Sterling’s blue eyes. She couldn’t bear to stare into them any longer knowing what she was about to say. “That we have the perfect opportunity to—“ she paused, the words sitting heavy in her throat. 

Sterling moved one hand from her hip, placing it underneath April’s chin, bringing her blue eyes back to her. “To have sex?” 

“I was going to say make love, but okay,” April noted, a nervous chuckle lacing her tone. She sighed, shifting her body so she was pressed more firmly against Sterling, the comforting warmth of her body radiating through her school clothes. “Sterl, I want to. You know I do—“ 

“But?” 

“But—” April collected herself, making sure the words would express everything she felt. “Everything about us has been special up until this point. Our first kiss. Our first date. The first time we went on a date-date in public. Our firsts are something I treasure. I want the first time we make love to be just as special as every other thing we’ve experienced together. We just have to figure out the when and where of it. And we will do that… together. Like we always do.” 

Sterling marveled at how April always knew how to make her stomach do a little flip-flop, indicating exactly how much she loved the girl currently resting on top of her. 

She twisted her mouth in thought then smiled. “Yeah, I guess this isn’t the most romantic place.” 

“The dirty floor of the school's storage room?” April quipped, a soft half-smile playing on her lips. “No. No, it’s not.” 

Sterling chuckled, slightly embarrassed for allowing her need for April to cloud her better judgement. She made the most of April being flush against her, wrapping her arms around the small of her back. “I didn’t mean to make you feel pressured.” 

April shook her head vigorously. “Honey, no, you didn’t—“ 

“I just—I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you, about us—you know...“ Sterling felt a faint blush form on her cheeks. The slow tug of her favorite smile on April’s lips showed her how obvious her feelings were. “And I love you so much and I want you so badly, but—“ she exhaled. “I can wait. Back in the Fellowship room I told you that you're taking the lead. I meant it. I can wait for as long as you want me to.” 

The sincerity in Sterling’s voice, in her eyes, was overwhelming; April found herself drawn to her, leaning closer, wanting to feel her girlfriend’s soft lips pressed against her own. Their kiss was slow at first, lingering lips grazing, filled with words left unspoken. It wasn’t long before the kiss deepened, turning into something more heated. More than April intended when she placed her lips upon Sterling’s. 

She dropped down to her elbows, resting on lower arms cradled around Sterling’s head, when she suddenly realized she was in an awfully familiar position. Only Sterling wasn’t a plank, nothing about her rigid and hard, her girlfriend was soft and pliable and so very kissable. April’s tongue traced along Sterling’s lips, waiting to be accepted in. The moan that escaped when Sterling parted her lips and allowed the kiss to progress made April shiver with delight. 

_She_ caused that moan. She had that effect on Sterling. And she would never tire of this. 

April pushed herself up so she could take in the glorious sight of her girlfriend below her, hair splayed out and face flushed with excitement. She couldn’t help the half-smirk she flashed at Sterling before leaning back in, her lips grazing against the hollow of Sterling’s throat before moving on to her neck, nuzzling against the soft skin they found there. 

When April’s continued exploration along Sterling’s collarbone was impeded by the stiff fabric of a Willingham Academy approved button down, April’s hands moved on their own accord, undoing button upon button swiftly and efficiently, as if they had done nothing else for years and years. She pushed the shirt aside and returned to the task at hand. 

The first nibble along Sterling's collarbone was rewarded with whimper, Sterling's breath hitching when April's teeth continued to graze her skin, tiny nips being placed along the way back up to Sterling's neck. When April opened her mouth wider and allowed her tongue to trace a path up her girlfriend's slender neck, Sterling's hands finally realize they could paw at April and cling on for dear life. 

April placed one hand against Sterling's chest, lazily moving it up her throat, onto her chin, gentle pressure applied to request her to turn her head. She could feel the trembling of Sterling's soft shudders transfer across, so April closed her eyes, leaned in and gave her the blonde's delectable neck a loving bite. 

The sound Sterling made thrilled April; it was raw, almost animalistic, leaving no possibility of being mistaken for anything else. Urged on by Sterling's response, April moved her hand to cradle Sterling's cheek, soft soothing caresses to calm her before the storm hit. When she felt Sterling’s, lips close around the tip of her thumb, her own breathing hitched. 

Not willing to break their connection, she sat up slightly, a grin appearing when she saw Sterling, eyes closed, lips still wrapped around her finger. She wanted to lean in and kiss her silly, but instead she put her other hand on Sterling's sternum and pushed herself up to sit across Sterling's body. 

She rubbed her palm in small circles, waiting for her girlfriend to catch up, to return from whatever place she found herself right now. When Sterling finally opened her eyes, April quirked her brow and laughed softly when Sterling shyly averted her eyes. 

April leaned in, kissing the corner of Sterling's mouth, further soft kisses feathered across her lips and down her chin. She used the hand splayed across Sterling's cheek to direct her gaze to meet her own, watching intently as her other hand began traveling down Sterling's body. 

Their foreheads met, and she could hear Sterling hum softly, occasionally mewl appreciatively when April's hand moved across a patch of particularly sensitive skin. She almost jumped when April’s hand bumped against her underwear, fingertips making their way along the waistband. April gave Sterling a lingering kiss before allowing her fingers to go exploring. 

April's heart was pounding when she finally dared cross that line and her fingers pushed beneath the fabric, the way Sterling's breathing stuttered making her think she was the one hyperventilating. 

She allowed herself to explore further, hand moving further down, until she realized she had Sterling excitement coating her fingers. This time it was her breath that hitched. "Oh, Sterl, I didn't realize just how..." 

"Told you, thinking a lot... fantasizing, really." 

April just smiled, removing her hand from its tantalizing position. She kept caressing Sterling's cheek and leaned in to place a soft kiss opposite. 

"Then we'd better make sure our first time lives up to all that." 

She pushed herself up from the floor, trying not to show how affected she was by the loss of Sterling’s body pressed against her own. A small chuckle escaped her when her girlfriend whined and she extended her hand, wiggling her fingers for Sterling to take the offer. The smile gracing Sterling’s lips as she took her hand reached her beautiful blue eyes and April felt her heart flutter at the endearing look she was receiving. 

April swallowed, clearing away the dryness in her throat as she took a small step toward Sterling. She brushed her hands over the front of her shirt, pushing away stray strands of tinsel and garland that had settled on her button up. They maintained eye contact while April slowly buttoned her girlfriend’s shirt back up, straightening her appearance. The comfortable silence enveloped them as they held each other’s stare. 

“We should probably get this stuff over to the Fellowship room,” April suggested, softly. 

Sterling nodded. “Okay.” 

April nodded as well; a loving smile adorned her lips. “Okay.” 

************************************************ 

“Hey, baby! Glad you’re finally home! Dinner should be ready soon!” 

Sterling put some distance between herself and the kitchen where her mother was hovering over the stove. She ran her hand through her hair, pushing her locks over her shoulder. “Okay, mom,” she replied, making a swift dash for the stairs. “I’m going to go put my stuff down and clean up.” 

Debbie offered a quick glance and nodded. “Alright.” She paused her work and turned slightly. “Sweetie, will you please help your sister with whatever she’s doing.” She waved her spoon around in the air to emphasize her words. “She’s been banging around up there since she came home.” 

Sterling nodded, giving her mother a short wave before making her way up the stairs. An uncontrollable smile pulled onto her lips and she felt like she was floating. Her lips still tingled from April’s touch. She could still feel the press of her body and the faint tickle of her breath against her skin. Everything about their time alone played like a movie in her head. 

This had to be what forever felt like. 

“Ugh!” 

Sterling snapped from her memories at the sound of Blair’s grunt. She halted her steps and stood by the top of the stairs. Blair was hunched over a large box shoving her entire body weight into the cardboard as she tried to push the package into her room. Sterling crossed her arms against her midsection, raising her shoulders as she watched her twin struggle. 

“Um, you need some help?” Sterling asked, taking a small step forward. 

Blair kept her focus in the direction of her bedroom door as she continued to push. “No, it’s your present. You can’t help me,” she groaned, pushing harder until she collapsed on the box. She sat down on the floor letting out an exhausted exhale. Her eyes immediately shifted to Sterling, scanning her appearance for a moment with a raised eyebrow. 

“What?” 

A haughty half smirk formed on Blair’s lips as she pushed herself to her feet. She took a few rapid steps toward Sterling who backed up out of instinct. “Do you need help?” the brunette asked, reaching down to tug a gleaming silver piece of something sticking through Sterling’s zipper. She yanked once and it snapped in her hand. “Is this tinsel?” She brought the flimsy decoration up to inspect it. 

Sterling’s mouth dropped open and she muttered a few incoherent words. 

Blair looked down noticing there was still some remnants of the tinsel left on the zipper of Sterling’s khaki’s. She flashed her sister a curious look. “How on _earth_ did you get tinsel there?” She narrowed her eyes, studying the flush on her sister’s cheeks and the nervous ramblings tumbling from her lips. Blair’s expression turned teasing as she slowly nodded her head. 

“Ohhhhhh…,” Blair breathed, knowingly. 

Sterling narrowed her eyes and ripped the small silver decoration from Blair’s fingers. “Shut up,” she muttered as she pushed around her twin and stomped off to her room. 

The sound of Blair’s obnoxious laughter and cat calls were cut off immediately by the slamming of Sterling’s bedroom door….


	8. "Christmas music.."

“How long does this playlist have to be anyway?” 

April peeked over the top of her laptop. Hannah B laid on her stomach beside her jotting down notes while Ezequiel sat by her vanity, checking his eyebrows in her mirror. They were supposed to be preparing the playlist for the Fellowship Christmas party but an hour had passed, and they still hadn’t even decided on exactly how many songs they were even going to use. 

“That depends,” Ezequiel answered, leaning closer toward the mirror. “"Is this for torture or the party?” He turned, facing the two girls on the bed and waved his hand. “Oh, never mind, it's the same. Making people listen to Christmas music for the duration of the party is cruel and unusual.” 

April shook her head, half rolling her eyes. “Enough to last about two hours, Hannah B,” she answered, returning her focus to her screen. 

Hannah B. scrunched her brow before quirking an eyebrow. “So, like, fifty?” 

Ezequiel scoffed. “That’s excessive.” 

“Let’s start with twenty,” April suggested, barely looking up from her screen. “That’s a nice, non-excessive number.” 

“Okay,” Hannah B. agreed as she opened a music app on her phone. Her eyes lit up with excitement as she looked back at April. “Is it okay if I connect to Baby Yoda?” 

“Yes, of course.” 

Ezequiel eyed April curiously. “What is so interesting over there, April? You’ve been very MOBOT since we started this. Well, actually,“ he tilted his head in thought, “what would be the laptop version of MOBOT?” 

Hannah B. chewed pensively on the corner of her lip. “LOBOT?” 

Ezequiel shook his head. “That’s no more stupid that ‘Grogu’ at least.” 

"Yeah, GROGU!! April, how could they name him that. Does that name have some special meaning in Star Wars, April, does it?” Hannah B. seemed unfashionably upset for something as unimportant as the name of a fictional character. “He’ll always be Baby Yoda to me.” 

April simply nodded. “Baby Yoda is the only way to talk about him. Even ‘The Child’ felt wrong.” 

“Are we seriously arguing the naming conventions of Star Wars characters?” Ezequiel asked. “When we could be debating on which version of _Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas_ we should put on the playlist. You know, truly important stuff.” 

This caused April to finally look up and face her friend. “I better not hear about any shining stars being hung on any boughs, highest or otherwise.” 

“Nerd,” Hannah B. giggled. 

“Did you know the lyrics were actually changed twice? Everybody knows about the Sinatra vers—” 

“Not everybody. And nobody cares anyway,” Ezequiel interrupted April before addressing Hannah B. “Just put the Garland version on there. April’s right.” 

“I usually am,” April stated, poking her tongue at Ezequiel when he rolled his eyes at her. 

“Somebody has a high opinion of herself, as usual,” he replied, raising his eyebrow. “But also... an unusual sense of lightness and ease. That wouldn’t have anything to do with what you’re finding so fascinating on your computer, would it?” 

“I’m just trying to find the perfect Christmas present for Sterling.” April returned her focus to her browser, overflowing with tabs opened to every online shop and gift recommendation site April could think of. 

“Still? We’re well into December. I’ve never known you to leave it this late. You’re usually wrapped by October.” 

“I know. It’s just... hard. It’s our first Christmas as a couple. It’s important,” April sighed, feeling Christmas barreling down on her at a million miles an hour. 

Ezequiel just snorted. “Whatever. You could get that girl a literal lump of coal and she’d find some very inventive ways to show you her gratitude.” 

Hannah B. scrambled to an upright position, crossing her legs underneath her as she scrolled through her phone. “Oh, what about this one?” 

The sound of bells and guitars filtered through Baby Yoda and April smiled when Hannah B. began swaying back and forth to the beat. A remarkably high-pitched voice started singing about a wanting a hippopotamus for Christmas and Ezequiel wrinkled his nose. Hannah B. seemed to be enjoying the song as she muttered along with the words. 

“You’re serious?” Ezequiel asked, exchanging a look with April. 

Hannah B. looked up, continuing to sway to the music. “What? This song is great!” She lowered her phone, resting it in her lap. “And who wouldn’t want a hippopotamus for Christmas?” 

“Girl, you know how much room one of those things would take up?” 

April laughed at the exchange. “I think it’s a great choice, Hannah B. Go ahead and add it to the playlist.” 

Hannah B. squealed excitedly and added the song. 

“Sterling has made you soft,” Ezequiel teased, bringing the subject of her girlfriend back around. 

“That’s not such a bad thing, Ezequiel,” Hannah B. noted, sliding her thumb across the screen to start a new song. 

“Thank you, Hannah B.,” April said, sharing a smile with her friend. She snapped her fingers suddenly, realizing she hadn’t told them the news. “Oh, hey, Christmas get together at the lake house on the eighteenth so make no plans.” 

“That sounds fun.” Ezequiel hummed. “Will the twins be joining us?” 

April shot him a look. “Of course. This will be a,” she smiled to herself, “framily affair.” 

“Oh, so your mom will be joining us?” 

April hesitated, knowing full well what Ezequiel would say once she replied. “No, it will just be us ‘kids’, as she put it. She’s giving us unfettered access so we can decompress after midterms.” 

“Unsupervised high school kids with a whole house to themselves? That sounds like a potential teen slasher movie.” 

“We will _not_ be watching slasher movies.” 

Ezequiel smirked. “I see somebody has made special plans for the evening.” 

“Not at all,” April stated flatly. “I simply thought a movie night would be a fine way to,” her face scrunched up in disgust at the coming word, “ _hang_.” 

Hannah B. bounced up so suddenly April’s entire bed shook, “Yes! I always loved watching movies on that big screen your father had installed at the lake house.” 

“I’ve said this so many times that I don’t know why I bother anymore,” Ezequiel said. “Read the room, Hannah B., for the love of god, read the room.” 

“It’s okay, Ezequiel. I don’t mind. In fact, this trip is about re-framing the lake house. Putting him out of the picture.” April smiled and quoted her mother’s words: “It’s about making sure my memories of that place are filled with joy and happiness’.” 

“Your mom is the best,” Hannah B. beamed at April. 

Spinning around in his chair, Ezequiel just nodded in agreement. 

“I agree. I’ve been blessed. But if the memories are to be happy, that means no slasher movies” April glared at Ezequiel. 

“Is there any other kind? We have _Happy Death Day, Happy Death Day 2 U_.” 

April laughed at Ezequiel’s silliness. “Since Christmas will only be a week away, I thought the obvious option was to host a Christmas movie movie marathon.” 

“ _It’s a Wonderful Life_ ,” Hannah B. immediately offered up. 

“ _The Nightmare Before Christmas_ ," came Ezequiel’s suggestion. 

“Can we please not watch that?” Hannah B. requested, shivering at the mere mention. 

April looked at her curiously. “Why? It’s Christmassy and heartwarming. In the end.” 

“I don’t care. Those puppets are creepy!” 

Ezequiel extended his hand, wiggling his finger. “You should totally add that one song on the playlist… from that movie.” 

“What song?” 

“ _Kidnap the Sandy Claws_.” 

April cocked her head to the side and hummed. “Do you really thank that’s appropriate? 

“It’s a fun message.” 

“Kidnapping Father Christmas is a fun message?” 

Ezequiel shrugged his shoulder. “Some people might think so.” 

“I don’t,” Hannah B. noted with a pout. 

April mimicked her pout then reached out to pat her friend’s knee. “We won’t put that on the list,” she promised, bringing a smile to Hannah B.’s face. 

Ezequiel sucked his teeth as he rolled his eyes. “Fine.” 

“Sterling suggested _Heck, Why Is Santa Always Jolly?_ ” 

“Speaking of torture.” This time around Ezequiel’s eye roll was so severe it threatened to bowl a perfect three hundred. "How does one have a partner with such atrocious taste in Christmas music?” 

“Have you heard the things Blair listen to?” April shot back. 

"True, but you're not going to live with Blair for the rest of your life." 

“Don’t say that.” April looked away. “No-one can know for sure what the future holds.” Her blush deepened even more when she glanced over and saw the knowing look Ezequiel shot her. He was being really annoying today, saying things out-loud that April barely admitted to herself, no matter of how secure she felt about her and Sterling, and what their future might hold. Normally, she saw no reason to tempt fate. “Though I certainly hope so.” 

“That’s all I’m saying. Make it manifest!” 

“And I’ll have you know not everything Sterling likes is atrocious. She loves the Mariah Carey Christmas album. A ‘stone-cold classic’. We should add all of that to playlist.” 

"I know you got it bad, and for the record, I agree with your girl, but that doesn't mean every track is gonna be on this playlist. Let’s stick to the obvious. Do you think _All I Want for Christmas Is You_ is obvious enough for Sterling to get the hint?" 

Hannah B. looked up from her phone, shifting her attention from April to Ezequiel. “Get what hint?” 

The duo turned to her both sharing the same amused pout. Hannah B. grew even more confused the longer they stared at her. Ezequiel stood from his place on the chair, making himself comfortable on the cushioned bench sitting at the foot of April’s bed. He settled in, leaning forward to place his hand gently on Hannah B.’s knee. 

Hannah B. held her hands out. “What? What’s the hint?” 

Ezequiel patted her knee and breathed in, raising his brow. “So, the playlist,” he said, swerving the conversation. “No, on Mariah Cary’s entire album. No to the best song on the Nightmare soundtrack. Yes, to a ridiculous song about elephants-“ 

“Hippopotamuses.” 

He waved his hand dismissively. “Same thing.” 

Hannah B. made a face. “Not at all.” 

“Oh, I found it!” April blurted. Her hands flung upward, excitedly 

“Found what?” Ezequiel asked, ignoring the frustrated grunt Hannah B. released. 

April looked up from her laptop. “A baby Yoda squish pillow for Sterling.” She turned her computer showing them the adorable, albeit insanely large, squish pillow. “She’s going to love it.” 

Ezequiel shifted his position, leaning further onto April’s bed. “Okay, first I didn’t know Sterling was into Star Wars. I’m going to assume that was your influence.” He hummed when April smiled proudly. “Second, I thought you said the gift had to be special?” He extended his index finger moving it in a circle in front of the image. “That is not special.” 

“It is too,” April argued, turning the image back to herself. “And her last gift is going to be the special one.” 

“Last gift?” Ezequiel blinked. “Girl, how many gifts have you bought her already?” 

April kept her eyes on the screen as she put the item in her cart. “Including this one?” She shrugged her shoulder. “Four.” 

“Four?!” Ezequiel exclaimed, making a scolding noise as he reached out for the laptop. “No, no. You’re done. Give me the laptop.” 

April looked at him like he had lost his mind. She placed her hand on top moving the device further from his reach. “What? No.” 

He turned to Hannah B. “Girl, get her laptop.” 

Hannah B. raised her hand in defense. “I’m not getting involved in this. I’m looking for Christmas songs.” She inched back putting more space between herself and the current scuffle. 

“April,” Ezequiel sighed. “You are going way overboard. You don’t have to spoil her.” 

April scoffed, shooting him an incredulous look. “I’m not spoiling her.” 

Ezequiel raised an eyebrow, "I get that you want to spoil her, but you better thread lightly. Don't want to scare her off by—" 

"Being me?" 

"I was going to say 'too intense'. But that is practically your whole brand, so." 

April blushed. "She's told me it's never too much." 

“And for the record, ‘too intense’ seems like it might be a thing of the past.” Ezequiel looked at her, his face softer than moments before. “She’s good for you. You’re good together. Don’t think we haven’t noticed.” 

Hannah B., still busily adding to the Christmas playlist nodded solemnly. “Totally. You’re like... like a squishy Baby Yoda pillow these days.” Her face lit up and she looked at April. “Oh my god! That’s why you’re getting Sterling that for Christmas! So she’ll be reminded of you ever time she cuddles it close as she goes to sleep...” 

Ezequiel chuckled. “Hannah B. with the deep insights. I like it. I—” he motioned at Hannah B. “—we like this you. She’s taken away the edge. Don’t get me wrong, you’ll still cut a fool with the same ease as a Masamune blade would, but... you’re somewhat less bitey. Most of the time.” 

April understood what he meant, and thinking back to how she’d handled the decorations, handled her _friends_ , she felt the urge to be honest with them. “I’m sorry for being such a—” 

“April starring as Queen B,” he offered with a smile. 

Hannah B. sighed. “I still don’t understand that reference. Is it from a movie?” 

“Sterling told me I should be nicer to you, you know.” 

“She told you what to do and she’s still breathing? Yeah, you love her.” 

“It’s more... like,” April fought off the part of her that was screaming at her to shut up, to not let anyone know these things, that she was just opening herself up for being taken advantage of. “She gives these me little nudges and offers up suggestions. She’s ridiculous sometimes, but she’s just so good. It might be rubbing off on me.” 

Ezequiel just bit his tongue, allowing April to open up without him making a sarcastic comment, just this once. 

“I like this new me too. Being happy is... different. But good. Everything about being with Sterling is good. Maybe I hoped in secret that I would one day have something like this. Even in my wildest dreams I could never imagine something remotely this good, though. She makes me feel things I doubted I was even capable of feeling. 

“There are times when I just want to walk up to strangers in the street and just scream, ‘I love this girl!’ at them.” April blushed, surprised at the words spilling out of her mouth. “Obviously, I would never do that because it would be horribly rude and intrusive. But that’s what being in love with Sterling Wesley is like. You can’t believe something so good and pure is in your life, so you want everybody to know, like the more people know, the less likely it is to one day go away. I never want this to end.” 

“Do you think it might?” Hannah B. asked quietly. 

“No. I do not. I can’t predict the future. What I do know what I want it to be like and with whom I want to share it. This might seem crazy to you. You might object and say that young love is always intense. Trust me, I know intense and this is different. Whenever I think ahead—and I try not to, because I enjoy being in the here and now, with Sterling—I’m filled with this warm certainty and calm. I love her and she loves me. As long as we have each other, very little else matters.” 

"Your valedictorian speech is going to be incredible," Ezequiel said proudly, making April laugh. “You practically glow when you talk about her, you know that?” 

“I-I may have thought about this for quite a while.” April would have to make sure she thanked Sterling for this particular nudge. Ezequiel and Hannah B. had stood by her for so long, been such great friends that they deserved to know everything about her. She might not have a Blair in her corner, but she had these two, and that was just as good, if not better. 

“About Sterling, you mean,” Ezequiel teased, giving her a nudge. 

“No, well yes, but specifically about sharing this with you guys. I’ve always been guarded in the past, but this is now, and will continue on into the future.” 

Suddenly jingling bells erupted from Baby Yoda and Hannah B. squealed excitedly. “This must be on the playlist!” 

“What the...” Ezequiel said, his brow furrowed. 

“It’s Dominick the Donkey!” 

“What is it with you and the animal themed songs, Hannah B.?” 

April smiled, closing her laptop and said to Hannah B., “How about you take a break and I’ll do some scrolling?” 

“Okay, sure... do you want some snacks? I’ll get some snacks.” Hannah B. jumped off April’s bed and sprinted downstairs. 

“She’s a wacky one, but I really do love her.” 

April nodded, smiling happily. “I love you both...”


	9. "Mistletoe"

“Sterling! Have you seen my lax stick?” Blair came running down the stairs and into the kitchen, caring not one bit that Sterling was having breakfast and there were no sticks, lax or otherwise, to be seen. 

Sterling barely registered her sister’s frantic distress. Breakfast was supposedly the most important meal of the day, vital to overall wellness and ensuring your brain functioned properly, which was most certainly not the case with Sterling right now. The only thing in her brain that was working at all was the part that kept obsessing over April Stevens. 

“What? No, I haven’t seen it,” Sterling replied, not sure what the ‘it’ even referred to, but that didn’t matter, because it was true no matter what. 

“I need to find it. We shoulda been outta here five minutes ago.” She eyed her sister suspiciously, sitting there absentmindedly stirring her bowl of frosted flakes and… OJ. “Dude, what the hell? Are you having that for breakfast?” 

“What? No, I—” Sterling looked down and realized her mistake. Apparently her brain was so frazzled that it mistook a carton of orange juice for a milk jug. She pushed the orange mess away. “I’m not really hungry.” 

“Can’t say I blame you. That looks gross. What were you thinking? Is this some weird TikTok challenge that I don’t know about?” 

“What? No. It was an honest mistake.” 

“Mistaking milk and OJ? Not noticing the difference in taste and not to mention color? If I was stupid enough to believe that next you’ll try to sell me a bridge. What’s wrong?” 

“Not here, Blair. We’ll talk in the car.” 

************************* 

“Dude! Seriously, what’s wrong with you. You’ve been alternating between zoning out and being in a mood for, like, days. Ever since--” Blair grinned, eyebrows waggling suggestively. “Oh, I see, she was _that_ good? Can’t wait for her to get another taste of your cookie?” 

“Blair, can you not. Just this one time. I’m not in the mood.” 

“You finally got some and you’re _grumpy_? I thought boning was supposed to release tension, not create more of it.” 

Sterling dropped her chin to give her twin a _Wait for it_ -look and waited for Blair to connect the dots. 3-2-1. 

“You can’t be serious! You’re telling me you snuck back in with tinsel stuck in your freaking zipper and somehow you’re still not throwing down with Stevens?” 

“I’ve told you nothing so far. But yes, now I am: we haven’t slept together,” Sterling confirmed with a deep sigh. “Not yet at least.” 

“I can’t believe you let me think you guys finally did it.” Blair puffed. “That’s a serious breach of the sister contract.” 

“We had this really cool talk. Like, a heart-to-heart. You know, about sex… and when. Because we both want to. And we agreed that neither of us want the first time we make love,” Sterling glared at her sister, knowing full well what she thought of using that term, “should be special. Not in a messy storage room at school.” 

“You were about to get busy at school? Nice. Maybe next time. When it’s just boning and not some magical first time making love.” 

“She made some great points.” 

“Not that I don’t appreciate Little Miss Perfect and her attention to detail, but that still does not account for the tinsel.” 

“Things got a little out of hand. Once we talked—like one moment we were kissing and the next, my khakis were undone and…” 

“What? Tongue? Fingers. Tell me. Did Stevens think tribbing would be the way to go for your first time?” 

"And then she just STOPPED! I mean, it was for a really sweet reason and it’s not like I don’t want our first time to be not-special.” Sterling made a face. “Not not-special. But that was borderline cruel." 

"Oh, so you didn't... Like coitus interruptus? Eww." 

"That's what I'm saying, Blair. She stopped, before…” Sterling trailed off, thinking back to that moment. She’d been touched by April’s sentiment. Grateful even. But that was before her body and brain had rebelled. “She didn't, you know, _get me off_. And then I couldn't even get myself off, because... it just wasn't the same as with April. Nothing feels the same when April is not there." 

"TMI! But good for you for finally joining the 21st century and accepting yourself as a sexual being. Self-love is love. Exploring what you like is healthy. Even if what you like is April," Blair laughed at her sister’s shocked expression. 

“TMI? My sister is accusing me of TMI for discussing my frustration openly. The sister who once acted out the battle plan for her next sexual encounter. In the school library! Everybody got an earful of TMI that day. The same sister who got me a vibrator! 

“Hey! Not cool bringing Miles into this.” 

“Sorry! Sorry! Sorry! I wasn’t trying to invoke Miles or imply anything. It’s just… I’m so frigging frustrated!” 

“And I’m just saying... if you’d made use of that vibrator when April left you high and wet,” Blair gave herself a mental high-five, “you might not be in this state right now.” 

Sterling just sank deeper into her seat, not really eager to discuss whatever she might or might get up to once the lights are out and she can curl up under her comforter with only thoughts of April and April’s lips and hair and… other body parts to occupy her mind. 

“Have you, like, talked after this?” 

“Of course we have. You sat with us during lunch. We all talked.” 

“Sterl, you know what I mean. Have you talked about _this_? You said there was a when. Which, B-T-dubs, better be soon, or you might combust. Actually burst into flame. Huh. I guess we finally know the cause of spontaneous human combustion. I can’t wait to go to Stockholm for my Nobel Prize.” 

“No,” Sterling whined. “She was with the rest of the Trinity all day after school yesterday. We FaceTimed before bed, but it didn’t seem appropriate to bring it up.” 

“You know what would’ve been appropriate? Some whispered sweet nothings followed by a whole lot of dirty ones uttered in a tone of voice I’m not sure April is capable of. So you could finally get some sweet release and the rest of us be spared this… this horny mess.” 

Sterling just groaned. Her sister was not wrong. She was a horny mess and all she could think of was April and April’s lips and… 

Today was going to be a long day. 

***************************************** 

Sterling clutched her books close to her chest as she walked down the hall. She was on autopilot as she pivoted through the crowd of students. There were a few apologies muttered when she accidentally bumped into some random person, followed by a few scathing insults from Blair about how they need to watch where they’re going. Her head was in a fog. Caught up in the thoughts of April’s lips, her hands, her body. 

“Hey, you’re really going to walk right past me?” 

Sterling snapped from her haze at the sound of April’s voice. She was so deep in thought of everything she was missing; she didn’t even realize how close she was to her girlfriend’s locker. “Oh, babe, I’m sorry,” she apologized, taking a step closer to remove herself from oncoming traffic. “I’m not really-awake-I guess.” 

April looked her over, concern filling the shorter girls features. “Are you okay? Are you not feeling well?” 

Sterling opened her mouth to respond, but Blair’s voice came out instead. 

“She’s got MissingAprilStevensitis,” Blair offered, amusement lacing her tone. She raised an eyebrow. “You wouldn’t happen to have a cure for that, would you, Stevens?” 

Sterling clenched her jaw, lightly nudging her sister. “Don’t listen to her,” she said, pausing momentarily to mull over her words. “I mean, it’s true… but don’t listen to her.” 

“Aw, honey, I missed you too,” April cooed, taking a step closer to her. She rested her hand on Sterling’s cheek, caressing her thumb against her skin. “And I really wish I could stay and chat a little longer, but I have a meeting with Mrs. Collins about my college essay.” She pushed herself up on her tip toes so she could meet Sterling’s eyes directly. “I love you. We’ll talk at lunch, okay?” She placed a quick peck on Sterling’s lips then turned and hurried off down the hall. 

Blair made an unimpressed noise, thrusting her thumb toward April’s retreating form. “You haven’t had any physical contact since storeroom day and that’s all you get?” 

“She’s in a hurry,” Sterling muttered, continuing toward their homeroom. 

“Excuses,” Blair teased, but halted when she saw the pitiful expression on her sister’s face followed by an even more pitiful whine. She rested her hand on Sterling’s shoulder, giving her a sympathetic pat. “Man, I knew you had it bad, but this… this is bad.” 

“No kidding,” 

They continued on their way toward homeroom, the silence finally falling around them. Sterling was grateful for the momentary pause. The twin’s filed into homeroom and Sterling stumbled, attempting to climb into her seat. Blair stifled a laugh and held up her hands apologetically when Sterling shot her a look as they settled into their seats. 

The bell rung signaling the start of class and their teacher immediately began going over important items for the next week. Midterms were coming up and Sterling should really have been paying attention, but she wasn’t. Her teacher’s voice sounded muffled and her brain was already clouded with too many thoughts of her girlfriend. April’s hands and in places she’d barely ventured to before. 

Sterling could still feel the heat of April’s fingertips against her neck. 

She anxiously scratched at the back of her neck trying to distract herself from her reflections. It wasn’t working though. Nothing was working. Knowing how close they came, how there was a promise of when opposed to if was driving her insane. Top all of that off with the fact that the only physical attention she’d gotten from her girlfriend since then was a hurried peck in the middle of a crowed hallway. 

There was no way she was going to survive. 

Sterling jumped when the bell sounded again and noticed Blair gathering her things from the corner of her eye. Panic overtook her, certain that she missed something rather important. “Is homeroom over already?” 

Blair snorted a laugh, pulling her backpack over her shoulder. “Yeah,” she responded, picking up the last of her things. She watched as Sterling scrambled to gather her own books. “Dude, were you not paying attention?” 

“No, I wasn’t paying attention!” Sterling barked, scooping up the last of her books. She followed Blair out of the room, resting her hand on her forehead. “I should go home. I seriously can’t concentrate on any-“ 

The words had barely left her mouth before she was practically run over by someone going entirely too fast. Two strong hands grabbed her shoulders, thankfully keeping her upright. Once she was able to process what had just happened, she caught the flustered, unnerved expression covering Luke’s face as he helped her steady her stance. 

“Sterl, I’m so sorry-I didn’t mean to run you over-Lorna-I had to get-“ 

“Woah, woah, Luke, slow down,” Blair requested, resting her hand on his shoulder. “What is happening?” 

Sterling stepped out of his hold, adjusting the books he almost knocked completely out of her hands. “Yeah, Luke, why are you all… rattled?” she asked, as if she was one to talk. The only difference between them was that he actually seemed a little more coherent. 

Luke looked like an absolute mess. His hair was mussed, and his shirt was half untucked. It hung out of his pants like a tail. “Well, I went to see Coach because I had some questions about some of the new guys on the team-“ He swallowed hard, slapping his hands against his sides before resting them against his hips. “And Lorna-well, she stuck mistletoe all over the place trying to catch Franklin off guard and I-“ He whimpered, releasing a heavy breath from his nose. “-didn’t look up when I was walking out of Coach’s office and she… she caught me.” 

Blair barked a laugh, her brown eyes widened. “She kissed you?” 

Luke clamped his mouth shut, nodding his head up and down rapidly. His brow knitted together, and he leaned into the twins. “She shoved her tongue in my mouth-“ 

Blair raised her hand quickly, covering her mouth to stifle her laughter. 

“So-“ Sterling tilted her head to the side; a curious expression overcame her features. “She, um, hid them, like, all over the school?” 

Blair snapped her attention toward Sterling. “Sterl…” she said, dragging out the word in a warning tone. 

Sterling kept her focus on Luke, waving her sister off. “Like, are they easy to find-or-?” 

Luke shook his head. “No, not really. I’m thinking she put them everywhere Franklin would be.” He glanced down the hall and caught a flash of reddish blonde hair. “OH, she’s coming! I gotta go!” 

“Wait, Luke!” 

Luke was gone before Sterling could even reach out to stop him. 

“Shoot,” she cursed, stomping her foot. 

“Sterling,” Blair said, sternly as her sister turned to look at her. “Don’t even think of doing what I think you’re going to do.” 

Sterling squinted confused. “I’m not thinking of doing anything.” 

Blair eyed her knowing as they continued down the hall to their next classes. She kept her eyes on Sterling watching as her sister fidgeted with her hands. Each time they passed an open classroom, Sterling would dart her eyes scanning over the frames. She also took what she thought was an inconspicuous glance inside the room itself. 

“Listen, Sterl, normally I’m not one to curve your horndog activities-“ 

Sterling turned away from her scan of the classrooms. “What are you talking about?” 

“Please, Sterl, you know exactly what I’m talking about.” Blair took hold of her sister’s arm, dragging her out of the crowd of students to an empty classroom. When Sterling immediately looked up, Blair flashed a pointed look. “That. That’s what I’m talking about.” She took a step closer. “You look like you’re scanning the rooftops for snipers.” 

Sterling furrowed her brow. “That’s a flawed analogy.” 

“It is not.” 

“Mistletoe and snipers are two completely different things.” 

“I didn’t mean the item was the same, I meant-“ Blair silenced herself abruptly. She closed her eyes, waving her hand in front of her face as she breathed in and out, gathering her thoughts. Her eyes opened again, and she met her sister’s confused blue gaze. “Sterling, you can’t push your girlfriend under mistletoe to curve whatever lady boner you’ve got permanently erected.” 

“Ew, Blair.” 

“You know how April feels about PDA. Hooking up in a storeroom behind closed doors is one thing. Making out in an open classroom-“ 

“It might be empty…” Sterling argued, pouting slightly. 

Blair cocked her head to the side, giving her sister a telling look. 

Sterling rolled her eyes and sighed, defeated. “Okay, fine. You’re right.” 

“Okay…” Blair replied, dragging out the word with heavy uncertainty. “So, you’re not going to drag your girl around on some wild mistletoe hunt.” 

Sterling pursed her lips and shook her head ‘no.’. 

Blair studied her, skeptically but seemed to accept her response… for now. “We should get going or we’re going to be late for—” the sound of the bell ringing cut her off and she closed her eyes with a heavy exhale “—class.” 

Without another word, the twins bolted out of the empty classroom and down the hall…. 

******************************************* 

Sterling and Blair walked into the cafeteria clutching their pre-packaged Willingham branded lunch boxes. 

“Are you sure you want to sit with them today. I mean, given…” 

“Blair, I can’t very well snub my girlfriend. There would be… talking. From other students! Gossip! Although I’d imagine that April would want to know why I did that too.” 

“Ten-Four good buddy. Just chill. I’ll be right here. Everything will be okay. As long as you keep it in your pants.” She’s paused. “Keep your pants zipped up? Nah, doesn’t have the same ring.” 

“I’ll be good. I can get through lunch.” 

“Can you though? 

“I can,” Sterling said through gritted teeth. 

When they reached the table, April turned around and gave Sterling such a dazzling smile she had to fight back the urge to climb into her lap, no matter how awkward the resulting position would be. It didn’t help that April was wearing her white button-down with the orange Willingham west. Almost as if she knew that was Sterling’s favorite look of hers, and intimately tied to… her awakening. 

“Hey guys.” Sterling gave a weak wave and groaned when Blair hip-checked her, pushing her away from April and closer to an empty chair. She turned it around and sat down, hugging the back tightly. 

April tilted her head. “Is everything okay? Lunch began ten minutes ago. We were starting to wonder—” 

“Luke needed our help,” Blair said, trying to steer the conversation away from the real reason they were late for lunch. “Apparently Lorna ambushed the poor boy using the mistletoe defense to justify her actions.” 

“Mistletoe?” Ezequiel asked. 

Sterling nodded. “She’s got them hidden away all over school, trying to catch Franklin off-guard.” 

“I do admire that girl’s dedication to macking, even if that seems needlessly elaborate. Why don’t she just carry a piece around with her and dangle it over his head? That kind of ambush is a time-honored tradition.” 

“Sexually harassing somebody should not be a tradition. It’s wrong,” Blair stated. 

April nodded and said, “She’s right. It’s barbaric. Tradition or no.” 

“Aww, I think the whole mistletoe thing can be sweet. Like, obviously not the way Lorna is doing it, that should be stopped. But two people in love sharing a seasonal kiss under a mistletoe?’ 

April captured Sterling’s eyes. “Honey, I’m not going to kiss you under the mistletoe.”. 

Sterling jumped back. “I wasn’t thinking that! Honestly. I know how you feel about _inappropriate_ public displays of affection.” 

“I knew you’d understand,” April smiled softly, reaching out to put her hand on top of Sterling’s, giving it a gentle squeeze. 

Sterling hoped the full-body shudder April’s touch resulted in wasn’t too obvious, but that hope died an ugly death once she heard the loud screech her chair made when the shifting of her bodyweight caused it to move away from April. Sterling smiled sheepishly, quickly taking too-big a bite of her lunch. If her mouth was full of food, it couldn’t very well be filled with April’s tongue. 

When April gave her another soft squeeze along with a questioning look, she swallowed her food—in order to make room—so quickly that she nearly choked on a grape. Sterling coughed and spluttered. “Sorry. I skipped breakfast, so I was really, really hungry.” 

Blair glared at her sister. “Oh, we all know what you hunger for.” 

*************************************** 

The last hour of school was complete torture. 

Normally, Sterling welcomed the warmth of her girlfriend’s thigh pressed up against her own as they sat quietly side by side in Bible Studies. It was the one class they shared where they actually sat beside one another instead of being made to stare at the back of each other’s heads. Sometimes they would chance little touches and write notes on the corner of their notepads to one another, but Sterling was so distracted by the way April bounced her leg up and down which caused an unnecessary friction between them. 

When class finally ended, they gathered their things and walked together out of the room. April intertwined their fingers and leaned into Sterling. The heat from her touch rushed through Sterling’s body instantly and she swallowed hard trying to clear the dryness from her throat. She chanced a look at April who rewarded the action with a beautiful, perfect smile. 

It bothered her that she even found April’s teeth attractive. 

“My mom invited you to dinner on Saturday,” April said, resting her free hand on Sterling’s forearm as she guided them through the hallway. “I thought since you’re coming over anyway to study, you could stay for dinner too.” 

Sterling stared at her profile momentarily awestruck. She blinked, bringing herself back to reality and nodded. “Uh huh. Sure.” 

April looked forward, completely unaware of Sterling’s yearning expression. “She said she would make your favorite.” She chuckled lightly. “I swear my mother has a crush on you.” 

Sterling half laughed, and it sounded distant in her ears. Apparently she wasn’t the only one because April turned to her, brow creased. 

“What was that laugh?” 

“What laugh?” 

“That weird, broken high pitched sound you just made.” 

Sterling blushed, reaching up with her free hand to tuck a strand of hair nervously behind her ear. “It was just a laugh.” 

April wasn’t buying it. Her expression made that clear. She stopped suddenly, guiding Sterling off to the side. “What’s going on with you?” 

Sterling tried her best to look as clueless as possible. “Babe, I don’t know what you’re talking about.” 

“You’ve been really off all day,” April noted. “Is something wrong? Are we okay?” 

Sterling’s jaw dropped at the implication. “What? Yes, of course we’re okay. We’re better than okay. We’re amazing,” she defended quickly. “It’s-“ She sighed, slumping her shoulders. “It’s nothing. I’m fine.” 

“Sterling.” 

“April.” 

Repeating her name was supposed to lighten the sudden tension filling the small space between them. And it was definitely not the same type of tension that had kept Sterling in a fog for the entire day. This was different. She noticed April set her jaw and release a short, frustrated breath through her nose. The shorter girl looked around momentarily then grabbed Sterling’s hand, leading her inside an adjacent classroom. 

Sterling tried not to focus on April’s grip around her wrist and the way she pulled her forward, gently placing her in the middle of the room. 

April stood directly in front of her and crossed her arms against her chest. “I’m serious, Sterling. What is going on?” 

Sterling opened her mouth, stammering over a few variations of the truth. She sighed, frustrated with her sudden inability to form a coherent sentence. “I—“ She released a low growl, running her hand through her hair. “I-I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you all day. I mean, I’m always thinking about you but-this is different. It’s throwing me off and-“ 

April stepped forward, reaching out and resting her hands against Sterling’s stomach. “Did I do something wrong?” 

The worried look on April’s face made Sterling’s heart clench inside her chest. She reached out, resting her hands on her girlfriend’s hips, bringing her closer. “No, babe, never. It’s just me.” She lightly licked her lips, shifting her gaze downward. “After what happened in the storage room and then not being able to really touch you or spend time with you after that-“ She shrugged her shoulder, meeting April’s eyes again. “I missed you. And-I missed your touch… a lot.” 

April gently grasped Sterling’s fingers in her hands. “I’m going to kiss you now,” April said, noticing Lorna’s landmine-disguised-as-mistletoe. “Not because of the mistletoe we’re standing under. Because I want to. Because it’s been two days since... And we’ve barely had a moment to ourselves ever since. Don’t think for a second you’re alone in this, Sterl. I know what you’re going through because I feel pretty much the same way. I’m simply better at compartmentalizing.” 

She ran her thumbs over the knuckles of the soft hands in hers. “After what nearly happened in the storage room, I’m no longer certain I can resist temptation, so… Just a kiss, nothing more. You have to behave, okay? 

“I can do that,” Sterling assured her. 

April gave her a look. 

“For you,” she nodded gravely. “Anything.” 

“Good. Hands behind your back.” She chuckled when Sterling hesitated, confusion playing across her face. “We don’t want you getting handsy. No grabbing my butt.” 

Sterling whined, and April couldn’t stop herself from laughing until she met Sterling’s eyes and was reminded of the look she’d given her in the storage room. 

April swallowed. “I know a kiss isn’t much. It’s not what we both want and yet, it’ll have to be enough for now. I promise you that our when is coming… and coming soon.” 

She moved closer. “Just like you will be,” she said, her voice dropping to a whisper, while raising her hands to cradle Sterling’s cheeks, the tips of her fingers slowly caressing, “under my fingers and my tongue.” 

The kiss April gave her gorgeous blonde girlfriend was unlike any other they’d shared so far. It was a kiss filled with promise and hope, and more than anything, the burning desire they both shared. April’s tongue filled Sterling with hope and longing for the day when the promises it made would finally be fulfilled. 

Sterling briefly thought of how easy it would be to lose balance, just enough to send them both slamming against the wall, setting the snowball rolling down the hill, picking up speed and growing bigger by the second until there was no stopping it. 

But she’d made a promise to behave, even though it took every ounce of self-control she could muster not to start pawing at that glorious, tight backside. She moaned against April’s warm lips, aware of her body’s response, too much for anything that could be described as ‘just a kiss’. Nothing with April was ever ‘just’. And she realized just how inadequate this was to quench the need that had started in the storage room. _When_ had better be right around the corner. Like, waiting for them on the other side of the door. 

She was doomed. Today has been bad. Tomorrow would be worse.


	10. "Candy Canes.."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since Blair feels tik tok is an art... 
> 
> We have included a tik tok challenge to this story: "Pretend to fall asleep on FaceTime and see how your girlfriend reacts..."
> 
> What we did with it actually happened in one of the challenges... 
> 
> (We felt like we needed to clarify this after a comment we received...)
> 
> If you have tik tok.. check out the challenge cause it is SUPER cute... 
> 
> ************************************************************************************

“Seriously, where is everybody?” April looked around the room, fretting about the manpower she suddenly lacked. “We’ve been at this for an hour and a half. At least you’re here. Still,” she said and gave Blair a curt nod. 

The brunette one doffed her cap and smiled sweetly. She took a bite out of the peppermintery goodness she was holding. “You’re welcome, Stevens.” 

April sighed. “I’m sorry, I really appreciate you helping out. Especially since nobody else is.” 

“Hey! What am I, chopped duck liver?” Ezequiel said. 

“Of course not. You’re my best friends,” April waved at Ezequiel and Hannah B. “And you _know_ I appreciate you.” 

“Especially when you take us for granted and we show up anyway.” 

“Never. Not anymore, at least.” 

“You’re such a softie now. I love it.” 

“And I love you, Hannah B., but that doesn’t mean I won’t tell you to hurry up and grab those candy canes and get decorating before Blair eats all of them,” April said and looked pointedly at Blair, sucking on yet another candy cane. 

“It’s not my fault,” Blair mumbled, not caring enough about how garbled she sounded to remove the candy cane from her mouth. “They’re tiny. Nothing like proper candy canes.” 

“I don’t care. The party is tomorrow. There’s not enough time to order another box if you finish them all.” 

“Another box?! Are you kidding me?” Blair walked over to the box and made a show of being amazed at its contents. “There’s gotta be a couple of thousand candy canes here. I need Ellen to hook me up with her supplier.” 

April sighed, not wanting to rile Blair up any further. “Fine. But please, stay away from the bigger ones. There’s a limited supply of those.” 

“Whatever. Sugar is sugar.” 

April shuddered, remembering how Blair bounced around the Wesley kitchen when they were baking. “Actually, maybe you should just stop.” 

“Whu?” Blair looked back up from the box, another candy cane already dangling from the side of her mouth, hiding her full hands behind her back. 

“There’s an extra box of non-sugary decorations over by the tree. Unpack that and I’ll join you in a bit to decide where you should hang them.” 

“I can show you where to hang them,” Blair muttered under her breath and dumped a stack of candy canes in Sterling’s lap before stomping off. 

* * *

Sterling looked back when she heard the angry footfall of Blair heading as far away from April as she could while still staying in the same room. And she saw April roll her eyes and try to shake off what Sterling knew was annoyance. It was practically an autonomous response for when those two interacted. But when April turned her way, she quickly looked back down and grabbed a candy cane and tossed it into her mouth, feeling like a petulant child who didn’t want to be scolded. 

Indeed, Sterling sat alone on one of the large leather couches that adorned the Fellowship room in Willingham Academy. For something so plush, they were surprisingly uncomfy. Much like many other things about Willingham and the communities surrounding the school, appearance was considered above everything else; it was just a shame that what these couches were exuding was whatever an old English gentlemen’s club would. Probably money and status if Sterling could take a guess. 

So, appropriate, really. 

Considering the state, she found herself in, _had_ found herself in for the last 72 hours, she was almost grateful that her body constantly found itself twisting and turning in an attempt to reach the comfort level it desired; every little poke and prod the couch provided interrupted her brain and forced it to—if only momentarily—focus on something other than April Stevens. 

She’d tried to focus on helping out, but no matter how hard she tried, the sight of April bossing everybody else around sent her reeling. So, she’d retreated to the couches and hoped April would be too busy to notice she wasn’t exactly pulling her weight right now. Sterling tried to keep an even keel, focusing on not letting this turn into a repeat performance of what had taken place a few days previous. 

April, current bane of her existence, as well as love of her life, and no doubt the cutest little Christian lesbian currently existing in the northern hemisphere was busying herself directing what remained of the Willingham Christmas Party Planning Committee—that would be Sterling, Blair, and the rest of the Trinity, and honestly, Blair being in attendance had surprised and shocked everybody—in an attempt to finish preparing the Fellowship room for tomorrow’s function. 

Sterling shook her head. She wasn’t being fair. April wasn’t to blame for this, though the little stunt she pulled yesterday certainly hadn’t helped. So desperate had Sterling been for a kiss following their little adventure in the storage room, she had failed to consider the ramifications of there being only one kiss, and nothing more. One kiss. One wonderful, searing kiss. And a whispered promise. 

No, April definitely had her share of the blame resting firmly on her shoulders. Sterling sat on the couch, trying extremely hard to trick her brain into thinking of anything other than the torrent of images April’s words had unleashed. Not that Sterling was a prude. Nor an innocent. Sex was not a new ingredient in the stew that made up her life. Great, food similes. 

She grabbed another one of the candy canes Blair had unceremoniously showered her with, carefully unwrapping it before putting it in her mouth. 

She’d even considered taking Blair’s advice, which never was a good sign. But following what April has said yesterday her desperation had reached new levels. Man, the sugar really hit the spot, but they _were_ indeed tiny. She opened another one. Good things in a small package. Like April. Sterling groaned and cursed her brain. 

* * *

Blair threw her arms out. “This box is a mess! Whoever packed this must’ve been a real hurry. It’s just a freaking disaster.” She started rummaging through the contents, trying to pick out the fragile items first instead of just dumping everything on the floor and risking things breaking. She glanced over at April, knowing she would not be happy if that happened. 

“Yo, Stevens! Where did you say you got this? Because if Ellen paid for this, she should request a refund. I’m pretty sure the garlands have pieces broken off and the tinsel, oh the tinsel…” 

“Uh, what tinsel?” April said without looking over at Blair. 

“There’s more tinsel? I love tinsel!” Hannah B. squeaked. 

Blair grabbed a handful and made a disgusted face when she was greeted by something resembling a glittery, golden ball. She considered her options for a second or two before tossing it to Hannah B. “It’s all wadded up. Knock yourself out. I can’t deal with that.” 

Hannah B. bounced happily and clapped loudly before catching the ball of tinsel, causing everybody to stop and look at her. “What? Why are you looking at me like that?” 

“Hannah B., I know you find tinsel very exciting, but what was that clap?” Ezequiel asked. “It wasn’t the excited, giddy clapping you’d see April do when she managed to talk a teacher into giving us extra homework.” 

“I never do that!” April protested. 

“Or when she talked Sterling into something. Then she was extra giddy.” 

April just glared and turned away, knowing her ears were turning red. 

With April distracted, Blair saw her chance to sneak a fresh candy cane from her back pocket and start munching before diving back into the box. 

“It’s just a game I used to play as a kid. Clap and Catch. You never did that? You toss a ball back and forth and you have to clap before catching it,” Hannah B. explained. “We should play that some time. It’s fun, and it helps improve your motor skills.” 

“We already have motor skills. We get to prove that every week in P.E. And we’re not kids anymore, so there are more fun games to play.” Ezequiel channeled the brunette one and waggled his eyebrows meaningfully. 

Blair laughed loudly and gave him an appreciative wink. “That’s right. I know exactly what you mean.” She hauled the next ball of tinsel out of the box, smirking to herself; this time she threw a silver tinsel ball at April. “And I bet I know who else does too.” 

Unlike Hannah B., April didn’t clap. She didn’t even try to catch the tinsel flying at her, opting to step out of the path of the projectile, moving towards Blair. 

“What gives, Stevens? I was counting on you to untangle that mess, so it doesn’t get stuck anywhere… incriminating.” Blair locked eyes with April and smirked, stopping April dead in her tracks. 

At this point they were halfway to developing their own, antagonistic version of Twin Vision, so April knew exactly what Blair meant. She knew what that look meant. Blair knew. And April’s reaction had revealed that she knew what Blair knew, and how infuriating she found it. All of it. 

April was no fool, especially not concerning Sterling’s relationship to her twin. They kept no secrets, so even this would one day be a topic of discussion between them. But for now, April wanted it to be between her and Sterling. They’d been waiting for this for too long to have Blair buzzing around their ears like an annoying gnat, ruining a perfect moment. 

One they would never get to share again. 

She tried to stop herself, but Blair’s smirk was too smug to be ignored. April leaned into Blair’s glare and willed herself closer. “That’s enough. Tease me all you want, but your sister is sitting right over there, and I know you don’t want to hurt her.” 

Blair didn’t say anything in return. 

“Blair, really,” April stepped up to Sterling’s annoying, infuriating twin, “What the hell is wrong with you today? This isn’t you.” 

“Uh, maybe it’s the sugar talking. I’ve had a lot of these today,” she said, playing with the striped treat still in her mouth. 

“Don’t think it’s time to stop then?” 

“You make an excellent point, Stevens.” She bit off a piece before slipping the candy cane from her between her lips. 

“Blair!” 

“I’m stopping. I am. I can stop anytime I want to.” 

April made a move for the cane in Blair’s hand, only to be easily swatted away. 

“Don’t you dare! This is mine. Mine, April!” 

* * *

Sterling was still on the couch, idly scrolling through her phone, trying to finally solve her gift conundrum. The perfect gift for April was still eluding her, and the closer they got to Christmas, the harder she found it to consider anything other than the gift that had originally come to her: the promise ring. 

When she heard the two most people in her life bickering like a pair of bratty teens, Sterling finally put the phone away and turned to look at what had caused all this commotion. Blair was probably needling April again like she had a tendency to, but what surprised Sterling was that her girlfriend had finally taken whatever bait Blair had dangled in front of her face. 

Seeing them both struggling over a tiny candy cane was not exactly the first thing that had come to mind, but when she saw Blair twist the sticky candy out of April’s grasp and wield it like a prison shiv would be wielded in a cafeteria fight, she sprang into action. 

“Hey! You two! Stop that nonsense, _right now_!” She jumped off the couch and stalked over to the bickering pair, grabbing a candy cane of her own on the way. 

“She started it!” Blair pointed her candy shiv at April. 

‘Sis. Seriously. Quit it.” 

“Even if she didn’t, this is _mine_!” 

Sterling put up her own cane against Blair’s and snickered when she realized just how tiny a mini cane was in comparison. “You shouldn’t have brought a knife to a sword fight.” 

Blair started backing away. “I have skills. What do you have? Tinsel chainmail?” 

“Nobody needs to get hurt. Just put that tiny thing away before I have to—” another regular sized candy cane came flying out of nowhere, falling into Blair’s outstretched hand. 

“Hannah B.!” April bristled. “Don’t encourage them!” 

Ezequiel just shook his head and started walking toward the doors. “Nah, not going to be a part in this.” 

Hannah B. gave him a quick wave goodbye and turned to April. “It wasn’t a fair fight. Now it is.” 

April turned around and found the twins had moved away from her, cautiously circling around the couches, staring each other down. Hannah B. came over to stand by her side. “What are they doing?” 

“I’m not sure. I guess they’re trying to… get a read on one another.” 

“No, with their canes. Like, if this is a sword fight, why are they both sucking on their canes— swords.“ 

April narrowed her eyes. “Sterl, what are you doing? Can’t you please stop this silliness?” 

Sterling waved her off. 

Instead, Blair was the one to answer: “What does it look like? I’m making sure to sharpen my blade. Here, let me prove my point.” She held her cane aloft to demonstrate the point she’d managed to whittle it down to using her mouth. 

April gasped. “ Sterl, please, you could poke an eye out if you’re not careful! And I happen to like your eyes, so stop this immediately!” 

Sterling could barely hear April’s pleas, so focused was she on finally winning one fight with Blair. They completed another lap around the couches, refusing to look away, both of them determined to leave no openings to be exploited. 

The stalemate seemed destined to go on forever, so Sterling decided to use the element of surprise to her advantage. She placed a foot on the back of the couch, attempting to use her height to get enough leverage so she could leap at her sister and emerge from this victorious. Unfortunately, she hadn’t taken into account the way the padding would sink away when she put her weight on it, so instead of a gracious leap, she tumbled towards her sister like a huge klutz, arms flailing wildly as she tried to regain the tiniest shred of balance. 

Instead, she crashed into Blair and when she reached out to break her fall, her hand caught on Blair’s still brandished candy sword, leaving her palm with a pepperminty scratch down the middle. 

April watched in horror as Sterling disappeared behind the couch and she was already halfway there when she heard Sterling gasp and say, “Ow! You cut me!” 

April sprinted the last few feet and kneeled down next to Sterling. “Show me! Are you okay? Where did she cut you?” 

“My palm… Look, there’s a huge gash across it. I can’t believe my own sister would cut me.” 

April nearly panicked when she saw the red line running across the palm of her love. She gently took Sterling’s hand in hers and tried to assess the damage, prodding and pulling gentle to make sure no tendons had been injured. It took her a couple of seconds to realize what she was looking at. “Sterl, this is… nothing.” She used her fingertip to complete the X across Sterling’s palm that the candy cane had begun, licking the red fluid from her finger. “It barely broke the skin.” 

Sterling looked up at her sheepishly before flashing her girlfriend a goofy grin. 

“Seriously though, what made you do this? Did you think this was a good idea?” 

“Normally I’d say no, but I’m on my 14th candy cane, so...” 

Blair sat up next to Sterling and groaned, “Hey, I’m fine too. Thanks for asking.” 

April just shot her a look and returned to tending to her girlfriend. 

******************************** 

April was so grateful to be home. 

Her day had ended up far more hectic than she initially anticipated. Between ensuring everything was ready to go for the party, keeping Blair from eating over a thousand candy canes, and patching up Sterling’s hand after she was unceremoniously stabbed with one of said canes, she was completely exhausted. All she wanted to do for the rest of the night was double-check her term paper and enjoy her nightly FaceTime call with Sterling. 

After dinner with her mother, spent listening to her gush about how excited she was to spend time with the couple tomorrow, she adjourned to her bedroom and prepared for the ending to her extremely long day. She went through her nightly routines, preparing for bed, even though she would most likely not be falling asleep anytime soon. But she did plan on dropping right onto her bed once she was done with her homework. 

So, better to be prepared then rushing around before sleep. 

April settled in at her desk, propping her phone up on the stand she purchased during one of her shopping sprees for Sterling’s Christmas present. She justified the purchase as her Christmas gift to herself. Everyone should be able to treat themselves every now and then. Even if it was something as simple as a phone stand. 

She popped open her laptop, scrolling through her documents searching for her term paper. She had completed it days ago, but there was always room for improvement. Not saying that her paper needed any, but you never know. Better safe than sorry. Double checking was the difference between an A and an A plus. 

Her attention pulled from her scrolling at the soft sound of Sterling’s FaceTime request The flutter of excitement coursed through her and she found herself sitting up straighter. She adjusted her appearance before catching herself, huffing a small laugh at her behavior. After all the time they’d been together, she still acted like she had to be in perfect form for Sterling. 

A girl who once complimented April after she’d gotten caught in a rainstorm that completely destroyed her appearance before their date. 

She slid her thumb across the screen accepting the call. The screen illuminated and the image of Sterling snuggled comfortably in her bed appeared. April instantly felt herself become an indescribable puddle of mush at the sight of her adorably sleepy girlfriend bundled up under her comforter trying to find a way to keep her phone balanced as she settled in for the night. 

“Hey, babe,” Sterling greeted, her voice thick with exhaustion. 

“Hey yourself,” April returned, a soft smile on her lips. She squinted trying to focus on Sterling as she moved her phone around. “Sterl, don’t you think you should have settled on a phone position before you called me?” 

“I thought I had then-“ The screen suddenly went black and a loud _Oow!_ pierced the darkness of the screen. 

Worry immediately shot through April and she shifted forward, reaching out for her phone. She really didn’t need another bout of injury and it was far too late for her to leave her house to go make sure her girlfriend didn’t knock herself out. Before she could question her girlfriend’s wellbeing, Sterling’s face came into view again. Her hand rested on her forehead as she rubbed a particularly red spot. 

April pressed her lips together, suppressing her laugh. “Are you okay?” 

Sterling pouted. “Yeah…” She shifted onto her side and reached out toward her dresser, steading her phone against something. 

“You should really consider getting a phone stand. I have one and it works great.” 

Sterling wrinkled her nose. She turned onto her stomach, tucking her arms under her pillow. “I don’t know. Those things are kinda weird and… OH!” Her sleepy blue eyes twinkled with an odd excitement. “What about a selfie stick? That way you can see me from all angles.” 

April made an amused noise. “And also gives some creative ways for you to drop your phone on your face.” 

Sterling frowned in thought. “Yeah, I guess that’s true.” She shrugged then settled back into her pillow. “So, whatcha doing?” 

“Besides talking to you?” 

“Mmhmm.” 

“I’m checking over my term paper. I want to make sure I didn’t miss anything important,” April responded, raising her eyebrow. “Speaking of which, did you finish yours?” 

Sterling nodded. “I did. Yesterday.” 

April hummed skeptically as she turned her attention to her laptop. “Did you proofread it, or did you say, ‘this is great’ and print it out?” 

A sleepy smirk crossed Sterling’s face and April tried to ignore the flutter the action caused her stomach to do. “You know me too well.” 

“Uh huh.” April glanced at her briefly, a half-smile on her lips as she returned her full focus to her laptop. 

A comfortable silence fell between them as they simply enjoyed each other’s presence. She caught glimpses of Sterling admiring her from the corner of her eye. She chuckled quietly each time she noticed Sterling fighting to stay awake. Her sugar high was obviously subsiding, and she was losing the battle to stay conscious. Almost the same way April was struggling to focus on proofreading her paper. She had unconsciously opened Amazon and found herself searching for a cute phone stand for Sterling. 

The sound of Ezequiel’s comment about her spoiling Sterling echoed through her mind and she immediately stopped, shifting her gaze back to the blonde again. Her heart flipped when Sterling brought her hand to her mouth, releasing an exceptionally large yawn. April released a small awe wishing she could reach through her phone and loving thread her fingers through Sterling’s soft blonde locks until she fell asleep. 

“Someone is tired,” April noted, lovingly. 

“Nah, I think it’s just the sugar high running its course,” Sterling responded, wrapping her words around another large yawn. Her tired expression turned sincere and a small, adorable pout took over. “Babe, I’m really sorry about the whole candy cane thing.” 

April melted from the overall sincerity within her girlfriend’s tone. “It’s okay, honey. It wasn’t _entirely_ your fault.” 

“I know, but still...” Sterling brought her hand to her mouth letting another large yawn slip through. “And I really wasn’t a lot of help which was entirely my bad.” 

April finally opened her term paper. “At least we got everything done.” She clicked on grammar check and allowed the document to do its thing. “I’m actually looking forward to the party now that we can sit back and enjoy it.” 

“Me too.” Sterling cuddled impossibly closer to her pillow. “You know what else I’m looking forward to?” 

“What’s that?” 

“Saturday.” 

April glanced at her, a teasing glint in her blue eyes. “You’re looking forward to studying?” 

Sterling narrowed her eyes, playfully. “No.” A dopey smile crossed her lips. “I’m looking forward to hanging out with your mom.” 

April narrowed her eyes in a mock glare and her stomach fluttered when Sterling released a groggy laugh in response. “Funny.” 

“I thought so.” 

“I am looking forward to having you all day though,” April admitted, sparing a quick glance toward her phone. “You just have to promise that we’re going to study.” She narrowed her eyes skeptically. “Midterms are next week so no messing around.” 

“Can’t make any promises,” Sterling muttered as she fought to keep her eyes open. She raised her head from her pillow giving her head a quick shake to jolt herself awake. “But I’ll try.” 

April sighed, resting her arms on her desk as she focused her full attention on Sterling. “I know I’ve told you this before but you’re not alone in all of this.” 

“I know, babe.” 

“It’s going to be a struggle for me to have you here all day and _not_ ravage you in one way or another.” 

Sterling propped herself up, seemingly more awake. “You have more than one way you want to do that?” 

“We’re not getting into this.” 

“You brought it up.” 

April half rolled her eyes as she pulled her focus away from Sterling and back onto her screen. “True.” A mischievous half smirk pulled on her lips as she ran her finger over her mouse pad. “And I would be lying if I said I hadn’t taken _full_ advantage of the vast and very varied information available online.” 

Sterling whined, pushing her face into her pillow. “See. You keep doing this,” she mumbled, her words muddled by the soft cushion. 

“What was that?” April laughed, keeping her eyes on her computer as she retyped a line on her paper. 

Sterling groaned as she raised her head. “You keep doing this,” she repeated, pouting pitifully. “The _teasing_ thing is cruel, babe. I don’t think you realize how good you are at it.” 

April bit down on her bottom lip, holding back the proud smile wanting to pull across her face. 

“Like, with the mistletoe. That wasn’t a very fair kiss, and you know it.” 

April creased her brow innocently and looked at Sterling. “It was. It was just a kiss.” 

Sterling blew out a breath, raising her brow in disbelief. “Yeah, okay. Whatever.” Her pout shifted into a smile when April chuckled lightly. She settled back down onto her pillow tucking her arms underneath the cushion once again. 

“I don’t mean to tease you.” April shrugged her shoulder. “It is kind of fun though.” She chuckled lightly, glancing at Sterling. Her mouth twitched downward as she noticed her girlfriend’s eyes slowly closing. “You look so tired, honey.” 

“I’m okay,” Sterling mumbled, snuggling against her pillow. “Keep talking. Your voice is amazing.” 

April blushed, a quiet laugh escaping her. “You look really comfortable though. I wish I could be there with you.” She struggled to keep her eyes off Sterling, knowing she needed to keep working on her paper before her own eyes started to close. She shifted, adjusting her position and continued working. “You know, sometimes I dream about waking up next to you.” 

“Yeah?” Sterling responded, groggily. 

“Mmhmm.” April inched closer to her laptop, clicking her mouse pad again. “I want that sense of intimacy with you, Sterl. I want to cuddle with you all night, stroking your hair and your skin.” 

April was amazed at how she could remain focused on correcting her paper even when thoughts of holding Sterling all night were suddenly invading her brain. She could almost feel the warmth of having the other girl’s arms and body wrapped around her own. 

“I want to wake up next to you and kiss you until your beautiful blue eyes open and look back at me,” April confessed, as she pressed her teeth into the corner of her lip, smiling through the control. “I love you so much, Sterl. I can’t wait until we—“ 

Her words died on her lips the moment she returned her attention to her phone and noticed her girlfriend fast asleep, a happy smile playing on her lips. She sighed, knowing she should probably be insulted that Sterling passed out in the middle of her monologue, but how could she be when Sterling looked so damn cute. She pushed her laptop aside, crossing her arms on top of her desk. She leaned down, resting her chin on her arms as she admired Sterling’s sleeping form. 

Her head titled to the side slightly as she watched Sterling shifted in her sleep, unconsciously raising her hand to brush across her face. April released a short quiet laugh, and she was certain the smile on her own face was absolutely ridiculous. She reached out and took her phone carefully off the stand, looking at her girlfriend's face on the screen. She rested the phone in her palm of her hand and gave the screen a quick poke right where the tip of Sterling's nose was. 

It was all in her imagination of course, but she could swear she saw her nose wrinkle. 

April reached along the edges, cradling her phone, smiling at the way it looked like she held a sleeping Sterling. Then her fingers found the opposed pair of buttons they were looking for and pressed them softly, like if the tips of her fingers were caressing the sides of Sterling's face, until the screen flashed, and she had a screenshot safely saved on her phone. She had to remember to show the other girl in the morning. 

After all, she had to make sure her new wallpaper was girlfriend approved.


	11. "Binge Eating"

April stood in the center of Fellowship anxiously playing with the cross around her neck.

She glanced back at the clock. Only a few more minutes and she would open the large doors inviting their entire Fellowship inside for their annual Christmas party. She glanced around the room making sure there was nothing out of place. There was nothing she missed. After all of the planning, decorating, and, well, torture she’d put her friends through... everything leading to the doors opened needed to be perfect.

Her body moved on autopilot to the back table holding the food for the event. An immaculately decorated table with an enormous spread of every type of food imaginable. At least the imagination of a high school senior. She gave the display a once-over, quickly leaning down to adjust some plates and napkins spread across the table.

Her attention was hyper focused on her own movements. Rearranging place settings and certain plates of food. Whoever thought putting chips miles from the dip needed to be smacked in the head. She muttered directions to herself as she picked up more items shifting their placement around the table. She was about to pick up a giant tray of cut sandwiches when two hands rested on her shoulders, gently pulling her away from the table.

“April, babe,” Sterling cooed, turning her body so she was looking directly at her. 

April stared blankly at Sterling offering no verbal response. It was almost as if she didn’t recognize her.

Sterling picked up on that immediately, concern lacing her features. “Wow, okay. Hi,” she cooed, cupping April’s cheeks in her hands. “Babe, everything looks great. You need to relax.”

April snapped from her daze, finally focusing on Sterling. “I am relaxed.”

Sterling raised an eyebrow. “You know, that _might_ work on someone who doesn’t know you as well as I do.” 

Their stares remained locked for what seemed like an eternity. The minutes ticking past until one of them broke and admitted the other was right. It wasn’t hard for April to give into Sterling. Her big blue eyes staring back and her with a mixture of concern and awareness had a way of breaking down April’s resolve.

April sighed as she slowly raised her hand, wrapping her fingers around Sterling’s wrist. “I just want everything to be flawless.” She knew her request was a tall order, but she needed some sense of hope.

Sterling stepped further into April’s space. “Flawless might not be one hundred percent achievable, babe.” A warm smile spread across her lips. “But you definitely came pretty darn close.”

April released a breath she had no idea she was holding. She could accept that especially coming from Sterling. 

“Thank you,” April whispered, caressing the inside of Sterling’s wrist with her thumb. “I don’t know what I would do without you sometimes.”

“The body count around here would definitely be higher,” Sterling joked, grinning goofily. 

April laughed wholeheartedly. Sterling always knew how to make her laugh. Without a thought, she pushed herself up on her tiptoes, pressing a lingering, kiss against Sterling’s soft lips. “You make everything better. I hope you know that.”

“You make it easy, babe. It feels like there’s nothing we can’t handle as long as you got me... like I got you.”

“Promise me you’ll tell me if I get out of line tonight.”

“Promise,” Sterling said, crossing her heart. “And I would die for you, you know that. But I kinda enjoy being around you, so if you want to ‘cut a fool’, I won’t stand between you and Franklin.”

April snorted. “He knows better than to misbehave.”

“He might be under the influence--”

April pulled back, a concerned look on her face. “You think somebody’s going to spike the punch?”

“No, no,” Sterling laughed. “I meant Lorna. Apparently one of her mistletoes managed to hit its target.” She scrunched her nose at her horribly mixed metaphors. “She got him, is what I meant to say, and he might not be operating at full capacity—”

“Which was not impressive to begin with.”

Sterling rested her hands on April’s hips. “If he does something, and you get angry, I’ll be there. For you. Always.”

April counted her blessing and none of them held a candle to Sterling Wesley. She took one of her girlfriend’s hands and brought it up to her face, giving it a quick kiss before doing the same with the other. “I love you, but seriously, this party is not the place to get handsy.”

Sterling’s shocked gasp as she played along and the easy laughter that followed was a balm, soothing April’s nerves like nothing else could. She still flinched when the end of day bell rang, signaling the imminent arrival of their fellow students, taking on the role as party guests for a couple of hours. 

April released Sterling’s hands and tried to shake off the last vestige of anxiety she held. She pulled herself up, knowing that as chair of the Willingham Christmas—correction, the Willingham Fellowship Christmas Party Planning Committee—she had done everything in her power to make sure everything would go off without a hitch.

When the first group to walk through the doors to the Fellowship room was the group of outcast misfits dismissively referred to simply as The Bad Kids, April’s heart sank, and she found a new appreciation for the old adage about no plan surviving for long. 

However, she refused to refer to them as the enemy, because despite their appearance and rebellious rejection of Willingham standards, she had Forensics with one of them and knew through Sterling that they worked with community outreach and brought forth more good than any douche—Sterling's choice of word—hiding out inside an exclusionary country club.

She greeted them warmly, with a big smile. “Welcome! I did not expect to see you here, but I’m happy you’ve chosen to join us for this celebration.”

“Thanks, April,” Draven responded, flashing that strange form of a smile he only shows when Coach makes random comments during meetings. He glanced around the room before meeting her eyes again. “It’s real… festive in here.”

April breathed in, putting on her best smile as she fidgeted with her cross. “That’s… what we were going for.” She turned to Sterling, furrowing her brow with a silent question.

Sterling raised her shoulders and shook her head.

More students began to file in, and the couple greeted them accordingly. April breathed a sigh of relief as more and more Fellowship students entered the room, marveling at the décor and the spread of food covering every inch of the table. She turned away from the door briefly, directing the students pondering over where to begin.

“Hey, Sterling. Looking good.”

April stiffened at the familiar voice greeting her girlfriend so casually. She steeled herself, turning back around slowly catching the arrogant grin of Chase Colton glaring back at her. He barely acknowledged April’s presence as he eyed Sterling his lascivious look slithering lazily across her body before tossing her a wink. He shot a quick glance in April’s direction making an unimpressed noise before laughing with his equally douchebaggy friends and walking further into the room. 

April took a step forward, ready to rip him in half with one of the million scathing comments burning the tip of her tongue.

Sterling reached out and grabbed her wrist, stopping her. “No,” she ordered, giving her wrist a gentle, calming caress.

April flexed her jaw, releasing a heavy breath through her nose. “I hate that your sister tried to set you up with him.”

“That was a long time ago.”

“Not long enough.” April narrowed her eyes. “His hair is so stupid…”

Sterling snorted a laugh. “That’s the one thing Blair likes about him.”

“Yeah, well, maybe she should date him,” April noted, shooting him another scathing look when he chanced another look back at Sterling.

“Who should date who?”

Blair appeared from nowhere, a plate of food already in her hands. Hannah B. and Ezequiel flanked either side of her, which was strange, but something April told herself she would need to get used to seeing. Their friendships, their families, were one now. And even though Blair could be a lot sometimes, it made April feel like she could be this happy and full forever.

“You and Chase Colton.” 

Blair made a disgusted face. “Ew, no.”

Sterling looked completely taken back. “Ew? I thought you liked his hair?”

“Yeah, but other than that… the kid sucks.” Blair took a bite from her food and spoke around a full mouth. “When he found out about you and April he showed his true self.”

April wrinkled her nose. “Any chance we can get you to swallow before you finish this story?”

“No,” Blair responded, defiantly taking another bite. “Anyway, he made a bunch of rude comments and then I… kind of… checked him with my lacrosse stick.”

“Girl, yes!” Ezequiel exclaimed, raising his hand for a high five.

Blair turned, giving his hand a quick slap. She returned her attention back to the couple. “So, yeah, fuck that guy.”

“Language, Blair,” Sterling scolded, looking around quickly. “Not only are we in school but we’re in the Fellowship room.”

“Meh,” Blair quipped, shrugging as she took another bite. “It’s a party. Give me this one.”

April rested her hand on Sterling’s shoulder. “Let her have this one, honey.”

Sterling’s jaw dropped, shocked. “You’re serious?”

“I _really_ dislike Chase Colton,” April noted, moving her hand to emphasize her point. She reached over and picked up the festively frosted Christmas cupcake from Blair’s plate. “This, however, I will not let you have. We do not want a repeat of yesterday’s nonsense.”

Blair shrugged. “Wasn’t that bad.”

“You had a sword fight with candy canes. It was bad. You could’ve gotten hurt.” April looked over at Sterling and gave her shoulder a soft squeeze. “You got lucky.”

“Meh. I’m sure Sterl wouldn’t mind having you kiss it all better,” Blair said with a knowing smirk.

“No Blair, _you_ got lucky, because you’re not the only one protective of Sterling, not anymore.”

“Fine,” Blair conceded. “Yesterday was stupid. I still plead the sugar. But I’m not Chase, you don’t have to fight me for Sterling. Not that he would stand a chance, anyway...”

April nodded. “Thank you. I really don’t want to fight you either.”`

“Of course you don’t, not when I’m going to be your sister-in-law one of these days.”

April felt a blush creep up on her face. “More like demon-in-law, at least when you’re high on sugar.”

Sterling couldn’t believe what she was hearing. She was so proud of Blair for being supportive, but _sister-in-law_ , that meant... That meant a future, that meant commitment. And April hadn’t hesitated for a second. She couldn’t hide her astonishment even if she tried, but she was too busy thinking of that day when all this would be their reality, no longer hopes and wishes, to even try.

Being so attuned to Sterling meant that April would’ve noticed no matter what, but she wasn’t sure how to read the look on her girlfriend’s face. She looked... happy, eager even, but her mouth was wide-open like she was surprised, or shocked. “I’m sorry, that was too much, I didn’t mean it,” she swallowed, trying to think of something to take the spotlight that was shining out of Sterling’s eyes off her, “like that. Blair’s been calling me that for a while to tease me. I’m used to it by now. Just another bit of Blair banter.”

The happiness drained from Sterling’s face. It felt like someone doused her with cold water washing away all the hope she’d felt seconds ago. April was staring back at her, her brow creased, the fear of crossing some imaginary line etched into her features. Sterling tried awfully hard to maintain a neutral expressing until her mouth twitched with words she couldn’t very well say burning the tip of her tongue. Her next breath hitched, and her shoulders rose alongside it; it wasn’t until her brain shocked her back to reality that she remembered to breath.

“Um, yeah, no, it’s fine.” Sterling creased her brow and blew out a dismissive sound, waving her hand. “I get it… what you two… do…” She paused, looking around at the group. “Is anyone else thirsty? I’m kind of thirsty. I’ll be right back.” 

April opened her mouth, confusion and panic choking her words, making it so she barely managed to get her girlfriend’s name out before Sterling was on the other side of the table, grabbing a drink from the punch bowl. 

“Sterl, what’s wrong?” April walked up to her slowly, watching as the cup never left her girlfriend’s lips, huge gulps of punch being consumed repeatedly. “Say something.”

Sterling took another swig and kept the cup aloft long after it was empty. She went for a refill, but April grabbed her arm and she shivered, turning to look into those blue eyes. “’snothing.”

April smiled and ran her thumb up and down Sterling’s arm. “What was it you said to me earlier? ‘that _might_ work on someone who doesn’t know you as well as I do’? Well, ditto. So, talk to me, please.” 

Sterling held April’s gaze and opened her mouth, trying to get the words running through her mind out. She wanted her to know that she was happy April saw Blair as a sister-in-law. She was excited at the prospect of a beautiful future together. She wanted her to tell her how badly her heart deflated when April said she didn’t mean it. 

Her words escaped like a choked sound and she was swiftly interrupted by Luke barreling toward them. He looked like a disheveled mess. A sweaty, disheveled mess. If Sterling didn’t know any better, she would have thought he had come in from running a marathon. She brushed her fingers against April’s arm flashing her an apologetic look and April exhaled, nodding her head understanding her girlfriend’s need to check on her friend.

“Luke, what the hell is wrong with you now?” Blair asked, stumbling when he tripped into her side.

The taller boy swallowed thickly, glancing around the party. “Lorna, she tried again—“

Ezequiel wrinkled his face in disgust. “Didn’t she trap Franklin already?” He turned to Hannah B.. “I swear all that girl cares about is a pulse.”

“And a pee pee,” Hannah B added, jumping at the loud gasp Blair emitted from beside her.

Blair placed her hand on her chest, feigning shock. “Hannah B., language.” She looked at Sterling, pointing at Hannah B. “Sterl, did you hear that?”

Hannah B. placed her hand over her mouth. “I’m sorry. It just slipped out.”

“It’s okay, Hannah B.,” Sterling responded, softly offering her a small sympathetic smile. 

“So, she gets a pass on pee pee, but I can’t say—“

“Blair!” Sterling scolded, shaking her head. She half rolled her eyes, exasperated then turned her attention to Luke. “She’s not going to mess with you here. You’re safe.”

Luke swallowed again, looking anxiously around the room. “Are you sure? She’s cagey. I don’t think she’s going to let anything stop her.”

April stepped in beside Sterling. “Luke, I promise, Lorna will not sexually harass you.” She crossed her heart. “You have my word.”

Luke nodded, vigorously. “Okay, okay. I believe you.”

April shifted, looking at Hannah B. and Ezequiel. “Why don’t you two start the playlist?” She turned to Blair. “Would you mind taking Luke to do… something?” 

Blair furrowed her brow, looking from April to Sterling then back to April. “Um, yeah.” She reached out, lightly slapping Luke’s chest with the back of her hand. “Come on, bud. Let me show you where April hid the candy canes.” 

She and Luke were gone before April even had a chance to protest. She’d have to deal with that later. Right now, her only concern was Sterling and how she’d acted. Was acting. Once Blair and Luke disappeared, Sterling had started looking around nervously, like she wasn’t sure what she was doing standing next to April. It was infuriating. If Luke hadn’t crashed into their conversation, April felt certain Sterling would have opened up. Now they were back on square one.

“C’mon,” she said, gently guiding Sterling toward a less crowded part of the room. “Let’s find some place to sit down.”

She took Sterling’s hand, finger interlaced, and led her to a chair partially obscured by the tree. When she sat down, she kneeled beside the girl she loved and allowed herself to slow down and not immediately demand that Sterling revealed what was wrong.

April watched patiently as Sterling sat there, clutching her hands with between her legs, picking at her nails nervously. She leaned in and gave Sterling a soft peck, repositioning herself to a more comfortable positing, sitting at Sterling’s feet. 

After a few minutes ticked by, April thought she heard her girlfriend sniff, so she turned around and saw tears glistening in Sterling’s eyes. “Sterling, no. Honey, what’s wrong?” She gently brushed one of them away.

“It’s silly. Nothing. It’s just... me, and getting all up in my head about something.”

“What though? What did I say? Was it—” April stopped herself, not wanting to find out her fears were accurate “—was it the whole sister-in-law things with Blair? I know it might’ve sounded like I was taking things for granted, taking things too far, too fast.”

“That’s not it. Actually, Well, it was, kinda...” Sterling allowed herself a sad smile when she thought of that moment. “But not the banter. That was good. Seeing you and Blair getting along. Good. All of it good.”

April smiled. “You looked shocked.”

Sterling looked up and returned April’s smile, sadness all but gone. “I was, but was that really all you saw?”

“Shocked, but... happy.” April took a deep breath. She’d misread that so badly. Handled it so poorly. “So, when Blair called herself my sister-in-law...”

“And you just rolled with it without protesting... I felt like I was looking at my future. You wouldn’t believe how happy that made me feel—”

April looked down at the floor, mumbling to herself. “I might have an idea.”

“—It’s not like we haven’t talked about it before today, we totally have. Of course we have, we’ve worked out plans for college together and even beyond. Nothing has made me doubt that we have a future together. But in that exchange, it was like I saw it manifest before me. You, me, happily married, growing old together.”

When Sterling paused, April looked up again only to see tears rolling down her cheek again.

“And then you said, y-you—” Sterling’s breath hitched and she swallowed hard, trying to regain her composure “—you said you didn’t mean it. ‘Like that’, whatever that’s supposed to mean.”

“Oh, honey, no, don’t think that.” April cradled Sterling’s wet cheeks in her hands, using her thumbs to wipe away the tears. “Never think that.”

“For a second I wondered if you didn’t want the same thing. And despite what I just said about there being no doubt in my mind about us, that single second was so agonizing and horrible—”

“That you felt like you were being ripped apart.”

“That I was having you ripped from me. You’re my other half.”

April pulled Sterling closer and kissed her softly before pressing their foreheads together. “I love you so much, Sterling Wesley. I want that future too. My only fear is that if I want it too much, it may never come to pass because I will scare you off. So, I try to live in the here and now, with you, standing beside you, always with you, focusing on us, right now.”

“One day though.”

“Absolutely. One day. There’s no doubt in my mind. Hang on, let me show you something.” April pulled out her phone and navigated to the picture she took last night.

“I took this last night when you fell asleep during our FaceTime call. You looked so adorable and peaceful. I meant to ask you earlier today if you would be okay with me using it as my phone wallpaper. Because when I see this picture of you, I see how I want my days to begin and end. I want to wake up next to you and I want to fall asleep next to you. That’s what I want my future to be.”

The loving smile pulled across Sterling’s lips immediately and remained all the way through their shared kiss…

* * *

The party was in full swing and everyone seemed to be having a good time. Ellen danced around the room to their odd mix of Christmas music, complimenting every choice and claiming a few of them were her holiday jam. Students were broken off into groups, sharing food, and laughing. The party was a hit and April could finally relax with the knowledge that she had pulled off exactly what she was hoping for.

She and Sterling may have gotten off to a rocky start, but as they everything in their relationship, they worked through it together. Clearing any lines that may have been blurred by a few misplaced words. They stood side by side, Sterling’s arm hung loosely around April’s waist. It was nice to be able to be like this with Sterling. 

Standing together like the strong, happy couple they were. 

She sipped from her drink, listening as Blair animatedly told a story about an incident at the yogurt shop. Apparently the chocolate pump exploded, and she and Sterling were stuck cleaning chocolate off the walls and themselves for over an hour. The image of licking Sterling’s chocolate covered neck flashed through her mind. April quickly averted her attention from her girlfriend suddenly finding the floor interesting. 

She did not expect her brain to take that turn so quickly. The tips of her ears heated, and she caught Sterling looking at her from the corner of her eye. A small smirk played on her lips and she squeezed her closer. April wasn’t sure how she felt about Sterling being able to read her emotions with just one look. 

Actually, yes she was. She loved it.

“Um, does anyone else see Mr. Thing over there?” Ezequiel asked, rolling his index finger toward a crowd gathered in the center of the room.

The group turned and the sound of April’s gasp cutting through the small space like a knife. It seemed Jennings thought the best idea would be to pull down a piece of red garland and wrap it around his neck. He pranced around the room swinging a green stand of garland in the air then provocatively moved the decoration between his legs. 

“Okay,” April grumbled, turning to hand Sterling her cup. “I need to put a stop to this.”

Sterling scrambled, placing her drinks down on a nearby table. “Babe, babe, babe,” she chanted, reaching out to grab April’s hips and pull her back. She pressed her body against April’s, wrapping her arm around her waist. “Breathe. I need you to breathe before you go over there.”

April heard everything Sterling was saying to her. But breathing was difficult when Sterling was pressed so tightly against her back. Every combination of Sterling’s scent mixing together and clouding her senses. She closed her eyes, steading herself as she slowly breathed in and out. She rested her hand on top of Sterling’s.

“Are you breathing?”

“You know very well that you’re not making it easy.”

Sterling chuckled, pressing a small kiss to her temple. “Don’t kill him.”

April leaned sideways allowing herself a better view of Sterling’s gorgeous face. “No promises.” She patted Sterling’s hand and was instantly released. 

Jennings hooting grew louder the closer April got to him. She could hear the sounds of idiot Chase Colton cheering him on and encouraging him to grab more décor from the walls. April pushed her way through the crowd of students stumbling into the center of Jennings little dance circle. She hurried toward him, snatching the garland from his hand.

The cheer stopped, replaced by murmurs and the music seemed to grow louder.

“Dude, you’re messing up my groove,” Jennings exclaimed, extending his arms outward. 

April clenched her teeth. “Don’t call me dude,” she growled, waving the garland. “And this is not a toy to use in your own personal… whatever that little display was.’ 

“Geez, calm down, April. It’s a party.”

“A _respectable_ party, Jennings. This is not a strip club.”

“Oh, but bro, imagine if it was—“

April spun around toward the owner of the comment. “No one asked for your input, Darren.”

The boy held his hands up defensively and turned away, joining a group toward the back.

April briefly watched him go then returned her glare to Jennings. “Do not touch any more decorations.” She yanked another string of garland from around his neck. “Do not dance like a jackass in the middle of the room.” She took a step forward noticing the red tint covering the whites of his eyes. “And eat something so you sober up. This is a school function, Jennings. For Christ sake.” 

She stomped away from him and over to the decorative fireplace. She put the garland back in its correct place, stepping back to ensure nothing else was damaged. Satisfied that Jennings hadn’t caused anymore damaged, she started to make her way back to Sterling. All she wanted to do from this point out was spend time with the love of her life and her friends, enjoying their final weekend before midterm madness.

She didn’t get extremely far though as the sight of Lorna practically pinning Franklin against the Christmas tree caught her eye. She growled, tossing her head back as she shifted directions and headed straight toward the couple. The discussion she was about to have with them felt almost hypocritical considering she would do the same with Sterling if she could. 

But there was a time and place for everything. And this was neither of those. Having to deal with Jennings should’ve been enough policing for one party. At least these two had enough sense to not put their activities center stage. Didn’t make them any more appropriate, of course.

“Franklin,” April said sweetly, walking up to the pre-occupied couple. “Lorna. Was the janitor’s closet not available? Did you forget to book ahead?”

“Actually, yes. We found Luke hiding in there.” Lorna smirked. “He did give a little jump when he saw me. Can’t imagine why.”

“I’m sure I can. I’m sure there’s also a section or ten in the school regulations concerning student conduct and behavior that could also be used to describe what you’ve been up to over the last few days.”

Lorna took a step forward and challenged April. “Oh yeah, are you going to quote them to me?”

“Now, why ever would I do that?” April batted her lashes, smiling sweetly at the feisty red head.

Franklin butted in. “Because you said—”

“I wouldn’t waste my time trying to make _you_ to appreciate the privilege you enjoy by being Willingham students. But you might miss it when I bring you in front of the board and have you kicked out.” April smiled, less sweetly. “I _would_ make sure to take my time addressing them, outlining every infraction, citing every applicable rule.”

“You wouldn’t!”

April practically snarled. “Try me. It’s been a while since I’ve had the pleasure of properly eviscerating somebody. I suggest you do not tempt me. I’ve been told I bite.”

She managed to contain her laughter until after Franklin and Lorna ran off in completely different directions, staying very, very far apart. If she checked the janitor’s closet later, she was sure she’d find that they’d somehow managed to get back together, but April didn’t begrudge them that. Just keep it out of the public eye, having a sense of decorum and a properly calibrated sense of shame never hurt.

That was something nobody would ever accuse Chase Colton of having. When she turned around to finally return to her girlfriend’s side after all this nonsense, she saw him standing there, legs wide, all swagger. After how he acted towards Sterling when he arrived, April could only imagine what he was saying now that he had her corned and alone. This, this... now this would simply not do. April started down towards him, seeing a huge target drawn across his back; uncertain of what she would do, but ready to rumble. 

Before April got close enough to enact whatever plan she had formulated in the seconds it took from noticing him harassing Sterling to walking up on him, she saw his shoulders slump and he walked off, saying something that sounded an awful lot like I’m sorry. She tilted her head and looked at Sterling.

“What? I can cut a fool too,” Sterling said, smiling proudly.

“You,” April said, closing the distance and wrapping her arms around Sterling’s waist to pull her close. “You are so incredibly sexy, dealing with that cretin like that. I’m sorry I wasted all that time on lecturing Franklin and Lorna about school-appropriate behavior.”

“They wouldn’t listen?”

“Nope. I had to threaten to have them kicked out of school. Especially Lorna, after her whole mistletoe debacle.”

“People ought to know by now that when April Stevens talks, you should listen.”

April laughed and put her hand against Sterling’s cheek. “I dare say the same should be said about you, you sexy, fool-cutting, debate champ.”

“I haven’t actually won anything.”

“You’re the champ to me. I just wish there was time for me to reward you properly for your outstanding performance.” April looked straight into Sterling’s eyes, a crooked half-smile that promised so much on her lips.

“Leave room for Jesus, you two!” Ezequiel called out as he walked up with Hannah B. in tow. “Or I would have to report you for inappropriate behavior on school grounds.”

Hannah B. waved. “This is a great party. You did a great job planning everything, April. And the playlist worked great too, don’t you agree?”

“Oh! Is this Dominic the Donkey!” Sterling exclaimed as the familiar tune filled the Fellowship room. She smiled bright, tightening her hold on April. “I love this song!”

Hannah B. squealed, excitedly as she clapped her hands. “Me too!” she stated, waving her hand at Sterling. “What about the hippopotamus song? Do you like that one too?”

Sterling took in a sharp gasp. Her blue eyes lit up. “Yes! That song is great too!”

An amused expression played heavy on April’s face as she admired her girlfriend and her best friend. The songs were both ridiculous. They made absolutely not sense. But they made Sterling and Hannah B. happy and that was all that mattered. April squeezed against Sterling’s side, resting her hand against her stomach as she glanced over at Ezequiel.

He lifted his brow giving April a knowing look. “Atrocious taste in music,” he mouthed, laughing at the evil glare April shot his way.

“Man, this food is great,” Blair complimented, rejoining the group.

Sterling marveled at the amount of food Blair managed to carry on her plate. Then again, her twin also had zero shame and seemed to be carrying more under her arm. Blair shuffled beside her sister as she shoved a large amount of something into her mouth.

“You think you have enough there?” Sterling quipped, chuckling lightly.

Blair shot her a look, swallowing. "Binge eating at Christmas is totally justified..."

“It’s not Christmas though,” Ezequiel noted, reaching out and stealing a piece of food from her plate. He avoided her awkward slap and popped the food into his mouth.

“Christmas party so… close enough.” Blair took another bite as she motioned toward the food. “I think something went bad though. I almost cracked my tooth on that stuff in the center of the table.”

April went through her mental filing cabinet trying to figure out what on Earth Blair could possibly be talking about. There was no way anything on that table had gone bad. “What are you talking about? We had everything set out fifteen minutes before the party started.”

Blair made a dismissive noise. “Then someone sold you some bad stuff because that shiny food in the middle-“ She stuck out her tongue and made a disgusted noise. “It’s hard and it’s tasteless-“

“Blair, that food is decorative!” April interjected, shocked. She couldn’t understand why Blair would think shiny, shellacked food was edible. “That food was not meant to be eaten. It’s like a prop.”

“Ohhh…” Blair breathed, nodding her head. “That explains so much.”


	12. "Fuzzy socks..."

Sterling arrived at April’s house around mid-afternoon, prepared to study. She scooted her backpack strap further up her shoulder as she reached out and pressed the doorbell, signaling her arrival. She breathed in, calming the odd surge of nerves pricking through her skin. Spending all day with April was something she’d been looking forward to all week. Now that the day was here, she wasn’t exactly sure how she was going to focus on the task at hand and not succumb to her desire to touch April in every way humanly possible. 

She noticed a shadow cross the side window and she steadied herself, a wide smile forming on her face as she prepared to be greeted by her beautiful girlfriend. Imagine her surprise when Mrs. Stevens opened the door, greeting her with a warm smile and open arms. 

“Sterling, come in, sweetheart,” she welcomed, stepping to the side giving her more room to enter. 

“Good afternoon, Mrs. Stevens,” she returned, taking a step inside. 

Mrs. Stevens wrinkled her nose at the formality and closed the door. “Oh, sweetie, please, call me Beth,” she corrected, placing her hand on Sterling’s back as she walked her further into the house. “Might as well drop the formalities now.” 

Sterling wrinkled her brow, slightly confused by the sentiment behind her words. “O-okay,” she paused, letting the permission to call an adult by their first name settle in her brain. They stopped by the edge of the stairs and she turned, anxiously twisting the strap of her bag. “Should I wait for April down here?” 

“No, no, go on up.” Mrs. Stevens waved her hand casually toward the stairs. “April’s waiting for you.” She gently touched Sterling’s shoulder and started to walk away. “I’ve got some things I need to take care of in the kitchen. I’ll be up later to check on you.” She smiled fondly at the girl then ushered her closer to the stairs. “Study hard now.” 

“O-okay.” Sterling did a half turn watching as Mrs. Stevens disappeared into the family room. 

Her attention shifted toward the stairs then back in the direction April’s mom had gone. It never ceased to amaze her, even after all these months of being together, that Mrs. Stevens had zero concerns with them spending time alone in April’s bedroom. Debbie “Save Room for Jesus” Wesley would never allow them this freedom. Beth was definitely a change of pace in their parental department and Sterling still wasn’t sure if it was welcomed or even more nerve-racking then being set boundaries. 

She shook off the feeling and bounded up the stairs and made her way to her girlfriend’s bedroom. The door was closed when she arrived, so she reached out, gently knocking to announce her arrival. When there was no answer, she knocked a little harder. Sterling had never been one to be intrusive, so she waited, rocking anxiously back and forth on her heels. 

“Coming!” 

The sound of April’s voice brought a flutter to her stomach. She ran her hand through and down her hair several times and waited eagerly for April to open the door. Sterling was fairly certain it was going to take everything in her power not to wrap April up in her arms and walk her backwards toward the bed, kissing her feverishly the entire time. They were supposed to study today and only study. 

Sterling did say she would try to stay focused. 

April opened the door, wearing a casual crop top Adidas hoodie and matching sweatpants. Seeing April so relaxed and so casual always had an effect on her she could not explain and caught her completely off guard. She tried to keep her composure, she really did, but when she noticed the small strip of April’s smooth skin peeking out from the space between her top and sweatpants, her brain short circuited and all sense of reason flew out the window. 

April smiled, barely getting out a “Hello” before Sterling lunged forward, wrapping her arm around her waist, and kissing her like she hadn’t seen her in years. 

April released a surprised, muffled squeak at the contact before smiling through their greeting. Her arms raised, wrapping around Sterling’s neck as her right hand rested gently on top of her girlfriend’s head, slipping down to tangle her hair between her fingers. Sterling walked them back, kicking the door closed behind her and April giggled through their kiss. 

“Okay, okay,” April chuckled, reluctantly breaking their kiss. She leaned back in Sterling’s embrace, smiling endearingly up at her. “Hi.” 

“Hi,” Sterling returned, softly as she leaned in for another kiss. She whined when April’s hand rested against her mouth. 

“We have to study,” April reminded, amusement lacing her tone. “You promised.” 

“I said I’d try. That’s different.” 

“Sterling,” April warned, raising an eyebrow. 

Sterling pouted, releasing her grip. “Alright, fine.” Her pout shifted when April leaned up, pressing another soft, albeit quick, kiss to her lips. “Seeing you in sweatpants just does something to me.” She stepped closer to the bed, placing her backpack down on the floor. “You really look so good in casual wear.” 

April chuckled, shaking her head as she returned to her bed, finishing up their study prep. “Thank you.” She glanced at Sterling, shifting her gaze up and down. “You don’t look so bad yourself, you know? I really like that hoodie.” She walked over to her desk and unplugged her laptop, bringing it over to her bed. “I hope you have a shirt on underneath that because you _might_ not be leaving with it.” 

The mere thought of April wearing her clothes made Sterling feel like she was floating. She looked down, catching the image on her black hoodie. An adorable half cat half unicorn rested on her chest the words “Meowgical” written in cartoonish font underneath the artwork. She remembered Blair thinking the hoodie was ridiculous, but Sterling bought it anyway. 

Sterling tugged the material. “This is my favorite hoodie.” 

“Even more reason for it to become mine,” April teased as she eased her way onto the mattress, crossing her legs underneath her. She looked up at Sterling, patting the space beside her. “Come on. We have a lot to go over.” 

Sterling sighed dramatically, as she joined her girlfriend on her bed. Another thing that would never not surprise her. Even if she were allowed to have April in her room at home, which would definitely never happen, one of them would surely have to do their studying at the desk. She laid back, settling against April’s headboard. She leaned to the side, bringing her backpack onto the bed and began to unload her books. 

April glanced back at her, perfect smile still in place. “Music?” 

Sterling looked up from her task. “Can we listen to _our_ playlist? I can’t do anymore Christmas music.” 

April chuckled, quietly as she picked up her phone and scrolled for their list. “I couldn’t agree with you more.” She tapped the screen on her phone and soon the sound of soft music filtered through Baby Yoda. 

“I’m so glad you like that speaker.” 

“It’s my absolute favorite thing anyone has ever gotten me.” Sterling beamed proudly, feeling a flutter of excitement through her body when April lightly squeezed her calf. 

“My mom fears him though. She thinks he’s going to come to life and destroy the house.” 

Sterling released a deep laugh and shook her head. “Remind me to apologize during dinner.” 

“Will do.” 

* * *

They’d been studying for almost two hours and Sterling was becoming restless. She’d almost forgotten how focused April was when it came to schoolwork. Especially whenever there was an important exam coming up. Sterling glanced over her book, studying the way her girlfriend looked from her view. Her sat haphazardly on top of her head, exposing every expanse of her neck. Sterling caught glimpses of her profile each time April shifted to highlight a page or scribble notes into her book. 

Being this close and seeing every inch of her favorite spot to kiss, other than April’s lips, was becoming an uncomfortable torture. Sterling set her book down off to the side and pushed her palms into the mattress. She scooted herself closer to April, positioning herself so her legs were on either side of her girlfriend boxing her in. April glanced over her shoulder, barely taking her focus from the pages of her book. 

“Shouldn’t you be studying?” April asked, barely acknowledging the change in position. 

“I’m taking a break,” Sterling responded, softly as she moved closer and placed a small kiss on the back on April’s neck. A small shivered rocked her girlfriend’s body and Sterling smiled against her skin. She continued trailing soft, open mouth kisses along the back of her neck hoping to generate a more substantial response. “You should take a break too.” 

April sighed, closing her eyes as she unconsciously leaned into the contact. “We’ve only been working for an hour-“ 

“Almost two hours, actually.” Sterling opened her mouth slightly, allowing the tip of her tongue to graze the sensitive spot on April’s neck before placing a simple kiss in its place. 

April’s breath hitched at the contact and she tried to regain her composure. “Sterl, midterms are important…” she argued, knowing how lame and weak her defense sounded in her own ears. 

Sterling wrapped her arms around April, pulling her back as she continued to kiss every inch of her neck. “Ten minutes.” 

April sighed, still fighting her own urges. Her own need to submit to Sterling and do exactly what her body was telling her to do. “Sterl…” 

“Please?” 

That was all it took for April to drop her pen and turn into Sterling’s embrace. Their lips met in a soft, lingering kiss before melding together into something deeper. More passionate than either of them intended. April cupped her face, tilting her head to gain deeper access to Sterling’s kiss. Her stomach fluttered when Sterling moaned into her mouth, her fingers kneading into her sides and skin. 

“Girls?” 

Her mother’s knock broke them apart as if they had been doused with cold water. Sterling scrambled back toward the headboard, fumbling to grab her book. April snorted a laugh, assisting Sterling by turning her book right side up before returning to her original position. 

“Come in,” April called out, adjusting her hoodie then picking up her pen once again. 

The door opened, and her mother entered, carrying a tray filled with drinks and various snacks. Sterling looked up from her book offering a small wave as a greeting. She prayed that her cheeks weren’t as red as they felt. It was amazing what just a few minutes of contact with April could do to her. Her head still felt like it was spinning, and she shifted from side to side trying attempting to ease the discomfort settling low in her stomach. 

April looked up as well, an innocent smile gracing her lips as she placed her work aside. “Oh, mom, you didn’t have to do this,” she said, reaching out to take the tray from her mother. 

“Well, you two are working so hard and you haven’t come down for any type of break so I thought you could use some snacks,” she explained, helping April steady the tray. 

“Thank you so much, Mrs.-Beth,” Sterling said, catching April’s questioning glance from the corner of her eye. She would come back to that explanation later. “We really appreciate this.” She reached over, taking a drink from the offered tray. 

“It’s my pleasure.” Mrs. Stevens looked around the room, standing somewhat awkwardly beside the bed. 

Both girls exchanged a glance then returned their attention to the older woman. 

April raised her brow expectantly. “Was there anything else, mom?” 

“Oh, yes!” Mrs. Stevens moved from side to side ensuring she kept both girls in the conversation. “Dinner will be ready in about an hour so if you two wouldn’t mind taking a break in about thirty minutes to help me set up?” 

April nodded. “Sure, not a problem.” 

“We’d love to,” Sterling added, flashing a bright smile of her own. 

Mrs. Stevens offered them a warm smile. “Thank you, girls. I really appreciate it.” She let out a deep breath and clasped her hands together. “Well, I’ll let you get back to it.” 

The couple gave her a short wave which Mrs. Stevens returned as she made her way back toward the door. She pulled the door open, stepping through muttering a soft see you soon as she slowly closed the door. It wasn’t long before the door popped back open and Mrs. Stevens stuck her head in through the crack. 

“I’m just going to… you know... leave this open.” 

April brought her bottom lip between her teeth and nodded. “Okay, mom.” 

“Okay,” Mrs. Stevens breathed as she lightly patted the doorframe then disappeared. 

Sterling chuckled. “And here I thought she trusted us.” 

“Yeah, well,” April began as she picked up her notebook again. “Maybe she heard you begging for ten minutes of-“ She made air quotes. “Break time.” 

Sterling narrowed her eyes, playfully glaring at her girlfriend. “I wasn’t alone in that, you know.” 

April huffed a laugh as she lovingly swatted Sterling’s foot and they returned to their studies… 

* * *

As promised, the couple soon set their studies aside and made their way downstairs to help with dinner. There were a few stumbles along the way thanks to Sterling feeling the need to touch April as she led them down the stairs. She claimed April looking unbelievable hot in her casual wear as the reasoning. To which April reminded her that the purpose of the string on her sweatpants was not to pull her into random corners near the staircase. 

They helped April’s mother set the table. Sterling placed the silverware while April assisted in bringing over the food and drinks. Once everything was placed, they settled into their respective seats, Sterling sitting to April’s right and Mrs. Stevens taking the seat across from them. 

“Sterling, April tells me you’ve both applied to Emory,” Mrs. Stevens said, picking at her food, more interested in talking to Sterling. 

“Yes, everyone was expecting me to go to UGA, but April and I discussed going to Emory, which is a much better option for both of us and hopefully we’ll find out any day if I got accepted. There’s no way they’d not accept April, but little ol’ me? I’m not the top-ranking student and sure-to-be-valedictorian at Willingham.” 

Beth just shook her head and laughed. “No need for that, Sterling. You weren’t never anything but an excellent student, and I’m sure now that you’re studying together with April, she’s not letting you slack off. You two do make a great team.” 

“You’re much too kind, Beth. I’m simply happy I can learn from April. The way she is organized and methodical in all the ways I’m not is inspiring. I hope she is rubbing off on me.” 

Sterling pulled her leg back before April’s kick could connect. Honestly, she hadn’t meant it like that. Looking over to her girlfriend, she saw her mouth _behave!_ but before she could apologize, April spoke up. 

“Sterling is very diligent in her attempts to,” April slowed down, wanting to make sure she was not as careless with her words as Sterling was, “inspire me to do better. Not just when it comes to excelling academically, but also in maintaining healthy relationships with those who have stood by me over the years.” 

“I know, darling. She’s been so good for you. Every day I can see the way love lights the way for you two.” 

April blushed, still not used to her mom being so openly supportive. It would probably take more than six months to get clear of sixteen years of conditioning, but every day she took a step forward, and with Sterling by her side, it was much easier than she had expected. 

“Thank you, Beth,” Sterling said, “truly, thank you from the bottom of my heart. We’ve been blessed with the support of everybody, and especially yours. It means the world to us.” 

Sterling looked over at April and reached out to take her hand. “Not having to hide how we feel has--” Sterling borrowed a phrase from Beth. “Being able to live in the light rather than have to hide in the shadows has made everything seem so easy, so right. Being able to stand next to April and show everybody the love we share...” she drifted off, unsure if she really could do justice to the way she felt using only words. 

Mrs. Stevens nodded and allowed the silence to linger for a second, taking pride in the way these two girls had navigated not only being young and in-love, but being two girls in love living in a conservative Christian community. 

“I could not be imagine being happier to see you two together. And I know for a fact that April has never been happier either. Your love is something special. The way you love her, Sterling, it’s enough to make the most hardened cynic believe in a ‘happily ever after’.” 

Sterling smiled so widely, felt so happy that she thought she would burst. Beth had just described exactly what she was hoping for. What they were hoping for. Knowing that April’s mom would be there on their journey, standing alongside them, always supportive was the best Christmas present Sterling could hope for. 

“I _do_ think I owe you an apology though, Beth.” 

“Whatever would you have to apologize for, Sterling?” 

“I should’ve been more considerate and not brought the stuff of nightmares into your home.” When Sterling was met with a confused look, she chuckled and expounded: “The Baby Yoda speaker I bought for April.” 

“Oh.” Beth nodded knowingly. “Don’t be silly. I think April might’ve exaggerated just a tad. Or, well, maybe I should say I’ve been the one to exaggerate my reactions. It was fun to tease her over that. I don’t really fear that little green thing. Though I do contend that it is in no way cute.” 

“Well, mom, maybe if you’d watched The Mandalorian with me, like I suggested, you’d think differently.” 

“I couldn’t, sweetie. Star Wars was, well, it was something you and your father shared.” 

“But mom...” April was taken aback. She’d never considered that her mother held a similar association to the one she once did. The reason she’d wanted to share it with someone else was to scrub her love of those movies clean of him. “That’s why I wanted you to watch. So maybe it could become something of ours instead.” 

“That’s very sweet of you, but for now I think I prefer our things to be... untainted.” 

April nodded, understanding her mother’s reluctance. “I won’t give up hope. Someday, I will get you to sit down and watch something with me. I managed to convert Sterling.” 

“You didn’t play fair,” Sterling laughed. 

“Hush. You love Baby Yoda too. Don’t you claim otherwise.” 

“I would never. I’m just saying it’s hard to resist your enthusiasm. The way you squealed when Rosario--” 

“Ahsoka.” 

“When _Ahsoka_ appeared on screen for the first time. It was so adorable. I just wanted to bop you on your cute little Star Wars nerd nose.” 

Mrs. Stevens watched as her daughter and her girlfriend launched into a playful argument over all things Star Wars and how they’d share this moment and that moment. Her heart swelled every time she finally got to see April happy and carefree. She was still a kid, would always remain one in her eyes, but now she finally got to experience unconditional love, the way she always should have. 

“Mom, let us help you with the dishes,” April offered as she and Sterling began gathering the plates from the table. 

Her mother waved her hand. “No, no, you girls need to finish studying.” She reached out to take the plates from her daughter. “I can take care of things down here.” 

“Absolutely not,” April stated firmly, moving the plates out of her mother’s reach. “We can spare a few minutes to help you.” 

Sterling gathered the glasses and a few discarded napkins. “Yeah, it’s the least we can do after you took the time to cook such an amazing meal.” 

Beth rested her hand over head heart, gushing. “Sterling, you are an angel.” 

Sterling blushed at the compliment. “I’m just trying to be helpful. That’s all,” she responded, standing beside April.. 

April smiled, nudging Sterling gently. “You really are an angel though.” 

“As are you,” Sterling noted, mirroring her girlfriend’s smile. She did a quick glance toward Beth noticing the woman gathering up what was left over from dinner. Sterling took the opportunity to give her April an appreciative kiss. “Love you,” she whispered, placing a kiss against her temple. 

April beamed adoringly up at her. “Love you more.”

* * *

They retired upstairs, returning to April’s room for whatever studying they could fit in before Sterling had to go home so she could get up bright and early tomorrow morning and join her family for church.

Their books were waiting for them on the bed, but Sterling wrapped herself around April as soon as the door closed. She held her girlfriend close, kissing the top of her head. “Your mom, she’s… I love your mom,” Sterling whispered and let her hand play with the hair at the base of April’s neck

“Turns out having one supportive parent, if her name is Beth Stevens, may outweigh having a dick of a father.”

“Language!” Sterling laughed and gave April a squeeze. “But I totally agree. It’s so cool to see your mom be proud of you. And not for getting straight As. Proud of you. Proud of us.”

April shivered. She felt content. Happy. She felt Sterling’s body pressed against hers, warm and inviting. It would be so easy to give in. “Sterl, we need to study. At least a bit more.”

“Okay, a bit. How would you define a bit? Ten minutes? Five?”

April smiled and gave Sterling a kiss before climbing on the bed, settling in against the headboard and picked up the textbook. “You’re ridiculous. Come on, I saved you a spot.”

Sterling pouted and placed her hands on the bed, leaning in, putting her face close to April’s. “Only if you promise—”

“To do what?” April looked up and rested the book in her lap before reaching up to grip Sterling’s chin. “What do you need me to do?”

“You know.” Sterling shuddered when April moved her thumb up to caress her lip. She couldn’t resist, so she parted her lips and pressed the tip of her tongue against April’s thumb.

“Studying first.” April said and pulled back from Sterling who huffed at being denied her girlfriend’s touch.

“Fine. You’re right. I know it. Midterms. Studying. Fun must wait.”

April chuckled. “I knew I could convince you.”

“You really don’t play fair. Withholding affection is not legal under current debate rules. Nor is what you did to ‘convince’ me to watch Mando with you.”

April tried to keep a straight face, but her ears gave the game away.

“But I’ll behave,” Sterling said, climbing across April’s legs to take up a seat on the far side of the bed. She smiled to herself when she heard April’s breathing hitch when she, quite accidentally, brushed her leg against her tiny, very must in control of herself, girlfriend. “At least for 5-10 minutes. Or however long a bit is.”

April wasn’t timing Sterling on this, but she could swear not even five minutes had passed before she felt Sterling curl closer, her legs entangling themselves with April’s. Another minute and Sterling started slowly rubbing her foot against April’s calf.

“Sterl, please, we still have so much work to do.”

“I know, but that’s work, hard work. This is fun.”

“Getting a B+ won’t be fun.”

“Won’t happen and you know it.”

April sighed. She could feel herself slipping again. “Just for a little bit.”

“There’s that word again. It’s so nebulous.”

April looked over at the clock. Half an hour. Can you give me 30 minutes of uninterrupted study time?”

Sterling shook her head and draped herself across April’s body, her lips searching out that special spot on her girlfriend’s neck she knew would be a convincing argument for abandoning the books for tonight.

“Nope, nope, nope. We need to study,” April stated firmly, sitting up straighter before using her book as a shield against any further attacks.

Sterling whined and the pout reappeared. “I swear, ‘when’ can’t come soon enough.”

“Sterl, honey… okay.” April put the book away and placed her hands on Sterling’s shoulder, holding her steady. “Let’s talk about this.”

“No, less talking, more doing. Preferably me.”

April burst out laughing. “God help me, but I love you so much. Only you could make whining and pouting seem like foreplay.”

Sterling joined in, laughter flowing out of her. She waited until the both of them calmed down and reached up to touch April’s hands. “I can see the wheels turning in that big, beautiful brain of yours, you know, deciding what you want to say to me, sorting it all out."

“Yeah, I was—”

“Preparing your points? Outlining arguments? Compiling a dossier?”

April laughed again, “I’ve had a mental dossier on you for a long time.”

“I don’t know if I should be flattered or outraged.”

“Definitely the former. For a while there it consisted of nothing but images of your smiles.”

“Categorized and indexed?”

“You know me too well.”

“And now?”

April blushed. “It, uh…”

“You’ve been thinking about it.”

“Of course I have. It’s been my favorite box to crack open lately.”

“Mine too,” Sterling widened her eyes in an extremely exaggerated expression. “Imagine that.”

“Honey, please. You haven’t had to crack anything open. If anything, it’s cracked you, because it’s been spilling all over. Nobody’s had to imagine anything because it’s been very obvious.”

“It?”

“You know, your…”

“Horniness?” Sterling suggested.

“If you have to be crude about it.”

“Babe, if I wanted to be crude, you would know,” Sterling grinned.

April looked at her, making obvious that she wanted to know. “Before that can happen, we need to talk.”

“It feels like all we’re doing lately is having these serious conversations.”

“That’s not true.”

“I know, but yesterday I was crying at a Christmas party.”

“That was… not my finest moment. I think I panicked.”

“You panicked?” Sterling had to laugh at the absurdity of it all. April Stevens, master of boxes and fully in control of herself at all times panicked. “And still, it was you who had to talk me down.”

“That’s not true. I was speaking to us both.”

“Really?” 

“Sterling, I told you this yesterday. And today we have other things on the docket.”

Sterling snorted. “And you call me ridiculous. Docket.”

"The lake house.” April blurted out, surprising herself how desperately she wanted to get this conversation over with so they could figure out the when, finally. “I was thinking we could sneak away at some point during our night at the lake house"

“Won’t all our friends be there?”

“Yes, and Blair.”

“Babe, I thought the two of you were good?”

“I’m joking. I’m… nervous about this. I want it to be perfect. I want to make sure I can make it everything you want it to be.”

“All I want is to be with you. You know, with you.”

“Me too. I can’t wait,” April said, surprised just how honest that felt. It was as if the box was finally fully open and she could admit to herself that what was waiting for them meant a lot, maybe even more than she’d let on. “And yes, the lake house might not be ideal, but it’s soon. I’m sorry I can’t make it perfect.”

“April, it’s okay if it's not perfect,” Sterling raised her hands when she saw April tense. “Hear me out. It will be perfect because it's the two of us. It will be perfect, because regardless of what happens, it will be us taking the next step on our journey together.”

Sterling held April’s hand in hers and brought them down so she could put them over her heart. “But it doesn’t have to be perfect for it to mean all those things. “It might be awkward and we might end up having to figure things out. Or maybe not,” Sterling gazed down, thinking back, “judging by what happened in the storage room. And of course, then there’s all the research you’ve been doing.”

“Reading a few articles and watching a couple of videos does not translate into practical skill. Regardless of topic.”

“I think you’re an expert concerning this topic?”

April snorted. “Sex? I don’t think so.”

“Me. You’re an expert when it comes to me. I can’t think of anyone who knows me better.”

April looked away shyly. “What about Blair?”

“Nuh uh, not even Blair. For one, I don’t want to sleep with Blair.” Sterling sat up straighter when she realized what she just said. “Because that’d be icky and weird and all kinds of wrong. But posit a world—”

“Posit?”

“Shut up. You’re rubbing off on me.”

“Considering how you’ve been acting this week, I would much sooner expect you to be doing the rubbing. On me.”

“Funny. I meant your vocabulary.”

“Turns you on, does it?” April smirked.

“There’s very little about you I don’t find extremely sexy.”

“I need an itemized list so I can fix those things. I want everything to be sexy to you.”

Sterling blinked. “Those socks? They’re not very sexy. I’m sure they’re comfortable—”

“And warm. I have cold feet.”

“I’ve noticed.”

“You have? And you didn’t say anything?”

“It felt,” Sterling chuckled, “too domestic. We’re still in the honeymoon phase. I promise I’ll bring up your cold feet once we’re living together and growing old.”

“Maybe you could get me socks for Christmas? Something sexy.”

Sterling wrinkled her nose. “Socks are never sexy. I can do cute, if you want to.”

“That’s a deal. Socks for Christmas.” April laughed. “And you had the audacity to think we’re not ready for domesticity.”

“Seriously, you really want a pair of fuzzy socks?”

“They’re going to be fuzzy?” April looked at her girlfriend and smiled. “You’re right, that’s really cute, almost as cute as you.”


	13. "Antlers"

Sunday service ended on a very family holiday oriented note. At least, April thought that was what Pastor Booth was preaching about. She tried extremely hard to pay attention during the sermon but Sterling sitting one pew away was very distracting. She tried not to glance over her shoulder and share a longing look with her girlfriend. She tried not to notice how good she looked in her aqua blue flowered dress, cut low, but still acceptable for a morning church service.

And she tried not to blush when Sterling winked and blew her a kiss in front of everyone in their congregation. 

“Pastor Booth is so inspiring, don’t you think, sweetheart?”

April pulled herself away from her thoughts of Sterling and turned to her mother. “Oh, yes, always,” she agreed, hoping that was an acceptable response to whatever her mother had said. “Very inspiring.” 

Her mother offered her a warm smile and April looped her arm through her mother’s as they made their way out of the Church. They stopped at the bottom of the steps as Beth searched her purse for her keys. April glanced around the groups of standing around the lawn chatting about Lord knows what. She found Sterling immediately, even if she wasn’t intentionally looking for her.

Sterling was standing beside Blair, smiling and nodding along to whatever her mother was speaking about. April shifted her gaze to Debbie noticing the woman excitedly waving her hands and clasping them together as she leaned back animatedly. It was so odd seeing Debbie this animated outside of her own home and April was certain she was staring at the woman for entirely too long.

Her suspicions were confirmed when Debbie locked eyes with her, waving frantically. April knitted her brow unsure if the woman was waving at her or something behind her. She turned, checking to see which was the case. By the time she turned back around, Debbie had waved her hands conceding and was making a beeline toward April and her mother. 

“Beth, April!” she called out as she took a few hurried steps closer.

Mrs. Stevens looked up from her bag, a warm polite smile pulling instantly onto her face. “Debbie, hey!” she returned, stepping around April to meet her halfway. The women exchanged a cheek kiss followed by a small hug. “Wasn’t that service inspiring?”

Debbie placed her hand over her heart, leaning back like the holy spirit was currently inhabiting her body. “Oh, my Lord, so inspiring.”

April shifted her attention back to Sterling, silently questioning whether she knew why her mother had come bounding over. All she received in response to her gaze was another wink followed by the cutest smile April had ever seen. She knew every version of Sterling’s smile. She had each one committed to memory, filed in order of favorite to absolute favorite.

This one was new. This one made her body tingle and her heart flutter inside her chest. 

She reminded herself to file the image close to the top.

“So, we were planning on having a little family brunch followed by a family game day,” Debbie explained, pulling April’s attention back to her. “And we were wondering if you all would like to join us?” She wiggled her shoulders. “Good food, fun conversation, little family competitiveness.”

April tried to control her excitement over the invitation. She had promised her mother she would join her for brunch with her Aunt Kathleen but spending the day with Sterling sounded like a much better option. When Beth gave Debbie an apologetic look, April felt her hopefulness deflate and did her best to keep her disappointment from showing. 

“Oh, Debbie, I would love to, but I promised my sister I’d meet her for brunch,” Beth explained. She wrapped her arm around April’s shoulders cuddling her closer. “But I’m sure April would love to join you.” She leaned to the side looking April in the eyes. “Right, sweetheart?”

“Are you sure, mom? I promised you I’d go with you to see Aunt Kathleen.”

Beth made a dismissive noise. “Something tells me you would much rather spend the day with Sterling than listen to your Aunt and I drone on about how crazy your grandmother is.” She turned to Debbie. “But I will definitely be at your Christmas party on Saturday.”

Debbie reached out and lightly tapped her shoulder. “Wonderful.” She turned to April, a bright welcoming smile on her lips. “We’ll see you at the house in about an hour?”

“Uh, yes. I’ll be there.” April nodded, finally allowing her excitement to break free. 

“Alright! I’ll let the girls know—“ she reached out, giving April’s shoulder a small tap “—and we will see you soon.” She gave Beth another kiss on the cheek and bid her a goodbye before turning to rejoin her family.

Beth held up her keys, wiggling them toward April. “Found them, by the way.” She put her arm back around April’s shoulders leading them to the car. “Let’s get you home so you can change and get over to Sterling’s.”

“Are you sure about this, mom? If you want me to come with you, I’m sure Sterling would understand.”

“Sweetie, no,” Beth cooed, a sincere expression on her face. She wrinkled her nose. “I don’t really want to spend time with Kathleen, but I promised.” She nudged her lightly “I would much rather beat you at some board game or whatever fun times Debbie has planned for y’all.”

April gasped, feigning offense. “You’ve never beaten me at anything. Don’t think you’re going to start now that there is a distraction in my life.”

Beth laughed, giving her daughter a half hug before stepping around to the driver’s side of the car. “Well, I am up for the challenge next time,” she stated, giving her daughter a loving and playful smile before she unlocked the doors and they stepped inside the car to head home….

***********************************

April arrived thirty minutes ago and was immediately enlisted to help prepare brunch. It surprised her when Debbie sent Sterling on an errand with Anderson and chose to have Blair stay behind. In a way she understood. Blair had a way of distracting her father and they probably would have disappeared for longer than necessary and come back without the things Debbie asked them to pick up.

Regardless, April couldn’t help but be a little disappointed to not be working side by side with her Sterling and her mother. 

She laughed to herself remembering her girlfriend’s claim that gifting her a pair of socks was “too domestic.” Yet, here she was, setting up a family brunch alongside Blair and her mother. If this type of activity wasn’t the prime example of domesticity then April had no idea what was. She would have to remind herself to make sure Sterling had a clear understanding of the definition. 

“So, April, Sterling told me what a wonderful time she had with you and your mama last night,” Debbie said, reaching across to slap Blair’s hand. “Blair, stop eating everything. There are other people in this house.”

Blair rolled her eyes, popping the last bite into her mouth. 

“Yes, ma’am,” April answered, settling up a tray of pastries. “It was a lot of fun. My mother really enjoys Sterling’s company.” 

Blair released a small coo, reaching out to grab a pastry. April slapped her hand and she pulled giving April an offended look as she rubbed her stinging skin. “What the hell, Stevens? Whose side are you on?”

“Language, Blair and apparently she’s on the right side.” Debbie said, a small smile playing on her lips. She glanced over at April once again. “Sterling told me all about it. She was so excited that your mama let her call her by her first name. You would have thought she’d won some type of award.”

April smiled, releasing a quiet laugh as the image of her girlfriend’s excited little face popped into her mind. “It definitely caught me a little off guard, but Sterling was overjoyed.”

“Well, I’m so glad Beth is so supportive of y’all. It warms my heart that you and Sterling can be together and in love.” She wrinkled her nose, wagging her finger adoringly. “I’ve always liked you, April. Even when you were supposedly making Sterling’s life a living hell.” She thrusted her thumb at Blair. “According to this one anyway.”

Blair dropped her jaw, raising her hands. “Is it pick on Blair day or something?”

They shared a laugh as Blair grumbled and returned to her task.

April averted her eyes momentarily, feeling a slight blush on her cheeks. “I’ll admit we had our rough spot—“

“Rough years,” Blair muttered, but flashed a soft smile toward April. It was nice to see her show that she was kidding for once.

“But we’ve moved past all of that and now we’re here and… I don’t think I could be any happier,” April confessed, unable to stop the size of the smile spreading across her face. She looked up meeting Debbie’s eyes. “And thank you, Mrs. Wesley, for everything. You’ve made me feel very welcome in a time where I thought I wouldn’t have anyone other than Sterling…”

Debbie sighed and took a few steps closer to April. She wrapped her arm around the small girl’s shoulders and squeezed her close. “You call me Debbie, you hear?” She raised her free hand, touching April’s chin. “You’re like the third daughter I never had. And by that I mean a sane one.” 

“So, if she’s like your daughter and she can call you Debbie,” Blair questioned, cocking her head to the side. “Does that mean I can call you Debbie too?”

April and Debbie looked at Blair, their unamused expressions mirroring one another. 

Blair raised her brow, taking a step back as her finger swayed back and forth between them. “Woah, it is scary how you’re both looking at me the same way right now.” She moved away from the kitchen island and walked over to the refrigerator. “I might have to talk to Sterling about this.” She pulled the door open, peaking around the appliance looking utterly insulted. “And, by the way, mom, what do you mean she’s the sane daughter? Are you trying to say Sterling and I are crazy because I really think—“

Their meticulous preparation was suddenly interrupted when Sterling came running in from outside, hair wild and eyes sparkling with excitement. They all turned to look at her, wondering what she and Anderson had got up to on their errand. “Guys, you _have_ to come outside right now. You’ve gotta see this!”

Debbie sighed and her shoulders slumped, ever so slightly, like she was all too used to this. “What is it this time, Sterling? The last time you dragged me outside I ended up in the yard watching a ladybug crawl across your hand for half an hour. It was very sweet, but I had other things that needed tending to. Much like right now.”

“It won’t take long, I promise. But you _gotta_ see this. I don’t wanna spoil it. Just… c’mon.”

April placed a hand on Debbie’s shoulder, getting her attention.. “Let’s just do as she asks. When she gets _this_ excited it would take longer to talk her out of whatever ridiculous notion she’s come up with.”

“Hey! I--”

“Hey there, gurlfriend,” April said with a wink and laughed. “What is it you want to show us?”

Sterling narrowed her eyes. “I think you might be making fun of me. In front of my mom. You and my mom are bonding over thinking I’m ridiculous.”

“We are bonding over how much we both love you.”

“It’s true, baby, we do both love you,” Debbie nodded.

“How about that other thing? Huh? Where you call me ridiculous behind my back.”

“I call you ridiculous all the time. To your face.” When she saw Sterling begin to pout, she added: “It is said with affection.”

“Because you love me?”

“Yes.” April pinched the ridge of her nose. “What is with you right now? Did Blair sneak you another batch of candy canes? I swear, if I ever find out where she stashed those…”

“I had nothing to do with it!” Blair shouted, head still buried in the fridge, trying to decide between cheese and another type of cheese for her pre-brunch snack.

“Those belong to the academy,” April snapped at Blair. “And after what happened the last time you and Sterling—”

“Hold on now just a moment,” Debbie requested, looking back and forth between the twins. “What happened? And when?”

“It was nothing serious, Debbie… in the end,” April glared at her girlfriend and her sister. “I dealt with it.”

“Yeah, mom, nobody was hurt. Blair tried her best though.”

“Sterling, show me your tongue.” April ordered. “I bet it’s all red.”

“Nuh uh.” Sterling clamped her mouth shut and made a defiant face.

April smiled, affection for the petulant girl surging through her and before she knew what she was doing, she found herself standing next to Sterling, holding her chin tightly. “If you don’t open your mouth and show me that tongue immediately, I’ll make you.” She dropped her eyes to Sterling’s lips and felt the need to show Sterling who was in charge grow stronger with every second that passed. “I’m pretty sure I know how.”

Whatever it was April was planning to do was interrupted when Debbie cleared her throat. Loudly. Repeatedly. “Girls...”

April took a step back, but her hand lingered for just a moment and her eyes never left Sterling’s lips, at least not until she saw them move and heard Sterling speak: “Yes, ma’am, I apologize. That was inappropriate behavior for a family brunch.”

“I’m so sorry, Debbie, I don’t know what came over me,” April said, mortified, her actions inexplicable even to herself in light of what they were doing and where they were.

Debbie smiled, probably warmer than April would’ve expected after such a blatant display. “I remember what it was like to be young and in love.”

April nodded and turned away, hiding her blush.

“C’mon, already, dad is waiting,” Sterling whined.

Debbie and April relented and dragged Blair outside along with them.

*********************************** 

“Did you put _antlers_ on your car?” April asked, not really sure why anybody would do this willingly. The Volt was decorated with some hideously cheap-looking plush antlers 

“No, it was dad, but I _love_ it.” Sterling bounced around the car, preening proudly as she straightened the antlers that already had begun sagging.

“You would.” April sighed. The Twins’ driving skills were already lacking as it were, and now they’d no doubt be driving around busily imagining themselves controlling one of Santa’s reindeers. She could only imagine the carnage that would follow.

Blair looked over at her mom and April. “Okay, maybe April is the sane one.”

Debbie gave her husband a look filled with exasperation. "Anderson, when you mentioned antlers I assume it would be a cute dashboard ornament. Or something you'd hang off the rearview mirror."

“Actually, I was hoping to recreate the old Lyft mustache, but with antlers. This was all they had.” He was lost in thought for a moment. “I suppose I could’ve attached real antlers to the bumper, but that seems more like something Deacon would do.”

April gasped, horrified. “I don’t know how you do it, Debbie”

“Lots and lots of patience and love. And the occasional Cougar Town-sized glass of white wine.” Debbie caught herself and shook her head with a chuckle. “I really shouldn’t be saying such things in front of you.”

“I’m going to call him Rudolph from now on,” Sterling announced.

“Rudolph?” April asked.

“Him?!” Blair spluttered. “Absolutely not. You’re not getting away with saying that our car is a he. There’s no way our Volt is anything but a she. Think about it for a second.” She paused and watched expectantly as everybody watched her in confusion. “Seriously dudes.” Blair shook her head at the assembled stupidity. “When I’m inside the Volt, I feel warm and safe. Does that in any way describe a penis?”

Everybody stopped what they were doing and their looks turned from confusion to horror.

“What? Bucks have penises. I’m just being accurate.”

“Blair, please stop saying that word.”

“Fine. Bucks have sexual reproductive organs that are pencil shaped,” Blair snickered, obviously not thinking about deers anymore.

Sterling ignored the brewing furore, too focused on making Rudolph whole. “Do you have any superglue in the workshop, dad?”

“Yes, I’m pretty sure I do, along with wood glue, epoxy, and a few other kinds, but I’m not exactly sure why you need it.”

“He can’t very well be Rudolph without his red nose,” Sterling said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world, Blair glaring angrily at her.

“Rudolphina,” Blair said, stepping closer to her sister.

“Rudolph.” Sterling stood her ground.

“She,” Blair hissed.

“He.”

Debbie inserted herself in between her not-so-sane daughters and pushed them apart. “Baby, before we ruin a car we spent a lot of money on—”

“Most of that was for repairing damage done to the suspension, I don’t think a red nose is going to make a lot of difference when it comes to that,” Anderson added, unhelpfully.

“—why don’t we all go inside and eat?”

Sterling looked on as her mother ushered an irate Blair through the door. She walked over to April and looked at her earnestly. “You’re still going to ride in Rudolph with me, right?”

She found herself enveloped by her girlfriend’s strong arms, a teasing smirk on April’s lips, making Sterling pout when she realized what was coming, and then April said, “How about I drive us around until after Christmas?”

*********************************** 

After a perfectly pleasant brunch where nobody tried to kill anybody, Anderson began clearing the table, April helping him put away the dishes while Debbie kept a close eye on the twins. There would be no more fighting on her watch, and thankfully, she knew that Anderson had a plan to help with that.

“I thought we’d try something different today,” Anderson began, putting a gaudy box in the middle of the table. ”I’ve grown tired of game day somehow always ending up with the two of you—”he pointedly nodded at the twins “—at each other’s throats. And we won’t even talk about when a friendly game of 7 Wonders ended up with you wrestling when you disagreed about some resource rule.”

Sterling sat down next to April and glowered at her twin seated opposite her. “I still say that if I bought the resource Blair should not get to use it. If you have two apples and I give you two gold for them, you don’t still have two apples to eat,” Sterling grumbled. “Ask my grade school teacher.”

“Well, regardless, since things clearly get a bit too competitive at times, today we’re going to play a cooperative board game. It’s called _Escape!_ ”

“I thought you meant we were going to play _Pictionary_ ,” Debbie said, confused, “or maybe a friendly round of _Uno_.”

“Those are fine games, but I want us to work together,” Anderson said, “as a family”

“And April,” Blair snarked, sticking her tongue out, earning her a swift kick under the table from her sister.

“April _is_ family,” Anderson stated calmly, ignoring Blair. 

“Dad!” Sterling nearly knocked over the chair when she leapt up to give her father a big hug. 

“Mr. Wesley,” April took a deep breath, steadying herself.

“Please call me Anderson,” he said, laughing as Sterling was smothering him with hugs and kisses. “I know my wife talked to you earlier about you calling her Debbie from now on. I know, because we talked about it. We both agree that there’s absolutely no reason why a family member should have to stand on formality.”

“Aw, this sucks. April’s gonna be the favorite from now on,” Blair muttered, earning herself glares and disappointed head-shaking from her parents and, once Sterling returned to her seat, another swift kick.

April tried to contain her smile but when Sterling took her hand and gave it a soft squeeze before lacing their fingers together, it all became too much. “Anderson,” she looked over at Debbie, sitting at the other end of the table, “Debbie, if it wasn’t for you two, Sterling probably wouldn’t be in my life right now, at least not like this. The way you gave her love and support when she came out turned out to be the thing that reignited the hope for a ‘some day’,” April paused briefly to bring Sterling’s hand up for a soft kiss, “we both thought lost, the hope that when nourished eventually blossomed into love and brought us here. I’ve been blessed by my mother giving me the same, so thankfully we don’t have to speculate on what never came to pass, but knowing you and seeing your love for us all in action makes me proud to be considered part of the family.”

“Well, that’s settled then,” Anderson started saying, clearly taken by April’s heartfelt speech, before he was interrupted by Blair, making horrible, loud retching noises with her finger half-way down her throat.

“Blair! Stop that right this minute!” Debbie scolded, outraged any child of hers would act this way during such a genuine moment.

Instead of allowing Blair to ruin this, April just chuckled and said, “Don’t worry Debbie, give her some time to adjust to being the runt of the litter.”

“Stevens! You—” Blair bristled, arms shooting up angrily in front of her. “I’ve never lost to Sterl—” she settled back down “—I’ve never lost a fight against a sister before, and nothing’s going to change that, not even you being part of the family. Besides, you’re _tiny._ ”

“I lift,” April stated confidently. “You should join me in the gym some day and we’ll be able to determine who truly is the strongest.”

“Oh, so you’re saying we’re going to have a some day too?” Blair shot back.

April laughed, somehow enjoying this familiar bickering. “A day where I beat you fair and square.”

“Anyway, as I was saying before Blair derailed us,” Anderson interjected, hellbent on actually getting to play this game he bought. “ _Escape!_ is a cooperative game, which means either we all win or we all lose. And it’s a time-limited game. It came with this CD that works as both a timer and provides mood music. Isn’t that neato?”

“At least that means it won’t take five hours to complete,” Blair said and snorted. “Like Monopoly at your house back in the day, Stevens. Remember?”

“I do remember playing Monopoly. Vaguely,” April admitted, unsure of where Blair was going with this.

“You wanted us to play by the rules, all the rules, following them to a tee. Did you know that Monopoly was originally designed to demonstrate the _dangers_ of monopolies? It’s a horrible game by design.”

“I did in fact know that.”

“And still you willingly subjected us to that?”

“I thought it could be educational. Maybe you’d learn something for a change.”

“You’re the worst. Even back then you were the worst.”

“You must like me better now though, right? Isn’t that why you asked me to cuddle the other night?” April said with a grin.

Anderson and Debbie exchanged a questioning look, not sure what to make of the barbs being flung back and forth, but when Blair gasped before declaring April a ‘pain in the butt’ with a laugh, they decided it would probably be okay after all.

*********************************** 

Anderson might’ve picked a cooperative game, but he probably should’ve read up on the rules more closely. After a few incredibly hectic rounds, with dice tumbling off the table regularly, and surprisingly combative bouts of shouting, where April eventually decided that the family needed some firm hands at the wheel, they finally managed to escape the temple before the timer expired, much to everybody’s relief.

Everybody sat back down, their hearts pounding from the stress brought on by the mood music’s ever increasing intensity and the booming announcer’s reminders of another minute gone by.

"Okay, that's the last time your daddy is picking a game..." Debbie said, clearly winded, her features drained.

“I dunno, I thought that was fun,” Blair chimed in with. “Even when Shorty got all bossy.”

“Did we or did we not manage to escape once you were all listening to me and following orders?”

“Ya, gotta hand it to you, you did whip us into shape.”

“Thank you. A bit of acknowledgement is all I’m asking for. And with that, I will bid you farewell.”

“Really?” Sterling pouted. “We’ve barely had any time together.”

“Sterl, I’ve been here all day.”

“Yes, I know, but…”

“No ‘buts’,” April stood up and smiled at the people seated around the table. Sterling’s family. Her family too, now. “We must do this soon again. Maybe with a game that Blair can’t sabotage so easily.”

“Hey! Be nice. I did what you told me to. Eventually,” Blair smirked, letting April know that her demon-in-law would always put up a fight, but be there for her in the end.

Anderson and Debbie walked up to April and gave her a warm hug. 

“Welcome to the family, April. It can be a madhouse, but we wouldn’t have it any other way,” Debbie said, smiling at her new, sane daughter. She waved for Sterling to come over. “Baby, why don’t you walk your girlfriend to her car?”

Sterling just bit her lip and nodded, dragging April into the hallway and out the door towards her car. When they reached the vehicle, April found herself slammed against the side of the car and Sterling’s lips followed shortly thereafter. 

Getting wrapped up in kissing Sterling was always so easy. April was fairly certain she could do it for hours and, in all honesty, she had. But she really had to get home. Tomorrow was their first midterm exam. They both needed to study and be well rested. And, right now, making out against her car in the middle of the Wesley’s driveway was not contributing to the promise of a good night’s rest.

“Sterl,” April spoke softly through their kiss. She tried to break their embrace, but Sterling wasn’t allowing that to happen. She leaned into April, pinning her against her drivers side door. “Honey, I have to go.”

Sterling mumbled what sounded vaguely like the word no. She moved her lips away from April’s, kissing her cheek then her jaw, and then her neck. April rested her hand against the back of Sterling’s neck, closing her eyes as she enjoyed the warm press of Sterling’s soft kisses against her sensitive skin. When Sterling’s teeth grazed her pulse point, she took in a sharp gasp snapping herself from her girlfriend induced haze.

“We have exams tomorrow.”

“We’re smart. We’ll do great.”

“Sterling…” 

Her girlfriend’s name tumbled from her lips in the form of a moan and April knew she had to put an end to this. If she didn’t, there was no way she was going to sleep tonight. Not without thoughts of Sterling destroying her brain and making it impossible to focus on anything else. Which could lead to her failing her exam and, as much as she loved her girlfriend, that simply could not happen.

“As much as I would love to sit out here with you all night-“ April’s breath hitched when Sterling kissed an extremely sensitive spot below her ear. She managed to wiggle herself loose and leaned back, resting her hands on either side of Sterling’s overheated face. A serious expression covered her face as she locked eyes with Sterling. “We have to stop. I have to go home.”

The puppy dog expression that overtook Sterling’s face almost made her want to renege her statement. It took every ounce of will power she had left to not pull Sterling into the backseat of her car and let their goodnight kiss continue.

A slow smile pulled at the corner of April’s mouth and she gently brushed her thumb against Sterling’s warm cheek. “I had an amazing time today. Your family really, really put a lot of feelings into perspective and I am so thankful for everything we have.” She inched closer, pressing a small kiss against her lips. “I love your family so much.”

Sterling smirked. “Even Blair?”

April chucked, rolling her eyes. “Even Blair.” She exhaled, lightly allowing the smile to light up her features. “But you know what?”

“What?” Sterling questioned, shifting her hands to rest on the shorter girl’s hips.

“I love you most of all,” April stated, kissing the tip of Sterling’s nose. She forced herself out of Sterling’s grasp, laughing as she dodged her attempt to keep her in place and opened her car door. “I’ll call you when I get home.”

“Fine,” Sterling sighed, leaning forward against the open door. “I love you.”

“I know.” April winked, touching the tip of Sterling’s nose before climbing into her car and closing the door. 

Sterling stood dumbfounded, pondering her girlfriend’s response as she started her car and pulled out of the driveway. Her blue eyes widened slightly, and she waved her hand frantically attempting to get April’s attention. The car stopped suddenly, and April rolled down her window. April raised an eyebrow curiously as Sterling took a few hurried steps toward the open window.

“That was a Star Wars reference right? You telling me you know? You weren’t just brushing me off?”

April laughed, shaking her head. “Yes, honey, that was a Star Wars reference.” She pushed herself up and kissed Sterling again. She moved back slowly watching as Sterling’s blue eyes fluttered opened to meet her gaze again. “Just when I thought you couldn’t get any sexier.”

Sterling snorted a laugh and moved away from the window. “You should go before I pull you out of the car and you end up staying here all night,” she stated as April blew her a kiss then drove away…


	14. "I'll Murder You"

Sterling looked over at the closed door that led to the bathroom situated between her bedroom and that of her obnoxious, currently very nearly dead-to-her, sister. Normally it would be wide open and they’d annoy their parents by talking loudly—shouting, really—instead of doing the civilized thing and going into the other’s room if they wanted a conversation.

They were only on day one of Midterm Madness and Blair was already hitting new levels of exam-related stress, claiming one of her favorite pencils had been stolen and that when she followed the shavings, they led to a crack in the wall.

People would definitely do odd things when under stress, but Sterling would’ve never expected her sister to react like this. She’d watched her take down bruisers several times her own size, remaining cool as a cucumber throughout. Blair would sit patiently for hours on end, staking out a building while hoping for a single glance of the skip du jour. Alright, maybe Bowser would dispute that part, probably citing the incident at the hair salon and the many times Blair would leave him alone in the car to get some snacks and soda, despite his repeated threats of making her use the empty soda cup once she inevitably needed to use the little bounty hunter’s room.

He never did though, because Bowser was a sweetheart underneath that scraggly gray beard and outdated wardrobe. Blair on the other hand was being the Blariest Blair that ever Blaired. 

Sterling sighed and flipped through her flashcards absentmindedly, finding it hard to focus when hard rock versions of Christmas standards were currently assaulting all of her senses. She recognized this one, a boring version of _Jingle Bells_ that Blair had tried to sneak onto the Fellowship Christmas party playlist, arguing there was no way they could say no since it was a pastor playing. Turned out they could, mainly because it was dull in the way only Christian rock that focused more on being Christian than being rock could be.

When Blair seemed to turn the volume up to eleven, Sterling felt certain this torture would never end. She got out of her desk chair, covering her ears and fell into bed with a frustrated scream that nobody would hear over this infernal racket. She debated grabbing a pillow to use as oversized ear muffs, but decided that uncovering her ears for even the few seconds that would take would be too much for her.

She closed her eyes and thanked her lucky stars that April had been her study partner ever since she became her partner partner; additional revision and preparation wouldn’t hurt, but she’d never been as well-prepared before as she was now, and she was already a straight A student back then. That didn’t matter to April, who took to the task of outlining their study plan with the efficiency of an army drill sergeant, setting milestones and establishing goals that would intimidate even most battle-hardened veteran of the gruelling college application process.

April was also the one who, after impressing upon Sterling the value of creating her own flashcards—”studies have shown that information absorption and retention increases significantly when you take notes by hand, and I don’t see why the same shouldn’t apply for making flashcards,” she had said—instead of using some online service and then surprised Sterling a couple of days later with a stack of lose index cards that she surely hadn’t found in the office supply section of a Target.

The way her girlfriend would be considerate down to the last, tiny detail made Sterling love her even more. Who, other than April, would present her with cards fit for the fanciest wedding invitation when she knew most of them would go to waste on exam prep flashcards? Who else would take such care and consideration to make sure everything was perfect? April, only April. Sterling could think of April for the rest of the evening and she still wouldn’t come close to reliving the infinite number of moments that had brought them here and made their love what it was today. 

Sterling wouldn’t be thinking of much of anything unless Blair got her shit together, especially not when the song selection included… a ska song about the grinch? Jumping off the bed, she bolted through their shared bathroom until she stood in front of the door to Blair’s room.

Wishing that kicking Blair’s door in was an option, Sterling made sure to at least make it slam loudly into the wall as she walked into her sister’s room.

“Don’t you dare touch that knob.” Blair said, never looking up from her book, clearly aware anyway of exactly Sterling was going to do. “Sterling...”

She didn’t touch the volume, but she wasn’t going to leave before her sister came to her senses. “Blair, please.”

“Sterl, I love you but if you turn down the Christmas music, I’ll murder you.”

“Blair, for the love of god, This isn’t music. It’s just _noise._ I can barely hear myself think, much less hear what you’re saying to me.”

Her sister turned around, pointed at the volume knob and made a wagging motion with her finger indicating it was off limits, then tracked her finger over until it was pointing clearly at Sterling. She held it there for what seemed like a long time and then snarled as she moved her finger slowly across her own throat, meaning obvious.

Walking back through their shared bathroom, Sterling made sure to jam a towel underneath Blair’s door, hoping against hope that anything could stop the noise from reaching her ears. She did the same on her side and flopped onto the bed, studying the furthest thing from her mind. If only April was here. She would know what to do, and more importantly, she wasn’t afraid of standing up to Blair. Her phone sat on the desk and it didn’t take much deliberation before she reached out, picked it up and sent a message to her girlfriend.

 **Sterl** 🤸  
thinking of you babe 😘

 **April** 💞  
You should be thinking about studying.

 **Sterl** 🤸  
blairs making that impossible rn  
shes being an 🍑  
can we ft? i need to see your face 

**April** 💞  
It’ll have to be brief. Still a lot of work.  
We still have our FaceTime tonight☺️

When April accepted the call and her face appeared on the screen, Sterling felt all her anxiety fall away. The way her entire being shifted when April was around was miraculous.

“Have I told you just how much I love you?”

“Once or twice,” April flashed the half-smirk she knew Sterling loved, not even thinking of the ramifications. “I love you too, honey. What’s the matter?”

Sterling stared quietly at the screen, knowing it would probably only be a minute or two before April wanted to get back to her own studying, leaving no time for silliness. “I think you can hear what’s the matter. Something’s off wi—” a notification popped onto her screen, obscuring April’s cute face; Blair had sent a message: “previously: ‘sympathy 4 the grinch’ by 100 gecs. Next? You’ll hear it in a second or two. I want it to be a surprise.” Sterling wanted to scream.

“Now she’s even interfering with our FaceTime calls! I’m going to do something drastic.”

“Please don’t,” April’s calming voice said. “Blair rarely acts out without reason.”

Sterling pouted and looked deeply into April’s blue eyes, finding them as calm as her voice was a second a go. “I know, but I wish she’d just talk to us, any of us, instead of blasting th-that crap.” A record scratch echoed throughout the house and hollow snares beat out the opening to _Jingle Bells_ , followed shortly by another taunting message from Blair.

“You should know this one sis, it’s a classic.”

Before Sterling could decide which way would be the least conspicuous to kill her sister, now very-much-dead-to-her, Debbie called out from downstairs.

“Girls, get down here, you father needs us all to help unload the car. Seems he got a bit overeager when purchasing new decorations for the house.” 

Sterling sighed. Sororicide would have to wait, her parents needed her. She held her phone up to her face and smiled apologetically. “I have to go. Talk to you tonight? Love you so much. You’re the only thing keeping me sane right now.”

“It’s a madhouse alright,” April replied before blowing Sterling a kiss.

“And Blair, make sure you turn that racket off before you join us. That is not the kind of Christmas music we play in this house!” Debbie shouted, sounding just about as happy with Blair’s picks as Sterling was.

* * *

It'd been fifteen minutes since what surely would've been a screaming match had their mom not interrupted ended. Sterling tried to concentrate on the flashcards spread across her bed, but her focus was completely shot. How was she expected to keep her mind on studying when her sister was sitting across the hall, probably sulking on her bed, completely irritated with her? Granted, Sterling was irritated too but maybe not as much. 

Someone had to call a truce.

Sterling sighed, pushing her flashcards aside. She scooted toward the edge of her bed, shutting her laptop along the way. There was a brief moment of hesitation knowing Blair could be stubborn, so she had to approach her sister as casually as possible. Maybe she could at least pull a smile from her before they started the apology process. 

She stood from her bed, tucking her laptop under her arm. She took in another deep, reassuring breath and shuffled her way through their adjoining bathroom. Just as she had suspected, Blair was sitting on her bed, legs crossed underneath her. Her brown eyes were fixated on the screen and she refused to look up. 

Even when Sterling purposely bumped into the wall. 

“That came out of nowhere,” Sterling joked, earning nothing but silence in response. She pulled her bottom lip between her teeth, taking another cautious step closer. “Listen, I know we are both super stressed out…” She leaned in, pumping her arm back and forth jokingly. “And it’s only Monday.” 

A nervous smile crossed her lips as a strange noise escaped her. It sounded like a laugh strangled around an apology. She inwardly cursed herself and took in a calming breath. “Blair, I’m sorry I insulted your music. It’s just this is the last week of school and exams are always a pain. And it’s even worse because sometimes I zone out and I start thinking about other things and your music was _such_ a distraction and I have so many of those already—" She squinted as she clutched her laptop to her chest. “Did you know I had to change the wallpaper on my laptop? It was originally a picture of me and April, like, kissing but I couldn’t stop staring at it, so I had to take it down—" 

Blair slowly lifted her attention away from her laptop and turned to Sterling. A small crease formed between her brow as she tried to understand where exactly her sister was going with this conversation. 

“And speaking of April, I’ve decided what I want to get her. I’m definitely going with the ring. I just don’t know—" 

“Woah, woah, woah, hold on,” Blair ordered, waving her hands in the air bringing Sterling to a halt. “You’re buying her a ring? Like, an engagement ring?” 

Sterling’s eyes widened and she shook her head vehemently. “No! A promise ring!” 

“Oh, Jesus…” Blair placed her hand on her heart. “I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’m pretty sure you two are going to ride this out with the whole white wedding thing but—" She closed her eyes briefly as she shook her head and exhaled heavily. “Anyway.” She waved her hand dismissively then met her sister’s eyes again. “I guess… I was playing my music a little obnoxiously loud. I should have been more considerate.” 

Sterling smiled sympathetically and stepped closer, pressing her knees against the corner of her sister’s mattress. “Are you okay?” she asked, sincerely. “We can take a little study break and talk about whatever you want.” She waved her hand, emphasizing her point. “You have my full attention.” 

Blair seemed to consider her offer for a brief second before gesturing facetiously. “So, tell me about the ring? Have you decided on a style yet?” she asked, clearly wanting the subject changed. A disheartened expression crossed her face suddenly. “Please tell me it’s not that gaudy thing I saw you looking at when we were at the mall..." 

“That ring wasn’t gaudy!” Sterling defended, finally taking a seat on her bed. 

“Sterl, the band was some weird shade of blue.” 

“I think it was cobalt.” 

Blair snorted. “It was _ugh_ -balt.” 

Sterling released a quiet laugh. She shifted so she was facing Blair. “I bookmarked some ideas,” she said, placing her laptop down on the mattress. “Wanna see?” 

Blair nodded, closing her own laptop and placing in on the floor. She left enough space allowing Sterling to sit beside her. They mirrored one another's positions, crossing their legs underneath their bodies. Sterling opened her device illuminating the screen. 

“Wow, you’ve _really_ been researching this,” Blair commented, leaning closer to the screen. “You have like sixteen tabs open.” 

Sterling made a face, glancing at her fleetingly. “Five. I have five tabs open,” she corrected, returning her attention to the screen. “They’re open by style and color. Silver, White Gold, Gold, Rose Gold—" 

“ _Do not_ get her a rose gold ring.” Blair nudged Sterling out of the way, closing the tab for that particular style. “They’re usually more pink that rose gold and that’s just ugly.” She continued to scroll studying all of Sterling’s chosen designs. “Some of these are really nice. I like that infinity style. Subtle hint at forever.” She tapped the mouse pad zooming in on one specific ring. “God knows you could learn to be a little more subtle.” 

“Hey!” Sterling exclaimed insulted as she shoved her twin playfully. She flashed her sister a closed mouth smile then turned to admire the design. “That one is nice.” 

Blair shifted her stare to Sterling taking notice of the unsure expression on her face. “You know what we should do? We should pick out three styles then go check them out in person.” 

Sterling met her eyes, flashing her a curious look. 

“It’s more romantic if you do this stuff in person, Sterl.” Blair shrugged. “Picking something this important from a picture or two online... feels impersonal, and this is the opposite of that.” 

Sterling was taken back by her sister’s sudden bout of sincerity. “Wow. I think that might have been the nicest thing you’ve ever said about my relationship.” 

Blair chuckled, quietly as she looked down at her hands. “Yeah, well, even though April is a shrunken down version of mom,” she quipped, laughing at her sister’s confused expression. A genuine smile crossed her face. “She’s good for you and you’re really good for her. So, you need to make sure you truly fall in love with the ring you get her because this is your first step to that full on someday.” 

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Sterling teased, raising an eyebrow. 

Blair nudged her, rolling her eyes. “I’m good.” She checked the time on the screen and sighed. “Study break's over.” 

Sterling flashed her an adorable, toothy smile. “Do another one in an hour?” 

Blair smirked and nodded. “See ya then.” 

* * *

“You’re still studying?” Sterling asked, surprised by the sight of her girlfriend still bent over her desk. “Babe, it’s 9:30.” 

It was well past the time she and April agreed on for their nightly FaceTime call. April promised to be done with her studying and shut down all thoughts of school after 9pm. Sterling even gave her an extra thirty minutes so she could change and get ready for bed, just like she had done. Instead, April was still sitting at her desk hunched over her notebook with a stack of flashcards sitting her keyboard. 

“I know, I know.” April replied, resting her hand against her forehead. “Tomorrow’s exam is in one of my advanced placement classes and I _really_ can’t fail.” 

“April, you’re not going to fail,” Sterling assured her, a light amusement laced her tone. “You are going to stress yourself out though.” 

April cut her eyes toward the screen, a neutral expression covering her face. “Fifteen more minutes and I’ll wrap it up, I swear.” 

“No, you’re going to wrap it up now.” Sterling tried to maintain a stern expression but the surprised look on April’s face broke her and she chuckled. “Babe, please. It’s time to unwind.” 

April sighed, defeated as she leaned back in her chair and tossed her pen onto her desk. A tingle ran through Sterling’s chest at the full view of her girlfriend on her screen. Her hair was up and, even though she looked utterly exhausted, she was still gorgeous. What really made her heart flutter was the fact that April was wearing her hoodie. 

Her favorite hoodie. 

“You found my present?” Sterling questioned, beaming. 

April looked confused for a moment, following Sterling’s eye line. The confusion faded and a half smile tugged at the corner of her mouth. The half cat half unicorn sitting dead center on her chest was almost as adorable as her girlfriend. She returned her attention to Sterling, feeling the faint heat on the tips of her ears. 

“Yeah, I found it lying on my bed.” April responded, sliding her hands into the front pocket. “I can't believe you left it for me. Thank you." 

Sterling snorted a laugh. “I can’t believe you didn’t realize I wasn’t wearing it when I left.” 

April shrugged. “You’re really distracting.” 

“I do what I can,” she said, lifting the covers and angling the camera so April would catch a peek. "C'mon, get in bed. It won't be with me, not yet at least, but this will be waiting for you." 

April narrowed her eyes, not taking the bait. No matter how adorably sexy her girlfriend looked in her teddy bear pajama pants and matching top. She could not allow herself to get wrapped up in thoughts of whatever Sterling had going on under her comforter. If she did, every bit of studying she’d done would go out the window. 

“I should go brush my teeth,” April announced, swerving Sterling’s obvious attempted distraction. 

“Boo, you’re no fun,” Sterling teased, chuckling when April shot her a look. She watched as her girlfriend distanced herself from the phone. “Are you just going to leave me?” 

April didn’t respond. Instead, she wrapped her hands around the hem of her hoodie also taking hold of the hem of the tank top underneath. She lifted slowly as she walked showing small strips of skin with each step. She was inches from her bathroom door, still within Sterling’s view, as she lifted the hoodie up even further fully showing the small of her back. 

“Uh, babe…” 

The words had barely left Sterling’s mouth before April pulled the hoodie all the way off then closed the bathroom door behind her. Sterling felt like her brain had short circuited the moment April lifted her hoodie. Now, she was sitting on the other side of a FaceTime call waiting eagerly for the bathroom door to open. Hoping she would get to see the outcome of April’s semi innocent strip show. 

Sterling propped herself further up against her pillows and waited as the door slowly opened. April emerged from the bathroom and Sterling knew she should be disappointed that her girlfriend was now wearing a tank top and a pair of baggy sweatpants. There was a mischievous grin behind the toothbrush hanging from the corner of her mouth as she shuffled over and picked the phone up from the stand. 

“Sorry. Didn’t meant to leave you out here,” April said, but Sterling could tell from her tone that she was anything _but_ sorry. 

Sterling shot her a look. “Like I’ve said before, you are way too good at this.” 

April feigned innocence as she continued to brush her teeth bringing Sterling along with her. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.” She stepped back into the bathroom, shifting the phone away while she rinsed the toothpaste from her mouth. She brought Sterling back into view holding the phone at a short distance. “I was just changing for bed.” 

“Uh huh…” Sterling giggled, watching as April turned off the bathroom light and walked back into her bedroom. “You look even better in that tank top then you did in my hoodie.” 

“You mean my hoodie,” April corrected as she pulled her comforter back and slid underneath the warm material. “Oh, I meant to ask you, how did things go with Blair?” 

Sterling snuggled down into the pillows behind her. “We talked a little bit. I still think something’s going on with her. She seems off.” 

“You know she’ll tell you when she’s ready.” 

“Yeah, I know.” Excitement lit up her beautiful blue eyes suddenly. “Oh! She helped me pick out your Christmas present.” 

April grinned. “Really? Did you find the perfect pair of fuzzy socks?” 

“We found three, actually.” 

“Three? That’s almost as many—“ April clamped her mouth closed, cutting herself off. 

Sterling eyed her suspiciously. “Almost as many what?” 

April shook her head. “Nothing.” She brought her hand to her mouth, feigning a yawn. “Wow, it’s getting late and I’m super tired.” 

“April Stevens…” Sterling warned, the same skeptical expression on her face. “Did you buy me more than one Christmas gift?” 

April yawned again. “I should really get to sleep. I love you so much, honey.” 

“April!” 

“Goodnight! Dream of me!” 

“Ap—“ Sterling growled playfully before the screen went black, ending their call…


	15. "Ugly Christmas sweater..."

Breakfast was family time in the Wesley household. Debbie insisted on seeing everybody around the table every day as they discussed what the day would hold, and more importantly right now, to Sterling at least, what the heck was up with Blair. 

Sterling stirred her bowl filled with sugary cereal goodness as she pondered what could possibly be weighing on her twin’s mind to the point where threats of serious violence seemed a perfectly natural conclusion to things. 

Being put in a painful arm lock or two over the years was nothing compared to the murderous look on Blair’s face yesterday. Sterling would gladly take a dislocated shoulder over that. Not that being afraid of being killed in her sleep by her sister was the reason she slept poorly last night. Not at all. 

“What’s on your mind, baby? You haven’t touched your cereal,” Debbie asked, regarding Sterling curiously. “And I even made sure to get your favorite this time.” 

“It’s nothing,” Sterling looked away, certain that her mom could see clear as day where her mind was about to take her. “I was just thinking how weird it is that April doesn’t like breakfast foods.” 

“She doesn’t eat breakfast? That don’t sound too healthy to me, and I can’t believe April would ever--” 

“Oh no, mom, she just doesn’t like the sugary stuff. She’ll do a savory breakfast.” 

“Well, that’s good then. Though how somebody can resist a French toast is beyond my comprehension.” 

“Right! Or a stack of pancakes simply swimming in maple syrup?” 

“It’s such a wholesome, all-American breakfast." 

“I guess she doesn’t have much of a sweet tooth.” 

Debbie smiled and reached out, placing a hand over Sterling’s. “Well, she loves you and you’re sweet.” 

“Mom! Ohmygosh!” Sterling blushed, Debbie’s perfectly innocent comment triggering a cascade of images filled with things that would never be appropriate to entertain around her mother. 

“Nah, sis, mom’s got a point. Stevens certainly has a taste for you,” Blair appeared out of nowhere, looking prepared to head out without ever sitting down for breakfast. “You’re definitely her favorite snack.” 

“Blair! That’s entirely—” 

“Tell me it’s not true. C’mon, I dare that blushing mess I see quivering before me--” 

“Blair Wesley! You stop that.” 

Blair snapped to attention. “Yes, ma’am. I’ll stop.” She grabbed an apple and headed towards the door. “I gotta leave anyway. Laters taters.” 

"Hey Blair, wait, I still need a ride..." Sterling began. 

"It's okay baby, your daddy is dropping her off. The Volt is still in the driveway. Antlers 'n all." 

"Rudolph. His name is Rudolph." 

"Not according to your sister. Take it up with her." 

Sterling shook her head and made a face. "I don't want to get back on her bad side. It's dark and scary there." 

"Now that you mention it, she did seem to be in a bit of a mood yesterday,” Debbie agreed, head bobbing in a slight nod “Any idea what was going on yesterday.“? 

“I asked, but she just waved it off like it was nothing.” 

“Nothing doesn't usually come with a warning about hearing damage,” Debbie said, laughing at how irate Anderson had become the third time Blair blasted that frankly indecent song about the Grinch. “Is it about a boy?” 

Sterling shook her head. “Blair would not hide that from us. And that tracking device Bowser put on our car would give her anyway immediately anyway.” 

“You know about that?” Debbie looked surprised before the facts became blindingly obvious. “He told you.” 

“Yes he did, but he still installed it and told us if he caught us fiddling with it, we would be his next target and that he’d pursue us like any other skip.” 

Debbie chuckled, vividly imagining the look on Bowser’s face during that conversation. 

“You can trust him. And us. If anything serious was the matter, you’d know,” Sterling said earnestly. 

“If she tells you, you’ll tell me, won’t you?” Debbie told her daughter, sitting up straighter when she saw the questioning look on Sterling’s face. “If it’s warranted, obviously. I’m not asking you to be a double-agent.” 

“Of course, mom. No secrets.” 

“Oh, then I probably shouldn’t ask you this.” 

“What?” Sterling leaned closer to her mom. 

She laughed and poked Sterling’s shoulder. “I just wanted to ask if you thought you could spare a few moments after school to help me with something.” 

“Oh.” Sterling said, relieved the lack of true secrets remained constant. “Tell me to jump and how high… ma’am,” she added with a little salute. 

“I know you’re busy with midterms, but I want us to get April something. A present from the family, and I do not think there is any use in disputing that you know her better than any of us.” 

Sterling smiled and nodded proudly, thankful for her mom, thankful for her whole family, which now included the world’s cutest little lesbian, her wonderful girlfriend, April. She’d never stop feeling proud of them. 

* * *

The bell rang, signaling the end of the second class of the day. Which also meant April’s most stressful exam of the day was done. Sterling hurried down the hall searching for her girlfriend through the crowd of Willingham students. A flash of honey brown hair two students away caught her attention and she apologized as she pushed through a group standing in the center of the hall, too busy stressing over their own upcoming exams to realize they were blocking the way. 

Sterling took a few more hurried steps and finally caught up to April. She walked quietly behind her for a moment admiring the way April absentmindedly played with her hair. April seemed to be relaxed, which probably meant her exam went well. Then again, she was incredibly good at hiding and compartmentalizing things until the time came to actually deal with them. 

Before Sterling could stop herself, she reached out and grabbed her girlfriend’s sides, squeezing affectionately but hard enough to cause her to jump. April spun around, a mixture of surprise and annoyance filled her features. Sterling couldn’t stop the laugh that escaped her at the sight of her love’s death glare. 

“Sterling, I’ve told you not to do that,” April stated harshly but there was still a lightness to her tone. She lightly pushed Sterling’s shoulder. “It’s not funny.” 

Sterling raised her hand, pinching her fingers together. “It was a little funny.” She pulled April closer, giving her a quick kiss. “So, how was the big exam?” 

“One of the big exams,” April corrected as Sterling shifted her embrace and took her hand. She smiled as they continued down the hall side by side. “It went well. I’m fairly certain I passed.” 

“You nailed it, babe. No doubt.” Sterling smiled, swinging their hands back and forth. “You seem less stressed. Bet a good night’s sleep would have helped even more.” 

April looked at her slightly confused. “What are you talking about? I slept like a baby.” 

Sterling scoffed. “Must be nice.” 

“You didn’t sleep well, honey?” 

Sterling narrowed her eyes, giving her girlfriend a knowing look. “No, I did not.” 

April hummed; a half smile pulled at the corner of her mouth. “Well, who’s fault is that?” 

“Yours,” Sterling stated without hesitation as she tugged April closer. “Totally yours.” 

April chuckled lightly and turned her head, placing a small kiss against Sterling’s shoulder. “Oh, by the way, I won’t be at lunch. I’m going to the library to study some more.” 

“Aw,” Sterling pouted. Lunch was the one time she and April could spend non class related time together. “Do you want a study buddy? I can skip lunch and study with you.” 

“Hannah B., is going to be with me,” April responded as they stopped by the door of her next class. “Besides, you can’t be trusted to actually study.” 

Sterling gasped, dramatically. “I can too!” 

April raised an eyebrow knowingly. “Sterl, the last time we were in the library together, you tried to disgrace the Christian reading section.” 

Sterling smirked, mischievously as she rested her hands on April’s hips, tugging her closer. “You didn’t seem to mind.” 

“I told you to behave.” 

“Yeah, but that could mean so many different things.” 

April made face. “In what Universe?” 

“Our love Universe,” Sterling quipped, wiggling her eyebrows. 

April half rolled her eyes, scoffing a small laugh. “You already know what I’m going to call you, right?” 

“Adorable? Charming? Irresistible?” Sterling questioned, hopefully. 

“Ridiculous,” April rectified, tilting her chin upward. “You’re going to be late for class. I’ll see you later in Spanish…” She leaned in, hovering her lips close to Sterling’s and finished her statement in a soft, sensual whisper, “Senorita Carolina.” 

Sterling balked, barely feeling the press of April’s kiss before she turned and walked inside her classroom. She shook herself from her haze and shot in mock glare at April’s retreating form. “You are so mean!” she stated, loud enough for April to hear her. 

April tossed a wave over her shoulder. “Good luck on your exam, honey! Love you!” 

“This is not where my mind needs to be before _my_ exam,” Sterling mumbled to herself as she turned, dramatically dragging her feet and walking toward her own class. 

* * *

Sterling sat on the couch in the family room scrolling through various websites. 

She was supposed to be helping her mother pick out a gift for April and she thought she was doing a pretty great job. She had several sites and items pinned. Things she knew April would absolutely adore. When Debbie returned from getting their drinks, Sterling had about thirty items ready for her to pick from. 

“Here you go, baby,” Debbie said, handing Sterling a glass. 

Sterling accepted the drink with a bright smile. She shifted over making room for Debbie to sit beside her. “Okay, I found a whole bunch of things April would love,” she said, taking a sip from her drink and placing the glass down. “Here let me show you.” She brought the laptop closer, and Debbie shifted against her side. “So, I found this super cute sundress. Like, I guess it’s kinda sexy, but not overly sexy… I mean, she can still wear it to church-“ 

Debbie rested her arm against the back of the couch, pressing her index finger against her temple, looking at her daughter describing how the dress would be perfect fit for April, gesturing excitedly. She especially noticed Sterling flailing when talking about how the halter neck would flatter April’s strong shoulders. “Mmhmm. What else did you find?” 

Sterling stopped and looked at her mom, wondering what was wrong with a cute sundress. She started flicking through the tabs, quickly closing the one containing the Slow Burn candle from Boy Smells; she wanted to be the one to buy that for April. “This purse is really cute. And practical. It’s not as big as the totes we use for school, but still big enough for April to have most essential--” 

“Sterling, it’s also four-hundred dollars.” 

“Well, it _is_ Kate Spade...” 

“And I’m not sure it’s appropriate for a gift that I and your father are giving your girlfriend to prominently feature a heart.” 

“Don’t you love her?” Sterling wrinkled her nose, trying to understand what was inappropriate about a purse. Even one with a heart. Surely April had captured all their hearts. 

“Baby, of course we do.” Debbie leaned in. “Just not like you do. Maybe next year you can save up and get her that purse yourself.” 

Sterling pouted. “Next year I will be a starving college student struggling to make ends meet.” 

Debbie stared at her daughter in disbelief and threw her head back, laughing loudly. “Oh, baby, the ways in which you are ridiculous will never cease to surprise me.” 

“What?” Sterling felt her pout start to take over. What was ridiculous was how her girlfriend—who supposedly loved her—and her mom—who was genetically predisposed to love her—both found it so easy and enjoyable to call her ridiculous. Even it was said in affection. 

Her mother looked at her, with love filling her features, Sterling admitted to herself, and wrapped an arm around her, pulling her close. “I’m sorry for laughing, truly I am. But Sterling, this time next year you’ll be off at college, living in sin with your girlfriend in an off-campus apartment provided to you by your loving parents. You’re so blessed it’s ridiculous.” 

“Don’t say sin. There’s nothing wrong or sinful about me and April.” 

Debbie moved her hand up and soothed her daughter, stroking her hair. “I didn’t mean to imply that, baby. You know we all love April and couldn’t be happier or more proud about the two of you.” 

"Mom, we are in love. And God wants us to be with the ones we love so it's not a sin!" Sterling slumped back after her outburst, curling closer to her mom, muttering silently, “There’s been no sinning happening.” 

A knowing smile appeared, and Debbie looked at her daughter fondly. “Hey, we still haven’t picked out a gift for April.” She gave Sterling a nudge. “How about we get back to that?” 

Still clinging to her mom, Sterling whined in frustration. “What was wrong with my suggestions?” 

“They were lovely suggestions,” Debbie conceded, “but maybe not suitable for the girlfriend’s parents to give.” She reached out and took the laptop. She slid her index finger across the mouse pad looking through a few of the tabs Sterling had left open. “By the way, April and Beth will be joining us for our fun little party on Saturday, right?” 

Sterling glanced at her mother catching the excited glint in her eyes at the mention of her party. She wanted to do something different this year. Something unexpected. So, the Wesley’s were throwing an ugly sweater Christmas party. Sterling was looking forward to seeing her mother’s conservative Christian friends dressed up in some God awful sweaters. 

She had a suspicion that they would still find a way to snob it up though. 

“They are, but I don’t think April owns an ugly sweater.” 

Sterling paused, thinking over April’s wardrobe. She had never seen her girlfriend dress anywhere close to ugly. On top of that, there had been many times when she had randomly gone through April’s closet and there wasn’t anything in there that could be classified as ugly or even fun. She really didn’t start wearing more relaxed clothing until John Stevens was no longer part of their life. Holding her and her wardrobe up to unreasonable standards. 

“No ugly sweater? Well, that’s no fun. We should get her one of those,” Debbie suggested, quickly typing something in the search bar. “Oh, what about one of these?” 

Sterling leaned into her mother and snuggled into her shoulder as she looked over the selection of sweaters. She wrinkled her nose, knowing anyone of these would cause April to make that face where she hates something but is too polite to say it. Sterling loved that face. A particularly festive one with a Santa and his eight tiny reindeer sat in the center of the screen. She knew April would hate it. 

So, of course it was perfect. 

“How much for that ugly Christmas sweater?” Sterling asked, pointing at the screen. 

“Oh, that doesn’t matter, sweetie.” 

“You just complained about a purse.” 

“Four hundred dollars is very different to twenty dollars, baby.” Debbie clicked on the sweater pulling up the size chart. “So, you think we should get this one?” 

Sterling nodded, making noise of agreement. “But our party is before Christmas.” She flashed an adorable pout. “If you get this for her, she won’t have anything from you guys on Christmas morning.” 

“No, no, baby. This is just a part of the family type gift,” Debbie explained, clicking on another tab she had open in the background. “I was thinking about getting her this comforter set. Something for her and your new place when you all go off to school.” 

“That would be nice,” Sterling agreed, smiling warmly up at her mother. She shifted her position on the couch, looping her arm through her mom’s and rested her head on her shoulder as she browsed different comforter sets. “You really are the best, mom.” 

Debbie smiled, turning to press a kiss to the top of Sterling’s head. “Well, you all make it pretty easy.” 

* * *

After dinner, Sterling made her way back up to her bedroom checking her phone along the way. She had been so busy online shopping with her mother that she’d completely disregarded her phone which was highly unusual for her. That fact was even more solidified by the four missed text messages from April waiting on her screen. 

**April** 💞  
I know you’re busy with your mom, but I  
needed a distraction and you’re my favorite one. 

**April** 💞  
All this studying is driving me crazy and  
it’s only Tuesday. I don’t know how I’m going to survive. 

**April** 💞  
Friday can’t get here soon enough.  
Just the thought of spending time with you…  
and everyone else… but mostly you is the only thing keeping me sane right now. 

**April** 💞  
I miss you. I love you. I am going  
to throw every textbook I own out  
of the window I stg. 

Sterling shook her head, laughing at her girlfriend’s succession of frantic messages. She flopped down on her bed, tucking her pillow underneath her head. She quickly typed back a message hoping to calm whatever level of studying anxiety April had reached.

 **Sterl** 🤸  
🥰👻🔥🌈🤸💦🤸💦☃️ **April** 💞  
Sterling, what is that? I really don't have  
the brain capacity to decipher gibberish right now.

 **Sterl** 🤸  
You said you needed a distraction.  
Cute emojis are a distraction. 

**April** 💞  
When I said distraction, I meant you, Sterl.  
You and your adorable face, not tiny,  
indecipherable pictures. 

**Sterl** 🤸  
Aww, babe 😊 Do you want to FT? 

**April** 💞  
I would but we shouldn’t. We’ll get sucked  
into a vortex and studying will be null and void. 

**Sterl** 🤸  
You really up vocabulary when your  
brain is locked in study mode. 

**April** 💞  
Do you still love me? 

**Sterl** 🤸  
Even more than I ever thought I could. 

Sterling pressed her teeth into her bottom lip, contemplating an idea running through her mind. She raised her phone higher and puffed out her cheeks making the most adorable face possible. She took a photo then brought her phone back down, inspecting the image. Satisfied with the level of cuteness, she typed a quick message and sent the photo to April.

 **Sterl** 🤸  
Does that make everything better? 

**April** 💞  
Much. 😊 I miss you so much. I wish we could  
have seen each other for a little longer after school today. 

**Sterl** 🤸  
Me too. I’m sorry I couldn’t hang out longer.  
My mom really needed my help with something. 

**April** 💞  
Anything important?

Sterling considered for a moment, knowing full-well that answering this would mean telling her girlfriend a tiny, well-meaning white lie, but still, it felt wrong to her. So she decided to tell the truth, after a fashion.

 **Sterl** 🤸  
It’s a surprise. You’re familiar with  
Christmas traditions, right? 

**April** 💞  
So you were talking about my present?  
Wait, you’re getting your mom involved? 

**Sterl** 🤸  
Didn't I already tell you Blair helped me pick? 

**April** 💞  
Yes, which is why I was confused. Are you  
familiar with how people work? Memory? 

**Sterl** 🤸  
Not really. You’re really hard to figure out. 

**April** 💞  
Am not. 

**Sterl** 🤸  
Compared to me? You’re an enigma. 

**April** 💞  
Compared to you grade school math is hard to figure out. 

**Sterl** 🤸  
I’m insulted. 1+2=3 was hard. 

**April** 💞  
Compared to you that might as well be a differential calculus. 

**Sterl** 🤸  
Are you calling me easy? 

**April** 💞  
I’m calling you unsubtle. 

**Sterl** 🤸  
I’ve missed this. 

**April** 💞  
Bickering? 

**Sterl** 🤸  
Maybe. 

**April** 💞  
You’re incorrigible. 

**Sterl** 🤸  
I’ve missed your lips. 

**April** 💞  
Sterl... 

**Sterl** 🤸  
I’ve missed your hair. 

**April** 💞  
We weren’t going to do this. 

**Sterl** 🤸  
I’ve missed your smell. 

**April** 💞  
Please. 

**Sterl** 🤸  
Are you thinking about the exam? 

**April** 💞  
You know I’m not. 

**Sterl** 🤸  
Good. That’s what I call a successful distraction. 

**April** 💞  
… I love you, but sometimes I can’t stand you.

**Sterl** 🤸  
🥰😘🥰😘😍😍😍💖💖💖

Sterling smiled to herself. She scrolled back up through the conversation, imagining April’s reaction every time her phone buzzed with a new message. Maybe tonight _she_ would be the one having a restless night. Flicking over to the photo library, she opened the album containing her favorite images of April; it wasn’t the same as watching her laugh during one of their nightly FaceTime calls, but it would have to do.

A few minutes went by and Sterling tried to pull herself away from making googly eyes at April’s cute face. Midterm Madness really had excised any quality time out of their day-to-day life. Gosh, she’d just had a conversation with April, but she missed her so much. She missed her lips. She missed her hair. She missed her smell. With a groan, Sterling realized she had played herself. 

And she still had to study.


	16. "Lotion..."

When Sterling originally coined the phrase Midterm Madness--though she was certain she’d just heard it somewhere else and repeated it as a joke to describe what she thought this week would be like--she did not expect there to be any actual madness involved. Tons of stress and studying and performance anxiety and near breakdowns over not being able to recall just the right facts when faced with an empty answer sheet, sure. 

What Sterling was experiencing was none of those. Then again, her madness had nothing to do with the midterms to begin with. 

She sat alone in her room, books open, flashcards ready, laptop--still sporting a solid black background where a cute photo of April should be--on standby in case she needed to do some research. They were in the homestretch now, over half the week done, so she should feel something resembling relief. She was pretty certain she had performed as expected so far, despite small hiccups involving a teasing girlfriend rolling her R’s. 

The very same girlfriend who simply refused to study with Sterling right now. The word “distraction” was thrown around a lot, and maybe April had a point. That didn’t mean she had any right to ban Sterling from the group study session currently taking place at the Stevens house. So of course, she had. 

It was all so unfair. It wasn’t like she was going to jump April in front of all their friends. She just missed being around her; she missed her hair, her lips, her smell… Sterling groaned. Those things had been on her mind even more than usual after her foolish attempt at teasing April last night had backfired. She was pretty sure it had the intended effect on April, but it had also led her down this path of… madness. 

She closed the book and with it any chance of getting April off her mind. 

Initially, the knowledge of what was coming in a few short days had put her mind at ease. She could breathe again. Then reality steamrolled her calm and pulled April away from her. Absence is supposed to make the heart grow fonder, but Sterling had learned, the hard way, that it also had other consequences. Somehow, being denied much more than quick, chaste kisses in the school hallway and next to no time spent in-person, face-to-face, meant that April lived rent free in her mind. 

Their nightly FaceTime sessions didn’t help either because she couldn’t kiss April’s lips, play with her hair or sense her smell over video. 

And then there was the teasing. Oh god, she’d had a go at the queen, and she’d missed, or at least been out-teased. Significantly. It had gotten out of hand. The tantalizing glimpse she’d been given of April’s back and shoulders was still etched in her mind. She felt silly acknowledging just how much it had affected her, when soon she’d be privy to parts of April she previously only could’ve dreamed of. And she’d done a lot of that lately. Thinking, dreaming, fantasizing. Of April, and her parts. 

Once she got her first taste of what being with April would be like, that afternoon in the storage room, nothing had really worked like before. At first she found it frustrating how much less fulfilling their near-miss made everything seem in comparison, even when thoughts of April would normally make her nightly explorations so much more, so much better, than the empty snack of quickly rubbing one out. April was a three-course meal. A meal she couldn’t wait to devour. And Sterling was _hungry_. 

A burning feeling crept across her face, and she realized she was blushing. Not because of how stupidly one-track her mind had become. She felt ashamed of using such crude language thinking of something that was truly precious and special to her. Under normal circumstances she would never use those terms, but there was nothing normal about her current state of horniness. 

Having _those_ thoughts used to be a secret she kept close to her heart, but lately she’d been opening up, not only being honest with herself—because she didn’t want a repeat of her previous sexual experience, and Blair had made some salient points all those months ago—but also sharing her desire with April. Though April would probably tell her they were written across her adorable, unsubtle face, clear as day to anyone looking. 

The thought of anybody but April looking at her and realizing what was going on inside her head was almost too much. Sometimes she even had to will herself to forget some of the unfortunate images she had come across the first time she allowed her curiosity to overcome propriety and went online looking for what she might expect once you left the basics behind. Sterling might regard April with lust filling her looks but seeing complete strangers in intimate situations still felt _wrong_. 

She wondered if April let that stop her. The way she’d casually mentioned that her research made the most of everything available online sent tingles down Sterling’s spine. It wasn’t just the possibilities that she found exciting; her own research had come to a halt when she encountered an article about all the various types of orgasms you could have, and once she reached “the fabled G-spot orgasm” there had been some rather aggressively explicit drawings of recommend fingering techniques that made her quickly shut the lid of her laptop and take a moment to cool off. 

But not before she’d bookmarked the article and several other interesting links. For research. For later. For when April showed her what articles she had read. And not by opening up a web browser... It wasn’t the drawings that got to her. That wasn’t what she found exciting. It was the thought of April reading the same article and how it would be to experience all of that together. 

If they would be together. Sterling shook her head, shocked with herself. Two more days and Midterm Madness would be but a memory. (Or a blight reflected on their report cards.) Two more days and they would be up at the lake house, very much together. And still. 

She missed April so much that she ached. She missed her lips, her hair, her smell. The empty void left behind by a laser-focused April in serious study mode was turning into a black hole. She had to do something. She had to let April know. Maybe they could find ten minutes during school tomorrow and she could press herself so hard against April’s body and kiss her so senseless that she would absorb enough of her to last another day. 

Her phone was over on the bed, still black and lifeless, showing one single notification on the lock screen, Blair telling her she was on her way home and that they needed to talk. Nothing from April, not that she had expected anything. So, she unlocked the phone and set a single message to her girlfriend: _Hope your study sesh is going well! Miss you sooo much! Love you even more!_

Maybe 30 second went by--still nothing from April--before her thumbs started moving and she typed out several messages, each describing the parts of April she missed the most. 

* * *

April surveyed the coffee table pleased with their study session set up. Sometimes studying with her best friends proved to be more of a challenge than studying with Sterling. There had to be the correct type of drinks because hydration equaled brain power. And she had to make sure she set out everyone’s favorite snacks. Heaven forbid Ezequiel wasn’t able to eat an entire bag of cool ranch Doritos in one sitting. 

The chime of the doorbell echoed through the house and she moved swiftly toward the front door. She pulled the door open, a wide smile on her face as she prepared to greet her friends standing on the other side. Her expression dropped when she was met with the obviously irritated Ezequiel. 

She furrowed her brow looking around for their third counterpart. “Where is Hannah B.?” she asked, stepping to the side allowing him to enter. 

Ezequiel sucked his teeth and rolled his eyes. “Don’t even get me started,” he said as he stepped inside their Stevens household. He turned on his heels facing April as she closed the door behind them. “She said something about having to run by the mall because they were having a big sale and she couldn’t miss out.” 

April took in a deep breath, calming herself after hearing their schedule being chipped away. “She does realize we have a limited amount of study time right?” 

Ezequiel shrugged, following behind April as they made their way to the family room. “According to her she will be twenty minutes ‘at the latest’.” He looked around, placing his bookbag down on the couch. “No Sterling?” 

April shook her head as she organized their studying materials. “Sterling can’t be trusted to focus on studying with too many people around.” 

Ezequiel hummed knowingly as he raised an eyebrow. “Gets a little handsy, does she?” 

April could feel the tips of her ears pink from the implications of his statement. She cleared her throat bringing her composure back in line. “She gets chatty,” she lied, placing some flashcards down on the table. “Which distracts everyone.” 

“Chatty. Okay.” A smug smirked crossed his face as he settled into the couch. 

Silence filled the space around them as they continued to set up for their study session. April tried not to seem jolted by Ezequiel’s assumption concerning Sterling’s presence… or lack thereof. As much as she would have loved to have Sterling join them, she knew there would be absolutely no way she would get any real studying done. 

She and Sterling hadn’t spent a lot of time together over the last few days. There were a few quick moments between classes and one extremely hilarious Spanish conversation. She was grateful the rest of the class were involved in their own discussions. The innuendos they were saying to one another truly were not appropriate in a classroom setting. And another reason April could not allow Sterling to join them. 

“How are you all doing anyway?” Ezequiel asked as he unpacked his laptop. 

“We’re great,” April answered, laying some flashcards out on the table. She glanced at him from the corner of her eye. “You’ll be happy to know I heard your voice in my head before I bought her another gift just because.” 

“Good for you having self-control,” he teased, looking over at her. He shifted his gaze up and down, giving her an inquisitive glance. “And everything else?” 

April looked confused as she met his gazes. “What do you mean?” 

Ezequiel sighed, leaning back against the couch. “I guess I’m just nosey best friend here and subtly asking if you two-you know-“ He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively. 

April made a surprised sound and reached down to grab a throw pillow. “That’s none of your business,” she stated, swinging the pillow smacking him playfully on the arm. 

Ezequiel caught the pillow and wrestled it away from her. “I’ll take that as a no.” 

“Take it more like a not yet.” 

April braced herself waiting for Ezequiel’s teasing best friend response. She was fully expecting a loud, exaggerated gasp followed up with a speech about safe sex practices and how she need to make sure she hits all the right spots. Instead, Ezequiel surprised her touching her gently on the arm to get her full attention. She was a little overcome by the sincerity of her best friend’s expression. 

“I’m guessing you all have discussed it then?” 

“Of course we have.” 

Ezequiel nodded. “Good. That’s good.” He clutched her throw pillow close to his chest. “Communication is important.” 

April took a seat beside him on the couch. “It’ll be our first time. Definitely not our only time, but our first time.” She sighed and fidgeted with her hands, suddenly feeling the need to distract herself from going to far off the rails. “Luckily, we live in a time with easy access to unlimited information so hopefully I won’t be horribly clueless when the time comes.” 

Ezequiel scoffed, giving her a loving shove. “Girl, like I said, communication is important,” he stressed, a half smirk formed on his mouth. “I have no doubts you’re going to kill it in the sack and Sterling is going to see stars and-“ 

“Okay, okay. Can we not delve that far into this?” she requested, light amusement lacing her tone. “If we get bogged down with the possibilities of what might or might not happen, we will never get any studying done.” 

“You’re right. You’re right.” Ezequiel raised his hands in mock surrender. He gave her a look letting her know she wasn’t completely off the hook. “When the time does come… details.” He motioned his hand like he was sculpting out a rainbow. “All the details.” 

April knitted her brow. “ _All_ the details?” 

Ezequiel thought for a moment then wrinkled his nose. “Well… maybe not _all_ the details.” 

They shared a small laugh and April felt her heart swell in her chest. She had never been more thankful for her friend. The support he and Hannah B had shown her throughout all of the changes in her life was more than she could have ever hoped for. Even when things in her world weighed her down and caused her to treat them poorly, they still stood by her. 

She never thought she would be so lucky. 

“Oh, April, there you are,” her mother said as she made her way into the family room carrying some packages. She looked over at Ezequiel offering him a welcoming smile. “Hello, Ezequiel, so nice to see you.” 

“You as well, Mrs. Stevens,” he returned as he and April stood simultaneously. He took a few steps forward and held his hands out. “Let me help you with those.” 

Mrs. Stevens politely waved him off. “No, thank you, sweetie. I’ve got it.” She motioned her head toward the front foyer. “You all might want to go outside and help Hannah B. though. She’s in the driveway and seems to be struggling with some things.” 

Ezequiel and April exchanged a look then quickly made their way outside. They hurried out of the door and down the two small front steps before coming to a halt in the driveway. Hannah B stood beside her car struggling with an array of different bags. Although her school items were secured around her around and neck, it was the excessive amount of shopping bags that seemed to be giving her the issue. 

She glanced over at her friends trying her hardest not to drop anything. “Hey, guys, can you help me out?” 

“Girl, did you buy the whole mall?” Ezequiel asked, closing the distance between them. 

April joined him taking a few bags from her grasp. “Seriously, Hannah B., what did you buy?” 

“Well…” Hannah B. began as she steadied herself and kicked her car door closed. “Bath and Body Works was having a sale on their holiday scents, so I bought twenty bottles of lotion.” 

“Twenty?!” Ezequiel exclaimed. He shook his head and made a noise filled with disbelief. “Do you even know twenty people?” 

Hannah B. balked insulted as they walked toward the front door. “I know twenty people!” She shifted the packages in her hand. “And I was thinking a couple could be stocking stuffers for you guys. And Sterling and Blair too.” 

“That’s actually a great idea, Hannah B.,” Ezequiel said, looking at April from the corner of his eye. A smug smirk formed on his lips. “Lotions can be very useful so you should make sure you give Sterling a really good smelling one.” 

April bit her bottom lip and refused to meet Ezequiel’s self-satisfied expression. 

Hannah B. followed them up the small steps. She released a loud gasp then reached out tugging on April’s sleeve. “I bought one called Twisted Peppermint. Do you think Sterling would like that one?” 

Ezequiel opened the door and turned to look at them. “Depends. Is it edible?” 

April dropped her jaw, swatting at her friend as he laughed, blocking her attack. 

“I’m not sure, but we can always read the bottle,” Hannah B answered. A confused expression crossed her face when April flashed her a small pout before wrapping her arm around her shoulders and walking her inside. She sighed, mirroring April’s pout. “I missed the joke again, didn’t I?” 

April rubbed her shoulder empathetically. “It’s okay, Hannah B. Ezequiel just needs to focus more on studying and less on the _gutter_ his mind has slipped into.” 

“Whatever.” Ezequiel huffed, rolling his eyes as they made their way into the family room… 

* * *

It wasn’t long after they settled in that the Trinity fell into their normal studying routine. They exchanged flashcards, researched answers, and quizzed one another on points they felt would be part of their exams. They’d been so focused that the sudden sound of April’s phone vibrating on the coffee table caused April to jump. 

She reached out, stopping the vibration and picked up her phone, glancing at the screen. A message from Sterling sat at the top of her notifications and she felt the smile spread across her face instantly. 

**Sterl** 🤸  
Hope your study sesh is going well!  
Miss you sooo much! Love you even more! 

April’s thumb hovered over the screen. She debated on responding right away but feared she would get wrapped up in a conversation she didn’t have time for at that particular moment. She exhaled, telling herself she would give Sterling her full attention as soon as she was done. 

Right now, she had to focus. 

She placed her phone back down and returned her attention to her books. She’d barely read the first line by the time her phone vibrated again. Then again. Then once more. The sound of Ezequiel’s knowing, amused huff echoed in her ear. The tips of her ears heated turning a deep shade of red. She raised her hand, scratching at her ear attempting to block the flush from his view. 

From the sound of his laughter, she was far too late. 

Her phone vibrated again, and she reached bringing the phone more into view. She hesitated briefly before reluctantly placing her phone on do not disturb. She pushed her tongue against her cheek feeling guilty for silencing her girlfriend. She promised herself she would make it up to Sterling later during their FaceTime call. 

Hopefully, Sterling wouldn’t spiral into a panic, but April knew even that might be asking for a little too much… 

* * *

Sterling was spiraling. 

Well, maybe spiraling was a bit dramatic, but she was definitely freaking out. It had been a few hours since she sent a succession of text messages to her girlfriend and she still hadn’t received a single response. No “I love you too”. No “I miss you too”. Not even a “Sterling, you should be studying”. Nothing. Not one thing. 

Sterling released a noise that sounded like a mixture of a whine and a growl before tossing her phone down onto her bed. She flopped back dramatically next to it, covering her eyes with her arm. She continued to mutter to herself, probably sounded on the edge of being considered crazy but she didn’t care. 

“Dude, what is with you?” Blair asked as she plopped down beside Sterling. 

“April is ignoring me,” she mumbled, flipping onto her stomach and burying her face into her pillow. “She hasn’t responded to me in hours.” 

Blair chuckled, digging through the bag of chips she’d snuck upstairs. “She’s studying, Sterl. She’s not ignoring you.” 

Sterling propped herself up on her elbows, narrowing her eyes. “Whose side are you on?” 

“You know I said the same thing to April the other day concerning mom.” Blair huffed a small laugh and popped a handful of chips into her mouth. “Don’t you guys normally have a kissy-kissy face-face time-time call in a few hours?” She nudged her twin. “I think you can survive until then.” 

“I guess.” Sterling released a small whine as she flopped back onto her back. She pushed herself upward and rested against the headboard, sitting level beside Blair. She turned her head slightly, so she was looking at her sister. “So, what did you want to talk to me about?” 

“Oh, right…” Blair placed her half empty bag of chips down on her sister’s nightstand and wiped her hands together. She inched away from the headboard turning her body, so she was facing Sterling, tucking her legs underneath her. “Um… I’m not really sure where to start.” 

Sterling furrowed her brow and shifted, mirroring her sister’s position. “Okay, Blair, I’m kind of already on high anxiety alert and I really don’t think I can handle anything crazy right now.” 

“It’s not crazy. I promise.” 

“Alright then, tell me. What’s going on?” 

Blair took in a deep breath as she wrapped her hand around Sterling’s comforter twisting it between her fingers. “I-“ She swallowed, pushing down the lump forming in her throat. “I got scouted by UCLA for lacrosse and I’m pretty sure I’m getting offered a scholarship.” She looked down at her hands, fearing the look of sadness she was certain formed on her twin’s face. “I’ve been thinking about this for a while now and I wasn’t really sure how to tell you.” 

Sterling opened her mouth to respond, but Blair continued. 

“I know I said I’d stay in Georgia and we would do the whole college experience together, but you’ve got April so you’re going to be fine.” She shrugged sheepishly. “And I’m pretty sure that realization is why I’ve been so moody the last couple of days. Our whole life it’s been me and you and now… you don’t really need me.” 

“Blair, that’s not true! You’re my sister. My soulmate. Of course I need you!” 

Blair chuckled, quietly and raised her head, finally meeting Sterling’s eyes once again. “What I meant to say was, if I didn’t think you’d be okay without me, I wouldn’t go. But you and April are going to build this _amazing_ life together during and after college and I think it’s time for me to build one of my own.” She reached out, taking Sterling’s hands in hers. “I really think this is the right move for me and I hope you understand.” 

Sterling held back her tears and breathed in to keep herself steady. The stress of exams, not hearing from her girlfriend, and now her sister thinking she no longer needed her was weighed on her more than she cared to admit. She shifted Blair’s grip on her hands, intertwining her fingers with her sisters, giving them a gentle squeeze. 

“I get it,” Sterling answered, finally. Her voice cracked with tears still threatening to fall. She cleared her throat, pushing them to the back of her mind. “And I’m going to miss you, but I am so proud of you for making your own path. That’s who you are and it’s only right for you to follow that.” 

Blair smiled as single tear escaped, sliding down her cheek. “I love you so much. And I promise we’ll talk every day.” 

“Twin swear?” 

“Twin swear.”

* * *

Sterling paced around her room, not really sure what to do. Their nightly FaceTime was about to take place, or at least it was planned to. Last night better have been an exception to the rule, not the new normal. She hated the new normal, even if the rational part of her brain once again reminded her that they’d crested the hateful hill and were heading back down towards the finish line. Sterling couldn’t wait for that to happen, because she knew she had the most amazing reward waiting for her. No trophy would ever be big enough to accurately represent how she felt for April, nothing ever more valuable to her than their love.

So why was she not calm. Oh, she knew why. She’d sent a bunch of cute texts, and maybe some that deserved a different classification. All of them met by stony silence.

The clock was nine on the dot when her phone came to life. Say what you will about April--and Sterling had some choice words in mind right now--but her dislike for tardiness was certainly reflected in her infallible punctuality. But it was not the FaceTime request that Sterling had expected. Instead she got a text message.

**April** 💞  
Honey, I’m so sorry about today. We were having  
such a good study session that I lost track of time  
or I would’ve texted back sooner.

Sterling huffed reading April’s words. She didn’t know what to think. They’d agreed to focus on midterms, but 30 seconds typing out a text with some cute emojis didn’t feel like too much to ask for. 30 seconds out of many, many hours.

**April** 💞  
I wanted to text you back, so badly, but I knew if I did  
I wouldn’t get any studying done, because I missed  
you too and barely getting to see you for these last  
few days have been so hard. I love you. Please forgive me.

**Sterl** 🤸  
🙏😚🤗😍😗😗😗😗😗😗😗

**April** 💞  
What did I say about all-emoji messages last night?

**Sterl** 🤸  
Sorry. You’re forgiven. I love you too. Can we pleeeeeease  
FT now? I need to see your face.

Sterling phone buzzed with a new message, but it’s not text. It’s April making a cute, adorable face, smiling widely.

**April** 💞  
Does that make it all better?

**Sterl** 🤸  
Much😍 But does that mean no FT? 😢

**April** 💞  
It’s a good thing I left my phone face down during the  
study session. I would’ve died if Ezequiel or Hannah  
saw the things you said.

**Sterl** 🤸  
Sorry, I got myself worked up. Like the storage room

**April** 💞  
Storage room, eh?

**Sterl** 🤸  
Yeah, it wasn’t pretty.

**April** 💞  
Impossible, you’re the prettiest of them all.

**Sterl** 🤸  
Them?😲😝

**April** 💞  
Shut up, you know what I mean. Take the compliment  
already. You’re being ridiculous.

Sterling can’t help smiling. If April was here she’d whine, pout and then laugh. Being called ridiculous has evolved and is almost akin to flirting now.

**April** 💞  
What did you say you missed the most about me?

So they are flirting-flirting after all.

**Sterl** 🤸  
Your lips.

She didn’t expect another picture in response, but when she saw April’s lips pouting at her like they’re ready to be kissed, she didn’t exactly complain.

**Sterl** 🤸  
Your hair.

April’s hair, draped across her face was in the photo that arrived shortly after Sterling sent off her message. She could make out her girlfriend’s sparkling eyes and nose barely poking out between the shiny strands.

**Sterl** 🤸  
Your smell.

**April** 💞  
Sorry, that's hard to replicate in a picture.

But Sterling’s phone still buzzed as a picture of April cradling a bottle of her favorite perfume close to her cheek filled the screen.

Sterling was just so happy. Everything about this was so cute and adorable, just like April. She wasn't here in the room with Sterling, but right now it didn’t matter. Sterling’s wrapped up in warm, fuzzy feelings when her phone buzzed for the fourth time.

It’s a mirror selfie. April’s wearing the loose fitting tank that Sterling first got to see as part of her lifting outfit. She’s facing away, her back turned to the mirror, her arms crossed in front of her, flexing so the muscles in her strong shoulders are very obvious.

Almost as obvious as Sterling, her mouth wide open as her eyes went wide and her breath hitched. Now she’s once again upset that April was not in the room with her, because if she was…

Her phone buzzed one final time and Sterling didn’t know it, but she was holding her breath. April has sent another mirror selfie. Her back is still turned, but now she has hoisted the tank up, revealing the tight-fitting lycra workout shorts that are clinging to her butt. And it’s just as glorious as it was in the storage room. And as Sterling's brain seized functioning, all she knew for sure is that she's most definitely, absolutely a butt woman.


	17. "Grab me a blanket.."

“April, hey!” 

April halted and turned at the sound of Sterling calling out her name. Sterling was practically running toward her and April felt a wave of giddiness was over her at the sight. The emotions Sterling made her feel still surprised her sometimes. She never expected to ever feel the ridiculous things written about in romance novels and fan fiction. But here she was. 

Feeling every bit of it for the girl clumsy bounding toward her. 

“Hey, Hon-“ 

She’d barely took a breath before Sterling’s lips were pressed against her own. Sterling wrapped one arm around her waist and pulled her flush against her body. Normally, she wouldn’t approve of this level of PDA, but she missed Sterling. She missed this. And it was the end of the school day, so it wasn’t like there were too many students lurking about. 

Her hand raised, and she cupped Sterling’s cheek, slowly breaking their kiss. She leaned back admiring the beautifully goofy smile lingering on her girlfriend’s face. “As I was saying,” she joked, feeling her breath hitch when Sterling’s blue eyes fluttered open. “Hey, honey.” 

Sterling bit her lip holding back her grin. “Hey, babe,” she returned, giving her another quick peck. “How was your exam?” She stepped out of their embrace and took April’s hand. 

April shifted her grip, intertwining their fingers as they strolled down the hall. She took in a deep breath then slowly exhaled. “I think I did pretty well. How was yours?” 

Sterling bounced her head from side to side and shrugged. “Not too bad. I think I did pretty well.” She turned her head slightly; curiosity filled her features. “What are your plans for the rest of the day?” 

“Another study session with Ezequiel and Hannah B.” April met her eyes. “You?” 

Sterling stopped walking and tugged April closer. “I was hoping I’d be invited to your study session.” She pouted; the puppy dog expression she knew April had a hard time resisting. “I thought since our Spanish exam is tomorrow-“ 

“Sterling…” 

“Please, babe,” Sterling begged, pushing her pout further. “I promise I’ll be on my best behavior.” She held her free hand out to the side. “Besides, Ezequiel and Hannah B will be there. What could I possibly do in front of them?” 

April raised an eyebrow. Her look was enough of an answer. 

Sterling rolled her eyes. “Okay, but I won’t.” She rocked their joined hands back and forth. “Come on, babe. Please?” 

April wasn’t exactly sure why she was drawing this out. She knew there was no way she could resist those puppy dog blue eyes. Her girlfriend’s pout alone caused her to internally melt into a pile of goo. She sighed and adjusted the strap against her shoulder. 

“Fine.” 

Sterling released an excited squeal and pulled her in for a tight hug. “You see. I will be on my best behavior.” She leaned back, giving April a serious look. “But you can’t wear any hoodies or sweatpants or-“ She swallowed then cleared her throat. “Work out shorts.” 

April laughed, the adoration for her girlfriend filled her body and lit her up inside. “What about jeans? Can I wear jeans?” 

Sterling twisted her mouth in thought and wrinkled her nose. “I guess jeans would be okay.” 

April huffed, shaking her head. She leaned in, resting her hand on Sterling’s heart. The rapid beat beneath her palm matched her own. “Be at my house in an hour.” 

Sterling nodded, maintaining eye contact. 

April stared back, mesmerized. It had been days since they’d seen each other outside of school, FaceTime, and texting. Selfies could only hold a person over for so long. It took everything in her power to break their eye contact. She honestly could stare into Sterling’s eyes for an eternity. Another in the long list of reasons why having her girlfriend over to study might be a bad idea. 

“Don’t be late,” April spoke softly as she placed a chaste kiss on her girlfriend’s waiting lips. 

Sterling smiled through their embrace. “Don’t be surprised if I’m early.” 

* * *

April was finding it exceedingly difficult to concentrate. 

She hated feeling like this. Her mind was anywhere but studying. She caught herself several times staring at the side of Sterling’s face. She studied the way Sterling chewed on her pen when she was deep in thought. The random peek of her tongue between her teeth when she moved to tapping her pen against her temple. The one thing she made Sterling promise not to do… she was doing. 

And it was driving her crazy. 

Sterling leaned back relaxing further into the couch and April followed her movement. She admired the flex in Sterling’s thigh when she stretched her long legs out and crossed her feet. Her pen found its way between her teeth again as she focused on the pages of her textbook. April wondered if it was strange to find someone so engrossed in schoolwork sexy. Some people might think so, but she honestly didn’t care. 

Seeing Sterling trying so hard to focus and behave was doing something to her. 

Ezequiel cleared his throat, loudly and April jumped from her haze. Her eyes darted in his direction. He smirked, his eyes shifting from April to Sterling then back again. He raised an eyebrow telling her that he knew what she was doing. He had seen it all and April blushed under the weight of his stare. 

She shook her head and waved him off. She shifted beside Sterling trying to find some comfort against the heat filling her body. Her movement caused Sterling to glance in her direction, offering her a cute little smile. 

“Oh, hey, Sterling.” 

Sterling turned her attention to Hannah B.. “Yes, Hannah B.?” 

Hannah B. cocked her head to the side. “Do you like peppermint?” 

April wasn’t sure what happened, but she suddenly found herself choking on air, unsure of how to stop herself. 

“Babe, are you okay?” Sterling asked, frantically scooting closer. She placed her arm around April’s shoulder. “Babe, what happened?” 

April continued to cough wildly, ignoring the soft sound of Ezequiel snickering off to her right. She shook her head and motioned toward her throat. “Something went down wrong,” she croaked, patting Sterling’s thigh. “I just need to get something to drink.” 

Sterling held her in place. “I can get it.” 

“No, no, honey.” April breathed in through her nose, finally able to steady herself. “It’s okay. I need a break anyway.” She touched Sterling’s cheek and smiled. “I’m fine. I’ll bring you something.” 

Ezequiel scrambled to stand. “I’ll come with you.” He tapped his throat. “I’m a little parched myself.” He motioned toward Hannah B. “Can I get you something?” 

“Water would be great,” Hannah B. responded, cheerfully. 

Sterling reluctantly released April allowing her to stand. Concern still weighed heavy on her features. “Are you sure you’re okay?” 

April melted at the look of concern her girlfriend was giving her. She reached out and touched her chin. “I promise I’m okay. I’ll bring you some water.” She brushed her thumb against Sterling’s chin then turned and walked toward the kitchen with Ezequiel not far behind.. 

Once she was inside the kitchen, April pressed her hands into the kitchen counter and lowered her head. Her eyes closed as she took in several steady breaths. What was happening to her made absolutely no sense. No, that was a lie. It made every bit sense when she realized every bit was made up of Sterling. Her lips, her hair. her… April groaned. She was sounding just like her girlfriend. 

“What was that?” Ezequiel teased, finally joining her in the kitchen. “I thought we were going to have to call 911.” 

April straightened turning to face her friend. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me,” she answered, moving her hand wildly as she spoke. “I gave Sterling this huge speech about how she has to behave, and we have to focus on studying and then-“ She exhaled exasperated. “Hannah B. mentions peppermint and my brain decides to flash images of some very inappropriate things involving Sterling and said… peppermint.” She rolled her eyes, dropping her head into her hands. “I’m losing it.” 

Ezequiel walked over to her, wrapping his arms around her shoulder comfortingly. “You’re not losing it. You’re just-“ he paused, pondering over what he was about to say. “-Needy.” 

April looked at him as if he had two heads. “Needy?” 

“Listen, I’m trying not to be crude, but you get what I’m trying to say.” He walked over the refrigerator and pulled the door open. “Maybe you should consider taking advantage of the fact that your mother isn’t going to be home until late tonight.” He peeked around the door, a smug smirk on his lips. “Let out some of that _midterm_ stress.” 

April crossed her arms against her chest, remaining silent. She couldn’t deny Ezequiel’s claim about what she was feeling. Things she should not be feeling during a study session. She blamed the fact that she and Sterling were a mere twenty-four hours away from taking the next step in their relationship. The closer the time came the more hyperaware she was of everything that was about to happen between them. 

And just how badly she wanted Sterling in that way. 

“Here,” Ezequiel said, offering her two bottles of water. He scrunched his nose shooting her a teasing look. “Maybe drink both so you can cool off.” 

April narrowed her eyes roughly taking the bottles from his hand. “Ha-ha,” she grumbled as she pushed herself away from the counter and they exited the kitchen… 

* * *

“I am so sorry we have to leave so early,” Ezequiel apologized as the group walked toward the front door. “I completely forgot that I offered to help my mom with some last minute holiday stuff and Hannah B. is my ride sooo…” He turned, shrugging his shoulder. “I guess you two will have to finish up without us.” 

April stared at Ezequiel; her expression neutral but she was fairly certain he could read what she was trying to convey. She knew his mother and there was no way her home wasn’t fully decorated for the holidays. In fact, April was sure their house was ready for Christmas the day after Thanksgiving. She was very aware of what Ezequiel was trying to pull and the wide grin on his face told her how right she was. 

“Don’t forget about the lake house on Friday. We’ll meet here after school and ride together,” April explained, trying to keep herself composed. 

“Can’t wait.” Ezequiel tossed her a wink as they said goodbye to the couple and walked out of the house. 

April closed the door behind them then turned to face Sterling. “Well, we should probably get back to studying.” 

She reached out and took Sterling’s hand to lead them back to the family room. She was met with resistance causing her steps to halt suddenly. Her attention turned back to Sterling and she gave her a curious look. 

“Can I get a kiss first?” Sterling asked, tugging her lightly. 

April stumbled forward. Her hand landed on Sterling’s shoulder, bracing herself before she fell into her. “Sterl, you promised,” she reminded as if her mind hadn’t been exploring different ways to do exactly what Sterling was asking her to do. 

Sterling adjusted her grip, resting her hands on April’s hips. She stepped closer pulling April forward as well. “I have been on my best behavior ever since I arrived.” She jutted out her bottom lip. “Just one kiss.” 

April tried to resist, but she knew it was futile. Sterling’s pouty face was her weakness, and her girlfriend knew it. Which is why she constantly played that particular card whenever she wanted something from April. Her resolve lasted two seconds before she found herself leaning upward to place a kiss on Sterling’s waiting lips. She broke the kiss just as quickly giving Sterling a closed mouth smile in response to the whine she released. 

“Study time,” April reminded as she took her hand again. She led Sterling toward the family room trying not to laugh at the way her girlfriend dragged her feet and complained about life being unfair. 

They went back to hitting the books, studying their Spanish flashcards and quizzing one another on different phrases. April tried to ignore how perfectly Sterling rolled her r’s and the adorable, disappointed face she would make when she mispronounced a word. It wasn’t easy to not be turned on by Sterling’s grasp of the language. 

To be honest, at this point, she would be turned on by Sterling crossing her eyes and making a goofy face. 

They’d gone back to their books, putting the flashcards off to the side. April tried to focus on the pages, but the words were staring to blend together. Sterling was so close. The light fragrance of her perfume mixed with her coconut scented shampoo was clouding April’s thoughts and distracting her in a way she could not longer deny. 

Without another thought, she reached out and removed Sterling’s book from her hand. The blonde looked at her confused, but April offered no explanation. She placed the book down on the coffee table followed by the pen Sterling allowed to be plucked from her fingers. She shut down the voices screaming at her to stop, to think this through. Those voices didn’t matter any longer. 

All that mattered was Sterling and this moment. 

April leaned in and touched her lips to Sterling’s and gave her the kiss that could—would—lead to so much more. She swallowed the surprised sound her girlfriend made when she deepened the kiss, moving closer, eager to feel as much as possible of Sterling at once. Her hands fell on Sterling’s shoulders, helping steady her as she climbed into her lap. April couldn’t convince herself to stop kissing Sterling for even one second, so she tried to let her hands convey her desire to Sterling while words weren’t available. 

April was driving Sterling crazy. The way she was kissing her breathless and touching her was too much. These last few days had been too much. But now she had April in her lap, and she thought she would come from the way April was pressing herself against her, like she wanted to devour her, her mouth demanding and nails lightly scratching along the side of her neck. 

She could practically hear the horny part of her brain—the one that’s been getting her into such a state over the last couple of weeks—screaming at the rest of her to shut up and just go for it. Oh my god, she was so ready for this. They’d waited so long for this. So that meant they could wait another minute or two. She did not want to rush into this and then regret it. “April, babe, slow down.” 

April didn’t respond. Or maybe she did. Maybe the way her tongue was busy running along Sterling’s neck, soothing the scratches left behind by her nails, was response enough. The way April’s hands were shaking against Sterling’s chest, sending tiny shockwaves of tingling pleasure through her body, was telling an entire story by themselves. 

“I thought we were planning on doing this tomorrow?” 

“You know what they say about plans,” April murmured against Sterling’s neck, the way her lips fluttered against the skin driving Sterling crazy. Crazier. Out of her mind. 

The last time she felt this out of control, she nearly pushed April into doing something she might’ve regretted. And with that thought taking her out of the moment, even if only for a fraction of a second, Sterling pushed herself up straighter, quickly wrapping April up in a reassuring hug, giving her a soft kiss before she could protest. 

“Shh, nothing’s wrong, babe,” Sterling said, giving April another kiss before letting her grip slip enough so she could move April back enough to look at her face. She took her apple-cheeked face into her hands and tried to make her look reflect all the love and admiration and fondness she felt for April. “I just think a moment would be good.” 

April nodded softly, visibly relaxing upon hearing her girlfriend’s words. She felt Sterling’s heart thumping against her hands, noticing the way her breath was making her chest rise rapidly. 

Sterling bit her lip, finding it hard to concentrate enough to find the right words when April kept brushing her thumbs across her nipples. “Not saying it’s not infuriatingly hot, but could you please stop doing that?” 

“What?” April looked genuinely confused, like she wasn’t aware of what she was doing and what it in turn was doing to Sterling. 

Sterling looked down, her eyes dropping towards her chest, hoping it would be enough for April to get the idea, because she didn’t know if she could articulate it using words without having the thoughts consume her and allow the horny part of her brain take over. 

“Oh, _oh_!,” April let out a small chuckle. “My hands have a mind of their own it seems. They want to touch every part of you at once.” 

Sterling regarded April’s bashful look before realizing she still hadn’t stopped. “I don’t want to ruin the mood,” she started, lifting April’s hands to her lips, kissing the tips of the fingers that had been teasing the mother-living-bejeezus out of her moments ago, “because I’m literally vibrating, like shaking isn’t enough to describe just how badly turned on I am right now and I need your hands to fulfill their destiny, but I want us to take a minute, a deep breath or two, and—” Sterling’s mind always went blank at the most inopportune time ‘—and…” 

“My mouth? Was that what you were thinking about?” April was grinning and Sterling wanted nothing more than to encourage her girlfriend to keep going. “My lips? My tongue?” 

Sterling cleared her throat but the voice that carried her words still came out thick and filled with need. “Uh, yeah, all of the above. Really, anything you want. Which is what I wanted to talk about.” 

“We’ve been over this, have we not?” 

“I suppose,” Sterling said with a small shrug. “But that was then, and this is now. I don’t want either of us to make assumptions.” 

“You know what they say.” 

“Uh, yeah, you...r ass… and me.” Sterling’s brain misfired and she made a strangled sound 

April kissed her softly and Sterling chased her lips. “Nuh uh. You wanted to talk instead of making out, so talk.” 

Sterling cursed herself, thinking that maybe the horny part of her brain had a point after all, because delaying this even by a minute or two felt like the cruelest form of torture. “I, uh, I want you. Like, physically. I want to be with you.” 

“Uh huh.” April tried to look at her ridiculous girlfriend and not jump her bones. Knowing that was only moments away made it easier to resist, especially since Sterling was busy being so good and so considerate. 

“Is that what you want?” 

The way Sterling was looking both shy and vulnerable but also expectant and hungry was insanely attractive. 

“Yes, Sterling, I want to have sex with you. Very much. Right here, right now.” April’s words sounded curt and matter-of-fact, but the way she was looking at Sterling while she said them betrayed the months of want that underpinned them. 

“Right here?” Sterling teased, knowing in her heart that in time, they would probably end up doing this all over the place—beds, couches, tables, straddling a chair, pressed up against a wall, on a deserted beach in the middle of nowhere. “On the living room couch?” 

“Uh, I didn’t even realize,” April laughed, and Sterling wanted that sound to last forever. They were both so turned on they could barely think straight and what was coming next had nearly consumed them both, filling them with nerves and anxiety. But now here they were, comfortably laughing. 

“Maybe your bed? It’s probably more fitting.” 

April wrapped her arms around Sterling’s neck and leaned closer, close enough that her breath tickled Sterling’s neck when she whispered, “Oh, I don’t know. I was ready to ravage you in the backseat of a car once, and this is infinitely more comfortable and less cramped.” 

Sterling closed her eyes, suddenly unable to catch her breath, shuddering with every syllable of honeyed promise that came from April’s mouth, and then let out the biggest whine when April crawled out of her lap and the wonderful, tingly sensation where their bodies had been touching slowly faded. She opened her eyes to April standing there with her arm outstretched, waiting for Sterling to take her hand. She leapt up and accepted the invitation without hesitation, happily walking behind her girlfriends on the stairs leading up to her bedroom. 

* * *

April snuggled closer to her naked girlfriend. She had a naked girl in her bed. Sterling Wesley was naked and holding her close, looking gorgeous and… sated. Eighteen months ago, this would’ve been a dream, and April still wasn’t sure it wasn’t one. She could probably ask Sterling to pinch her and she would. She’d been very receptive to requests while they were busy acquainting themselves with the world of wondrous new possibilities suddenly open to them. 

Sterling shifted, still lost in her own world, probably doing exactly what April was doing. So, April smiled and kissed her girlfriend's shoulder, unsure of why she’d been so nervous about doing something that felt so natural and right. Loving Sterling was easy and making love to her equally so. 

They’d been laughing as April pulled Sterling up the stairs, feeling free and easy now that the course for the rest of the night was set. They were still laughing when Sterling fell into bed and April practically pounced on her, covering her face with kisses. She’d expected things to move faster now that they were about to be intimate, so the lengthy make-out session that followed surprised her, but it had ended up with them mostly naked and panting in the most delicious ways. 

The way Sterling reacted to the slightest touch would never not be a marvel to behold, her body so responsive to—and appreciative of—April’s clumsy initial touches. April admitted to herself that some of that might have to do with amount of massively pent-up desire and a week of very, very mean teasing 

Sterling climaxed so quickly that the moment she regained any control of herself, she covered her face with her hands and told April she was sorry, so sorry for ruining everything. She’d pulled Sterling hands down and kissed her deeply, telling her how gorgeous she looked when lost in ecstasy. April got to see that a couple of more times before they ended up where they now lay, and she felt blessed. 

It’d been… everything. She couldn’t think of any other way to describe it. She didn’t feel like a different person and her love for Sterling hadn’t changed, but there was a new sensation of closeness and intimacy, of knowing Sterling like she hadn’t before. The same way she’d felt seen when Sterling had gasped and admired her, all of her, when she finally shed the last piece of clothing. 

There was finally nothing left between them. They were just two people who loved one another and expressed that love in every possible way. It was wonderful. 

Sterling rolled over on her side and smiled at April. “Hey, lover.” 

The way she was looking at April made her blush. “Don’t say that. It sounds... sleazy.” 

“Fine, babe, I’ll stick to babe,” she laughed and nuzzled closer. “How are you feeling?” 

“I’m... It was...” April swallowed, suddenly feeling tongue-tied. Summing up what had happened using words seemed impossible. Whatever she said would be lacking. “I’m wonderful. Tonight was... everything. 

Sterling bit her lip and nodded. “Same. I wish I didn’t have to leave.” 

“Me too, but maybe tomorrow?” 

“Arrogant much? You’re counting on another roll in the hay the next time we’re together? Just because that was the plan... “ Sterling quoted April back to herself. “You know what they say about plans.” 

“I, uh, I--” 

Sterling laughed and kissed April’s cute nose. “The way your ears turned bright red. It was so cute. You’re so cute.” 

“I was just talking about sleeping together.” April gave Sterling a nudge. “As in sharing a bed and waking up together.” 

“That sounds wonderful too.“ Sterling smiled and pulled April closer, shivering now that they were just two naked people laying on top of a bed. “If you don’t grab me a blanket, I’m breaking up with you.” 

April looked over at her wonderful, amazing girlfriend and gave her a half-smirk. “Honey, after tonight, we both know that isn’t happening.”


	18. "Nightmare IS a Christmas Movie"

Sterling didn’t think she’d stopped smiling since she left April’s last night. She couldn’t be sure, because somewhere in the middle of the night she had actually calmed down enough to sleep for a while, and there was a slight possibility that she was not a sleep smiler.

She wouldn’t count on it though.

The way she was smiling had been a great source of amusement to Blair, who had picked up the marked improvement of her mood pretty much immediately once she walked through the door. Thankfully their mom had unwittingly run interference for her by choosing that moment to confront Blair about her weird behavior, and Sterling pounced on the opportunity to sneak away and get her door barricaded before Blair brought out the big guns.

Safely under the covers still, she looked over at the clock and sighed; being awake before 5AM during Midterm Madness was never part of the plan, but neither was last night, and yet it was all so, so, so worth it. April was worth it. April was worth everything and more still.

The time they got to spend cuddling under the blanket—far too brief before she had to leave—was one of her favorite things about last night. Not that she was lacking in favorites. April had been so sweet and understanding when her frustration led to an awkward moment when the briefest touches brought by April’s fingers on not really that inappropriate places, but definitely moving in that direction, had sent her over the edge. It wasn’t the only awkward moment, just the biggest one, but everytime anything happened, they laughed and kissed and talked and moved on.

Her favorite moment—one she definitely told April about when they were all afterglowy and snuggling—came when she was experiencing another first, and in her eagerness pushed a button too intently, making April pull away. She had her heart in her throat then but April had pulled her back up, held her close and talked until they were laughing over how silly they had been, expecting perfection. April pushed her back down and guided her to the right places and the right touches, and when her girlfriend responded to Sterling’s actions by changing her tone of voice to one that was telling, even ordering and demanding, an awkward moment transformed into the hottest thing she had ever experienced.

She touched her fingers to her lips, a dopey grin forming when she realized she could still taste April on them.

April was right. Last night was everything. It was sweet, hot, loving, and hot. Did she mention how hot it was? Sterling felt so happy she could burst. And she didn’t care if her permanent smile made her look like she’d been exposed to Joker Venom. Being this happy was worth it.

She got out of bed and tip-toed across to enter Blair’s bedroom. Her twin was fast asleep, tangled up in her covers like a pretzel.

She gave Blair’s bed a soft kick. Then a harder one. When Blair refused to be roused, she grabbed the comforter and gave it a shake, then a yank, relieved when Blair seemed to emerge from her coma before she was pulled out of bed completely, sent tumbling to the floor.. “Oh good, you’re awake. I didn’t want to wake you this early.”

“Sterl? What?”

“Couldn’t sleep. Need to talk.”

Blair looked at the clock, glaring at her twin when she saw it was just after 5AM. “At least I only robbed you of seven minutes of sleep.”

“I’m sorry! But it couldn’t wait, really.”

“Oh, for the love of the lord, get over yourself,” she groaned, staring at the ceiling. “You had sex. It’s no biggie.”

“What?”

“You and Stevens. I wouldn’t be surprised if there was a betting pool going at school.” Blair laughed. “You are _ridiculously_ unsubtle”

“Stop it. Not you too. It’s bad enough when April and mom do it,” Sterling said and looked away from Blair when she remembered some of the times when April had called her that last night.

“Were I a betting woman, I would’ve put down my life savings on the 18th. Just an educated guess.” Blair barrelled on, ignoring Sterling's increasing blinkiness. “Good thing I feel betting is morally wrong and spilling the tea regarding anyone’s sex life just repugnant, or you would’ve had to give up on your grand plans so mom and dad could afford the tuition at UCLA when I lost it all.”

“I thought you were getting a scholarship?”

“I am. I think, I mean. I’m pretty sure. Probably. Why else would they scout me if they weren’t willing to pay top dollars for top talent?” Blair rolled over and faced Sterling, resting on one elbow. “That is _not_ the topic at hand. We can talk about _that_ when it’s not _five in the freaking morning._ ”

Sterling nodded, not sure what she actually wanted to say.

“Did she at least, you know...” Blair wiggled her tongue and waggled her eyebrows.

Sterling was sure she did not want to talk about that, but her reaction betrayed her.

“Case closed. She’s a murderer y’all. April Stevens, slayer of innocence, bringer of orgasms, exorciser of the Ghost of Peanut Butter Lumberjack.

“Blair, please don’t be crude. Last night was… special.” Sterling considered. “It was everything.”

“Everything?” Blair’s eyebrows hit the ceiling. “Does that mean you finally cracked the seal on the vibrator I got you?”

“Blair Wesley!”

“Your scolding mom voice is not going to get you anywhere.”

Sterling narrowed her eyes. “Of course we didn’t use that… that thing. It was our first time together. I wanted it to be all about us, the two of us, together.”

“Does that mean you considered it? It does, doesn’t it?” Blair grinned.

“Maybe I—”

“Don’t matter. Your reasoning doesn’t matter. I know you would be willing to do whatever it takes to keep Little Miss Perfect happy.” Blair scooted over the side of the bed, her head dangling dangerously close to the floor. She reached under the bed and pulled something out from under it. “That’s why I got you this. Tell April she can thank me later.”

Sterling cautiously took the box. It was surprisingly big and heavy. “Blair—what? What is this?”

"It's my couples gift. Do not, I repeat, do not open around any parental units. Now get out of my room so I can sleep. "

Stunned, Sterling walked back to her own room, holding the box at arm’s length.

* * *

“Sterling, stop.” 

The sound of April’s laughter, and half hearted order, filled the kitchen. All she wanted to do was get their movie snacks ready. They’d already been in the kitchen for far longer than they should have and Sterling trapping her against the kitchen island was not helping them move any faster. The weight of Sterling on her back, arms wrapped tightly around her waist, made her slump forward and she was dangerously close to falling forward into the tray of crackers and cheeses. 

“I can’t help it. You’re just so kissable. Like, all over.” 

April attempted to shrug Sterling off of her shoulder several times. Admittedly, the attempts were feeble at best, but she still tried. Her eyes closed involuntarily as she enjoyed the feel of Sterling trailing wet, open mouth kisses against her skin. She breathed reaching back to tangle soft blonde locks between her fingers. Sterling’s teeth grazed her skin and April jumped, tightening her grasp on Sterling. 

She swallowed thickly doing everything in her power to pull herself from her Sterling induced haze. “Sterl, seriously, you’ve got to stop…” 

“Yes, please, for the love of God! Stop!” 

“Oh My God! I think I’m blind.” 

“Aw, stop guys, it’s cute. Leave them alone.” 

Sterling jumped back, detaching her lips from April’s neck. April cleared her throat and raised her hand to her face, trying to calm the burning heat on her cheeks. She raised her attention to their intruders rolling her eyes at their antics. Blair had her hand over her eyes, moving her hand around as she searched blindly for Lord knows what. Ezequiel made a face, humming as he took a few steps closer to the kitchen island. Hannah B. clasped her hands together looking at the couple adoringly. 

Blair lowered her hand smirking at the dirty look she received from her sister. She stepped closer to the kitchen island, stealing a chip from the bowl on the counter. “We were wondering what was taking you two so long.” 

April wiped her hands together and stepped away from the counter. “If you were just patient and waited another five minutes-“ 

“If we waited another five minutes who knows what we would have walked in on,” Blair interrupted, grabbing another chip. “I feel like we stopped an accidental pregnancy.” 

“Blair!” the couple scolded, blushing simultaneously. 

Blair grinned mischievously behind a mouth full of chips as Ezequiel chuckled beside her. 

April threw up her hands and turned halfway to look at Sterling. “Feel free to lock your sister in the upstairs bathroom,” she suggested as she lightly touched her shoulder and walked over the refrigerator. 

“So what movie are we watching tonight anyway?” Hannah B asked, scanning the table full of snacks. 

Sterling glanced at Hannah B. and smiled. Whether Hannah B. realized it or not, her curving the conversation was welcomed. She knew her sister’s teasing was going to be amplified after what she shared with her. Part of her hoped Blair would just give them one night of no torment, but who was she kidding? The information she gave her twin at five this morning was too much for her to resist. 

“We should totally watch Nightmare Before Christmas,” Ezequiel suggested, taking another snack. 

“I told you that movie creeps me out, Ezequiel,” Hannah B. reminded as she walked over to April and assisted her with the drinks. She smiled when April quietly thanked her then returned to the counter, handing everyone a bottle. “Oogie Boogie is the worst.” 

“Aww, Hannah B.,” Blair cooed, giving her a sympathetic pout. “If it will help you feel better, I’ll hold your hand when he comes on.” 

Ezequiel looked from one girl to the next. “Am I being a fifth wheel?” he asked, thrusting his thumb over his shoulder. “Because I can totally leave you ladies alone on your little double date.” 

Blair nudged him roughly, shooting him a side eyed glare. Hannah B. waved him off as she opened her bottle and took a sip. 

“Are we sure we want to watch Nightmare?” Blair questioned, bringing her own bottle to her lips. “Isn’t that more of a Halloween movie?” 

Ezequiel scoffed and scrunched his nose. “Uh, no, it’s a Christmas movie.” 

Blair mirrored his expression. “Are you nuts? Like Hannah B. said, it’s creepy.” She turned so she was fully facing Ezequiel. “What Christmas movie have you ever watched that’s creepy?” 

“A Nightmare before Christmas,” he answered quickly, dropping an imaginary mic. 

“Okay, hang on-“ 

There was barely any time for anyone to intervene before Blair and Ezequiel began bickering. It wasn’t long before Hannah B. chimed in and suggested they watch It’s A Wonderful Life, to which Blair responded that everyone had already done enough crying this holiday season. The argument began to escalate, and even though it was playful, it was loud enough to cause April to intervene. 

“Hey, why don't we just go watch it and not stand in the middle of the kitchen arguing about it?" April suggested, giving everyone in the room a pointed stare. She motioned toward the counter filled with various movie snacks. “And if you all could help carry some of this, that would be _amazing_.” 

Sterling attention shifted toward April noticing the serious expression on her face. A wave of admiration washed over her at the sight of her girlfriend in full leadership mode. April giving direction was extremely hot. Sterling scratched anxiously at the back of her neck as she tried to push thoughts of April being bossy in other ways flooded her mind. She needed to keep her thoughts under control considering other parts of her had already toed a line. 

Blair opened her mouth obviously wanting to say something snarky but stopped when Ezequiel tapped her arm. “No, no, she’s bitey. Did you not hear about what happened before the Spanish exam?" 

"No, what?" 

"Franklin was teasing the love birds about their behavior. He said something about how the way they were flirting by rolling their r's at each other being cute. April made him cry. He was still crying when he handed in his answers. Later there were whispers about his parents suing Willingham for not stopping the bullying that, and I quote, 'ruined their son's chance of getting into a half-way decent college'" 

"Wow. You'd think that she'd be nicer now." 

Ezequiel just looked at her and nodded. He wiggled his fingers signaling toward the food. “Just grab a tray and go.” 

Blair narrowed her eyes and looked at Sterling. When she saw the pleading look on her sister’s face, she sighed and picked up a tray. She locked eyes with Ezequiel once again. “This debate isn’t over.” 

“Oh, girl, I don’t give up that easily,” he noted, picking up two bowls of chips. 

Once they were gone, Sterling helped April gather the rest of the snacks. She watched as her girlfriend balanced the remaining goodies. “"I know yesterday changed our plans, but gosh-“ She stepped closer, positioning herself next to April. “You are so hot when you're bitey." 

April shifted her gaze upward to meet Sterling’s. A half smile formed on her lips as she stepped around Sterling, maintaining their eye contact. April took a step even closer and placed herself inches away from Sterling. She tilted her head chin upward, hovering close to her lips smiling when Sterling’s mouth parted in response. 

“Which form of bitey are you talking about?” April asked, her tone a low and seductive. 

Sterling swallowed hard before an incoherent, strangled sound escaped her throat. 

April chuckled, quietly. Her eyes shifted toward the last bowl on the countertop. “Be an angel and grab that for me.” She pushed herself closer giving Sterling’s lips a quick peck. She locked eyes with her again. “I’ll meet you in the theater room. We can sit behind them.” She winked at Sterling then walked toward the door. 

Sterling’s jaw dropped dumbfounded as her gaze followed her girlfriend out of the room… 

* * *

The theater room was definitely impressive. 

There were four rows of cushioned reclining seats in the center of the room. Blair sat between Hannah B. and Ezequiel in the front row center leaving the back row for April and Sterling. Sterling wanted to skip an entire row leaving enough space between them and their framily, but April declined her request. She made a point of how Blair was already on high alert so putting that much distance between them would definitely result in some unwanted teasing. 

Sterling settled into the recliner besides April and covered them both with a blanket April had brought from upstairs. April shifted, sitting sideways and cuddled close to Sterling, resting her head against her chest. As the lights went dim, Sterling turned her head enough to place a soft kiss against April’s forehead. 

She smiled at the contact, adjusting her body so she could rest her arm around Sterling’s midsection. The movie began to play, and the narrator’s voice echoed through the room. April would be lying if she said she had any interest in the movie. All she could focus on was how good Sterling smelled. How comfortable she felt wrapped up in Sterling’s embrace. 

And how the slow caress of Sterling’s fingertips trailing up and down her arm was driving April slowly into madness. 

“Try and keep it PG back there,” Blair quipped, over her shoulder. “Some of us are trying to watch a movie.” 

Sterling narrowed her eyes, kicking the back of her sister’s chair causing Blair to laugh sarcastically. 

As much as April would have loved to chastise Blair for her remark, she couldn’t deny that her thoughts at that very moment weren’t exactly very PG. Every memory from their night together came flooding back drowning out the current sounds of the movie. All she could think about was Sterling’s lips against her skin. The comforting way she guided her to what she needed and where she needed it. The way her body responded to April’s touch like it was the only thing keeping her grounded. 

“April?” 

Sterling’s soft whispered pulled her from her thoughts. She shifted her gaze upward, meeting her girlfriend’s questioning expression. “What?” she responded, keeping her voice at a movie appropriate whisper. 

Sterling flashed a small smile. Her blue eyes shifted downward and April followed the place her gaze was guiding her to. She took in quiet breath and a blush instantly warmed her cheeks when she noticed her hand had slipped underneath Sterling’s t-shirt, resting on the warm skin of her bare stomach. 

“I mean, I don’t mind but-“ 

April kept her hand in place as she met Sterling’s eyes again. “We should probably wait till we’re alone though,” she finished, unconsciously scrapping her short nails across Sterling’s bare skin. 

Sterling shuddered, taking in a deep breath. “Uh, yeah, probably.” 

April inched up, kissing the underside of Sterling’s jaw. “Okay, I’ll stop.” 

She gently removed her hand from underneath Sterling’s shirt. She smoothed out the material before settling back into her previous position resting her hand safely on top of Sterling’s stomach. 

“You don’t _have_ to stop,” Sterling whispered, her tone strained. 

“No, you’re right. We should wait until we’re alone.” April cuddled impossibly closer. “By the way, our room is furthest from the guest rooms so-“ She turned her head slightly placing a small kiss on Sterling’s shoulder. “We’ll be pretty far from any Blair interruptions or comments about how she can hear you through the walls.” 

Sterling balked, feeling the heat rise up her neck and into her cheeks. “I’m not that loud.” 

April shifted again giving Sterling an incredulous look. “Honey…” 

Sterling returned her look. “You’re not so quiet yourself, you know?” 

“Are you complaining?” 

“Are you?” 

April lips parted, and she lightly bit down on the corner of her lip to suppress her smirk. Her eyes slowly drifted downward, taking in the curve of Sterling’s smile and the way her lip gloss made them even more irresistible. Without another thought, she leaned in and kissed Sterling, pouring everything she was feeling into their embrace. On instinct her body shifted upward, and it was taking every ounce of willpower she had not to crawl into Sterling’s lap. 

“See! A Nightmare Before Christmas _is_ a Christmas movie!” 

Ezequiel’s proclamation caused them to jump apart and Sterling whined at the loss of contact. April inwardly whined as well brushing her fingertips against her girlfriend’s chin apologetically. 

“Dude, the evil kids were recruited to _kidnap_ Santa Claus! That’s Halloween shit!” Blair responded, tossing a handful of popcorn at him 

“Girl, if you don’t quit playing!” 

“Guys, come on! We’re trying to watch a movie,” Hannah B. reminded, leaning in toward Blair. “You will hold my hand when Oogie Boogie comes shows up, right?” 

“I got you, Hannah B.” 

April and Sterling exchanged a glace and chuckled quietly at their friends' antics. April sighed, shrugging her shoulder and Sterling knew that their tiny touching session was about to come to an end. They shared another small kiss before settling back into one another and watching the movie… 

* * *

April sat on the edge of the bed in a room she would never see again once the framily got into the car tomorrow and drove away. Looking around, she could only see her past self in how the room was decorated; it felt alien to her. Her last memory from the lake house would indeed be happy, but she couldn’t bring herself to feeling sad it would soon be firmly in the past.

The happiness she found tonight, she would carry with her into the future, and nothing about it would have to do with the lake house. It was all about the people: her friends, Ezequiel and Hannah B. And Blair. She mentally kicked herself because excluding Blair was a reflex she wanted to grow out of.

Then there was Sterling.

She couldn’t stop her leg from bouncing while she waited for her girlfriend to finish getting ready for bed. The same bed in which she was going to sleep too. The same bed she had meant for their first time. Now it was going to be their second time, because there was no way she was going to be able to sleep next to Sterling without first making sure she came apart under her fingers.

Not after the way this day had developed. And the way kissing Sterling while completely ignoring the movies playing had made her feel.

Sitting here, waiting, the anticipation was growing, and she felt unsure if she’d made the right choice when she picked her outfit for the night. Because it was an outfit more than anything else. She had looked through cute PJs with shorts that flattered her legs, still cute but also somewhat sexy underwear that she felt certain would find approval with Sterling. But in the end, she decided to play it safe.

She wasn’t nervous or anxious anymore. So why her leg wouldn’t stop bouncing was beyond her.

When the door opened and Sterling stepped through, her leg stopped. In fact, so did most of her other faculties. 

Sterling was wearing a cute black camisole set with sheer parts that offered April a tantalizing glimpse of the creamy skin underneath. As luck would have it, the camisole was split down the front and April couldn’t wait to slide her hands underneath the flimsy fabric and all over Sterling’s smooth stomach, and unlike in the theater room, she wouldn’t have to still her hands; here in the privacy of their own room, she could push the fabric aside and place soft kisses all over every inch of skin she could expose.

The way Sterling cleared her throat made April tear her eyes away from their current obsession with capturing every wonderful detail of how Sterling looked standing there in front of her. But only for a moment.

"Since yesterday just kinda happened, I didn't get a chance to look my best for you, but this was always what I was planning on." Sterling looked over at April shyly, not able to capture her eyes to truly judge her reaction. "Is it too much? It's too much, isn't it?"

April looked up again, and this time she held Sterling’s gaze, shaking her head. “Absolutely not. You look stunning. Cute, yet still sexy. Showing just enough to… some might say you were guilty of teasing your girlfriend.”

“So you like it?” Sterling chewed nervously on her lower lip.

April stood up, stepping closer to Sterling so she could toy with the fringe of the camisole, tugging at it softly. “Doesn’t begin to describe it. Or do it justice. Do you justice. You’re gorgeous, Sterl.”

Sterling beamed happily until April's hands slipped across her stomach and settled on her sides, leaving her tingly. She dropped her head and looked at April’s hands slowly continuing their exploration across her skin when she got a glimpse of what her girlfriend was wearing.

“And.. this… holy crap.” Sterling took in the way April was dressed. Or more accurately, wasn’t. Where Sterling had spent half a day Googling for the cute things to wear, trying not to go overboard for their first time, April had gone straight for the jugular. 

She was wearing the loose tank top Sterling so adored, and she was pretty sure the cute boy shorts rounded out the ensemble. But the way the tank was cut showed off nothing but smooth skin down the sides of April’s body, revealing that she was not wearing a bra, sports or otherwise. If she looked closer, Sterling could definitely see the soft swell of her girlfriend’s breasts, just ready for her to reach out and touch. “April, babe, don’t you dare call me a tease when you know what this does to me. I brought a Glock 19 to a fight being conducted with nuclear bombs.

“You like?”

“Babe, I drool.”

April’s smirk appeared like clockwork, but Sterling didn’t mind. April wasn’t arrogant. She was just an expert at turning her girlfriend into a puddle of need. 

“Then things went according to plan,” April said, slowly raking her fingernails towards Sterling’s back.

“This was your plan all along?” Sterling shivered with delight as April traced a fingertip along her spine. “Back in the movie room you seemed halfway to dragging me out the door.”

"What did you think I was planning, Sterling? For us to sneak off during the movie like some horny teenagers?"

"We ARE horny teens. And you did mention sneaking. There was going to be sneaking. I prepared for it. That’s why I’m wearing black, to hide in the shadows."

April blushed, sneaking like that sounded preposterous to her now. “Yes, I might’ve said that until I remembered that the guest rooms are on the other side of the house. I asked mom to make sure they were ready for us.”

“You’re always thinking ahead. I love that about you. I love you.”

“She even prepared one for you.”

“Good thing she’s not around to do a room check at lights out, or you’d have to wait for that second roll in the hay that I know you so desperately want,” Sterling laughed and let her fingers wander up and down April’s exposed sides.

She watched as April’s eyes grew dark, and when April picked her up and threw her on the bed, she yelped and kept laughing.

When April climbed into bed with her, and growled, “No, tonight I want more,” Sterling stopped laughing and began shaking.

* * *

“That feels really good.” 

Sterling smiled as she continued to trace tiny patterns along April’s back. There weren’t any specific drawings or shapes, just the mapping of her girlfriend’s skin underneath her fingertips after the second most amazing night of her life. Her own body felt electric, like every nerve ending under her skin was alive and refusing to settle down. 

It was seriously the most wonderful feeling in the world. 

“Everything tonight felt really good,” Sterling whispered and leaned in to kiss the sharp tips of April’s shoulder blades, slowing her fingers for just a second as she let her lips do the talking. 

“Not too much then?” 

Sterling rested her forehead against the base of April’s neck. “This is going to be a thing with us, isn’t it? Always being afraid of pushing too hard.” She could feel the soft shake of April’s head when she started speaking. 

“Not always, Sterl. We’re still young and learning.” 

“Learning fast, by the look of things. And the... thing of things,” Sterling kissed her way up April’s neck until she felt honey brown hair tickling against her face. She resumed her aimless drawing and snuggled closer. 

“Getting sleepy, honey?” 

“Mmhmm. Can you blame me?” 

April rolled onto her side and reached back to find Sterling’s arm and move it around her, in a soft embrace. “This only works if I’m the small spoon.” 

“Mmhmm,” Sterling murmured, slowly drifting off, feeling so happy and safe with April next to her. 

“Still think that falling asleep together sounds wonderful?” She pressed back against Sterling, settling into for the night. 

“Mmhmm. The wonderfullest.” 

April took Sterling’s hand in hers and gave it a quick kiss before cradling it close to her heart.


	19. "Santa threw up in here.."

Ezequiel nodded at Blair when she walked into the lake house kitchen. “Evil Twin.”

She grunted in response, struggling to keep her eyes open enough to avoid bumping into things as she moved towards the source of the smell of coffee that filled the kitchen.

“No witty comeback? Girl, you really aren’t a morning person at all.”

“Ugh. Delayed sugar crash.”

“You didn’t have to eat an entire pack of Twizzlers just to prove their ‘superiority over the rubbery mediocrity that is Red Vines’,” he said, mocking how stupidly intense their debate last night got. 

“Normally Sterling keeps me in check. I tell her I hate her for it,” Blair tried to clear her foggy mind, “but I think she might have a point.”

“I think she had other things on her mind yesterday.”

“No shit, Black Sherlock.”

“It’s not a good comeback, but you’re getting there.”

Blair snarled. "I'll have you know my comebacks are legendary."

"The only thing legendary about them is that like other stuff of legend, I question the veracity of the stories surrounding them." Ezequiel fixed his eyes on the brown-haired Wesley. "Stories you're the only one to tell, by the way."

Blair huffed. “A little self-promotion has never hurt.”

“How about outright lies? Dirty, rotten lies.”

“How about coffee? Hot, life-giving coffee.”

“Help yourself.” Ezequiel cradled his cup between his hands and took a big sip. “I can see about borrowing a seeing-eye dog to help you find your way.”

“I can navigate by smell. It’s just my eyes that have trouble staying open. I still have a working nose.”

“In the same way you’d be able to navigate a mine-field by hearing?”

“What?” Blair cursed when she stubbed her toe on the kitchen island she had completely failed to notice.

“Thank you for proving my point.”

Blair circumvented the hateful piece of furniture, hopping around on one foot, until she reached the counter that held the coffee maker. “Cups?”

“Right above you.”

Blair emptied the remains of the pot into the huge mug she grabbed from the cabinet. The brown liquid that spilled out barely coated the bottom. “Is this all that’s left?”

“Early bird and all that.”

“It is early.”

“Maybe for you. Hannah B. and I have been up for an hour. That’s why all the coffee is gone.”

“I’m not the last one down for breakfast at least.”

“April and your sister probably have other reasons for not being out of bed just yet.”

“After that I’m sure a night of what probably was strenuous physical activity, I don’t fault them for sleeping in,” Blair snickered.

“Oh, girl, I didn’t mean to imply they’re still asleep.”

She shuddered. “Please don’t say that. Bad enough I have to watch them paw at each other constantly, I did not need to consider that they might be busy scissoring as we speak.”

“What’s with you and that term?” Ezequiel leaned back and took another sip. “Why are you so obsessed with scissoring? Curious to try it out for yourself?”

“What?!” Blair spluttered, but there was not enough coffee for her to do a proper spit-take. “No! It’s just to tease Sterling. She’s so easy. And scissoring seemed specific enough to get her blushing without being, you know, vulgar.”

Ezequiel’s brow quirked, and he smiled sweetly. “Because I’m sure April has better things she wants to do with Sterling once they move past the basics.”

“You think they’re still following the Lesbian Sex 101 corriculum?”

“I would suspect so. It’s only their second night together.”

“Second?”

Ezequiel rested his elbows on the counter top and leaned closer, like he was about to spill everybody’s tea. “Maybe I gave them a little nudge on Thursday. Made sure they had both time and privacy.”

“Ha! I knew Sterling was being very smiley when she got home from study group.” Blair kept the fact that Sterling had already confided in her, like a good sister should, from Ezequiel. “You sly little enabler, you.”

“Only doing what a good friend would do for any friend in need.”

“And by ‘in need’ you mean horny.”

“God, yes. Have you seen them lately? I don’t know exactly what happened, but even April was being blatant. And you _know_ she’s the most in control… lesbian I know. She’s never blatant.”

Blair nodded. “Sterling’s been ready since, oh, probably five hours after they got back together. She was actually waiting for April. It was sickeningly sweet to see her take one for the team.”

“Like she’s taking one right now, you mean.”

“Eww, dammit, stop putting ungodly images in my head. I can accept them having sex, as long as I don’t have confront that particular fact directly.”

“I can’t wait for the first time you walk in on them. The howl of anguish is gonna echo across the globe.”

Blair shook with disgust. “I’ve done that enough times already. Even with the clothes being still on, I jump back in shock every time.”

“Like last night, you mean.”

“Yeah, seriously, did they really think we were unaware of their plans for continued sexual exploits?”

That’s when Hannah B. entered the kitchen—holding what looked like a full cup of coffee that made Blair consider a quick smash and grab—and the conversation: “April and Sterling had sex? Aww, I’m so happy for them. I love them together. They’re so good for each other. Don’t you agree?“ Her stare flickered between the two of them, neither Blair nor Ezequiel ready to agree with her, so she gave Ezequiel her best glare.

He stared back at Hannah B. before shrugging his shoulders. “You know I do. I told her exactly that. You know, you were there.”

“Blair?” Hannah B. faced Blair, once again attempting a glare, but still looking more like she was staring adoringly. “C’mon, Blair, I know you love Sterling being happy again.”

“That’s not fair,” Blair whined. “Of course I want her to be happy. But that’s April. And my sister. Doing god knows what toget—”

“Not scissoring,” Ezequiel pointed out.

Blair resisted throwing the mug at his smug face. “Fine, of course I’m happy for them. I never thought I’d say this, but Stevens—” she corrected herself “—April is a real sweetheart.”

The other members of the Holy Trinity gasped as once before laughing.

“Don’t you dare tell her that I said that. I need to maintain some sort of leverage, or the two of them will be unbearable,” she joined the laughter, “even when I’m around.”

“We won’t,” Ezequiel promised. “You can keep giving April the verbal Wesley check. I know that’s how you express your affection. 

“Lies, lies, and more lies,” Blair said, grinning widely.

“And besides, I know if you get completely out of line… my girl still knows how to cut a fool.”

* * *

They’d slept the way they fell asleep and April woke up with Sterling’s soft warm body against her. It was heaven. She rolled over, Sterling’s arms still around her, and studied Sterling’s soft sleeping face, the widest smile imaginable on her own. 

She carefully pulled an arm free and reached up to brush Sterling’s cheek with her fingertips. Her instinct was to lean in and give her girlfriend a soft kiss good morning, but she didn’t want to disturb this sleeping angel. 

Brushing the hair from Sterling’s forehead, she thought she saw a small twitch come across her lips, like she was trying to hold back a smile. April bopped her nose softly and laughed when Sterling wrinkled her nose.

“You got me. I’m awake.”

April leaned in and kissed her girlfriend, not nearly as soft as she had planned to, especially not when Sterling wrapped her arms tighter, pulling her closer. “Morning, honey. Slept well?”

“Best night’s sleep ever. Like, for real.”

April nodded and tangled her legs between Sterling’s. “Me too. This was wonderful.”

“Wonderfullest,” Sterling corrected her with a soft, sparkling laugh.

“Silliest,” April said, kissing the tip of her girlfriend’s nose,”most ridiculous—”

Sterling started protesting, but April quickly shut her up with another kiss.

“—most wonderful girlfriend I could ever hope for.”

Sterling pouted adorably, her eyes filled with mirth. “Not wonderfullest?”

“Yes, that’s what I said, but properly. I can be in love with you and still adhere to proper grammar.”

“And I’m the ridiculous one.”

“You are.”

Sterling smiled and ran her hands up April’s bare back until she could play with the soft hair at the base of her girlfriend’s neck. “Was it everything you hoped for?”

April blushed and started averting her eyes until she heard Sterling’s chuckle.

“Waking up like this, I mean. Falling asleep together and waking up together.”

April nodded. “Better. Looking at a photo of you turned out to be a poor substitute. Nothing can ever live up to the real thing.

“I can’t wait until this is every day.”

“Me neither. Soon. Real soon,” April kissed Sterling again, deeper this time. Her hands began to roam over Sterling’s soft skin. She laughed to herself when she brushed over one of the sensitive spots she discovered last night and Sterling gave off a frustrated whine.

“April, we can’t. Everybody is probably awake by now.”

She let her hands travel further down and grinned when she felt Sterling respond. “I know. I don’t care. I’m not wasting any more time.”

* * *

April carried the last set of bags out to the car herself and tossed them in the back. Inside, her framily was happily chatting away and laughing. She only had herself to blame from the time pressure she found herself under, but it was hard to resist Sterling and the delightful sounds she produced when so prompted, so yeah, she was partly to blame as well.

She fired off a quick group text telling everybody to get going, not wanting to waste another minute by entering the lake house and herding them outside. She tapped her feet impatiently, and once at least a minute had gone by, she sent a follow-up, telling them she was leaving in 60 seconds, with or without them.

Blair’s profanity-filled screed could probably be heard in the next county over, but at least it informed April that her message had been received, read, and understood. She didn’t need a timer to know that they met her deadline.

“Seriously Steven, what the rush?” Blair looked ready to throw down.

“I just want to get home in time.”

“In time for what, the party doesn’t start for hours and hours. You’ll be just sitting around waiting.”

“Uh, I want to watch The Mandalorian before the party. And with that show you never know if the episode is going to be 25 minutes or an hour.”

“You… you… “ Blair felt like she was having an aneurysm. “You threatened to leave us here so you could watch some stupid TV show?”

“Don’t say that. It’s probably the best Star Wars has been since the original trilogy.”

“You’re such a nerd. It will never stop being amazing to me.” Blair grinned.

Sterling stepped up to April and wrapped her arms around her girlfriend, acting like a Blair-proof vest. “Am I a nerd too, Blair? It’s simply a good show.”

Blair rolled her eyes.

April gave Sterling a soft squeeze and a quick kiss. “I’m glad you agree with me.”

“I do, but maybe you were a bit harsh?” Sterling caressed April’s cheek lovingly. “Just a bit.”

“You _know_ it’s the season finale. Everything is going to happen in this episode.” April leaned in and whispered so only Sterling could hear her. “And if I end up getting spoiled because of all this dragging of feet, I might not be in such a generous mood later. I might be quite… selfish.”

Sterling swallowed and let go off April, gesturing wildly at the rest of the gang. “You heard her… C’mon, let’s go! Get in the car already. Hustle, folks!”

April closed the driver side door, turned the ignition and stepped on the gas pedal, driving away from the lake house like she was possessed by Blair.

* * *

April stood in front of her mirror checking her appearance. She wrinkled her nose as she fastened the last buttons on her cardigan. Sterling had explained how her parents were really into the whole ugly Christmas sweater thing and considered this their fun holiday tradition. It made April happy to be included but an ugly Christmas sweater was definitely not part of her wardrobe. She hoped the weirdly patterned cardigan her grandmother bought her last Christmas would be acceptable. 

“April! Come on, sweetie! We’re going to be late!” 

“Coming!” April responded as she checked her appearance one final time. 

She sighed, hoping this was enough. She really didn’t want to make it seem as if she wasn’t participating in the Wesleys’ family traditions. The fact that she and her mother were even included made her feel warm and loved and like she was starting new family traditions with people who would, maybe, someday be a huge part of her life. Of her future. 

Her future with Sterling. 

A huge smile formed on her lips as she gathered her things and bounded out of her room down the stairs. There was a lightness in her steps as she hurried to meet her mother. So much that when she reached the final steps, she hopped over them surprising her mother who was standing at the bottom. Mrs. Stevens regarded her for a moment before a huge smile split across her face. 

“Someone is in a good mood,” she noted, raising an eyebrow curiously. 

April blushed as she adjusted the strap on her shoulder. “I’m always in a good mood,” she defended, half rolling her eyes when her mother raised her brow even higher. “Lately. I’m always in a good mood lately.” 

Mrs. Steven chuckled touching her chin. “It looks good on you, sweetie.” Her gaze shifted downward inspecting her daughter’s outfit. “Speaking of looking good, where’s your ugly sweater?” 

April furrowed her brow, glancing down at her outfit. “What? Is this not enough?” She gripped the bottom of her cardigan examining the strange pattern and odd color combination. “It’s the most hideous thing I own. I had to dig way into my closet to find it.” 

“Well, it truly is not your style, sweetie but I think they were talking about something more festive like this-“ 

Mrs. Stevens stepped back and extended her arms to the side, giving April a better view of her sweater. April was taken back at the huge red nose reindeer sitting dead center of her mother’s sweater. There was something strangely classy about the design around the reindeer, but the overall sweater was just awful. Especially the fact that the nose stuck out further from the material. So far that April could actually tie a bow around it if the needed. 

“Mom, that is… bad.” April brought her hand to her mouth stifling her laughter. 

Her mother glanced downward, confused. She returned her attention to her daughter. “That’s the whole point, sweetie.” The older woman chuckled then checked the time on her watch again. Her eyes widened slightly, and she scrambled for her keys. “We should get going.” 

April nodded, smiling even wider when her mother wrapped her arm around her shoulders. She leaned into her mother. “Thanks for joining us tonight, mom.” 

Mrs. Stevens squeezed her close, placing a kiss on the top of her head. “I wouldn’t miss it for the world,” she responded, giving her daughter’s arm a comforting rub. “This is the beginning of new memories, sweetheart. And we are going to take every opportunity to make them.” 

“I couldn’t agree with you more.” 

* * *

Several guests had arrived at the Wesley home by the time Sterling came downstairs carefully carrying April’s gift from her family. She knew April wasn’t going to be a fan of what was inside the package, but she hoped... well, she knew… her girlfriend would see the sentiment behind the gift and love garment regardless. If anything, she would get a kick out of Sterling’s ugly sweater. 

A bright red and white monstrosity with the words “Made the Nice List” printed boldly on the front. 

“Oh, baby, I was wondering where you were,” Debbie greeted, putting the finishing touches on a tray of hors d'oeuvres. “I didn’t think it was going to take that long to wrap one gift.” 

Sterling placed the package down on the table. She fluffed the bright red bow sitting in the center of the gift. “I wanted to make sure it was perfect.” 

Debbie gave her daughter a loving smile, wiping her hands on a dishtowel. She made her way over to Sterling and wrapped her around her shoulders, giving her a gentle squeeze. “She’s going to love it, baby.” 

Sterling raised her brow and snorted a laugh. “She’s going to _hate_ it, mom. I don’t think we could have possibly picked an uglier sweater.” 

“Baby, she’s going to love it because it’s from us. A gift filled with love.” Debbie pressed a kiss to her temple giving her upper arm a gentle caress. “Now, why don’t you go put that under the tree until she gets here and go save your sister.” She released her embrace on Sterling and walked back over to the tray. “She’s come in here about four times looking for you because your cousin is driving her crazy.” Her hands raised and she released a frustrated growl. “And your Uncle Deacon has already told three inappropriate jokes-“ 

“I’ll calm everything down, mom,” Sterling promised as she leaned closer and pressed a kiss on her mother’s cheek. “Thanks for doing this.” She held up the present and smiled. “I really appreciate how welcome you’ve made April feel. It’s pretty important to me and I don’t know how to thank you.” 

“Oh, baby, you don’t have to thank me. April makes you happy and that makes loving her easy.” She winked then motioned toward the family room. “Now go before Blair comes running in here with your cousin’s head perched atop her lacrosse stick.” 

“On it.” 

* * *

“The Wesley’s really went all out this year.” 

April closed the car door and looked around the Wesley’s home. The house was covered with more lights than necessary. They stretched across the roof and down the front pillars lighting up the entire yard and the neighbor’s yard. There was a large inflatable snowman in the front yard surround by every possible Christmas ornament cliché. 

“Wait until you see the inside,” April quipped as she sent a quick text message to Sterling letting her know they arrived. “Anderson went a little overboard on the decorations this year.” 

“Anderson, huh?” her mother teased. She looped her arm through her daughters as they made their way up the driveway. “I see someone is on a first name basis with the parents.” 

April looked at her mother quizzically. “I’m sorry, did you not tell Sterling to call you Beth the other night?” 

Her mother chuckled, playfully slapping her arm. “Be nice to your mother.” She caught sight of someone making their way down the walkway, hopping over a few lawn decorations. “Speaking of Sterling.” 

April looked up in time to see her girlfriend excitedly walking toward them. The smile pulled instantly onto her lips and her stomach felt as if a thousand butterflies had been released all at once. The feeling Sterling gave her never ceased to amaze her and she hoped the feeling never ended. 

“Hey!” Sterling greeted, closing the space between them. She hugged Beth first, a tight loving squeeze and April warmed at the sight of it. Sterling leaned back admiring Beth’s sweater. “Oh my Gosh, Beth, I love it.” 

Beth chuckled, motioning her hand toward Sterling. “Yours is absolutely adorable. And completely accurate.” 

Sterling gripped the bottom of her sweater and tugging it outward. “Yeah, wait until you see Blair’s.” 

“Let me guess,” Beth said, with little thought. “Does it say she made the naughty list?” 

Sterling nodded. “Of course.” She reached out and took April’s hand, pulling her close to her side. A bright, beautiful smile filled her face as she inched closer. “Hey, babe. I missed you.” 

An amused expression crossed her face as Sterling placed a chaste kiss on her lips. “You just saw me a few hours ago,” she noted, cupping Sterling’s cheek. “But I missed you too.” 

“You two are adorable,” Beth cooed, causing both girls to blush. 

Sterling swallowed back her excitement and tightened her grip on April’s hand. “Come on. I’ll show you all inside.” 

They walked up the pathway toward the Wesley’s front door. Sterling strolled alongside her mother chatting away about the lake house and what a wonderful time they had. She continued to thank Beth for her generosity and the older woman stressed how it was her pleasure and gave Sterling’s free hand a loving squeeze. April’s heart swelled in her chest as she watched them interact. 

The two most important women in her life getting along was better than any Christmas wish. 

Once they reached the house and stepped inside, Sterling excused herself but not without giving April one more kiss. She extended the offer to make themselves at home stating she would meet them in the family room once she saved her sister from her Uncle and cousin. From the look on Sterling’s face, that was something she had been doing for most of the night already. 

As they walked further inside, Beth marveled at how decorated the inside of the house was. More lights and stockings lined the walls. There were dancing figures that swayed back and there were various nativity scenes in different corners of the house. A large tree sat in the family room surrounded by friends and family enjoying the holiday party. 

Beth leaned to her right so she could speak to April without being heard by the other party goers. “It looks like Santa threw up here,” she quipped, laughing when April took in surprised gasp. 

“Mom!” she scolded, playfully as they shared a joyful chuckle. 

“Beth! April! You made it!” Debbie Wesley gushed; arms extended outward as she approached the Steven’s family. She hugged Beth giving her a kiss on either cheek as she complimented the festiveness of Beth’s sweater. Her attention turned to April and she pulled her into a tight hug. “It’s so good to see you, dear.” 

“You too, Debbie,” April responded, giving her a quick squeeze. She inched back admiring Debbie’s outfit. “I love your sweater.” 

“Why thank you!” Debbie looked her up and down. “Yours is so fun, but I think we can do better.” 

“Do better?” April questioned, scrunching her brow. “I-didn’t bring another one.” 

Debbie chuckled as she waved her hand dismissively. “Follow me,” she requested, taking April’s hand in hers as she led her further into the family room. 

April glanced back at her mother, confused. Beth shook her head, raising her shoulders unknowingly. They weaved through the cluster of family members and walked over to the Christmas tree where Sterling was waiting for them, a huge smile on her adorable face. April relaxed instantly but still look at Sterling, a silent question in her gaze. 

Sterling simply smiled and leaned down to pick up a beautifully wrapped, rectangular box. She took a small step in the direction of April extending the box toward her. “My mom and I were shopping online, and I may have kind of mentioned how you don’t own anything ugly,” she explained, moving her gaze up and down her girlfriend’s form. “I guess I spoke too soon because I had no idea that was sitting in your closet.” 

April narrowed her eyes and gave her a hard poke against her side. The sound of Sterling’s laugh made goosebumps form on her skin. 

“We Wesley’s have a family tradition,” Debbie stepped in. “And, since you have become a very important part of this family, we wanted to make sure you were able to participate in our traditions.” She tapped the box in Sterling’s hand, nudging it closer to April. “And just so you know, this isn’t your actual Christmas present. You’ll get that one Christmas morning.” 

April looked from one woman to the other, awe filling her features. “I-you didn’t have to do this,” she said, the surprise from the moment weighed heavy in her tone. 

“We know, sweetheart.” Debbie smiled, brightly. “We wanted too.” 

Sterling met April’s eyes and she moved the box closer. “Open it, babe.” 

April hesitated for a moment before taking the box from Sterling’s hands. She looked at her mother who stepped beside her, resting her hands on her daughter’s shoulders. An anxious knot formed in her throat and she swallowed hard trying to combat the feeling. Her fingers moved slowly to unravel the bow followed by the wrapping paper. 

The lid for the box was the next to go. Sterling rested her hands underneath the box assisting April in her shaky efforts to keep the box from slipping to the floor. She quietly thanked her girlfriend as she pulled the sweater from the box unraveling the garment from the unnecessary amount of tissue paper it was bundled amongst. 

April raised her eyes to meet Sterling’s, a tiny half smile on her lips. “Did you wrap this?” 

Sterling grinned and nodded. 

“I could tell,” April teased as she unfolded the sweater, holding it up for a better view. 

It was an awful pink and blue patterned sweater with tiny flamingos wearing Christmas hats all standing in a straight line. There were at least four rows of them filling the entire front and back of the garment. As ugly as it was, April felt the warmth wash over her. It was almost overwhelming. 

Her love for Sterling, for her family, was more than she could ever ask for. 

“This is-“ April began, pausing as her brain tried to formulate the correct response. 

“Really ugly?” Sterling finished, causing everyone around them to laugh. 

April lowered the sweater, clutching it to her chest. “Thoughtful. Amazing and thoughtful.” She could feel the tears welding up behind her eyes, but she refused to let them fall. Not in front of a room full of Sterling’s family and family friends. “Thank you so much. I promise I’ll wear it Christmas morning.” 

Debbie pulled her in for a hug. “You better,” she whispered, rubbing April’s back lovingly as she placed a small kiss against her temple. She leaned back, smiling adorning at her daughter’s girlfriend before turning her attention to Beth. “Beth, why don’t we go in the kitchen and I show you where I hide the good wine.” 

“You don’t have to ask me twice,” Beth joked, placing a small kiss on April’s cheek before whispering in her ear. “You’ve got yourself a good one, sweetheart.” 

April smiled, the tears still sitting at the edge of her eyes. “I know,” she responded, shifting her gaze to Sterling. 

Beth touched her cheek, tenderly then turned to join Debbie on their quest for wine. 

Before she could say another word, Sterling took her hand and led her away from the party. She stumbled behind her girlfriend stopping in the foyer at the bottom of the staircase. Sterling stepped closer, cupping her cheeks as her eyes danced over April’s features. April hadn’t realized she was crying until she caught the concern on Sterling’s face and felt her thumb brush against her damp cheek. 

“I knew the sweater was ugly, but I didn’t think it’d be ugly enough to make you cry,” Sterling joked, trying to lighten the mood as always. 

April released a short, watery laugh as she raised her hand, wrapping her fingers around Sterling’s wrist. “I’m not crying because of the sweater-“ She paused, tilting her head in thought. “Well, I am but not because it’s ugly. I just… wasn’t expecting this. Any of this.” 

Sterling looked completely confused. “What do you mean?” 

“Being so welcomed by your family. Your mom basically making me part of your traditions.” She shook her head, clearing the overwhelming fog. “I’ve always thought being accepted like this.. being loved like this… was just some wild daydream.” She released her hold on Sterling’s wrist and rested her hand gently over the taller girl’s heart. “Being with you.. being part of all of this… means more to me than I could ever express. Even to you.” 

Sterling moved her hands resting them on April’s hips. Her thumbs hooked into her belt loops and she tugged April closer. “I think I have a pretty good idea though.” 

“I know you do.” April slid her hand upward tucking a strand of hair behind Sterling’s ear. “I love you. I’ve always loved you. And I am so unbelievably happy that we are finally able to be… _us_.” 

A wide smile broke across Sterling’s lips and she pulled April in for a kiss. A deep kiss filled with everything she wanted to say and everything she’d said so many times before. They lingered in the moment for what felt like an eternity, lips moving softly, slowly against one another’s. Sterling was the first to break away, the same smile playing on her lips as she tilted her chin upward and placed a kiss on April’s forehead. 

“You are my world,” Sterling stated, meeting her eyes. “And nothing will ever change that.” 

Another tear slipped from April’s eyes and Sterling slowly brushed it away, stroking her fingers against April’s soft skin. Like the magnet that always pulled them close, they leaned into one another and kissed again. Shutting out the world around them. 

“I knew you two snuck away to bone,” Blair teased, interrupting their moment. 

They reluctantly broke their kiss turning simultaneously to glare at the brunette. 

Blair ignored their looks and stepped closer. "What? After Sterling told me the sex door had been unlocked, I just knew--" 

April closed her eyes, raising her hand to cut Blair off. “Listen, Blair, I know Sterling tells you _everything_ but that doesn't mean we have to talk about what you talked about..” 

“Noted.” Blair smirked and nodded. She exhaled, releasing all of her teasing as she clapped her hands together. “If you two are done with all of this-“ She thrusted her thumb over her shoulder. “Could you come back to the party? I know I was close to decapitating Angela with my lacrosse stick, but I really think it’s going to happen if I have to keep acting like I give a shit about what she’s yapping on about.” 

Sterling sighed, waving her hand ushering Blair to lead the way. Her twin turned on her heels and made her way back to the family room. Sterling looked at April adoringly as she took her girlfriend’s hand once again. She raised their joined hands and placed a soft kiss against the back of April’s hand. 

April shivered lightly at the contact smiling when Sterling’s eyes met hers again. They held each other’s gaze momentarily. They shared one more short kiss before walking back to the family room to rejoin the party…..


	20. "Apple cider..."

Sterling stared blankly into space, unable to focus on anything right now. Her mind was a mess, filled with rings and, of course, April. Rings for April. A ring on April’s fingers. April’s fingers... She used to miss April's hair, her lips, her smell. And she definitely still missed all those things when they were apart. After the last few nights, though, Sterling found them replaced by other, new, obsessions. She missed April’s fingers, her tongue, her taste…

Not that Sterling would ever say that out loud in polite company. Even mentioning April’s smell was pushing it. She definitely had to mention to April that when she commented on those things from now on, her mind was absolutely busy thinking of other things.

Just like browsing for rings had devolved into thinking about April.

Her twin had suggested picking three styles and then making the final decision in person, when Sterling could actually see and hold them in her hand. That’s why she had the laptop in front of her with a lot more than five tabs open this time. In fact, she had so many tabs open it was no longer possible to make out the icons and her laptop was making this weird whining sound. Picking three styles was impossible. The choices were infinite. Material, color, design of the band, which stones to pick, especially taking the various meanings they had and connotations they brought with them into account.

But Sterling only had her eyes on one: she wanted a ring with a cluster of small diamonds arranged along a band with the infinity symbol incorporated into the design.

Even then, she felt overwhelmed.

When Blair jumped onto the bed next to her, she was happy for the distraction.

“Are you still browsing for rings? I thought we settled this.”

“Yeah, well, we did, but there’s so much to keep in mind. I wanted to be prepared for when we’re at the store.”

“Three styles. It’s not that hard.”

“When you have an April of your own to shop for, you’ll see.”

Blair rolled her eyes and poked her sister in the ribs. “Did you at least set a budget?”

“Uhh.” Some of the rings that had caught Sterling’s eye definitely seemed to be inappropriately expensive for a gift given after only six months together, but it _was_ a ring that she hoped April would wear every day until she could replace it with something even more permanent and meaningful. "Unlike you, I saved the majority of my money from the bounty hunting days," she told her sister with a shrug.

“Sterl,” Blair gave her a stern look. “Are you about to go overboard in a coco crazy kinda way?”

“Nope,” Sterling stated, confident she was doing the right thing. “I just don’t worry about it. It doesn’t matter if the perfect ring is fifty bucks of five-hundred.”

“F-five? Okay, sis, you’re definitely in the risk zone here.”

“She’s worth it.”

“I know that.” Blair wrapped an arm around Sterling’s shoulders. “You don’t have to tell me that.” 

“I love her.”

Blair squeezed her sister. “We’ll worry about it once we’re at the store. I promise to slap you if you’re about to do something stupid. Twin Swear.”

“And I love you too.”

“Not like you love April.”

“No, because that’d be...” Sterling drifted off before making a face.

“Yeah, I’m sorry I ever said that” Blair laughed. “When’s April picking us up?”

“Not sure yet. I know she wants to get to Atlantic Station by five.”

“Atlantic Station?”

“For the market?”

“That’s at Centennial Park, Sterl.”

“What? No!” Sterling felt the panic rising. “It’s at Atlantic Station. It’s always been there.”

“Not this year. This year it’s at Centennial Park.”

“How are we going to sneak away and get the ring then? We’ll be miles from the jewelry store. April will definitely notice.” She deflated, falling back against the headboard. “And it’s too late to order a ring online and I really don’t want to do that anyway, not after you scared me with that story about that J-Hope doll you ordered arriving with the face half-melted looking _nothing_ like him.”

“When you’re done overthinking this, I have an easy solution to your problem.”

“There isn’t one. I’m doomed.”

“Let’s just leave early, pick out a ring and drive over to the market with time to spare.”

“That might work.”

“It’s not rocket science.”

“No, but you could still be a rocket scientist if you wanted to. You could do anything you set your mind to.”

“I know, I’m badass,” Blair gloated briefly before giving Sterling a big hug, “but thank you so much for your support. I love it when you hype me up like that.”

“Twin Support Mode Activate!”

“Ugh, Stevens is turning you into a nerd.”

“She, uh, she opened my eyes to a very interesting part of the world.”

“Star Wars. Do you really want to claim watching Star Wars is broadening your horizons? Did you put that on your college application?”

“Shut up. It’s okay to like stuff.”

“Especially if your girlfriend likes it too.”

“Yes, and it helps that she’s, you know, actually discerning. She told me after we finished the prequels that she’d never make me watch them again.”

“But she still made you watch them once.”

“Only so I wouldn’t be lost when we started watching Clone Wars.”

“Jesus, Sterl, how much Star Wars have you watched over the last six months?”

“Uh, all of it.”

Blair coughed like somebody had punched her in the gut. “Ugh, I take it back. Nothing is worth that. Not even Little Miss Perfect.”

“For every Jar-Jar, there’s a Rey or Ahsoka or Leia.”

“I get it, I get it.”

“Or Baby Yoda.”

“Even I get the appeal of that cute little green freak. The way he gobbled those eggs! He’s like my spirit animal.”

“Told you. The Mandalorian is a good show.”

“Eh, it’s not bad. I don’t get the big deal she made of it at the lake house.” Blair tilted her head sideways so she could watch her sister’s reaction. “And for some reason, you suddenly became very concerned with making sure your girlfriend would get to watch a silly show without being spoiled.”

“I’m considerate.” Sterling put on her best poker face, which, let’s face it, was abysmal.

“You’re a pushover when it comes to Stevens.”

“Am not.” She was pretty sure the jig was up when she was saved by the proverbial bell, _Rey’s Theme_ playing from her phone, indicating April was calling.

“Speak of the She-Devil,” Blair joked before sitting up straight. “Hey, that’s not the ringtone I assigned.”

“April fixed it. So, she got to have her pick.”

“Bah.” Blair sank back down. “She ruins all my fun.”

Sterling fussed with her hair for a second before initiating the FaceTime call. “Hey babe! I miss you so much. Can’t wait to see you at five.”

“You’ll see me sooner than that. I’m picking you up, remember?”

“Uh, babe, we’re going to take our own car.”

“What? Why? It’s such a waste when we all fit comfortably into the Jeep.”

“I know, and believe me, Blair gave me an earful, but--” Sterling decided honesty was the way to go “--I have to pick up something special for someone special.”

“Aww, you bought Hannah B a Christmas present?”

Sterling smiled and gasped in mock shock. “How did you know? Please don’t tell her, but I’m getting her her own chicken coop.”

April snapped her fingers. “Dang, I wish I’d thought of that. You’re going to make my chicken pattern Crocs seem so inadequate.”

“Whoop! I win!” Sterling shimmed on top of her bed in a cute little victory dance.

“Sterling, tell me you’re not actually getting her a coop for Christmas.”

She laughed in response, “Of course not. I bought her that ‘fowl language’ glass we found.”

“Oh good,” April exhaled.

“You’re relieved? You thought I might _actually_ do that?”

“You have gone overboard before,” April pointed out.

Sterling patented pout appeared, melting April’s heart. “Only the once. And it wasn’t like categorically insane or anything.”

“Honey, you tried to take me to Bacchanalia.”

“I heard it was the best restaurant in Atlanta. I just wanted the best for you.”

April smiled. “I’m not going to fault you for that, but that would’ve been a two-hundred dollar meal. And that’s before adding drinks..”

“They wouldn’t have let us order any fancy wine anyway.”

“That’s right, and why? Because we’re teens. Bacchanalia is not really a place for teen dates.”

Sterling smiled shyly, forgetting that Blair was next to her. “That date turned out pretty amazing anyway.”

“Yes, yes it did.” April looked like she too was busy reliving that night. “Not that I ever really had any doubts, but when you—”

Blair’s loud and prolonged fake puking drowned out whatever April was trying to say.

“I’m sorry, babe,” Sterling laughed. “I should’ve told you she was here. I love you and I’ll see you soon.”

“I love you, Sterl. Please don’t be late. I miss you.”

“I miss your hair, your lips, your smell,” Sterl turned her back to Blair and started whispering, “and some other things I definitely miss a lot, but I’ll have to tell you about those later.”

April’s ears turned pink. “I’ll hold you to that.”

* * *

The moment Sterling walked into the jewelry store; she felt a calm come over her. This had been the right idea from the very beginning and now she was about to finally get April the present she deserved.

“Hi, can I help you?”

Sterling tore her eyes from the display cases filled with a huge assortment of amazingly beautiful rings, some of them way beyond Sterling’s means, but definitely being filed away for the day she would return for an engagement ring. “Uh, hi, I’m looking for a ring.”

The clerk—Anna, according to the name tag—smiled and nodded. “Anything in particular?”

“I want to get my girlfriend a promise ring for Christmas.”

“Your girlfriend is very lucky.”

“No, I’m the lucky one.*

Anna laughed. “I’m sure you make a very cute couple. May I ask how long you’ve been together?”

“Six months,” Sterling smiled happily, looking back at the best six months. “But we’ve known each other most of our lives.”

“That’s sweet. Best friends who fall in love.”

“Actually, it was more like friends to enemies to—” Sterling bit her lip, realizing what she almost said “—girlfriends, and someday, I hope, more than that.”

“I would hope so. If you’re getting her a promise ring you must love her very much.”

“I do. She means everything to me.” Sterling couldn’t help it, she wanted to tell this stranger everything about April. “W-we’ve only been together for six months officially, but there was something there a lot earlier. And we, uh, had an aborted attempt before.”

“But you worked it out and now you’re together.”

“We are. We’ve been blessed. Removing a single variable suddenly made the whole thing click into place. Get rid of one homophobic parent and suddenly you can come out and feel free to live your life openly and love whomever you chose to love.”

Anna nodded. “It’s a tale I wish I wasn’t as familiar with as I am.”

“And living in a conservative Christian community didn’t help but being surrounded by family and friends who offer support and love..” Sterling felt herself being welling up.

Anna put a comforting hand on Sterling’s arm. “Sweetie, I understand.”

“I apologize for getting so emotional. I’ve done a lot of thinking about this over the last month or so when I realized this would be our first Christmas together. I want her to know that I want it to be followed by many, many more.”

“I’m sure she already knows that and wants exactly the same thing.”

“Yes, we’ve talked about it more than might be healthy,” Sterling chuckled, “but like I said, things were complicated and if we couldn’t communicate, well, what would be the point?”

“That’s a _healthy_ attitude, if you ask me.”

“Thank you,” Sterling gave the very nice clerk a smile and wiped a tear out of the corner of her eye.“

“If I may offer a suggestion,” Anna said. “Based on what you told me, I think a trilogy design would be perfect.”

“I don’t know, I had my mind set on something that would suggest infinity.”

“We do have some rings like that but hear me out. A trilogy ring has three stones, representing past, present and future. I think you’d agree that definitely applies to the journey the two of you have been on to date.”

Sterling nodded, still not convinced.

“But since you told me that you live in a Christian community—and you’ll have to forgive me for making this assumption—I thought that you would like that the three stones can also stand for the father and the son and the holy spirit. If you got her a ring like that, it would carry a double meaning. Not only a sign of how much you love her, but also a celebration of your faith.”

Sterling nodded, mulling it over. The infinity designs she had browsed through definitely held an undeniable appeal to her, but this felt even more meaningful.

“Yo, sis! Are you done, or what? Finding parking was hell.”

Sterling groaned. Her twin always picked the wrong time to interrupt. “Not yet. Anna thinks we should look at trilogy rings.”

“What about the infinity design?”

“I’d be happy to show you some beautiful rings with that detail,” Anna said.

“Sterling, what do you think?” Blair addressed Anna when Sterling didn’t answer. “I always like Claddagh rings. Or just hearts in general. Do you have anything like that?”

“Certainly.”

“Blair,” Sterling hissed. “What are you doing? I liked the trilogy ring suggestion.”

“And before that you had your heart set on the infinity design. I’m just sayin’, we’re here for a reason. Three styles for you to pick from, all according to plan.”

“Fine,” Sterling sighed. “Anna, if you’d kindly show us a selection from all three styles.”

“I can do that. We have many beautiful rings that will look lovely on your girlfriend’s finger. Do you have a prince range in mind?”

Sterling bit her lip and nodded. “I can go as high as a thousand dollars.” Once she ducked Blair’s outraged slap, she added, “April is worth it.”

* * *

It was a beautifully cool night in Atlanta. 

They honestly could not have picked a better night to enjoy the Christkindl Market. Every year for the holidays the traditional German Christmas Market opened and filled the city with the best smelling food and beautiful lights. It was one of April’s favorite ways to get into the holiday spirit and she was so thankful to be able to share this tradition with Sterling. 

If she actually showed up on time. 

“Is your girlfriend always late?” Ezequiel asked as they strolled the pathway. He stopped at a random booth checking out a few items. 

“No, not always.” April stood beside him and pulled her phone out of her jacket to check the time. “And she’s only five minutes late.” 

“Why didn’t they just ride with us?” Hannah B asked, ripping off a piece of her pretzel and popping it into her mouth. 

“Because Evil Twin thinks April drives too slow,” Ezequiel quipped, taking a final glance at all the items surrounding the booth. 

April rolled her eyes as they made their way down the brightly lit pathway. “I drive safely unlike those two.” She turned slightly and squinted. “Do you know Sterling hit a parking curb?” She scoffed, stuffing her hands further into her pockets. “I didn’t even know that was possible.” 

“I hit a bird once,” Hannah B. offered, taking another bite of her pretzel. Her eyes went wide, and she waved her hand. “It was a total accident. I didn’t even realize they could fly that low.” 

Ezequiel looked at Hannah B. like she had grown a second head. He shook his head, deciding against making a comment and focused on April. "So," he said, dragging the word out to a preposterous degree. “Did you make happier memories at the lake house?” He danced his fingers over her shoulder teasingly. 

April swatted his hand away blushing from the sound of his laugh and his implication. She tried her hardest to stop the smile from spreading as she remembered her night with Sterling. Their night at the lake house surpassed every memory she’d ever made there. Now when she thought about her times there, the memory at the forefront would be the way Sterling made her feel and waking up to her beautiful face the next morning. 

“That smile says yes,” Ezequiel singsonged, abruptly stopping at another booth. 

April was sure her face was the color of the red Santa sweater hanging on the inside of the tiny booth. “Having all of you there made the final memories of that place happier,” she answered, curving the conversation. 

Ezequiel hummed, picking up an oddly shaped Christmas tree. “Not buying it.” 

“I believe you, April.” Hannah B. chimed in, tossing her napkin into the trash. She bounced happily over to them admiring a few items around the area. “I had a really great time. And, I guess, Nightmare isn’t so creepy.” 

Another hum from Ezequiel. “That’s only because you used Evil Twin as an Oogie Boogie shield.” 

April narrowed her eyes curiously as she turned to Hannah B. “Is there something you want to tell us concerning Blair?” 

Hannah B. looked confused for a moment. Then, like a light suddenly clicked on, her brown eyes widened, and she gasped. “Oh my gosh, no! Blair and I are just friends-“ She squinted, tilting her head to the side. “Are we friends now? I mean, it’s almost like we’ve been joined together through a pseudo marriage.” 

Ezequiel gasped, placing his hand his chest. “Way to use pseudo correctly, Hannah B.” 

Hannah B shot him a look. “I passed my vocab exam, Ezequiel.” 

“Good for you.” 

April quietly chuckled, reaching out to rest her hand on Hannah B.’s back. “I hope you guys are friends,” she stated, gently rubbing her back. “Having the most important people in my life, including Blair, getting along is one of the things I really hoped would happen.” 

Hannah B. smiled brightly. “Then we’re friends. I’ve always liked Sterling.” She scrunched her nose. “Blair took a minute to get used to but she’s actually really sweet.” 

April raised her brow surprised at the use of verbiage describing Blair. “Sweet was never a word I thought would be used to describe Blair. I mean, Sterling absolutely-“ 

“That’s a biased response,” Ezequiel noted as they continued to stroll. 

April side eyed him and smiled. “Biased maybe but definitely true.” Her phone vibrated and she quickly pulled the device from her pocket. Sterling’s name appeared on the screen and she immediately swiped her thumb across the screen opening the message. 

**Sterl** 🤸  
Hey, babe! We just got here. Where should we meet you? 

**April** 💞  
You’re late. 

**Sterl** 🤸  
I know!! I’m sorry ☹ The special gift for my special person took longer than I thought.

**April** 💞  
You better hope Hannah B. appreciates the effort you made finding that glass. 

**Sterl** 🤸  
Fingers crossed! 😊 Now… where do we meet you so I can show you how sorry I am for being late?

**April** 💞  
By the Ferris Wheel. We’ll be there in five minutes and you better be too.

**Sterl** 🤸  
I love it when you’re bossy.

April rolled her eyes, chuckling quietly as she slid her phone back into her pocket forgoing a response. She would show Sterling how bossy she could be in person. “They’re here. We have to meet them by the Ferris Wheel.” 

Hannah B. clapped excitedly. “Oh, can we go on the Ferris Wheel?” 

“Ew, no, girl, those things are not safe,” Ezequiel stated, clicking his tongue. “They’re put together in five minutes by drunk carnies. I am _not_ getting on that thing.” 

Hannah B released a tiny whine and pouted. “You stink.” Her expression shifted and she smiled hopefully. “Maybe we can get Blair and Sterling to go on it.” 

Ezequiel huffed, rolling her eyes. “I don’t know why you all keep inviting me on your double dates,” he teased, laughing when Hannah B. punched his arm…. 

* * *

“Will someone please go on it with me?” Hannah B. whined, pointing toward the large brightly lit ride behind them. 

“Later, Hannah B.!” Blair groaned, resting her hand on her stomach. She tossed her head back dramatically. “I just want a cupcake.” 

“I don’t think they have cupcakes here,” Ezequiel noted as they made their way back to the festive displays of food and Christmas decorations. 

“Good. We don’t need cupcakes,” Sterling stated, wrapping her arms around April from behind. 

April found walking difficult with the added weight of Sterling pressed against her back, walking in step with her. She didn’t mind though. Even though they’d done this so many times, being affectionate with her girlfriend in public always made her feel like she was floating. Especially now since their intimacy was on a new level. 

She wanted Sterling to touch her whenever humanly possible. 

“I thought you loved cupcakes?” April asked, glancing at her from the corner of her eye. 

“I love you and you’re sweet like a cupcake,” Sterling replied, placing a trail of kisses along April’s neck tickling her skin and her girlfriend to release a high pitched laugh she’d never heard before. She committed the sound to memory, and she continued her onslaught of kisses. “I could eat you up.” 

“Didn’t you do that already?” Blair asked, laughing when they both shot her a dirty look. A smug grin crossed her lips when Ezequiel gave her a high five. “See? Z thought it was funny.” 

“Uh-uh,” he warned, wiggling his index finger. “We are not giving me a nickname like that.” 

Blair pressed her lips together and hummed. “Nah, I think I’ll keep using it.” 

“Well, I won’t answer.” 

“Hmm, I don’t know. I can be pretty persistent.” 

“She really can be,” April and Sterling added, in unison. 

Hannah B. turned to them, taking in an excited breath. “Aw, you guys are saying things at the same time! That is the cutest!” 

“Gross,” Blair murmured, wrinkling her nose. 

“Agreed,” Ezequiel added, then suddenly snapped his fingers. “They have Nutella chimney cake and Glühmost.” 

Sterling furrowed her brow confused. “What is Glühmost?” she asked, stumbling over the pronunciation of the last word. 

April chuckled, reaching back to touch her cheek. “It’s apple cider, honey.” 

“Oh! I love apple cider! Let’s get that.” Sterling exclaimed, squeezing April happily. 

“I guess,” Blair grumbled, crossing her arms against her chest. 

“Then can we go on the Ferris Wheel?” Hannah B. requested, throwing her arm out dramatically to the side. 

“Yes, Hannah B.,” April promised, a soft smile on her lips… 

* * *

After a few random stops, and the incessant whining from Blair about being hungry, they found the booth selling the items Ezequiel had spoken of earlier. Once they ordered they settled into a picnic table within the designated eating area. Sterling sat between April and Blair while Ezequiel and Hannah B. took the bench across from them. 

“When we're done riding the death trap Hannah B. insists on going on, we need to go back to this little booth I saw,” Ezequiel requested, taking a bite of his cake. “There was a Christmas ornament I wanted to get for my mom.” 

“Aww, aren’t you sweet,” Blair cooed, shoving a large bite of cake into her mouth. “There is huge light up shark thing-“ She raised her hands in air animatedly moving them like she was mapping the out the design. “It’s bright and sparkly. I want to take a picture under that.” 

“Like a group picture?” April asked, bringing her drink to her lips. A smile crossed her face when Sterling gently squeezed her thigh under the table. 

Blair shrugged. “Sure, why not?” She took another large bite followed by an even larger sip of her drink. “We’re like a family now, right? Might as well commemorate it.” 

Sterling smiled wide at her sister’s words and released a small _‘aw_ ’. “Look at you, Blair,” she said, giving her sister a tiny nudge. “Getting all soft for the holidays.” She grinned as she brought her own drink to her mouth. 

Her drink barely touched her lips before Blair reached out and tapped the bottom of Sterling’s glass. The light force caused the liquid to spill covering the bottom half of Sterling’s face including her nose. She screeched, dropping what remained of her drink on the top of the table. Blair broke into hysterical laughter ignoring the shocked look on everyone’s face. 

“Blair!” Sterling scolded, sputtering. “I got apple cider up my nose!” 

“That’s what you get for calling me soft,” Blair defended. She picked up her food and inched away from Sterling, removing herself from any form of retaliation. 

“Not cool, Blair,” April stated, grabbing a napkin. “Look at me, honey.” She cupped Sterling’s chin and turned her face to her. “Ugh, you are mess.” A half-smile played on her lips as she wiped her girlfriend’s face. 

“Thanks a lot, Blair.” 

Blair raised her shoulders innocently as she held her hand out toward them. “Hey, if it wasn’t for me you wouldn’t be getting taken care of by the love of your life.” 

“Evil Twin does have a point.” 

Sterling rolled her eyes and focused on April once again. “Thank you, babe.” 

“My pleasure.” April wiped the last of the cider from her face then placed a small kiss on her lips. She inched back but remained hovering close. “Am I really the love of your life?” 

Sterling nodded dumbly. “Absolutely.” The corner of her mouth ticked upward. “Am I yours?” 

“You know it,” April whispered, giving her another soft kiss followed by a warm, loving smile. 

Blair made a gagging noise from her new seat far from Sterling but still managed to get hit with the balled up napkin April chucked her way. 

Hannah B. cleared her throat bringing everyone’s attention to her. “So, you know what would really ease the tension of that little incident?” 

Ezequiel sighed, turning to look at her with a raised eyebrow. “Going on the Ferris Wheel?” 

Hannah B. nodded, a wide grin on her lips. “Going on the Ferris Wheel.”


	21. "Stop taking pictures..."

Four more days until Christmas. 

April sighed as she glanced over at the array of gifts that arrived for Sterling. Maybe Ezequiel was right. Maybe she had gone a little overboard, but she really didn’t care. Sterling deserved the world and April would do anything to give it to her. The funny thing is, out of everything she purchased for Sterling, her favorite gift was the one she made with her own two hands. 

She remembered finding her gift idea when Hannah B suggested checking Pinterest and Etsy. The Love Jar stood out as the most thoughtful and fun gift which reminded her of Sterling in so many ways. It was honestly the best way to show her girlfriend how much she truly meant to her and it ended up costing her practically nothing. 

All she needed was a pretty jar, some colored paper, and her exceptionally neat handwriting. 

She took the final touch off of her personal printer and carefully placed it on the front of her Love Jar. A creation filled with 365 different expressions of her love for Sterling along with some fun things they could do together on their date nights. She smiled to herself as she placed the “rules” on the front of the jaw. It wasn’t like there were really any actually rules to loving one another but there were for the way Sterling would chose what note to pick each day: 

**Directions:  
**

**Inside this “365 Note Jar”, you will find three hundred and sixty-five notes. Each morning, you can pick one and read it off to start your day with the smile you know I love.**

**Rules:  
One a day, Sterl. No cheating! I love you. **

**Key:  
**

****Blue: I love how…** **

******Pink: Remember when…** ** **

********Purple: We’re doing this…** ** ** **

********

April smiled, satisfied with her finishing touches and placed the gift gently among the others. Their first Christmas together was definitely shaping up to be a memorable one and she hoped that she’d done enough. Some would say she’d done more than enough but was there really a limit to showing Sterling how much she loved her? To showing her how much she changed her life in the best ways possible? 

********

Absolutely not. 

********

She caught the time on her clock from the corner of her eye and cursed inwardly. Time was running out and she still hadn’t decided what she was wearing on their date. Out of every holiday they’d participated in over the last few weeks, tonight was the one she was looking forward to the most. It had been a long time since she’d been ice skating at Atlantic Station. Her mother used to take her all the time, but John soon squashed that tradition stating too many weirdos had invaded the space that was supposed to be a family experience. 

********

And by weirdos, he meant the community April was so proud to be a part of. 

********

When Sterling suggested they make ice skating a date night and not a group activity, she all but jumped at the chance. Getting to do something she loved again with the person she loved was another step in putting her past exactly where it belonged. Tucked away with all the other memories her father tarnished with his bigotry and hatred. Life had given her a reset button and its name was Sterling Wesley. 

********

“Okay, April, focus,” she told herself as she turned her attention to her bed. 

********

She’d laid three outfits out on her bed. Three different versions of herself that she knew Sterling loved. She picked up her cellphone and checked the weather for the evening. Forty degrees on an ice skating rink definitely felt like layering would be the best idea. At least that eliminated one choice. Now, she just had to figure out which of the two remaining outfits would make Sterling give her that look that made her heart flutter and her patella’s quiver until she slipped into a puddle on the floor. 

********

Out of pure desperation, she opened the camera on her phone and snapped a photo of her last two choices. She typed a quick message and sent the photo off to Hannah B hoping she would responded as quickly as she normally does. Her phone vibrated and she was thankful for her best friends promptness. 

********

**Hannah B** 🐤:  
Ohhh!! You should totally wear the flannel with that really pretty shirt underneath it! And the beanie! Sterling loves when you wear beanies! And jeans because… let’s face it… your butt really does look amazing in those jeans… 

********

**Hannah B** 🐤:  
OMG! Was it weird that I just said that? Was it too much? I mean, it’s true but I don’t want to be weird and make anyone uncomfortable! 

****April smiled fondly at her phone and typed back a quick response.** **

**April** 🐢  


****It’s fine, Hannah, we've been over this, it's okay to build your friends up. It doesn't mean you're hitting on me. And you’re not wrong, my butt does look AMAZING in jeans…** **

**Hannah B** 🐤:  
Haha! Yes! Have fun on your date! Text me all the deets later! 

********

April tossed her phone onto her bed and grabbed Hannah B’s suggested outfit. Her friend was right. Sterling always loved when April dressed casually. She’d made that noticeably clear on several occasions. If it weren’t for the fact that they would be out in public, April would have settled on a simple hoodie and jeans, but this was a date and she needed to look her best. She ignored the little voice in the back of her head that reminded her she could wear a burlap sack and Sterling would think she was the most gorgeous person she’d ever seen. 

********

April smiled at the thought. Her girlfriend was amazing. 

********

She changed her clothes making sure to layer on an extra jacket just in case the temperature dropped below what the weather person predicted. She slipped her dark beanie onto her head and adjusted the fit, so it sat loosely at the back of her head. April turned from side to side, checking her appearance one final time before gently slapping her hands against her side. 

********

She was as ready as she’d every be. And she could not wait any longer to see her girlfriend. It was crazy how much she missed her even after seeing her less than twenty four hours prior. 

********

April walked back over to her bed and picked up her phone, sending a quick text to Sterling. 

********

**April** 💞  
Hey, honey, I’m ready so I’ll be on my way in about ten minutes.

********

**Sterl** 🤸  
Shoot! Okay, I should be ready by the time you get here. What are you wearing?

********

**April** 💞  
Um, are you genuinely asking or is this your version of foreplay?

********

**Sterl** 🤸  
….both? 😊

****April chuckled lightly as she opened her camera. She raised her phone taking a full body selfie.** **

**April** 💞  
This.

********

**Sterl** 🤸  
Dang, babe! A warning would be nice! I almost dropped my phone! You look amazinggg!

********

**April** 💞  
I’m glad you think so 😊 Now, hurry up and finish getting ready. I’ll see you soon.

********

**Sterl** 🤸  
kk! I love you!

********

**April** 💞  
I love you more.

********

**Sterl** 🤸  
kk! I love you most…

********

**April** 💞  
We’re not doing this…

********

**Sterl** 🤸  
haha! Okay, okay! See you soon 😊 

********

* * *

“Why are you wasting time on this, sis?” The brunette one, the Evil Twin, the sugar fiend Blair Wesley sat cross-legged on her sister’s bed, watching Sterling stress over a sure thing, while she sucked on candy cane, one of the last of the ones she’d manage to, ahem, acquire during working on the Christmas decorations at Willingham.

“You’re supposed to be helping me pick out a cute outfit, Blair, not work on another sugar high you’ll end up regretting.” She flicked her head, indicating Blair’s current oral fixation.

“I regret nothing.” Blair frowned. “Okay, maybe some things, but my point is you’re going skating at Atlantic Station. It’s outdoors. You’ll be wearing a big puffy orange jacket.”

Sterling glared at her unhelpful twin. “I’m not going to be naked underneath.”

“Why not?” Blair laughed and waggled her eyebrows. “Whatever you wear is going to end up crumpled on the floor anyway. Might as well eliminate a needless step.”

“It’s a date. Just a date. The first one we’ve been on for weeks.” Sterling put the rainbow trim tank back. It was cute, but not really date wear. And it was probably too chilly for it anyway, even with a jacket on.

“You spend practically every waking moment together. It’s gross. I miss having my best friend for a sister.”

Sterling pulled out a knitted cardigan. Not really what she’d consider cute, but it had a deep V-neck and if she didn’t wear anything else under, April would definitely appreciate it. And it did frame the cross hanging around her neck nicely. “That’s not the same. This is just us, no distractions, focusing on us.”

“I’m pretty sure I could be on the floor having a seizure and if April was around, you wouldn’t notice for ten minutes.”

“That’s not true.”

“You’re _always_ focused on each other. Don’t need to be on a date for that.”

Sterling blushed, finding it hard to keep the conversation with Blair going when she kept reminding her of the way April looked at her, even when she was doing nothing in particular. Maybe especially when she was doing nothing in particular, because then she knew April was simply looking at _her_. “That’s true. But there are still distractions.”

“Are you calling me a distraction?”

“The way you snipe at April sure seems like one.”

“That’s not a distraction. It’s a hobby. America’s new favorite past-time.” Blair grinned obnoxiously, clearly enjoying how being herself was getting to Sterling. She _loved_ her sister. She loved how happily and stupidly in love she was. Blair might even love April some day, because the way she loved Sterling was pure and right and kinda inspirational, but right now she mainly loved being obnoxious. It might have something to do with the sugar. Again. “Not my fault Stevens is so easy to rile up. And you _know_ that’s how I express affection.”

“I know.” Sterling sighed. She really was looking forward to this date, but a part of her still wished they could just stay in, curl up on the couch under a blanket and watch some silly Christmas movie while fussing around doing nothing, just enjoying each other’s company without any pressure or distractions.

The way April lit up when she suggested going ice skating had been amazing though and when Sterling remembered her delighted clapping and sparkling eyes, she knew her little ice princess—something very different to the ice queen nickname she had earned during sophomore year—would definitely be strapping the skates back on tonight.

“Do you have something I can wear?”

“Something of mine, you mean?”

“Yes. Obviously.”

“No. Obviously.” Blair stuck her tongue out when Sterling glared at her. “Unless you’re prepared to burn it after your date and buy me a replacement. I’m not wearing anything that stinks of April.”

When Sterling’s phone buzzed and stopped her from giving her twin a very pointed piece of her mind, her mood instantly brightened. It meant April would be here soon. When the flirtatiously asked April what she was wearing and immediately got a selfie in return, Sterling felt like she might float off into space. The way April’s flawless smirk looked coming from underneath that beanie had her reeling. Her girlfriend was God’s cutest creation.

“She’s on her way over to pick me up.”

“It must be nice to have your own personal chauffeur.”

“She still refuses to be seen in Rudolph.”

“Rudolphina.”

“I think she’s hurting his—”

“Her.”

Sterling threw her hands in the air and stomped over to the bed, grabbing her sister by the shoulders. “Blair, for the love of the lord, I’m going to send you to sugar rehab. If it doesn’t exist, I’m going to start one, because you need help.”

“Do you want to get ready or keep bantering? I assume you’re on a deadline now.”

Sterling released a deeply frustrated breath, turning back to the delicate process Blair had distracted her from. Instead, she took a step into her closet, arms outstretched, gathering as much as possible into her arms. She dumped almost all the clothes in her wardrobe into a huge pile on the bed, right in front of Blair. “There. Work off some of that excess energy by picking something cute.

It annoyed Sterling to no end when it didn’t even take Blair a minute to hold up a cute striped turtleneck sweater that would indeed be perfect.

* * *

Sterling didn’t even bother checking her phone when she felt the soft vibration and ding that meant she received a new message. She flew down the stairs, grabbing a jacket on her sprint to the door and shouted her good-byes without bothering to wait for any replies; April was waiting outside to take her on a date, after all. She felt ridiculous—oh no, now she was doing it too—being this excited about seeing April and going out on a date with her, but it really felt different.

She stumbled out the front door and was greeted by April, standing beside the Jeep waiting for her. When she saw Sterling exit the Wesley house, looking like an orange marshmallow man, she reached over and pulled the handle, slowly opening the passenger side door.

“All this for little ol’ me?” Sterling grinned, putting a hand on her chest.

“I pride myself on my manners.” April said, struggling to keep a matching grin off her face. “And I wouldn’t be much of a gentlewoman if I made my date open her own doors.”

“Gentle?” Sterling teased. “Gentle is _not_ the first word I associate with you. Any more.” She kissed the corner of April’s mouth and cupped her cheek. “God, I’ve missed you.”

April chuckled. “No taking His name in vain.”

“He made you and made our love possible. I’m sure He will forgive me.” She grabbed April’s jacket and pulled her close. “Did I tell you how much I missed you?

April wrapped her arms around Sterling’s neck. “Yes, I was informed.”

“I missed you,” Sterling nodded and nuzzled close to April. “I’ve missed your fingers, your tongue, your taste.”

April felt a shiver go down her spine, and she blushed furiously. “Sterl…”

“I know. Not here, not now. I just needed you to know.” Sterling noticed April shivering. “Are you cold, babe? Not sure how, you’re wearing at least give layers.”

April pushed all other thoughts aside and leaned into the explanation. “Layering is the proper way to stay warm. It’s all about trapping air. It’s the best insulator.”

“Oh, I don’t mind, babe. I don’t care about the how and why, I just know it will be like unwrapping a gift.” Sterling didn’t care how thirsty she sounded. “First you undo the ribbon, then you carefully remove the wrapping. Once you have the box in your hands, you can open it up and finally untangle the gift from the flimsy tissue paper covering it.” April was a snack. She was a gift. And best of all, she was Sterling’s. “Then it’s yours, to love and cherish.”

“Sterl…” April choked on her breath.

Sterling replied by kissing her deeply.

They drove over to Atlantic Station mostly in comfortable silence. They held hands across the center console, lazily exchanging caresses and squeezes, always looking at each other to exchange loving smiles, and every so often, Sterling took April’s hand to her lips for a soft kiss. The anticipation grew the closer they got to their destination, and eventually April felt the need to break the silence.

“I was something of a Michelle Kwan fangirl when I was younger, you know,” she said.

“Oh,” Sterling said, looking surprised, suddenly wondering if not all Adeles had been classmates or friends.

“The way she combined technical excellence with expressive artistry was inspiring.”

Sterling nodded. “I get that. I can see that in you.”

“I think I could recognize the gracefulness of ballet in her. And the way everybody loved her for it…” April drifted off, obviously lost in memories that weren’t exactly happy.

“If you’d said Nancy Kerrigan, I could’ve been Tonya to your Nancy,” Sterling offered, trying to lighten the mood.

April scoffed, “You’re not a better skater than I am.”

“Nononono,” Sterling stumbled over her words, opting to end what she meant to say by mimicking swinging a bat. Or something. She met April’s confused gaze with a shrug and a nod that seemed to say, _Y’know what I mean_.

“You never would’ve done anything like that, even back when we were rivals. You’re nothing like her.” April pulled into the slow lane, making sure the road was clear ahead of her. “Or Dana. You’re Sterling Pearl _Wesley_. And you are the most amazing, wonderful, beautiful human being on the planet... it’s one of the many reasons I love you so much. You’re so _good_. Nobody could ever think you a Tonya."

Sterling exhaled shakily. What was meant to be a silly, light-hearted comment apparently hit much closer to home than she intended or ever expected. “Thank you for saying that. Honestly, I don’t know what—I love you, April. You really are the love and light of my life.”

April sat on a bench right outside the rink, putting on her rented skates. She’d made a face when they were offered to her, but since it was years since she had a pair of her own, she had no choice but to wear these, certainly well-used by hygiene-deficient eleven year-olds previously. She made another face.

“Here, let me help,” Sterling offered, kneeling down in front of April. She supported her girlfriend’s ankle as she pushed on the skate, making sure it was seated properly.

“I’m not five. I can tie my own laces,” April chuckled

Sterling caressed April’s calf in a way that should be illegal in all 50 states. “Mmhmm.”

April shook her head. “Let’s just get out on the ice, or else.”

“Mmhmm,” Sterling kept humming, making April wonder what it would feel like if Sterling’s lips were pressed against her when she made that sound.

The moment they hit the ice, Sterling’s smirk and teasing hum transformed into a surprised yelp followed by a matching look as she almost immediately lost control and ended up nearly doing the splits on the ice, arms aloft as she tried to regain her balance..

“I remember you being not bad at skating,” April laughed.

“That was then. We were younger. I was shorter and my center of gravity closer to the ground,” Sterling said as she wobbled unsafely.

“It’s easy, Sterl, just watch.” April pushed off and picked up some speed, somehow seamlessly transitioning from skating away from Sterling, with her back turned, to gracefully gliding backwards, a teasing smile as she looked at her unsteady girlfriend and motioned her to come join her.

Sterling clung to the railing, shaking her head.

April cut an arc and aimed herself towards Sterling, slowing down, barely moving forward when she reached out and offered her hand to her girlfriend. “Skate with me, please?”

“Don’t let me fall.”

“Never, I promise.” April tugged experimentally and smiled when she saw Sterling let go and start gliding across the ice. She swizzled lazily and felt a tug again, this time because Sterling was falling behind. “Keep up, slowpoke. Work those legs. I know you know how to.”

Sterling whined, “Not on ice. Not even when wearing skates.”

Laughing, April shed some speed and moments later Sterling bumped into her back. “Hey you, I understand you’re in need of some support?”

Sterling grabbed a hold of April’s waist and pulled her close. “You’re all I need.”

“Mmhmm.” April leaned back slightly, enjoying Sterling cuddling close to her, before she picked up some speed. “Hang on tight, honey. Here we go.”

They exited onto the straight section and April laughed when she heard Sterling’s excited whooping. “Isn’t this fun?” she said. “It’s not like flying free like a bird, but the sensation of effortlessly gliding along with the wind in your face… It’s close.”

She was surprised when she felt Sterling let go, so she twisted around, skating backwards to check on her girlfriend. Sterling was trying to undo the zipper on her puffy jacket for some reason, and once she managed it, she jammed her hands into the pockets and spread her arms wide as she leaned forward. 

“Look, babe!” Sterling exclaimed. “Look at me, I’m a big, orange squirrel flying above the ice!”

April’s delighted laugh was cut short when Sterling failed to realize there was a turn coming up and took a tumble, but when Sterling’s frustrated face emerged all red and embarrassed from within the bundle of fabric, April started laughing again and pulled out her phone to take a picture of her ridiculous, and thankfully unharmed, girlfriend.

“Stop taking pictures and help me!” Sterling huffed. “I might be hurt. You don’t know that.”

Shaking her head, April skated up to Sterling and stopped, once again reaching out and offering her hand. “You’re fine, Sterl. That jacket of yours is puffy enough to protect you from anything short of a bullet.”

Sterling glared and grabbed April’s hand, yanking hard. “Then it should protect me from you falling on me!”

They both laughed, rolling around on the ice. “Aren’t you cold, babe?”

“I could stand to be warmer,” April agreed with an eager nod..

Sterling smiled and wrapped her arms around April, completely enveloping her in orange puffiness and hugged her tightly.

April cuddled into Sterling’s embrace and was about to kiss her gorgeous lips when she stopped herself, looking around, embarrassed at their display. “Maybe this is the end of today’s skating lesson?” she laughed softly and kissed Sterling, on the tip of her cute nose.

********

* * *

“My feet hurt.” 

********

“Are you sure it’s just your feet? You did land _pretty_ hard.” 

********

Sterling turned her head slightly shooting April an evil look. She could see the amused closed mouthed smile playing on April’s lips and didn’t fail to notice the way she refused to meet Sterling’s glare. Instead, she tightened her grip on Sterling’s hand and leaned into her side as they walked away from the ice skating rink. 

********

“Where to?” April asked, finally glancing over at Sterling. She released a short, breathy laugh at the unhappy expression on her girlfriend’s face. She raised her free hand and tenderly tapped Sterling’s chin. “No pouting. We’re on a date.” 

********

Sterling continued to pout. “You made fun of me.” 

********

“No, I didn’t.” April halted their stroll tugging Sterling, so they were fully facing each other. “I was teasing you.” She took a step forward closing some of the space between them. There was a seductive twinkle in her eyes. “I thought you liked that?” 

********

Sterling narrowed her eyes skeptically. “Normally, I do-“ 

********

“But?” 

********

“But this time I busted my butt in front of you. That’s embarrassing.” 

********

“It was cute.” 

********

Sterling sucked her teeth then rolled her eyes in disbelief. “That was far from cute.” 

********

“Everything you do is cute,” April assured her as she inched upward and placed a soft, lingering kiss on her lips. She broke the kiss slowly then met Sterling’s eyes. “I’m sorry. I won’t tease you about your lack of skating skills anymore.” 

********

“That’s all I ask.” Sterling chuckled softly giving her another quick kiss. She brushed her nose against April’s smiling when her girlfriend released a tiny giggle. “How does dinner sound?” 

********

“Dinner sounds wonderful.” April tugged excitedly on her hand. “Oh, let’s try that poke place.” 

********

Sterling scrunched her nose unsure. “I’m not really a big fan of sushi, babe.” She tilted her head twisting her mouth pensively. “There’s a joke in there somewhere. One that I would make if I was fourteen… and a guy." She huffed a laugh when April rolled her eyes. "But I know better" 

********

“Yes you do.” April rocked their joined hands together. “But, come on. Let’s go to Poke Bar. Step outside your box of Debbie’s cooking and whatever your father shot over the weekend.” April flashed her most charming grin. “Trust me. You’ll like it.” 

********

“I don’t know, babe…” 

********

“Please? For me?” 

********

Sterling locked eyes with April watching as a pout pulled across her lips. She tried to resist and not give into the sudden adorableness her girlfriend was projecting. She lasted a total of two seconds. “Fine,” she sighed. “We’ll go to Poke Bar.” 

********

April squealed enthusiastically as she gave her another quick kiss then hurriedly pulled her in the direction of the restaurant. 

********

They ordered their food and decided to sit outside and enjoy the Christmas décor surrounding Atlantic Station. April took it upon herself to steal some of Sterling’s food. It wasn’t long after the thievery that she decided feeding Sterling was just as much fun as taking what she had. They shared a laugh when April purposely missed and caused the food to tumble from Sterling’s mouth. She scrambled to catch the salmon but was completely unsuccessful. 

********

“I still can’t believe you don’t like Christmas music,” Sterling commented, taking a sip from her drink. 

********

April winkled her nose as she pushed her food around inside her bowl. “It’s not that I hate it or anything.” She shrugged. “I just don’t exactly _love_ Christmas music.” 

********

“Well, I’m going to have to figure out a way to change that,” Sterling noted, scooping up another bit of her food. 

********

April snorted, gathering a bite of her own. “Good luck with that.” 

********

“I’m not too worried. I’ve been able to change your mind on things before.” She winked at her girlfriend then took another bite making a satisfied noise. 

********

April smiled at the sound. “Good?” 

********

“Mmhmm.” Sterling nodded. 

********

“I guess we both have the power to change each other’s mind on things.” 

********

Sterling smiled, that dorky smile that made April’s stomach feel like a thousand butterflies had been released all at once. “I guess so.” 

********

April reached across their small table and took Sterling’s free hand in her own. “I had a really great time tonight. It’s nice to just spend time alone together.” 

********

“It is,” Sterling agreed, brushing her thumb softly against the back of her hand. “We need to do this more often.” 

********

”We will.” April shifted closer, pressing a small kiss to the back of her girlfriend’s hand. “Because we have all the time in the world.”

********


	22. "Wrapping Paper"

Sterling thought it was odd when Blair told her she was going shopping with Ezequiel and Hannah B. Maybe odd wasn’t the exact way to describe her reaction. Surprised. Surprised was more fitting. It wasn’t until the duo showed up at the Wesley home that Sterling realized what was really going on. The Trinity arrived at her home early that morning. Not just Ezequiel and Hannah B. 

The Trinity. April surprisingly included. 

“What are you doing here?” Sterling asked, happy as she ushered them all inside the house. 

April held up her hands. She was carrying a few bags filled with various items. “I thought since they were going shopping, we could have a wrapping party.” 

Sterling helped her girlfriend taking a few bags from her hand. “Just us?” Her eyes brightened hopefully, and she pressed her teeth into her bottom lip in a lame attempt to control her excitement. 

“Yup just you two,” Blair stated, walking up to the other two as she put the strap of her bag over her shoulder. She half rolled her eyes. “I felt a little guilty about the sugar rush rollercoaster I’ve been on the last couple of days-“ 

The couple looked at her pointedly. 

Blair ignored their looks and continued. “So, I asked Z and Hannah if they wanted to do some last minute consumer bullshit.” 

“Language,” Sterling muttered, halfheartedly. Her sister had arranged such a sweet thing, she didn’t have the heart to truly scold her. 

“Listen, can we please drop the Z? I am not a rapper from Atlanta,” Ezequiel requested, sassily. 

Blair thought for a moment then shook her head. “No, we’re keeping it.” 

“Yeah, I kinda like it!” Hannah B added, earning an eye roll from Ezequiel. 

Blair looked at Sterling instantly regretting her plans. “Alright, I already sent a text to mom. Dad is out back doing-“ She scrunched her brow, waving her hand. “-something so you two have the house for _about_ five hours.” 

“Are you seriously going to be gone that long?” Sterling questioned stunned. 

“Girl, it’s three days before Christmas,” Ezequiel noted, waving his hand dismissively. “Answer your own question.” 

Blair laughed as they waved goodbye to the couple and exited the house. 

Sterling turned to April excitedly giving her a kiss. “Okay, I’ll get us set up in the family room and then run upstairs to grab my gifts.” 

“Do you want me to grab drinks and snacks from the kitchen?” April offered, following her girlfriend toward the family room. 

“That would be amazing.” Sterling halted her steps and April did as well. She took a step closer leaving a minimal amount of space between them. “I’m so glad you’re here.” 

April beamed up at her. “So am I.” 

They shared a quick kiss and made their way to the family room to set up… 

* * *

After saying their goodbyes, stepping outside and closing the front door Ezequiel was the first to speak. It took a whole five seconds for him to question the way this day was evolving.

“Are we really going shopping?” he asked, regarding Blair suspiciously.

Blair scoffed, haughtily. “What else could this possibly be for?”

“It’ll be fun, no matter,” Hannah B. said. “We never get to hang out without April and/or Sterling around. Now we’ll be able to live our true lives.”

“Is there something you want to tell us, Hannah B.?”

“No. What? Was I supposed to tell you something?”

Blair laughed and gave Hannah B. a noogie. “You’re precious, never change.”

“Is there something _you_ want to tell us, Evil Twin?”

“In fact, _Zeke,_ there is,” Blair took a deep breath, “my name is Blair. You know it is, so use it.”

“So? My name isn’t Zeke either.”

“Look, we’re not doing this standing out in the driveway. Let’s get into Rudolphina and go shopping first. Let us embrace Christmas!” Blair flashed the Holy Duo a smile as fake as the antlers attached to the Volt.

When they approached the Volt, Hannah B. was the first to notice the antlers and she squealed delightedly. “You named your car Rudolphina because she’s a reindeer? Oh! There’s even a red nose!”

Blair nodded. “But Sterling insists on calling her Rudolph, as if all cars are masculine machines.”

“You still agree that they are _machines_ right, not persons, of either gender,” Ezequiel queried, astonished at what silly things the twins got into disagreements about.

Blair ignored him. “It’s probably due to the combustion engines. You know, loud, noisy, and stinky. Much like most men.”

“Won’t hear me disagree,” he scoffed.

“Rudolphina isn’t like that. She’s silent, caring and makes me feel safe.”

“Unlike the people around you when you’re at the wheel.”

“The Volt is a hybrid, right?” asked Hannah B.

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Then maybe they is more appropriate. Because they are neither her nor him. Or both at the same time.”

“Somebody got a head start on their reading for Queer Theory class,” Ezequiel said, chuckling.

“I think I like that,” Blair said, pondering what the genderneutral variant of Rudolph would be. “Get in, and they will take us safely to our destination.”

“Which is?” 

“Told you, we’re going shopping.”

“But _where_?” Ezequiel insisted, refusing to let Blair ignore him, but when she closed the door on him and gestured he’d better get in too or be left standing there, he relented.

Five minutes later, a drive undertaken in absolute silence as Blair refused to look anywhere other than at the road straight in front of her, she made a left turn, despite signs reading Lenox Square pointing right.

“This isn’t the way to the mall,” Ezequiel said, suspicion still intact.

“I never said anything about the mall,” Blair sighed and turned to Hannah B. “You back me up on this, I never mentioned the mall.”

Hannah B’s eyes went wide.

“What?” Blair asked before recognizing that the terror on Hannah B’s face might have something to do with her seeing the driver of the car having her back turned to the road and not really paying too much attention to where she was going. She sat back down and apologized, returning her hands to 10 and 2 on the steering wheel. “Sorry, I wasn’t thinking.”

“Clearly,” Ezequiel snorted, trying to disguise his rising panic. Evil Twin being a bad driver was a known fact, but even he didn’t expect this.

“I-I’ve had a lot on my mind lately. It’s been hard to keep focus.”

“If you don’t tell me where you’re taking us, I’m texting April to tell her we’ve been kidnapped, _Blair_.”

“Hey, you remembered my name. And used it correctly in a sentence,” she forced a laugh, hoping Ezequiel would play along. “Maybe there’s hope for you still, Ezequiel.”

“Do you want me to spell it too?”

“What?” 

“Isn’t this part of the audition for Spelling Bee?”

“If they actually asked you to spell your own name, I might’ve participated.”

“It was pretty fun actually,” Hannah B. added from the back seat. “I got eliminated on ‘exterminate’ though. Because I was busy saying it like those amusing trash cans with plungers for weapons do. EX-TERM-I-NATE. They’re funny.”

Ezequiel nodded. “I agree, Hannah B., I agree. The only reason those things are a threat because you’re too busy laughing to find some stairs where you could _safely_ laugh at them being unable to climb them.”

“What on God’s green earth are you two talking about?” Blair said, laughing at Hannah B. continuing to do her impression long after it stopped being cute..

“Some science fiction show we used to watch on PBS with April. It was… not good.”

Blair jumped for joy. “Stevens watches stuff that isn’t Star Wars? Oh, this is gold.”

The mood for the remainder of the drive, which was just a few minutes anyway, was lighter, and when they pulled into the parking lot of a non-chain coffee shop, Blair told them to get out of her car pronto, but with a happy chuckle.

“This still isn’t shopping,” Ezequiel pointed out.

“It’s a coffee _shop_.”

“Where people drink coffee and—” he eyed Blair “—get high on sugary confectionery.”

“It’s a kind of shopping. We’re shopping for food.”

“Girl, you’re reaching, and you know it.”

Hannah B. nodded intently. “Blair, why don’t you just tell us what we’re doing here.”

“We’re getting coffee and sitting down like grown-ass adults to talk.”

“You kidnapped us to have a conversation? This better be some conversation.”

“Why can’t we just hang?”

“We don’t _hang._ ”

“I know,” Blair felt her frustration growing. “Okay, so maybe I got some news and I need to talk to someone. Who isn’t Sterling.”

Hannah B. took Blair by the hand and started them towards the counter. “What do you want? Latte? Americano?”

“Frappe.”

Ezequiel’s outburst of _I KNEW IT!_ was loud enough to be heard by everybody inside the building and probably a few outside in the parking lot. He gave off a quick apologetic wave before he made sure Hannah B. would get his order as well and set out to find them some comfortable seats..

Sitting down, Blair said, “I promise, we are actually going shopping. I still need to get the last few gifts. I just thought, it’d be nice for April and Sterling to have some time to themselves. And for us, to hang as, you know, friends.”

“We’re friends?” Ezequiel snarked, but without the usual bite.

“Ezequiel! Be nice. Of course we’re your friends, and we can hang if that’s all you want to do,” Hannah B. comforted a clearly uncomfortable Blair, “but you said you had news. Is it bad?”

“The opposite. I’ll probably attend UCLA next year. Full scholarship.”

“Weird, April’s not mentioned anything about Sterling or her going to UCLA. And you can’t separate the two of them even with a crowbar.”

“Sterling’s not going. They already have everything planned out.”

“But that means—”

“That means the conjoined twins will finally be separated.” Blair smiled sadly. “And we know how successful that procedure usually is.”

Hannah B. looked at Blair and nodded before placing her hand over Blair’s “You’ll be fine, sweetie. You kick ass seven days a week already.”

Ezequiel joined in, backing Hannah B. up. "Despite how bizarrely and often upsettingly close—"

“Wow, I can’t believe April actually went around saying that about Sterling and me. I so wanted to kick her tiny ass when Sterl told me about it. She’s lucky I like her now,” Blair did an involuntary shudder when she admitted that.

“You do? The way you constantly jab at her, that's hard to believe.”

“Ezequiel, please. You if anyone should recognize affectionate banter and barbs laced with love. You’ve practically turned it into an art form.”

“And occasional murder weapon.”

“That too. Which is why it’s weird I’m talking to you two about this. Only Sterling knows about UCLA so far. I guess I didn’t want to bring it up with my parents until it’s official. But what I’m about to tell you, I didn’t even tell Sterling.”

“Oooh, tea!” Hannah B. lit up.

Ezequiel just sighed and shook his head. “No, this is our friend, choosing to confide in us. It’s not something for you to spill.”

“I’m sorry, Blair,” Hannah B. said, looking contrite. “We won’t tell a soul.”

Blair steeled herself. She wasn’t about to expose some deep dark secret, or even something that would be all that surprising to Ezequiel and Hannah B., or indeed any of her fellow students. What she was to say was more for herself, so she could reconcile feeling like this, when she wanted to be a badass woman (in training) more than anything. “So, like, I know we're all faced with big changes coming sooner than we might want them to. And it's okay to be nervous. But I'm more than just nervous. I'm scared, like actually scared. All my life I've had Sterling. And at times I've resented her, because I'm not Sterling. I'm not pure and good. I'm the—" she looked over at Ezequiel "—Evil Twin, prickly and disagreeable."

“Blair, no, you’re not—” Hannah B. started before being interrupted.

“I am,” Blair stated. “Maybe I rather stir things up so life feels bad because of my actions, rather than… just life _feeling_ bad. But that doesn’t mean it always has to be like that, that I always have to act like that.”

“Maybe you should talk to Sterling about this. And your parents,” Hannah B. suggested and Ezequiel agreed. “But until you do, and after too, if you still need us then, we’re here. And we can hang and talk and even shop.”

Blair nodded softly and said a silent pray in thanks of Hannah B.’s good-hearted nature. She shook herself and shrugged her shoulders, feeling a weight being lifted simply by sharing.

"Speaking of shopping...You can tell me, has April gone as overboard as Sterling?" she asked.

Hannah B. and Ezequiel exchanged a glance before she replied, "She made us swear not to tell..."

"Let's just say that if she could, April would've bought the entire contents of the Sharper Image catalogue for Sterling."

"What's Sharper Image?" Blair asked, the reference tickling something in the back of her mind.

"Just something old people thought was cool back in the 1900s."

Hannah B. chimed in: "What's a catalogue?"

* * *

There was something very domestic about wrapping Christmas gifts together. Especially when they’d been working in comfortable silence for almost an hour. The only sounds filling the room was the soft music playing from Sterling’s phone and the soft hum coming from the blinking lights on the Christmas tree. Every now and then, Sterling titled her head back to look at April who was sitting on the couch behind her. April had tried to get her to sit with her on the couch, but Sterling knew, if she did, they wouldn’t get any wrapping done. 

So, she chose to sit crossed legged on the floor. It also helped space out her gifts and make it easier to organize what gifts belonged to who. 

“My mom told me she called Beth about Christmas eve,” Sterling said, finally breaking the silence. She tilted her head back, resting against April’s knee. An adorable smile formed on her lips. “I’m really glad you all are staying over. It’s going to be nice waking up and you being here on Christmas morning.” She turned her head slightly, placing a kiss against April’s knee. “It’s like a bonus present.” 

April smiled back, touching the tip of her nose. “Santa’s being good to us this year.” 

Sterling leaned her head back further to look at her cute upside-down girlfriend. She gave her a toothy grin before puckering her lips into an inviting pout. April couldn’t resist her playful faces and Sterling hoped this look would earn her what she was asking for. She narrowed her eyes and arched an eyebrow. 

April laughed, shaking her head as she leaned down and placed a small kiss against Sterling’s lips. She laced her fingers under Sterling’s chin, her thumbs softly brushing over her girlfriend’s cheeks. When April splayed her fingers across Sterling’s throat before trailing them up her neck until she could tangle them in Sterling’s hair, she was rewarded with a contented hum that turned into a soft whine when they returned to their original positions. 

“That was a tease,” Sterling whined, laughing when April gently shoved the back of her head. 

They went back to their tasks falling into the quiet rhythm of wrapping the gifts for their family. April leaned to the side and picked up the gift she’d purchased for her mother. She hoped her mother would understand the meaning behind her gift. Behind the change that it represented in their lives and their relationship. 

She understood that spending their first Christmas without John should feel weird, but it didn’t. In an odd way, what she was feeling was almost freeing. There was no need to pretend to have the perfect family celebration. No need to wonder if the outfit she was wearing to open presents in the supposed comfort of their own living room was appropriate enough. Perfect enough. 

It was going to feel so nice to wake up, roll out of bed, and spend the morning opening gifts in her pajamas. Especially since she will be spending Christmas with her mom, her girlfriend and the Wesley’s. It wasn’t as if all her Christmas’ growing up were bad, but they weren’t great. They weren’t filled with the same warmth, love and spirt that she felt with her new extended family. 

She mindlessly reached out affectionately threading her fingers through her girlfriend’s soft blonde hair. “Sterl, I honestly can’t thank you enough for making my mom and I part of your family’s Christmas traditions.” She continued her ministrations smiling when Sterling released a soft-hearted hum. 

“You don’t have to thank me, babe,” Sterling assured her, half turning so she was facing April. “You’re part of my family. You both are.” She raised her hand and poked April’s knee. “This is the way.” Another toothy grin crossed her face. 

April shook her head unable to stop herself from mirroring her girlfriend’s smile. “Am I going to regret introducing you to Star Wars?” 

Sterling raised an eyebrow. “You mean you don’t already?” 

She gave Sterling a playful swat then peaked over her at the mess of gifts lying around the floor. “So,” she began, dragging out the last syllable. She raised her eyebrow curiously. “Which one of those is mine?” 

“What? None of them.” Sterling wrinkled her nose and scoffed. “Do you honestly think I’d be that scattered brained that I would bring your gift down here to wrap in front of you?” 

April offered her a pointed look, raising her eyebrow. Her look said it all. 

“Don’t look at me like that.” 

“Are you saying I’m wrong?” 

“No, I’m just saying don’t look at me like that.” Sterling sulked, narrowing her eyes when April laughed. “Look, there might have been a split second when I had run back upstairs because your gift was in the pile, but I caught myself. So at least give me credit for that.” 

“Of course, honey,” April cooed, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. Her hand rested on Sterling’s cheek as she gently brushed her thumb against her skin. “You know I’m just messing with you.” 

Sterling nodded, turning her head slightly to press a small kiss to her wrist. “I know.” 

“And, honesty, I think we’ve both been pretty scatterbrained these last few weeks. With the whole Fellowship party, midterms-“ She looked adorningly into Sterling’s bright blue eyes. “This being our first Christmas together as a couple and wanting it to be perfect.” A faint blush appeared on her cheeks. “And other things.” 

“What other things?” Sterling asked, a half smirk raised on the corner of her mouth. 

“Oh, suddenly Miss One Track Mind doesn’t know what other things are?” 

Sterling laughed, taking April’s hand in her own. “My mind has two tracks.” 

“Really?” April licked her lips trying to relax the ridiculous smile she was certain was filling her features. “What’s on the second track?” 

Sterling pushed herself up, hovering her lips close to April’s. “You,” she whispered, giving her a quick kiss then settling back down. She cocked her head to the side knitting her brow. “Then technically that would put you on both tracks.” 

April shook her head releasing a quiet exhale. “You’re ridiculous.” 

“Knew that was coming.” She kissed April’s hand then turned back to her task with a heavy sigh. “I guess we should get back to wrapping.” 

April peeked passed her. “Is that what you would call what you’re doing?” She pointed down to a gift sitting beside Sterling. The silver wrapping paper was completely uneven and she didn’t even want to get started on the amount of tape haphazardly pasted on every side of the package. “What are you doing to that poor wrapping paper?” 

Sterling picked up the gift and inspected the wrapping. She looked at April, confusion written all over her face. “What’s wrong with it?” 

“Sterl, it looks more like you were trying to do surgery then wrap a present.” April took the gift from her hand and turned it over. A short, astonished laugh escaped her throat. “Honey, you didn’t even wrap both sides.” 

“It’s not so bad,” Sterling stated, dismissively waving her hand. “I’ll just add more tape.” She reached for the gift, but April moved it out of her grasp. Her jaw slacked and a choked noise escaped her. “Babe!” 

“No, you are not going to cause anymore damage to this wrapping paper.” April patted Sterling’s shoulder then waved her hand. “Move over.” 

Sterling scooted to the side and April slid off the couch to join her on the floor. “All I had to do was not wrap something perfectly to get you down here with me?” 

April shot her a scolding look from the side of her eye. She unwrapped the gift discarding the paper off to the side. “Looks like we’re having a gift wrapping lesson instead of a party.” 

Sterling shrugged. “Whatever keeps you closest to me,” she stated, laughing when April gave her a small nudge before reaching for the tube of paper and showing Sterling how to wrap presents correctly…. 


	23. "Tiny Box in a Bunch of Larger Boxes"

“I’m going to do that thing where I put a tiny box in a bunch of larger boxes, but the last box is going to have a ring in it,” Sterling said, excitedly moving her hands around the tiny box containing the ring she got for April sitting on her desk. “I’m thinking maybe three, or four boxes. Last one large enough that she thinks I got her a... a...” 

“A big, empty box? It’ll still be mostly air. She will know something’s up.” 

“Check out the big brain on Blair,” Sterling laughed. “I wonder if I can pick up a paving slab somewhere. That would work, wouldn’t it?” 

Blair just stared at her twin, slack-jawed and dumbfounded. “I’m sorry... what?” 

“To give it some heft. You know—” 

"Nonono, I get it... I'm just trying to figure out why you want your girlfriend to choke you on Christmas?” Blair’s expression changed into something more mischievous. “Behind locked doors, I get, but in front of family?” 

“Gosh, that is _so_ inappropriate. What we do is none of your concern.” 

“Sorry sis, I’ve made it my concern. I can’t believe I got you five hours of private, prime boning time, and you actually wrapped presents and maybe made out? Tell me you at least made out.” 

“In our defense, it was a lot of presents.” Sterling played with her nails nervously. “And mom and dad got home before anything could happen. Good thing nothing did happen. Mom walked in just as I was trying to wrap April up so I could put her under the tree.” 

Blair laughed uproariously. “Only you would bother putting her under the tree first instead of straight into your bed.” 

“It’s not funny.” Sterling pouted and glared at Blair until a smile started to sneak onto her face. “Okay, maybe it’s a little funny.” 

Blair snorted a laugh. “I bet you wouldn’t even have to lay her down under the tree. She could probably stand straight up and fit under perfectly.” 

Sterling gave her sister an offended look. “Don’t make fun of her height.” 

“Her height is all I have left, don’t take that from me too.” Blair flopped onto Sterling’s bed, landing on her back. She sighed, resting her hands on her stomach as she stared up at the ceiling. “I should hear something from UCLA after the New Year.” 

Sterling stood from her desk chair and walked over to her bed. She sat down beside Blair giving her arm a concerned tap. “Are you nervous?” 

Blair twisted her mouth as she mulled over her response. “I wouldn’t say nervous more like… scared.” 

Sterling looked taken back by her twin’s answer. “Scared? You?” 

“Yeah, Sterl…” Blair propped herself up on her elbows. “This is going to be a big change for me. I mean, I have no doubts that I’m going to do awesome because, well, it’s me-“ 

“True,” Sterling said, a small supportive smile on her lips. 

“But I’m going to be halfway across the country. Away from mom, dad… you.” She shifted pulling herself into an upright position. “Like, what if I can’t make it on my own? What if I get lost on campus or I run out of money? What if I make no friends? Like, if I become one of those hermits who studies in a dark corner of the school library and mumbles to themselves about the good old days.” 

“That will never happen,” Sterling stated confidently. “I always saw you turning into a conspiracy freak, ranting on a street corner about Big Tech and the suck of the Zuck.” 

Blair gave her twin a playful shove. “Telling the truth does not make one into conspiracy freak. And are you going to tell me Zuckerberg isn’t the worst?” 

“The man does not like nipples. I cannot support that.” 

“Nipples? That’s what you chose to cherry pick from the litany of reasons that exist for not being on Facebook or using their products?” She grinned and stared her sister down, just waiting for that blush she knew was coming. “I think your one-track mind has narrowed even further.” 

“Shut up. And stop trying to deflect.” 

“You brought the nipples into play.” 

"Nipples are not in play—part of this discussion, I mean—you know what I mean," Sterling spluttered, clearly flustered and finally blushing like Blair knew she would be. 

Blair laughed and let Sterling off the hook. “It’s okay, I’m only messing with you. April makes you happy and that’s all I need to know.” 

“Thank you,” Sterling let out a deep breath and leaned into her sister. “UCLA is going to be great; you know that.” 

“I do, but I still wish that I had—” Blair stopped herself, making a face. 

Sterling regarded Blair curiously, wondering what had made her stop like that. “What?” 

Blair stuck her tongue out, like she accidentally tasted something foul. “I nearly said I wish I had, ugh, I can’t believe I’m going to say this—“ Blair pulled her knees to her chest and buried her face between her arms “—I wish I had an April of my own.” 

“You do?” 

“Of course I do! Not an April-April. Small and bossy is not for me. Nor girls. But going out there would be so much easier if I had someone standing beside me, loving and supporting me like April do you, and you her. I’d be a fool if some part of me didn’t want that.” 

“You’ll have that, sis, I know you will. Maybe it hasn’t happened yet for a reason because you have to find _your_ April.” 

“Can we not talk about my hypothetical soulmate as an April anything anymore. Putting it like that, I do regret.” 

Sterling smiled and curled up next to Blair. “Just know that until you find that... _special someone_ —” a phrase which was met by gagging noises from Blair, despite what she just revealed “—you have me, and I’ll always stand by you.” 

“I was right, you know, love _has_ made you cheesy.” Blair laughed and started crawling out of Sterling’s bed. “So before you turn into complete mush and I get it all over me, I’m going to go finish wrapping my own presents. Yours is pretty big. I had to get a few extra rolls of wrapping paper, so it’s going to take a while. No peeking.” 

Sterling nodded. “Thanks for telling me all this. I know it couldn’t have been easy.” 

“I appreciate you hearing me out. I got both warm ‘n fuzzy feelings and some good advice. I would’ve hated myself if I kept this from you any longer.” 

“No more secrets. That’s what we agreed on. Looks like the Holy Duo came through big time.” 

Blair smiled fondly. “Yeah, they did.” 

“Speaking of, did you get April anything? I don’t think she’s expecting anything, so it’s okay—” 

Blair scoffed and rolled her eyes. “What kind of future sister-in-law would I be if I omitted her from such an important part of Christmas? Of course I got her something. In fact, I picked something up yesterday, but it’s a surprise…” 

Before Sterling realized what the implication might mean, Blair was halfway back to her own room. 

“What is it, Blair? Please tell me. Blair?!” Sterling glanced over at the cupboard where she stashed the package Blair had called a “couples gift”. She sprinted across the bathroom and stood before Blair’s closed door. "Blair, _please_ don't embarrass her on Christmas!" 

* * *

“Mom, I found the movie! It took going through every service we subscribe to, but I found it.” 

“Okay, sweetie, I’ll be right there!” 

April settled on the couch, sinking into its soft plushness before tucking her legs underneath her. She’d been looking forward to this night. It was the first time in a long time that the atmosphere around the Stevens’ home was tranquil during the holidays. Usually around this time, her mother would be rushing around making sure that everything was ready for their Christmas eve party while her father sat on the couch, smoking cigars and drinking some whiskey older than his own daughter. 

Which was disgusting on all accounts as far as April was concerned. 

The family room would always smell of smoke and liquor after he was done. Once he had downed a drink or three, he would sometimes disappear for hours and never even bother to explain his whereabouts. If he did bother to stick around and partake in family time, he would either make her mother’s life hell by telling her everything she was planning was wrong or not good enough. Then when he was done with her, he would move onto April. Forcing her to spend quality time with him and listen to his nonsensical ramblings about religion and the importance of family values. 

April scoffed at the memory as she cued up the movie she and her mother would make their new family tradition. The purposed of this whole night, besides spending time with her mother, was to create new memories and new traditions. Things outside of what she would share with Sterling and her family. Something that was just for them. 

“I got one of those fancy hot chocolate bombs everyone keeps bragging about,” her mother stated, walking into the family room. She carefully balance two mugs of warm milk on a tray. Beside them were two medium sized chocolate snowmen. She slowly set the tray down on the coffee table. “I thought we could drop them in together.” 

April smiled up at her mother scooting over to make room. “That sounds wonderful.” She untucked her legs and sat up straighter, peeking into the cup. “Regular hot chocolate right?” She cocked her head to the side looking at her mother curiously. 

“Yes, of course.” She took a seat beside her daughter. “I heard there are little marshmallows on the inside of the snowman’s belly that come out when he melts.” 

“Oh, that’s should be interesting.” April picked up the chocolate snowman from the tray. “So, we just drop this in the milk?” 

“Don’t you have one of those tick-tock accounts? That’s where I heard about it.” 

April gasped, teasingly. “You’ve been on TikTok?” 

Beth made a dismissive noise and waved her hand. “No, no. Janet Bailey’s daughter, Gwen, showed me a video when I was discussing fun things to do for Christmas.” She smiled warmly at April, giving her a tiny nudge. “You said you wanted to make new traditions so,“ she motioned toward the cups, “here’s one of many.” 

April’s heart swelled at the effort her mother was making. Although the thought of her mother being aware of an app that even April barely used was a little unnerving. With the amount of posting Blair and Sterling did, Lord knows what her mother would discover about her girlfriend had she stumbled upon their accounts. 

“Gwen showed me so many fun food things that I did end up downloading it myself though. If I can figure out how to set it up, she promised me she would send a list of accounts to follow.” 

April nearly crushed her chocolate snowman, but she managed to smile at her mom, hiding how the knowledge that soon her sweet mother would be browsing through videos that included some of her girlfriend and her sister doing things that no adult family member should be aware of made her sweat. 

Still smiling, she held up her still intact snowman, holding it above the cup and waited patiently for her mom to do the same. They dropped the snowmen into the liquid simultaneously. The chocolate melted, releasing the cocoa powder and marshmallows turning the warm milk brown and deliciously gooey. They excitedly gushed over the drink as Beth handed her daughter a spoon so they could combine the flavors. 

“What movie did you pick?” Beth asked, tapping her spoon against the edge of her cup. 

“White Christmas,” April replied, removing her spoon and placing the utensil backdown on the tray. She tucked her legs underneath herself again as she settled into the cushion with her mug. “Its one of my favorite Christmas movies.” 

Beth knitted her brow. “I had no idea.” 

“Yeah, I used to watch it upstairs in my room on my laptop when you and John were asleep.” She blew into her mug cooling the liquid a tiny bit. “I’m glad I can actually watch it with you this year.” 

“Me too, sweetie.” Beth held her mug up and tapped it against April’s. “To new memories.” 

April grinned, raising her cup. “To new memories.” 

They both took a sip from their drinks and released a satisfied moan. 

“That is delicious.” 

“Nice to know Gwen Bailey is capable of doing something correctly.” 

Beth slapped her knee playfully scolding her. “Be nice.” 

April chuckled, raising her free hand defensively. “Sorry. You’re right. Good will toward man and all that.” 

“Hit that button already, sweetie, I can’t wait to find out what your favorite Christmas movie is like.” 

“One of,” April corrected before starting the movie, but made sure not to mention any other titles. 

When the opening titles rolled, April looked over at her mom, eager to see her reaction. Beth looked back and gave her daughter a smile as she patted her shoulder. “I’m sure I’ll love it, sweetie. You have such refined tastes.” 

Returning her attention to the screen, Beth settled back into the couch. April saw her mom relax, but when the first scene started up, she began to frown. “Are you sure this is a Christmas movie? I’m not really interested in war.” 

April laughed. “Don’t worry, it’s just at the very beginning. You’ll see, it’s a Christmas movie alright.” 

Calmed by her daughter’s assurance, Beth’s frown eased up. “If you say so. I trust you.” 

During a lull in the movie, Beth leaned over to April and said, “This is nice. Definitely something worth turning into a tradition.” 

“I agree. It’s definitely more like the Christmas I always hoped for.” 

Beth nodded. “Christmas should be a time for family, which is why I’m so glad that the Wesleys invited us both to spend it with them. They have been so lovely.” 

“Are you sure it’s not because it means you don’t have to spend most of the day in the kitchen?” April teased. 

April’s mom poked her lightly. “I will gladly cook the biggest Christmas meal for you, sweetie, and whomever you want to invite.” Beth laughed. “But I will admit it’s nice being allowed to relax for Christmas for once and let everybody else deal with the stress.” 

“Maybe next year we’ll return the favor?” 

“If you and Sterling isn’t busy hosting Christmas for your friends and creating your own traditions, I would love to, if you’re sure you really want to spend Christmas with your embarrassing mother rather than snuggling on the couch with Sterling.” 

“Mom!” April felt embarrassed, not due of her mom’s teasing suggestion, but because of how intensely happy she felt when thinking of the life she wanted to build with Sterling. “There will _always_ be room for you in my life, be it Christmas or any other time of year. 

“Yes, hopefully someday Sterling and I can open up our home to friends and family, and perhaps that will become our new tradition. But you will be there with us, as will Anderson and Debbie, I’m sure,” she said before reaching out to touch her mother’s cheek. “I know I’ve said this before, but I don’t think I can it enough: I love you, mom. I’ve been blessed with one supportive parent, which is more than many have, unfortunately. And your love and support is more than enough to outweigh whatever... anything... _him.”_

“Oh, sweetie,” Beth put her hand over April’s and pulled her into a sobbing embrace. “The woman you’re growing up to be is the best present a mother could ever wish for. It’s all I hope for during all those years when my weakness—” 

“Mom, no,” April said firmly. “Never apologize or take on responsibility for him and what he did.” 

“But I—” 

“No. I won’t let you. Not now, not ever. This, what we’re doing now, making new memories and forging new traditions as we’re finally able to live our own lives, that is what we focus on. Not him. Not now, not ever.” She tried to hug as much of her mom as possible at once, as if she could transfer the conviction she felt to her mother in this way. 

Beth held April close, brushing her hand over her daughter’s hair. “You’re absolutely right, April. I should let the past be the past. We have the future ahead of us. I have you and you’ve got me. And Sterling too, that girl is not going to let go any time soon. Gosh, talk about a bright future with her wrapped around you.” 

“Mom!” This is April’s blush was due to her mom’s teasing. “We really should be watching the movie. It’s a good one. And I might quiz you next year to make sure the traditions are taking hold.” 

Beth laughed. “I think I can manage a passing grade. And if I fail, I know the professor and might see if they won’t take kindly to me.” 

“I don’t _take kindly_ to that kind of emotional manipulation... normally, but I’ll make an exception for you, mom,” April said and let go of her mom for long enough to settle into a comfortable position, snuggled against her. 

“They sure knew how to sing and dance back then. Why don’t they make movies like this anymore?” Beth asked, smiling fondly at the way her daughter looked so comfortable curled up on the couch next to her. 

“Because the average American is a cretin who laugh at fart jokes and bodily fluids,” April scoffed. 

“Can’t argue with that and even if I wanted to, the debate trophies tell me I would lose.” 

“You’d better believe it, mom,” April laughed and watched as Danny Kaye and Vera-Ellen danced across the bridge to Novello’s. 

* * *

“Should we call Blair?” 

“Seriously, is there something you need to tell me?” 

“Zeke, stop it.” Hannah B. “Not everybody is gay. Or needs to be.” 

“Not even just a little bit?” 

“We’ve not even graduated high school yet. Let me live.” 

Ezequiel laughed, “Never let April tell you TikTok can’t be educational.” 

“But should we call her? I kinda want to check up on her after yesterday.” 

“Maybe send a text? You’re friends now and friends text.” 

“And FaceTime.” 

“Yes, Hannah B. friends do FaceTime as well as text.” Ezequiel nodded, not exactly patiently. “But not everybody has to be included in every call.” 

Hannah B. nodded like she agreed, but made it clear how annoyed she was when she started speaking. “Blair is more like April than you want to admit it. They both spent so much time pretending nothing bothered them. We were there for April, and now I think we should be there for Blair too.” 

“What got into you? Girl, what would you call yesterday then? She drove off with us under false pretenses and we _still_ workshopped the things she needed to say to Sterling until it was a speech worthy of a Willingham valedictorian.” He snorted and looked off screen. 

“And that’s why I want to check in. Being a friend is not a one-time engagement. It’s commitment and that means being there and sticking around.” 

Ezequiel studied his friend closely. When April came out and started her journey towards the person she was today, it had changed the dynamic of their group. Sometimes, he forgot how much things had changed. 

“Did I say something wrong, Ezequiel? Please say something, you’re freaking me out.” 

“Deep breaths, Han.” Ezequiel tried to smile reassuringly. “I’m sorry. I guess I’m still adjusting to the new normal. You shouldn’t feel like you’re not allowed to talk. You deserve a voice.” 

“Thanks—” 

“Do _not_ call me Zeke. Cute nicknames are nothing something I accept.” He let the curt tone drop. “At least not for me, Han.” 

“Stop doing that! You switch back and forth so quickly! It’s distressing and disorienting.” 

“Just remember, always remember, that I always love you. You’re my best friend.” 

Hannah jumped a little when April’s call came in. “Speaking of—” 

“She’s not the devil, Han.” 

“I was going to say our other best friend. Add her, yeah?” 

“Of course,” Ezequiel stated warmly. 

“Hi April!” Hannah waved cheerfully when April’s face appeared. “Is everything okay?” 

“Better than okay,” April nodded. “Things just got emotional with mom. Thing with new traditions is that sometimes they dredge up old things. But we’re great.” 

“I love your mom, sometimes I—” 

“Hang on, Han. Sterling just texted.” 

Ezequiel rolled his eyes. “Here we go. Like, we might as well start the countdown right now. 3-2-1.” 

“Sorry, guys, gotta go. Bye.” 

“Rude, she didn’t even let me get a lewd remark in before hanging up.” 

“Let her live. They’re young and in love.” 

Ezequiel scoffed. “I just hope they realize that phones have cameras now and that 'show don't tell' applies to more than storytelling.” 

“I’m sure they know about the cameras, Ezequiel, they FaceTime every night.” 

“Exactly.” 

“Oh,” Hannah said, making a shocked face shortly thereafter: “OH!” 


	24. "Nutcracker"

Blair😈   
Can you please hurry up and get down here?! April and I are being tortured. 

Blair😈   
Are you seriously going to leave the love of your life and your girlfriend alone with old people?? 

Sterling rolled her eyes and tossed her phone onto the bed. Leave it to Blair to find a way to be overdramatic on Christmas Eve. As excited as she was to get downstairs and snuggle with her girlfriend while watching Christmas movies, she had to make sure she looked not only comfortable but cute. She wanted everything about this night to be memorable and it all started with her outfit. 

And, as much as she wanted to wear her new pajama set, she had a strong feeling her mother would disapprove since they hadn’t even had dinner yet. It definitely wasn’t pajama time. Not yet anyway. 

She chose the hoodie Blair bought for her for her birthday. A baggy black one with the words “Chaotic Cute” in large print on the front of the hoodie. The graffiti design and color blend was not normally something she would chose for herself, but it worked. Especially the drip of colors which perfectly represented the bisexual flag. A half smile curled at the corner of her mouth at her sisters subtly. 

Her phone vibrated again. And again. And again. Sterling exhaled heavily as she turned and walked back to her bed. She picked up her phone and began swiping through the succession of messages from her sister. 

Blair😈   
Get down here plz 

Blair😈   
Sterling!! 

Blair😈   
Seriously, you're going to ignore my plight? 

Sterling was just about to respond when another text from her twin came through 

Blair😈   
April's mom is three seconds away from getting our mom on TikTok! 🚨SOS 🚨 

Sterling was positive she’d never run out of her room and down the stairs faster. She took a chance jumping over the final two steps. Luckily, she was able to maintain her balance instead of allowing the slickness of her socks and the tile floor causing her to become part of the wall. She skidded into the family room, sliding to a halt right as she flailed her arms to keep herself upright. Blair and April turned to her at the same time. The welcoming smile pulled onto April’s face immediately. Her sister, on the other hand, looked completely shell shocked. 

“So, this is where I found the recipe for the dessert I brought today,” Beth said, sitting close beside Debbie as the other woman looked intently at the video. “If you like enough of them they start to show up on your-“ She flashed April a questioning look. “What’s it called, sweetie? My for you page?” 

April rolled her lips and pressed her mouth tightly closed to keep from laughing. She nodded. “Mmhmm. That’s correct, mom.” 

“Uh, hey, hi, sorry I took so long,” Sterling said, announcing her presence. She fidgeted with her hands as she stepped further into the living room. “What, uh, what’s going on?” 

Blair scooted over making room for Sterling to sit between herself and April. “Mom and Mrs. Stevens-“ 

“Beth, honey. Call me Beth.” She looked around, smiling. “We’re all family here.” 

Debbie patted her thigh with a loving smile of her own. “Yes, we are.” 

Blair took in a deep breath followed by a long exhale. “Beth,” she corrected, turning to look at her sister. Her eyes were wide. “Is showing mom _all_ about TikTok.” 

“ _You need to stop them,”_ Blair said, utilizing her twin telepathy. 

Sterling’s blue eyes widened. “ _You’ve been down here the whole time! Why didn’t you step in?”_

“ _Do you have any idea how hard it is to get two people to listen when they’re sucked into videos about howling huskies and food recipes? News flash! Extremely hard!”_

“ _Oh my God… what if they find lesbian tik tok?”_

“ _Did you put up that video of you using the sound where you ask if it’s kissing time? Cause that video was awesome and April looked annoyed but, like, lovingly annoyed…”_

“Hey, would you two mind being present?” April whispered, harshly as she leaned over Sterling. “I’m sure they haven’t come across your horrible dancing videos yet so if we just distract them, we can end this.” 

The Twins snapped from their private conversation and nodded. 

Blair looked at the women. “Hey, mom. Dad should be back soon. Maybe we should get started on dinner.” 

Debbie glanced at her watch, surprised at the late hour. “Oh, baby, you’re right.” She looked at Beth and motioned toward the kitchen. “Would you like to give me hand?” She nudged her making a playful face. “I’ve got wine.” 

Beth threw her hands up. “Count me in.” 

Sterling watched them leave the room feeling her sense of anxiety over them finding her account slowly melt away. April cupped her chin turning her face, so she was looking into her eyes. The slow, loving smile formed on Sterling’s lips as she leaned in and kissed April tenderly. She only moved back an inch allowing herself to still hover close to her girlfriend’s mouth. 

“Merry Christmas Eve,” Sterling greeted, leaning in for another kiss. 

“Merry Christmas Eve, honey.” April smiled into the kiss, brushing her thumb softly against Sterling’s soft skin. “Your sister was exaggerating FYI,” she muttered against her lips before giving her one final kiss. “They were seriously just gushing over dog videos and foodie spots.” She moved back and looked past Sterling. “No one is going to find your twerking videos.” 

Blair released an offended scoff. “I _do not_ twerk.” Her eyes shifted upward, and it was obvious she was mentally scrolling through her account. She shook her head. “Yeah, no twerking.” 

Sterling roughly nudged her. “You made it sound like it was death con five.” 

“If you don’t think our mother and your mother-in-law scrolling through apps they shouldn’t be on isn’t death con five then I don’t know what to tell you.” 

April closed her eyes as she pinched the bridge of her nose. “Okay, it really wasn’t that serious,” she assured, exhaling heavily. She lowered her hand and cocked her head to left to look at Blair. “And it’s DEFCON not ‘death con’ and five means we’re at peace. That was more like 4, or possibly 3.” 

Blair gave her a blank stare. Sterling blinked, her mouth agape in awe. It never ceased to amaze her how much knowledge April had about pretty much everything. 

The brunette released an exasperated grunt. She waved her hands dismissively and stood up from the couch. “Whatever.” She moved her finger back and forth between them. “Drinks?” 

“Yes, please.” 

Once Blair was gone, Sterling leaned back into the couch. She extended her arms out giving April an adorable pout. She opened and closed her hands, signaling for April to fall into her embrace. April half rolled her eyes, chuckling quietly as she shifted her position on the couch so she could cradle into Sterling. April rested her head against her girlfriends chest and hummed content when Sterling wrapped her arm around her holding her close. 

“I am so glad you’re here,” Sterling whispered, placing a small kiss against April’s forehead. 

“Me too,” April cooed, snuggling impossibly closer. 

They cuddled together in comfortable silence watching as the lights on the Christmas tree blinked in time with the soft sound of instrumental music. Sterling nuzzled her cheek against the top of April’s head as she trailed her fingers softly up and down her girlfriend’s arm. April rested her hand against Sterling’s stomach. She slid her hand into the front pocket and smiled when Sterling lovingly squeezed her arm. 

“Is it really DEFCON?” Sterling asked, furrowing her brow. 

April chuckled quietly and nodded. “Yes, honey. I promise.” 

“And not five? Even though five is the highest number?” 

“You don’t think it makes sense that the highest number would mean peace?” 

Sterling’s words stalled in her throat and her mouth twitched downward as she released a small ‘ _huh’_. 

April slowly slipped her hand out of the front pocket of Sterling’s hoodie. She tugged gently on the material. “I like this hoodie.” 

“Blair bought it for me for my birthday.” Sterling inched back giving herself enough room to look down at April. “You can’t have it.” 

April lifted her head shooting her girlfriend a puzzled look. “Why not?” 

“Babe, you already took one of my hoodies.” 

“Correction. You gave it to me.” 

“Yeah, but still.” Sterling tightened her grip bringing April flush against her. “If you take all my hoodies, I’m not going to have anything left to wear.” 

April brought her bottom lip between her teeth as she slowly wrapped her index finger around the string connected to Sterling’s hoodie. She tugged bringing Sterling’s lips closer to her own. A sly smirk formed on her lips as her gazed shifted from Sterling’s eyes to her lips then back again. 

“That wouldn’t be such a bad thing,” April purred, giving her string another tug. 

Sterling felt the heat rise up her neck and fill her cheeks instantly. Her gaze shifted upward making sure no one was coming. She met April’s eyes again and swallowed, coating the sudden dryness in her throat. “Depending on the situation, I suppose.” 

“Good to know,” April whispered as she gave her hoodie string one final tug bringing Sterling’s lips to her own. 

Their kiss lasted less than five seconds before Anderson Wesley stumbled into the living room carrying several grocery bags. The girls jumped apart when he greeted them, sitting up straighter and adjusting anything that may have gotten out of place during their embrace. Anderson furrowed his brow and released a dismissive noise. 

“Now, you all don’t have to stop acting like you’re in love because I walked in,” he noted, leaning closer to them. “I’m not your mom.” 

Sterling gasped both amused and shocked. “Daddy!” 

Anderson chuckled. “Speaking of your mother, where is she?” 

Sterling motioned toward the kitchen. 

“Ah, got it.” Anderson smiled at April, offering her a polite hello before making his way to the kitchen. He stopped turning to face them once again. “Maybe, though, for your mom’s sake-“ He bounced his head from side to side. “Leave room for Jesus.” 

“Oh, yeah, sure, dad.” 

Sterling and April separated quickly, sitting on the couch properly. He flashed an appreciative smile and continued on his way. The couple exchanged a glance and small laugh before Sterling turned her hand upside down on her lap. She wiggled her fingers silently requesting for April to join their hands. Once she did, Sterling raised their joined hands and pressed a small kiss to the back of April’s. 

April smiled then shifted to rest her head on Sterling’s shoulder. “You think this is enough room for Jesus?” 

Sterling huffed a small laugh. “It’s His birthday. I’m pretty sure he’s focused on more important things.” 

* * *

“Oh, that Jimmy Stewart never fails to make my cry,” Debbie proclaimed, delicately wiping under her eyes. She swiped her hands together before settling them on her lap. She glanced between her husband and Beth. “Shall us adults adjourn to the other room. Maybe indulge in some eggnog and let the kids—” 

“Young adults,” Blair corrected, earning herself an exasperated sigh from her mother. 

“Excuse me,” Debbie apologized, raising her hands defensively. “Let the young adults watch their movie before we all turn in for the night.” 

The adults excused themselves, stopping to give each girl a hug goodnight. Debbie warned for them not to stay up too late as Santa wouldn’t come if they did. April and Blair both snorted a laugh while Sterling promised they head off to bed right after they watched her favorite mindless Christmas movie. 

Once their parents were gone, April settled against Sterling’s side and pulled the blanket she’d brought down earlier over the two of them. Blair rested against the far corner of the couch ignoring April’s joke about not wanting to join the cuddle pile. 

“That was a one-time thing,” Blair stated, a small smirk tugged at the corner of her lips. “I know you enjoyed it, Stevens but maybe just give all the love to your girlfriend this time.” 

“I wasn’t the one asking to do it,” April reminded as she rested her head against Sterling’s chest. She glanced back at Blair laughing when her girlfriend’s twin stuck her tongue out. She shifted against Sterling, wrapping her arm around her midsection. “So, what movie are we watching?” 

The most adorable smile crossed Sterling’s face and her blue eyes lit up excitedly. “I’ve watched this movie ever year since I was six.” She picked up the remote and started scrolling through the library. “Normally, we would watch the DVD, but I didn’t want us to all be stuck huddling around my laptop, so luckily I found it on HULU.” 

April watched the screen as Sterling clicked through the list of Christmas movies. When Sterling stopped on her desired choice, April furrowed her brow and leaned back to look at her girlfriend. “Are you serious?” 

Blair snorted a laugh. “She’s very serious.” 

“What?” Sterling gave them both a confused look. “I love this movie.” 

“Honey, it’s a little… mindless, don’t you think?” 

“Mindless is putting it nicely,” Blair added, scrolling through her phone momentarily. 

Sterling made an offended noise as she dropped the remote. “Well then, you two can do what you want.” She placed her hand on her chest. “But I’m watching Barbie Nutcracker.” 

Blair jutted her chin toward the television. “Isn’t this stuff right up your alley, Stevens?” She turned her full attention to April. “Didn’t you take ballet for like years?” 

April returned her look, raising an eyebrow. “Weren’t you in the same class as I was?” 

“That’s not the point I’m trying to make here.” 

“What is the point then?” 

Sterling picked up the remote again. “The point is the person you both love the most _really_ wants to share this tradition with both of you so-“ She wrinkled her nose. “How about we all shush and watch the movie?” 

“Fine,” Blair grumbled, tossing her phone onto the coffee table. 

April rested her chin on Sterling’s shoulder bringing her lips close to her girlfriend’s ear. “You know I’ll do whatever it takes to make you happy,” she whispered, smiling when Sterling shivered. 

Blair groaned beside them. “Geez, only you two would use a Christmas movie as foreplay.” Sterling shot her sister a look, but Blair brushed her off and motioned toward the television. “Come on, let’s get this thing started.” 

Sterling sighed as she rolled her eyes and picked up the remote. She looked at April and kissed her forehead. “Thank you for watching this with me. It actually means a lot.” 

“Like I said, anything for you.” 

They shared a soft smile followed by an even softer kiss. April hugged Sterling’s midsection before settling in close against her side as Sterling pushed play…. 

* * *

Sterling was in bed, waiting for April to join her once things had quieted down. Blair, ever the meddler had promised to help, but if that was the case, why was Sterling still alone?

The door that connected Sterling’s room to the bathroom leading to Blair’s room creaked open, and Blair stepped through, looking like somebody got her a cat burglar costume for Halloween.

“Blair! Jesus, you scared me half to death. Why are you dressed like that?”

Scanning her outfit--black leggings, black T-shirt, black beanie--uncomprehendingly, Blair cocked her head, giving her twin a look.

“Oh right. _Sneaking_. April. Sneaking April up here.” Sterling scrambled out of her bed, trying to fix her hair and straighten the cute plaid pajama set she was wearing, one that she _had not_ bought for her girlfriend’s benefit, not expressly anyway, but she was certain would be met by approval. “Is she here? Where is she?”

“Change of plans sis, I realized I really don’t want to listen to you go at it all night. So I’m sneaking you down to April instead.”

“What? Why?”

“I just told you. You get loud.”

Sterling pondered for a second how Blair would know anything about how—she looked away, mortified when she realized the walls in the Wesley house might not be nearly as thick as she thought.

Blair rolled her eyes and motioned for Sterling to follow. “The parents are still downstairs doing whatever old people do when their kids have gone to bed.”

“Talking about how everything was better when they were young and—”

“What exactly was better? They didn’t have KPop, TikTok challenges or Lamb of God.”

“They didn’t even have the Internet. When they made calls they had to, like, stare out into the void while talking to a tinny version of the person they were missing.”

“That must’ve sucked ass.”

“How did people survive before smartphones and FaceTime?”

“Truly a mystery for the ages.”

“One we’ll have to ponder _after_ you get back from getting busy with April. If you’re in any state to think of anything other than that, after _that_ ,” Blair smirked.

Sterling pushed Blair ahead of her. “Lead the way, oh master of stealth.”

Blair refused to budge, standing her ground in the middle of Sterling’s room, so Sterling swung around her and started walking towards the hallway door.

“Where do you think you’re going?”

“Uh, to April? I’m not going to wait for you to stop being difficult. Help me or not, I’m going there now.”

“Ah, let me expound: where do you think you’re going, empty handed like that? Don’t you have a present to share with April?”

“Uhh,” Sterling stalled. “Do I have to?”

“Yes,” Blair nodded seriously. “I took great care in picking that out. And since it’s after midnight, you’re allowed to open one present before the morning. And I can’t think of a more appropriate gift than mine.”

“I can think of many, many more appropriate things to give to April.” Blair barked a low laugh and Sterling felt like sinking through the floor. “I didn’t mean it _like that_.”

“I’m sure your horny brain has you on autopilot now that you’re so close to restarting the streak.”

“It sounds so wrong when you say that.”

“Put another notch on your belt?”

“That’s even worse! And I’m not even wearing a belt.”

“All for easier access.”

“You’re the worst.”

“Nope, I’m the best. Only the best kind of sister would go to such great lengths.”

“True. You are the best. And the worst. Simultaneously.”

“Your best/worst sister is telling you that unless you bring that present you’re on your own. And so will April be. All alone in that guest room, wondering why her one-track girlfriend has forsaken her.”

“I take it back. You’re just the worst,” Sterling said as she let herself get guilted into collecting the ticking time bomb from where she had hidden it.

Blair double and triple-checked before she gave Sterling the all-clear, and drubbed her fingers softly against the door leading to the guest room April was staying in. “You decent, Stevens? I brought you your present.” Blair cracked the door open, peeking in to see if April was indeed decent. Or asleep.. 

“Can’t it wait?” April answered, not sounding sleepy at all. “It’s late and I want to get some sleep so I can get up early to maximize the time—”

“You and Sterling can spend together?” Blair helpfully finished April’s sentence, grinning knowingly. “Yeah, that’s what I thought and why I brought you this,” she added and opened the door fully, revealing Sterling standing beside her, biting her lip.

“I couldn’t think of a better present for you than this horny bundle of anticipation and need.” She prodded Sterling, who was now full-on chewing on her lip. “I was going to bring her to you wearing only ribbons for modesty and strategically placed bows, but she nixed that plan.”

“I did not!” Sterling protested. “You never brought it up...”

Blair raised an eyebrow. “Does that mean you would have done it if I had?”

“I-uh,” Sterling’s brain short circuited when she thought of April unwrapping her eagerly like a child during Christmas morning.

With an evil cackle, Blair gave her sister a shove. “Get in there before our parents walk in on this very _horny_ moment.”

“Uhh,” it took Sterling a few seconds to start thinking again. “"Wait! Blair, how are you going to distract mom and dad? They might—you know, since you pointed it out—hear us." 

Blair just shrugged her shoulders. "Not my problem. I'm sure you'll figure something out. Stevens is creative."

Sterling nearly tossed the heavy box she was carrying at her sister, but in case it actually contained explosives, she decided against it, setting on poking her tongue out. “Worst.”

“Best,” Blair replied, her tongue also making an appearance. “And don’t you forget it. After tonight you’ll owe me so many favors. So, so many favors.”

“Sterl, get _in here_ already. That was the only sound thing Blair said, so please don’t ignore it just because Evil Twin said it.”

Dropping the box Blair made her carry all the way down here next to the door, Sterling stepped inside and made an elaborate show of carefully closing the door silently, and then turning the lock.

“You’re ridiculous.”

“And you’re ridiculously lucky I’m here. I was upstairs waiting for you.”

“Blair told me she had a plan, but neither of you showed up, I thought you got busted. Or that you, you know…”

“No, I don’t know. What, Sterl?”

“That you didn’t want to, because of mom and her rules.”

April smiled and lifted the covers, an invitation Sterling was more than happy to accept, climbing into bed with her girlfriend and curling up next to her, surprising them both when she practically purred with happiness and contentment. 

“Doesn’t this feel weird to you?” April asked softly, brushing the hair from Sterling’s forehead.

“Not a bit.”

“Are you sure? Under your parents’ roof, with Debbie being all, you know…”

“Yeah, okay.” The strangest thing was that the moment Sterling had laid eyes on April in her cute pajamas, everything else had faded away. Blair would say that she was on autopilot, but that wasn’t really true. She could just lay here in her love’s embrace and be perfectly happy. “It does, a bit, I’ll admit that.” Sterling nodded and looked straight into April’s eyes. “But when the alternative is—”

“Agreed. I’m so happy you’re here. I’ve wanted to…”

“Me too. I think Blair noticed. She made some very lewd comments about the looks we were exchanging.”

“She’s going to be the death of me. I’m pretty sure that even when we’re home alone in the privacy of our apartment she’ll be able to sense whenever we’re about to make love through your weird connection.”

“And she’ll send inappropriate texts of encouragement. ‘That was a 7.2 on the Richter Scale of Orgasms’”

April winced. “There is no doubt she’s going to be the death of me. I love—I’ve learned to love your sister, but she’s a lot.”

“This might be the first time I appreciate the inappropriate amount of attention she pays to our love life,” Sterling agreed.

“And that box? You dumped it like it was toxic. I assume that’s another Blair special.”

Sterling nodded. “It’s her ‘couples gift’ to us. She was very insistent I bring it tonight.”

“Sterl, I don’t think we’re quite at the point of needing marital aids,” April rolled her eyes. “You tell her everything, so why does she think we need help?”

Sterling had to chuckle. “I doubt that’s why she got us whatever that thing is. She’s just very… open, and doesn’t have any compunction about using and doing whatever brings you pleasure and joy.”

“I’ll rephrase then, if that’s okay with you: I don’t think we’re at that _stage_ yet. We’re still,” April looked shyly at Sterling. “Exploring and learning. If it turns out marital aids—”

“April, please!” Sterling blurted. “Sex toys. Vibrators. Call them whatever you want, but not ‘marital aids’. We’re not living in the fifties.”

April poked her girlfriend in the ribs. “Hey! Your sister is not the only open-minded person that exists in the world. Just because my vocabulary is more refined that doesn’t mean I can’t entertain the notion of exploring… with… sex toys.”

“You really are adorable when you’re so embarrassed your ears go all red.”

“Are these new?” April pointed at Sterling’s plaid pajamas, in an attempt to get out of discussing marital aids with the girl she’d barely begun to be intimate with. She couldn’t stop herself from running her hands across the fabric, feeling Sterling’s chest rising to meet her touch. “I don’t remember seeing you wear this set before.”

“Yeah, I just bought them.”

“For me?” April’s half-smirk appeared and Sterling’s stomach flip-flopped.

“No. Yes? No? I don’t know. It’s not like I went looking for something sexy to wear like…” she didn’t finish, but April nodded, knowing that Sterling was talking about the brain meltingly sexy outfit she bought especially for their time at the lake house. “But you, and this, and doing this with you, is never far from my mind, so of course when I’m buying sleepwear, that does influence my choices.”

“It’s very cute. And on you it becomes very sexy too.” April pressed her hands flat against Sterling, feeling her heartbeat. “On you, everything becomes sexy.”

“You’re just saying that,” Sterling teased, eager to hear more about the things April might be thinking about wanting to see her wear. “PJs can be cute, just like yours are cute, but I think you might be biased.”

April replied by grabbing Sterling by the lapels, pulling her in for a heated kiss.

“Thank god, I thought I’d made a mistake wearing this. So much talking, so little kissing,” Sterling wrapped her arms around April’s neck and went searching for her lips again.

“You think I care that much about what you’re wearing when,” April smirked and toyed with the buttons running down the front of the top, “the whole idea is to get you out of any and all clothing as quickly as possible?”

“Not quickly enough,” Sterling whined and rolled on top of April, but instead of straddling the petite wonder beneath her, she stretched her body out, blanketing herself against April, trying to maximize the contact between them. She kissed April softly. “If you want to and I want to then I think we should.”

“But, Debbie might..”

“The door is locked. Nobody is going to walk in on us.”

“Locking a door does not make it soundproof.”

“We’ll be quiet.” When April looked at her, she amended: “Okay, _I’ll_ be quiet.”

April’s eyes darkened and the look turned hungry. “I don’t know, Sterl, I might consider it a personal failure if I don’t make you scream.”

“I’ll—” Sterling stopped and swallowed when she saw the gleam in April’s eyes when she anticipated what Sterling would say.

“Behave? You’d do that for me?”

Sterling nodded, unable to tear herself away from April’s gaze.

The kiss April gave Sterling was insatiable, filled with endless desire, enough to take her breath away, and when Sterling thought she had already lost herself in its bottomless pool, April’s hands tangled themselves in her hair, tightening the grip April already held over her.

When April used that grip to pull Sterling’s head back, allowing her access to her girlfriend’s neck, Sterling tumbled deeper. April alternated soft, tender kisses with harsh nibbles that made it very hard for Sterling not to yelp and moan.

“Shhh, remember your promise.”

April’s quiet reminder might as well have been an encouragement telling Sterling to be louder for all the good it did. Everything about it sent her reeling. The whisper that tickled her skin, the firm tone that both threatened and promised more to come, it all added up to a shudder that travelled through her body.

Next she knew, she was literally tumbling. April had shifted underneath her, pushing her girlfriend’s listless body aside like it was weightless. Sterling looked up and saw April settling in, sitting up against the headboard. Once she was happy with her position, she fixed her eyes on Sterling and motioned her to come closer. Sterling blushed and averted her eyes, April’s look nearly too much for her to handle. But she still crawled forward, moving in between April’s legs. 

Sterling was surprised when April took her by the chin and lifted her face so they once again were looking at one another. April’s face had changed, gone soft and her look was so filled with aching love that Sterling felt like crying.

“Is this good?” April’s question was another surprise, because Sterling couldn’t fathom how April could ever think otherwise. When Sterling nodded, breathless, April cupped her cheek so tenderly it nearly burned her. “I need to hear you say it. Please, Sterl, tell me you’re okay, if this is okay.”

This time, Sterling’s nod was joined by a shaky, breathed confirmation: “Yeaah, babe, I’m good. It’s all good.”

April’s response was decidedly non-verbal, but no less clear. She threaded her fingers back through Sterling’s hair, but instead of doing what Sterling expected and wanted her to do, she twisted her grip, forcing Sterling to roll over on her back again, and shimmy back into April’s full-body embrace.

Her lips found Sterling’s neck again, feathering soft kisses up and down while April wrapped an arm around her chest and pulled her girlfriend to her, tightly. “You’re so beautiful Sterling, and I love you so much. I want to make you happy and feel good in every way I can.”

April leaned closer and put her lips to Sterling’s already tingly skin, sucking harshly. Her free hand found the base of Sterling’s throat, teasing it briefly before wrapping itself around the throat with gentle care and ease. April’s lips dislodged and she spoke again: “The only downside to having you like this is that I can’t see your face when you come, but the advantages make up for it.”

Sterling found herself pushed forward for just a few seconds, and before she realized what was happening, April had trapped her arms between their bodies. One of April’s arms were wrapped around her shoulders, holding her tightly, her back crushing against April’s torso, while April busied herself with undoing the buttons of her pajama top.

When April finally pushed the fabric aside and placed the most teasing touches up and down Sterling’s body, she finally broke her promise and let out a low whine. April immediately covered Sterling’s mouth with the hand that was busy teasing her, making Sterling groan in frustration. “Shhh, behave, or I’ll have to stop.”

To demonstrate just how willing she was to halt the proceedings, April released her hold on Sterling’s shoulders and used that hand to apply the slightest pressure against Sterling’s throat. “I don’t want to stop. Do you want me to stop?”

Sterling shook her head wildly, feeling April’s strong hands restricting her motions.

April rubbed the tip of her nose against Sterling’s neck, nodding softly, and exhaling with relief. Again, she didn’t say much, opting instead to let her fingers and her lips do the talking. She placed a soft kiss to the back of Sterling’s head before she once again pulled her girlfriend close, holding her tightly.

Her fingers weren’t nearly as teasing this time, and not as eagerly exploratory either, they travelled with intent and a set destination. Sterling shivered when she felt cool air hit hot skin for the first time, when the elastic of her plaid bottoms were lifted from her skin for long enough to allow April access.

“April, pleeeease,” Sterling whined and once again found herself silenced immediately. 

This time the tone was no longer playful. “You clearly can’t be trusted.” April’s low growl was almost enough by itself to send Sterling over the edge. “So you’re no longer allowed to speak. Nod if you understand.”

Sterling nodded wildly, eager for April to continue.When April moved closer, Sterling braced her for a snarled, pointed word or two that was certain to undo her, but instead came the softest whisper, so low she could barely make it out: “I love you, darling.”

Barely had the words left April’s lips before she started undoing Sterling piece by piece. Her fingers and lips were teasing Sterling mercilessly, and when April finally touched her, Sterling arched her back so violently she felt like a bowstring about to snap. Only one thing remained constant: her girlfriend’s firm hand over her mouth, keeping her moans and whines contained, preventing her from screaming April’s name.

Whenever however long it took for April to completely unravel her and then put her back together, piece by tingly piece, ended, Sterling found herself back on her back, panting loudly, glazed eyes staring out of focus at the ceiling. She could sense April next to her, talking her down and softly kissing her face, her shoulders, her neck. Once she gathered herself enough to make sense of things again, she heard April talking while stroking her hair.

"Shhh, you're still being very loud, but that's my fault, so maybe I should take responsibility for quieting you down."

“What?” She didn’t get a response, but shortly she realized that April was sitting on her chest, and when she shimmied forward and dropped to her knees, whatever panting Sterling was still capable of was muffled by April’s body pressing against her.

Eventually Sterling stopped floating and returned back to earth, cuddling close to her very real, and very tangible girlfriend. They snuggled under the covers for a while, saying nothing more than words of love and admiration. Eventually, they’d have to part and Sterling return to her room, but before that had to happen, she pulled the covers over them completely, creating a little bubble of safety and love.

“Whatever made you think of putting your hand over my mouth like that?” she asked.

“We needed to be quiet,” April stated simply.

“Yes, but… you _like_ the noises I make. You like coaxing them from me.”

“I do.” April blushed under the safety of the covers. “That’s no secret. It shouldn’t come as any great surprise that I like making you feel good.”

“So good.” Sterling nodded appreciatively. 

“And hearing you like that is a great affirmation of my… actions.” April felt stupid calling the loving ways she’d found to make Sterling lose control by such a clinical term.

“But you also liked doing that, didn’t you? Exerting control.”

“It-it wasn’t too--”

“Too much?” Sterling said, finishing April’s thought with a laugh that probably was the loudest noise she’d made all night. “April, please…”

“What, honey?”

Sterling sighed, feeling slightly awkward having to say this out loud. “It’s not really a secret that watching you be bossy, err, does things to me.”

“I might have noticed. As have others, and not just Blair.”

Sterling swatted at her laughing girlfriend. “And while I’ve not always responded favorably in the past when you turned your bossy focus towards me, context matters.”

“So…”

“So… what I’m saying is that in this context, I might respond extremely favorably.”

“Extremely?”

“Like, you have no idea. That was so hot. I think I actually left my body for a bit and just floated in a sea of bliss.” Sterling smiled, gladly losing herself in that memory for a moment or two.

“I’m happy it was okay.”

Sterling snorted. “Okay. You say okay. Okay, you can say okay. But if that was okay, I might go orbital sooner rather than later.”

April laughed and snuggled closer to her ridiculous girlfriend.

“I have one question though.”

“Anything. If this is something that might become a thing, we have to be open and honest.”

“‘Darling’? Really? Where did that come from?”

“I’m not sure, really, I’m not.” April contemplated for a second, risking losing herself in the memories like Sterling just had. “I was in the moment and I needed to let you know what I was saying wasn’t part of, you know, the thing. So I needed something I wouldn’t normally say. Something that indicated this was special.”

Sterling nodded, smiling widely. “It was special,” she said before cupping April’s face and kissing her lovingly. “I can’t wait for the next time you call me darling.”


	25. "Santa’s Handwriting"

April rested comfortably on her elbow, observing her girlfriend sleeping peacefully next to her. When she had made a photo of a serene Sterling looking not at all unlike what April now had right in front of her the wallpaper on her phone, she thought the days when it would all come true was still some ways away. But now Sterling was here, in bed with her, and she’d been here all night, falling asleep alongside April after… after… April found it hard to call it love making; there was definite love behind her actions last night, and she found it impossibly thrilling to make Sterling do the things they did, but love making sounded… incorrect, imprecise.

Distracted by Sterling shifting softly, April checked the time and regretted that soon she had no choice but to wake Sterling from her slumber. They hadn’t meant to fall asleep together, although it was another blessing in a long line of blessing, not when it meant risking Sterling’s parents becoming aware of their sinful misdeeds. April covered her mouth to soften the chuckle she felt about to burst through when she used those silly words to describe acts of love and devotion. 

Realizing how much this situation mirrored last night, the soft chuckle became a full-body laugh, strong enough to rouse Sterling and have her look at her girlfriend with confusion on her adorably sleepy face. ”April? Whu?”

April bopped Sterling on the tip of the nose and put a finger against her lip. “Morning, sleepyhead. It’s still really early, but we need to get you back to your room—”

“My room?”

“Yes, your room. You fell asleep last night.” April grinned. “ _We_ fell asleep. Together. Again.”

Sterling pulled April down to her and did her best to kiss the grin off her girlfriend’s face. “And you call me ridiculous.”

“Don’t you like it? Don’t you like waking up next to me?” April tried her hardest to mimic Sterling’s patented pout, going so far as sticking out her tongue when Sterling gave her a loving shove.

“It’s very nice. Wonderful even. And I want it to keep happening until it’s not a novelty.” Sterling bit her lip when she saw her girlfriend’s eager nodding. Whatever had gotten into April this morning was a wonder to behold. Maybe she was finally rubbing off on April, even though last night the opposite was the case. “But you, you—”

“What? I’m what?”

“I could say ‘practically glowing’ and it’d be true too, but, babe, you’re giddy. That’s wonderful. Too. But it’s starting to freak me out. Why are you acting like this?”

“I, uh…” April stopped to think about it, settling down, resting her chin on her girlfriend’s shoulder. The previous version of her would be anxious and concerned, focused on getting away from this compromising situation; instead she felt free and light, but this was not new, not any more. “I think it’s because this isn’t a novelty any more. It’s still not our everyday, but this—” she gestured to the bed, to the two of them sharing it, before her hand fell on Sterling’s cheek, stroking it softly “—it gives me such a wonderful sense of continuity, of safety, and a sense of what our life, our _everyday_ will be like, and it’s the best feeling, the _best_.”

Sterling started laughing until April pressed her finger to her girlfriend's lips again, effectively begging her to be quiet. Sterling nodded and kissed the tip of April’s finger. “I love you.”

April ran her finger over Sterling’s lips, gently tracing their outline. “I love you. When this is our everyday, I won’t have to do what I’m about to.”

‘A-and what’s that?” Sterling’s could still feel the ghost of April’s hand covering her mouth last night.

“Tell you to get out of bed,” April sighed dramatically, “and get back to your room before your mom catches us!”

“It’s not fair, we were having a moment,” Sterling pouted, far more adorably than April had managed. “I don’t want to leave you.”

“And I don’t want you to either,” April said quietly, “but if you don’t, our moment will become a full-blown _thing_ , and your mom will definitely notice that.”

Sterling nodded and swallowed, not sure what was more heart-stopping: the thought of being caught by Debbie Wesley, or the way April’s tone had changed and suggested that ‘thing’ definitely was a thing that although still undefined was new and bound to become a thing between them soon. “I don’t understand how you do that.”

“What’s that, honey?”

Sterling sat on the edge of the bed, slowly buttoning her pajama top back up and making sure there was no tinsel stuck in incriminating places. “Make ‘thing’ sound like the most alluring and exciting word in the English language.”

April’s laugh was only slightly teasing. “I have a very receptive audience.”

“I’m your audience. You have an audience of one.”

“It has made me an expert. And it helps that she’s also very...responsive.”

Sterling shivered when April lifted the back of her top and placed several kisses along her spine. “Ok, ok, ok, I’m going, I’m going.”

“Take Blair’s _gift_ with you, please?” The scare quotes were audible from space.

Sterling nearly made it to the stairs and a safe escape upstairs before she was caught by her mother, already awake and in the kitchen filling the coffee maker with water before grabbing the bag of beans Blair insisted they grind fresh daily instead of buying packs of ‘beige tasting’ ground coffee.

“Sterling, sweetie! You’re up early. I didn’t expect you girls to be up a moment before it’s time to open your presents.”

“Uh, why would you say that, mom?”

“Now, now, Sterling, I know you stayed up pretty late. I could hear you talking and laughing long after that movie you were watching ended.”

“You could?!” Sterling tried to sound calm. “Uh, yeah, I suppose it got a bit later than planned.”

“It’s okay, sweetie, I didn’t have the heart to break up your little _love-fest_ ,” she laughed at her own joke. “It was just nice to hear the three of you getting along, just like family should. Especially during Christmas.”

Sterling nodded dumbly, trying to find the quickest way out this conversation that would generate the fewest questions she might stumble over when trying to come up with convincing answers that wouldn’t incriminate her in some way.

“What is that you’re carrying, sweetie?” Debbie motioned towards the still-wrapped box containing whatever Blair thought was the most inappropriate thing to get for her and April. “Is that another present? I thought they were all already placed safely under the tree, where they belong.”

“Yes, mom, but I forgot to wrap this one the other day. I didn’t realize until just now, and I thought I could sneak it in next to the other presents without anyone noticing.”

“That seems a little dramatic, but okay, if you want to be sneaky, I suppose there’s no harm in that.” Debbie rubbed the backside of her hand against her daughter’s cheek. “Say, who’s the gift for?”

“Oh, uh, it’s for Blair.”

“Shouldn’t it say so somewhere?” Debbie laughed at her daughter, marveling at how such a smart girl sometimes made the silliest mistakes.

“Oh, gosh, you’re right, mom, like 100% accurate. I guess I forgot all about it in my rush to get it ready. I’ll fix it right away, I have all the stuff I need in—in my _room_ ,” Sterling turned and sprinted up the stairs, ignoring her mom’s shouted warning about there being no running in the house.

When a smirking Blair met her at the top of the stairs, she slowed down and tried to shove her way past her twin.

“Got caught sneaking, did we?”

“We did not,” Sterling retorted, holding up Blair’s gift. “Happily, you provided me with the perfect alibi.”

“Sis, why is that still wrapped?” Blair gasped, outraged. “I bought it for _you two_ for when you, you know… bone. You did bone this time, right? It wasn’t another five hours filled with chaste kisses, please Sterl, tell me you got down.”

Apparently Sterling’s poker face was worse than she thought, because she hadn’t moved a muscle when Blair offered her hand up top, for a celebratory _yay, you boned!_ high-five. She just rolled her eyes and ignored Blair glaring at her.

“Fine. But now that you’re active again, I assure you my very thoughtful gift will help keep the streak alive. Besides, it was too expensive to just sit in a box until Skynet finally ends us all.” Blair turned around and retreated to her bedroom. “And I have a feeling Stevens will love it. And knowing you, you’ll learn to love her enthusiasm.”

Hearing Blair’s door click closed filled Sterling with relief, but she wasn’t out of the woods just yet. Her alibi had become an albatross. She had to put _something_ under the tree, or her mother would surely wonder what the whole point to her early morning escapades was. 

Which meant doing the one thing she really didn’t want to…

Sterling turned the box over, looking on every side, even underneath, trying to figure out how to defuse this timebomb without making it obvious it had been opened before she could seal it back up and put it under the tree.

She found the seams held together with nearly invisible tape and went over to her desk, picking up a pair of scissors, carefully cutting the tape, making sure not to nick or tear neither the wrapping paper nor the box. 

Thankful the box containing the gift was surrounded by an outer, unmarked cardboard box, neutral and completely innocent. It felt a bit thin and flimsy, clearly meant more as a way to obscure what was hidden inside than provide any kind of protection or structural integrity, but it didn’t matter, all it meant was Sterling could easily reseal the gift without too much trouble.

Without realizing she was squinting and looking away, Sterling folded back the flaps and revealed what was inside. When she finally dared look, she only saw shiny black coated cardboard, so with a sigh, she grabbed the package and held it upside down, giving a careful shake to dislodge whatever foulness hid inside.

When it came unstuck and hit the floor with a loud thunking noise, Sterling jumped back, gasping in shock, eyes wide. She wouldn’t ever have thought… not even Blair… “BLAIR WHAT THE MOTHER-LOVING—”

Blair’s evil cackle bounced between the walls. 

Sterling picked the frankly obscene thing off her floor, Blair’s gift on display in a window-box that left nothing to imagination, not concerning what was inside nor about how it was supposed to be used. She averted her eyes and held the box as far from herself as she possibly could. Back into the closet it went. She made a mental note to return later and find a good way to disguise it from prying eyes.

All that was left was selecting something for Blair, even though it was entirely unfair that her wicked, wicked ways would net her an extra gift, one she so very did not deserve. Lacking in both time and options, she grabbed the chocolate lump of coal she had intended as a stocking stuffer for Blair, before it became obvious providing her with more sugar was a very foolish thing to do.

Quickly sealing the box closed and carefully taping the wrapping paper back in place, Sterling returned back downstairs, present in hand, to quell her mother’s inevitable curiosity.

* * *

The floor of the Wesley’s family room looked like it had been hit by a Christmas tornado. Debbie tried her best to keep everything organized but had given up by the time Blair had ripped through her third gift. Her designated trash bag had been discarded behind the couch with the promise that everyone would assist in clean up once the gift giving had ceased.

Sterling shuffled back to the Christmas tree causing the antlers on her new reindeer slippers to bounce up and down with each step. April’s heart warmed at the sight of her excited girlfriend who was currently wearing the brand-new hoodie she’d received from Beth. It was nice to see her mother’s sense of humor coming into play at the joint gift she had given April and Sterling. And April loved that fact that her mother knew them so well.

Sterling started walking back and April laughed at the words printed in bright white letters across the front of her new top. ‘If lost please return to April’. It was fitting and, if April was being honest, bound to happen on one point during their future college experience. She would just have to remember to wear her ‘I’m April’ hoodie at the same time so there was no confusion on who Sterling should be returned to… just in case.

“I am so glad you girls liked those,” Beth gushed, holding her unopened gift on her lap. “I found them when I was browsing through Amazon and I thought it was just the cutest thing.”

Sterling cradled the gifts she was carrying in her left arm as she tugged at the bottom of her new hoodie. “I love it, Beth. Truly. It’s super comfy.”

“Yeah, mom, they’re adorable,” April added, smiling when Sterling carefully crossed over her to get to Blair. “And I’m sure they’ll be helpful one day.”

“She’s right,” Blair agreed, accepting the gift Sterling handed to her with a smile filled with thanks. “Sterl does tend to wander off sometimes.”

“You guys make it sound like I have no sense of direction what-so-ever,” Sterling complained, taking a set beside April once again.

April flashed her a playful pout as she rubbed a comforting circle against Sterling’s back.

"When April is around you have no sense of anything what-so-ever." Blair looked down and her gift and began tearing at the paper as she raised her shoulder in a half shrug. “Like propriety, decency, modesty..."

“Blair, good lord!” Debbie scolded, slapping her hand against her thigh. “It’s Christmas and we have guests. Can you control your mouth? For one day, please?”

Blair widened her eyes and mouthed ‘sorry’ as she continued to rip open her gift from Sterling. She tossed the wrapping paper onto the floor ignoring the heavy sigh her mother released and clasped the tiny box that was inside. There was a huge heart on the outside and Blair was almost tempted to ask if her sister had gotten her gift mixed up with April’s before Sterling piped up to explain.

“It’s a Love Box,” Sterling said as though it should be completely obvious. 

Blair raised an eyebrow silently requesting clarification. “And this is supposed to be for me?”

Sterling nodded. “It’s for when you go to UCLA,” she explained, feeling the sadness of knowing her sister was going to be so far away already settling in. She was thankful that April hadn’t stopped rubbing her back. It was calming her in ways she couldn’t really explain. “It’s so I can send you messages and pictures and-“ She paused, tilting her head to the side as a sudden realization settled over her. “-which I know we could do through text, but this is so much cooler.” She motioned her finger in a circle. “When you get a message, the little heart turns in a circle until you open it.”

“Aw, Sterl,” Blair cooed, and Sterling was almost positive her sister was about to cry. She steeled herself though and scooted closer to give her a hug. “I love you so much.”

“I love you so much,” Sterling gushed, giving her a tight hug back. 

“Uh, were you planning on telling your parents you were going to UCLA?” Anderson questioned, raising an eyebrow at his daughters.

Blair and Sterling gently pulled away from one another looking at their parents sheepishly. 

“Well, you see, it’s not _definite_ yet but-“ Blair raised her shoulders as a guilty expression covered her face. “It’s kinda definite.”

Debbie locked eyes with Blair. Her expression was stern but encouraging. “We will discuss this later.”

“Yes, ma’am.” Blair muttered, shooting Sterling a sideways glare.

“Sorry,” Sterling mouthed apologetically as she scooted back against April’s side.

April nudged her getting Sterling’s full attention. “I have one more gift for you.”

Sterling’s mouth fell agape. “Babe, that’s like the fifth one.”

“I promise it’s the last one.” April reached to her left and picked up the neatly wrapped gift to her right. She turned back to Sterling, a shy smile on her lips as she handed her the present. “I actually made this one myself.”

Sterling released a tiny _‘aw’_ as she accepted the gift. “You are just full of surprises.”

April shrugged her shoulder casually. “I do what I can,” she stated, smiling brightly when Sterling delicately brushed the tips of her fingers across her cheek. 

April watched intently as her girlfriend meticulously tore the wrapping paper revealing the gift inside. Sterling’s expression shifted from confusion to complete awe as she read the directions so carefully printed on the outside of the jar. Her blue eyes met April’s with a strong loving gaze. 

“Now, you can’t start using anything in there until January,” April explained, tapping her short nail on the glass. “That way you get a full year.”

“April, this is amazing. I can’t wait to see what you put in here.”

“Remember, no cheating.”

“I won’t, I swear.” Sterling knitted her brow curiously as she inspected the colors inside of the jar. “Hey, there is no key for what the red ones mean.”

April’s face flushed suddenly, and she glanced around the room. Thankfully, their parents were engaged with one another and only half paying attention to what they were doing. She leaned in close to Sterling and spoke quietly. “The red ones are for-“ She bit her lip looking around one final time before meeting Sterling’s eyes again. “You know…”

Sterling looked confused for only a split second before her beautiful eyes widened and her face turned red. Almost as red as the tiny pieces of paper inside the jar. “Oh, wow, okay. Now I’m even more excited.”

April chuckled shyly giving her a small shove. 

Sterling smiled, trying to play it cool. “It so happens I have one final present for you too, babe.”

“You shouldn’t have.”

Blair scoffed from off-screen. “She really shouldn’t have. How are the rest of us supposed to compete with all these gifts? It’s ridiculous.”

Sterling glared at her sister, the day still young, but her patience already gone. She faced the love of her life again, holding out a big box. “This is for you, April. From Santa.”

April chuckled when she inspected the present. “Santa’s handwriting looks suspiciously like yours.”

“Excellent penmanship is often indistinguishable from one person to another.”

“If you say so, honey. Do I get a hint?”

“How could I know what Santa would get you?” Sterling blinked bashfully.

April picked carefully at the tape, making sure not to damage the wrapping paper as she slowly unfolded the flaps and straightened the creases. She grabbed the edges of the box previously hidden and held it toward Sterling. “Would you mind grabbing the paper so I can slide the box out without having to tear it?”

Sterling nodded and bit her lip, nervous energy filling her. The methodical way April dissected her presents was mesmerizing, but it also took forever, and Sterling didn’t want to wait another second if she didn’t have to. “Babe, would you?”

“Patience is a virtue, Sterling. And being able to reuse as much of the packing material as possible is good for the environment. And it saves money too.” April gave a small lecture but stopped when she could see her girlfriend practically bouncing with nervous excitement. 

She found the lid flap and opened the box, only to be greeted by wadded up tissue paper. Confused, she grabbed a handful and tossed it to the floor. When she saw yet another box hidden under the packing material, she frowned and repeated the process. Another box. She glared at Sterling. “What is this, Sterl? Is there even anything in here?”

Sterling continued chewing on her lip, merely nodding when questioned by April.

The running commentary offered by Blair reached a fever pitch as she laughed uproariously and said, “Told you so, sis. I didn’t want to have to say I told you so, but here we are, you wouldn’t listen, so this is when I say I told you so. And I told you I would get to say it.”

April ignored her demon-in-law and pulled the latest, fairly small box out and held it in her hand, presenting it to Sterling. “Is this it, Sterl? Is this the present?”

Sterling nodded, having to bite her cheeks and sit on her hands to prevent herself from doing and saying anything that would ruin this moment.

“Okay, here goes.” April took a deep breath. “This better be good.” She opened the lid on the last box, rolling her eyes as she discarded a pinchful of tissue paper. She peered into the box, only to see another box. But this box was different from the others, this was no ordinary cardboard box. April reached in and carefully brought what could only be a ring box into the light. She gasped and put a hand over her heart. “Oh, Sterling.”

“STERLING!” came the combined outburst from all three parents. 

“That’s not what I think—”

“Sweetie, I know you love Sterling, but—”

“—PEARL WESLEY!”

A piercing whistle cut through the din and when Blair removed her fingers from her mouth, she said, “Everybody cool it! Hear her out.”

Sterling nodded gratefully and turned to reassure the Wesley-Stevens parents: “I know what you think, I know what this looks like, but you know us, do you really think—” she sighed when she realized what everybody was thinking “—okay, fair, but you know April and you know she would never do this without debating the pros and cons over at least five rounds, and she would win all of them, regardless of which side she was on.”

Sterling turned to April and smiled warmly. “It’s a promise ring. Because if there’s one thing I’m certain about, it’s you, April. I want you in my life, now and forever. And that’s what this ring—” she nudged a still awe-struck April to indicate that maybe actually cracking the box open would be appropriate now “—represents. It’s called a trilogy ring, and it has three stones, one for our past, one for the present, and one for the future. We have been friends, we have been enemies, and now we are girlfriends. Maybe someday we will be more, time will tell, but I will always stand beside you. Never doubt my commitment to you, to us, and to our relationship.” 

April looked at Sterling with such softness that even the most hardened cynic would shed a tear. She cupped Sterling’s cheek, caressing it with the pad of her thumb before kissing the girl she loved with every ounce of affection she could muster. The kiss lingered until April pulled away, putting their foreheads together. “I love you, Sterling,” she said as she finally opened her eyes again and met Sterling’s gaze. 

“Could you? Do you want to?” She offered the box to Sterling so she could put the ring on her finger.

Sterling nodded happily and picked up the ring, holding it between her index finger and thumb.’

“It’s absolutely gorgeous.”

“It had to be perfect. For you, April, perfect for you.” Sterling reached for April’s hand, but stopped when she heard Blair coughing very unsubtly. She looked down and blushed when she realized she was holding April’s left hand. “Oh right, right. Sorry.”

April laughed and ignored the way their parents were glaring at Sterling. When Sterling slid the ring onto her right-hand ring finger so she could finally hold it up and see how it looked, her heart felt fuller and more complete than ever before. If she failed to mimic Sterling’s pout earlier this morning, she had no trouble matching and surpassing her dopey grin now.

The happy couple sat there, basking at each other, their smiles unrivaled and happiness total. At least until Debbie cleared her throat and stated: "Well, now that our hearts are all pumping why don't we have some breakfast and hurry off to Church." Before anyone could exit the room, she added, with a very firm voice, “AFTER we clean up.”

A chorus of “Yes, ma’am” was heard, even from Beth Stevens.

* * *

Sterling simply didn’t want to this day to end.

When they returned home from Church, her mother had been kind enough to let them spend some time alone in her bedroom “With the door open” until it was time for dinner. She didn’t hesitate to grab April’s hand and bolt upstairs to the semi privacy of her bedroom. Anytime she could spend with April where it was just them was perfectly fine with her. 

Even if she had to keep every door open.

At least she was able to cuddle with April the way she wanted to and not be limited to “parental guidelines” and the proper way to sit with her girlfriend. She’d never been more content lying on her bed, her back pressed against the headboard, and April snuggled comfortably against her. April was sitting between her legs, her back resting against Sterling’s front. Sterling’s arms wrapped around her midsection holding her in place.

Sterling couldn’t resist the amount of access she had to April’s neck and shoulders. She took advantage of every patch of skin placing soft loving kisses against all of it. April tilted her head giving her more access from her space behind her. Regardless of how many happy sighs April released when Sterling trailed kisses up her neck, she knew her girlfriend wasn’t paying attention to anything other than the ring gleaming brightly on her finger.

“I’m starting to think you love that ring more than you love me,” Sterling muttered against her skin. 

When April didn’t respond, she narrowed her eyes and bit gently down on her shoulder receiving a sharp intake of breath. Sterling laughed at her reaction then suddenly groaned when April lightly nudged her in the stomach with her elbow.

“Sterling,” April cautioned, looking at her from the corner of her eye. “Behave.”

Sterling squeezed her midsection as she nuzzled her nose into April’s neck. “I’m just trying to get your attention.” She shifted, resting her chin on April’s shoulder. “You’re paying more attention to the ring than to me.”

April lowered her hand then turned so she could see Sterling a little clearer. “I’m sorry, honey, I’m just so-“ she paused, searching for the right words. “In awe of all of this. Not of the ring. Of you. Of what this ring represents. Of your commitment to us. I never doubted us for a moment, but this makes a statement, it tells the world where we stand and what we mean to each other. It’s amazing. And I love you so much for it.”

A half smirk formed on the corner of Sterling’s lips. “I think I’ve made it pretty clear time and time again that I am totally committed to us.” She loosened her grip and took April’s hand in her own. “This is just a symbol to represent that and show that when you’re ready for the next step-“ She held April’s gaze, staring adoringly into her eyes. “I’m ready.”

It wasn’t often that April found herself speechless but when she was, Sterling was usually the reason. Her hand raised, resting gently on Sterling’s cheek. The smile on Sterling’s lips formed slowly and April felt her own mirroring her girlfriend’s. It felt like an eternity had passed since she’d actually said anything at all. Sterling was simply staring back at her, that dopey, loving smile on her face. The one that made all of April melt into a puddle of mush and goo and made her want to do nothing but give Sterling everything.

Without another thought, she leaned in and kissed her. There wasn’t anything overly passionate about the embrace. Just a soft, lingering touch saying everything April wanted to say but hadn’t in that moment. They stayed that way, enjoying the caress of one another’s lips. The way Sterling tenderly wrapped her fingers around April’s wrist, mimicking April’s ministrations against her cheek. 

Their first Christmas together was definitely perfect.

“Mom’s coming!”

The sound of Blair’s voice echoing through Sterling’s bedroom broke them apart. April scurried to move from her spot between Sterling’s legs. She found herself on all fours trying to find a new position while Sterling rushed to sit more upright tucking her legs underneath her. The sound of laughter, which did not belong to either one of them, pulled their attention toward the bedroom door.

Blair stood against the frame. Her hand rested on her stomach as she doubled over from laughter. “Oh man,” she wheezed, raising her hand to wipe the tears from her eyes. “That was great. I’m so mad I didn’t have my phone out.”

“Damn it, Blair!” Sterling exclaimed, tossing a pillow at her sister.

Blair knocked the cushion away and took in a dramatic gasp. “Language, Sterling Pearl Wesley! Language!”

April rolled her eyes finally settling into a seated position on the bed. “Was that really necessary?”

“No, but it was fun.” Blair shrugged as she rested her hand on the doorframe. “Dinner is almost ready. Mom said you should come down now.”

“We’ll be down in a minute.”

“Sounds good.” Blair grinned mischievously as she tossed a wink in April’s direction. “I’ll save you a seat between me and Sterl.”

April shot her a look. “Demon.”

“Monster-in-law,” Blair shot back before they shared an amused grin and she disappeared back down the hall.

April shook her head, huffing a laugh as she turned back to Sterling. Her girlfriend was sitting with her back against the headboard still and hear hand over her heart. She looked almost panic and April scurried closer to her concerned.

“What’s the matter, honey?” April asked, cupping her cheeks.

“Blair just gave me freakin’ heart attack,” Sterling explained, meeting April’s concerned look. “She is such a jackass sometimes.”

A small, amused smile crossed April’s lips. “She really got you because that’s twice you’ve used a semi-foul word.” She inched closer, placing a small kiss against Sterling’s forehead then moved back to meet her eyes again. “Are you going to be okay?”

Sterling nodded, swallowing thickly. “Yeah, I am kinda mad she ruined out moment.”

“We will have plenty of moments,” April reminded, squinting suddenly. “Hopefully, she won’t ruin _all_ of them.”

“Hopefully.”

April slowly moved her hands allowing the tips of her fingers to trace a tiny line down Sterling’s jaw. “I love you.”

The dopey smile returned to Sterling’s face. “I love you.”

“Merry Christmas, honey.”

“Merry Christmas, babe.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everybody who went on this little fluffy journey with us. We had a blast writing it, even as it spiralled out of control. Special thanks to those of you who took the time to leave a comment or otherwise reach out. Hearing from you and knowing that you were enjoying the fic gave us the energy needed to power through the rough patches.


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